The Richer Sex: How the New Majority of Female Breadwinners Is Transforming Sex, Love and Family

by Liza Mundy

A revolution is under way.

Within a generation, more households will be supported by women than by men. In The Richer Sex , Liza Mundy takes us to the exciting frontier of this new economic she shows us why this flip is inevitable, what painful adjustments will have to be made along the way, and how both men and women will feel surprisingly liberated in the end.
The bestselling author and Washington Post writer goes deep inside the lives of the couples on this cutting edge to paint of picture of how dating, marriage, and home life are changing. How does this new generation of breadwomen navigate paying for a night on the town? In whose interest is it to delay commitment? Are men for the first time thinking of marriage the way women used to—as a bet on the economic potential of a spouse? In this new world of men marrying up, are women learning to value new realms of male endeavor—like parenting, protection, and a margarita at the ready?
The future is here, with couples today debating who must assume the responsibility of primary earner and who gets the freedom of being the slow track partner. With more men choosing to stay home, Mundy shows how that lifestyle has achieved a higher status and all the ways males have found to recover their masculinity. And the revolution is Mundy takes us from Japan to Denmark to show how both sexes are adapting as the marriage market has turned into a giant free-for-all, with men and women at different stages of this transformation finding partners in other countries who match their expectations.
The Richer Sex is a wild ride into the future, grounded in Mundy’s peerless journalism, and bound to cause women and men of all generations to rethink what this social upheaval will mean.

Genres: Nonfiction, Feminism, Gender, Audiobook, Womens, Book Club, Finance

336 pages, Hardcover

First published January 1, 2012

About the author

Liza Mundy is an award-winning journalist and the New York Times bestselling author of five books, including CODE GIRLS, and her latest, THE SISTERHOOD.

Published in 2017, CODE GIRLS tells the story of more than 10,000 female code breakers recruited during World War II to perform work that saved countless lives, shortened a global war, and pioneered the modern computer and cybersecurity industries.

Available October 2023, THE SISTERHOOD is a gripping history of women in the CIA across three generations--beginning with unlikely female spies who served in the war and its aftermath, through to the women who tracked down Osama Bin Laden.

Her other titles include MICHELLE: A BIOGRAPHY; THE RICHER SEX; and EVERYTHING CONCEIVABLE.

In addition to her work as a narrative non-fiction author, Liza, a former staff writer for The Washington Post, writes about history, culture, and politics for publications such as The Atlantic and Politico.

At various points in her life as a working parent she has worked full-time, part-time, all-night, at home, in the office, remotely, in person, on trains, in the car, alone, in crowds, under duress, and while simultaneously making dinner.

Reviews

[Car Sal Fol · Rating 4 out of 5]

Thought-provoking and well researched. I would like to hear her offer more texture on how the increasing number of female breadwinners can affect structural changes in society. The writer highlights more of a switch in traditional roles than a more progressive standpoint.

[Doug Cornelius · Rating 4 out of 5]

Almost 40% of US working wives now outearn their husbands. Washington Post reporter Liza Mundy argues that “the Big Flip” in gender roles “is just around the corner” in her new book: The Richer Sex . Soon “women, not men, will become the top earners in households" and that will transform the dynamics of male-female relationships.

Mundy sprinkles interviews with women and men throughout the book to highlight her positions and theories. She sees the emergence of a country and world where both sexes are “freer to make purely romantic choices” based on individual preference rather than constrained by long-held stereotypes about who should be the primary breadwinner. For large parts of the US economy, you don't need physical strength and stamina to put food on the table and a roof over your head.

Mundy speculates that women are better adapting to the knowledge-driven economy of the United States. Middle skill jobs are disappearing. Men lost 75% of the 7 million jobs that disappeared during the Great Recession. Industrial jobs are being outsourced. That means making the educational leap to higher tier jobs. Women receive 57% of bachelor degrees and account for 60% of graduate school enrollment.

Mundy concludes that the bread-winning woman is dramatically changing the face of marriage and quality of marriage. They prefer a marriage of equals, or at least a man with strong career ambition and intellect. That means women would choose being single to being in a bad marriage. With their earning potential, they don't need a husband for financial support.

Mundy relates the story of a high-powered executive in a lackluster marriage, with a husband that was resentful of his wife's career. (He didn't have one.) They fought over getting a dog. He thought the dog would absorb too much of her time and affection. She ended up getting the dog and he got mad. Then she had a brainstorm. Get rid of him and keep the dog. "The dog is very supportive of her achievements."

This growth of female breadwinners is not just a US phenomenon. It's happening in South Korea, Japan, Singapore, France, Chile, Ireland, Belgium, Canada, the Philippines, and Norway. As the world economy is starting to rely more on brainpower than musclepower, women are the winning participants in the economy. There is still great inequality. But it's changing. This book looks ahead to where that may lead as women overtake men as the breadwinner.

I first heard of this book while listening to an interview of Liz Mundy on a podcast of C-SPAN's Book TV. (Yes, I'm that much of a geek.) The interview was great and prompted me to run down to the library and borrow a copy. I suggest you do the same.

[Carly Thompson · Rating 3 out of 5]

3.5 stars. This is a fascinating account of male/female relations and how women are currently out earning men in some areas and are on track to surpass them entirely in the near future. Mundy looks at the historical background (for centuries men were the breadwinners and women made less money), the current era where women are starting to surpass men, and what this means for marriages and relationships. She interviews couples where the female is the higher earner and also interviews various researchers (economists, sociologists, anthropologists) and reports on their research into the subject.

I really enjoyed reading this; it was definitely thought-provoking about the nature of masculinity and femininity, the division of labor in marriage and romantic relationships, raising children, what a man or a woman looks for in a mate, and working in the information age. I didn't give this book 4 stars because of the author's habit of projecting what she imagines/believes the future to be like. For example: "Women will envy husbands who are at home, cooking and watching the children. Women will hoard authority. They will not be as nice about all this, perhaps, as they should be. They will complain that men can't do anything correctly. They will text too many domestic reminders and to-do lists. . . ." (p. 112). Also: "In the future, something similar will happen. Women who remain determined to find a partner 'on their level' will travel to seek this elusive species. Women with resources--especially women in big cities with airport hubs--will rescue the travel industry, keeping airlines aloft in pursuit of long-term companions." (p. 203) I found this constant speculation, written in the simple future tense of will to be annoying especially since no one knows exactly what will happen; Mundy's opinions are only conjecture (albeit conjecture based on observing the current situation and making an informed guess.)

I also found that Mundy focused mainly on upper middle class (lots of engineers and executives) and middle class women (she interviewed many Hispanic women in South Texas who worked in education); I would be interesting in how the wage gap is effective lower class women.

A good, but not perfect book about contemporary life.

[Amelia · Rating 1 out of 5]

I heard a review of this book recently & decided to check it out, even though I disagree with its central argument. It claims that because American women are currently going to graduate school at higher rates than men, our economy will be transformed: in the near future, women will be the main breadwinners of their families, and the majority of men will become stay at home dads.

My problem with it, obviously, is that it doesn't advocate for equality. The life that the author proposes is a lot like the nuclear, heteronormative, monogamous one we're living now, just with a gender role reversal. It comes across as feminist, but falls short.

I'd like to see it go a few steps further. But I'm only two chapters in, so we'll see, I guess. For now, I'm having fun arguing with it. :)

[Candy · Rating 5 out of 5]

First things first: it doesn't even bash men, so relax. Informative and vastly entertaining. Very much so enjoyed the wonderful perspectives from each angle and varying familial households.

4 general points (of many) the author makes:
- "Women instinctively hide their achievements and income" I see no lies ma'am.

- "We develop ways to make men comfortable" hands down that has got to be the most triggering statement Liza wrote due to its truth.

- "Women value autonomy more than ever before"
It is 2020 so I'd like to think we've made progress and the author can replace the word value with the word require, to accurately reflect the current landscape.

- "Christian culture tends to be hyper-masculinized." Then goes on to to precisely converse about the women in religious communities and the awkward/ backward realities high powered women are beginning to face that in essence directly conflict within traditional religions. Now as she explained this, I could have fallen off my chair with how she stepped into scorching hot territory and just as quickly wandered out of it. However it leaves me to ponder if avoiding the obvious is intentionally done to reinforce men's egos in traditional patriarchal structured faiths or more so from fear of associated stigma bucking the system.

The author even looks at cultures abroad and whoa buddy, did she nail it. When talking to a man from the Asiatic region and I quote "The problem with American women he said is that they know they are equal.” May I say, he is not wrong in the slightest because even my red blood cells KNOW without the shadow of a doubt, they are equal to or more superior when compared against a man. (Real quick: it's not trash talking or hate, if it's truth. Personally believe, females are not alive to protect any man's ego nor diminish themselves to make men feel superior.)

Overall this is a beloved chef's kiss in the form of a portable flat rectangle everyone should checkout as society changes since there is a "clash of economic realities and social values" at present. Can't even wait to stir up irritation discussing these hot topic discussion points within my circle.

5 stars for exceptional palpable relevancy.

[Kaci · Rating 4 out of 5]

Although an interesting read, it seems a little speculative and bias. It argues that society will basically be the same, just reversed. Women will want to work long hours to be the family breadwinner while men will want to stay home and take on the majority of the housework. I was looking for a more 50/50 perspective.

[Daniel Gullotta · Rating 2 out of 5]

This is the sort of book I wish I could give 2.5 stars, because I am perfectly mixed on it.
First, the obvious: The Richer Sex was published at the height of the “new female breadwinner” moment (2012), and in hindsight, much of it now reads as wishcasting. Mundy’s central claim (that women were on the verge of routinely out-earning men and “flipping” the gender script) just hasn’t materialized on the scale or with the ease she predicts. In 2025, we’re still waiting for the “Big Flip.” Most of her predictions (that women would happily marry “down,” men would flock to successful women, home life would become masculinized, and sex lives would improve) have proven, at best, wildly optimistic and, at worst, almost laughably wrong.
Her commentary on Japan, for example, is really outdated. If anything, the situation there has only gotten worse, with deepening gender divides and fewer marriages or births than ever. Throughout, Mundy isn’t especially friendly to men facing this new reality; her main advice is basically “suck it up.” She has little sympathy for women who want to be homemakers or have babies either. Her tone is often dismissive, like anyone who prefers a more traditional arrangement just needs to get over it. She doesn’t seriously grapple with why so many people still want the old model, or how the “new normal” is creating its own mess of complications. There’s a lack of nuance, and a relentless hopefulness that now feels naive.
That said, her big-picture history of how women’s economic dependence shaped marriage is clear and persuasive. The sections on education trends and the dating struggles of high-earning women are genuinely interesting. But overall, this book captures a moment when the future looked more “female breadwinner” than actually panned out.

[Busy · Rating 5 out of 5]

As a single woman who is going to get married someday, I am aiming for equality, but I also would not mind if my husband makes more than me. I would love to own my own small business and set me own hours. While I always want to make my own money, it would be wonderful to have a steady income and benefits for my hypothetical family to rely on. This book is a useful thought exercise because it makes women consider, "What if the responsibility falls on my shoulders?" This, and other issues discussed in the book, were ones I had rarely- if ever- thought about, at least not in such concrete terms. I have a graduate degree- to say I'm "marrying down" if I choose someone with a BA is quite frankly something I never considered. The pool of highly educated men- especially American men- is sadly small, one thing that does appear clearly relevant five years later. It was a bit depressing to basically be told I will have to settle for someone without a graduate education. I'm not a snob, but it's a distinct and significant life experience. Going through it means you are much likelier to have something in common with me than people who hasn't. As far as I can tell this is true of any graduate degree, from public administration to biological research to law school to astrophysics. C'est la vie- maybe I'll marry someone with a graduate degree and live happily ever in equality after all. This book was an interesting read, even if I never have to be a breadwoman.

[Lawrence Lewis · Rating 3 out of 5]

(Audible) A bit dated, but still worthwhile audiobook. I recognize that women dominate academic spaces after high school, because as the author points out “college is built for the female brain.” However, I disagree that the answer for women that do not want to marry down is to find a man, and “make him enroll in college.” The build a bear paradigm is hardly a dynamic I see working for women.

I honestly struggled many times to understand what the author meant by marrying down because she mixed and matched different ideas at times. Obviously a woman that was raised upper middle class and graduated from an Ivy League law school is marrying down when she selected a plumber raised lower middle class. However, the same woman marrying an entrepreneur, raised upper middle class, who makes $10K less annually than she does has definitely not married down, because he did not attend college. Similarly, a Hispanic woman raised lower middle class does not marry down when she marries a Hispanic male raised lower middle class, because she graduated college and makes $47K, while he is an electrician making $45K, especially if she brings $75K in debt with her. The author does what a number of podcasters do in 2024 when they talk about relationships between men and women. She talks about a man’s actual annual earnings compared to a woman’s potential earnings, and then talks about differences.

I enjoyed the book, but the marrying up and marrying down things threw me a little bit.

[Lindy Kyzer · Rating 4 out of 5]

This was a book written largely based on academic research and referencing economic trends from when it was written - 2012. So, take that into account. But I recently interviewed Liza and in my research I noted this, which I hadn't come across before, and figured it was worth checking out. As you would expect from Liza it's well-researched and engaging. It's a tough topic because generalizations around gender really don't work. I appreciated that she noted that even in the 1950s journalists were talking about a crisis in masculinity. I guess we've never been able to come to enough consensus around what femininity is to be in crisis? The key takeaway here is that generalizations around gender roles don't work as women continue to dominate across colleges and many workplaces. Everyone is looking for their complement - and what that actually looks like will vary in every couple.

[Camille · Rating 2 out of 5]

2.5 Stars. It’s wild how outdated parts of this are already. Well-researched and an important topic, but focused too heavily on the economic aspects of relationships. The emotional component of relationships is too fundamental to ignore. Exemplifies my issues with the overall field of economics—unsurprisingly, the book can’t escape the limitations of the field.

[Jeanne · Rating 3 out of 5]

Was definitely a bit repetitive but there were some interesting studies mentioned. I'd be Interested in a updated book that took into account the pandemic time period and the impact that had on this shift.

[Felicia Lindsay · Rating 2 out of 5]

Interesting but very repetitive

[Crista Colvin · Rating 4 out of 5]

Already somewhat outdated only eight years after publication. The author's optimism has not completely borne out.

[Jason Paulateer · Rating 4 out of 5]

Interesting read!

[Ietrio · Rating 1 out of 5]

I wanted to like this book. I really did. But this is not a study. This is not philosophy. This is sensationalist journalism and click bait. And I was baited. I have to admit it.

Liza Mundy is not a feminist. She is some sort of christian in need of money. Long dead are the days when a journalist can make money by just reporting stuff. And it is normal. This kind of job should have gone voluntary by the time mobile phones started shipping with cameras. And having better grammar should not cover for a dramatic lack of understanding of an issue.

I got the smell of rotten in the beginning. So some people think the woman's inferiority is god given and others thin is 'Darwin given'? And from there the text goes downhill. According to Mundy people will certainly reverse into the Middle Ages, only the roles will be inverted: men with search to marry well and women will have careers. After all, in Mundy's mind everything is about marriage and mating. Just like the Catholic church people do not have to feel good and have friends. No. They should build a nest, just like any common furred weasel.

The text is filled with patriarchy slogans like 'breadwinners'. Sure, the priest still roars about this, but that is modern considering the delivered text is still 2000 years old. But today in the developed world the minimal wage might not give you a shelter, but can give you plenty of food. Or, at least, minimal wage can give you shelter and plenty of water, because Jesus keeps the price of fish high.

The whole documentation is anecdotal. And when possible there is the appeal to authority: X, 'the Nobel prize winner'. Aha!

Christian fundamentalist junk is peering from every corner: so men need 'women whom they love and admire'. How about just friends, partners and colleagues?

Men, also are said to cling to their old status. Only the men in questions never had that authority status. At best the author can argue those men wish the status of their grandfathers.

And everybody has a place, just like in the catholic dogma, so every few pages women have these options and men have these options. And it keeps going and going and going just like the energizer bunny. A lot of words to say nothing. A lot of words to say how people SHOULD behave and nothing more than 'a hispanic/african/whatever woman I have interviewed said...' when it comes to what people do at the time.

Anyway Mundy's field of understanding it limited to the white christian world. Everything else is the same, only decades/centuries behind. Meaning they are bound to follow the white christian civilization.

The gays are irrelevant, as marriage is made of a daddy and a mommy. In the story. The men are destined to make themselves pretty and learn to cook in order to attract some woman. Only that jobs are automated and cooking can be done better in large quantities. But the gospel tells something that makes Mundy oblivious to this: who does not work should not eat. And as women were used as home drones, now men should do the same because humanity has to regress to the age of the Garden of Eden instead of evolving. So men 'are given' the right to be violent in the family by some supernatural being. The lack of sanction and the education are irrelevant, neither being important for the church.

Mundy is equally inept in economy as in sociology, which does not stop the author from going on with the economic predictions. Again, this is valid for the whole World, only the darkies are too backward to see it happening right now.

The employed vocabulary is disgusting: 'domestication', 'masculinity' (which has to be proven!), 'praise'.

In short, a book about the current changes in gender roles is very needed. And I am not aware of anything like this. This book is rich in words and shallow in research. For example the multiple branches of misogynistic scientism are barely touched with a few references to evolutionary psychology and psychoanalysts.

Still, this book might have been majestic, if written in the days of Virginia Woolf. But for the 21st century, this is a silly book about power, win-lose and conspiracies.

[Christina Mitchell · Rating 3 out of 5]

So what is the big deal? More women worldwide are educated and earning the money. Why is this such a compelling phenomena? The answer: because it is turning notions of parenthood, relationships, sex, and gender roles on their heads. With that turning comes considerable discomfort.

An educated person knows that society evolves. Those wishing to hark back to the good ole days often forget that them good ole days included women who couldn't vote, slavery, severe class warfare that included child labor and women locked in factories that burned down. It included addicting women who complained to heroine and anti-depressants making them believe they'd gone mad. It meant domestic abuse was hushed up giving wives no recourse but to stay put and take the beating. Thank goodness things change.

Mundy gives extensive consideration to the changes occurring in our society. She speculates on the changes currently in process and what these changes mean for the future. Are these changes bad? Probably not. Absolutely not, if people are willing to adapt. As Mundy advises, it's all about coming to new definitions of male and female, re-defining gender roles. For example, it isn't such a bad thing that men want to stay at home with their children while the women earn the money. If the jibing and ridicule on the social and family front (in-laws, etc.) would knock off the crap, a couple might just find a partnership that works outstandingly well.

Of course, not everyone will embrace change, and this is where the pitfalls lie. More women, more educated women, in tandem with less men and less educated men, mean that marriage is diminishing. Mundy specifically cites women who have remained single, "coupled" up with girlfriends (domestic or supportive relationships with no sexual activity), or simply choose to marry down. If women hang on to notions of traditional marriage, they will have to sacrifice their careers, and have to settle for the potentiality of a lesser income from a man. Men, on the other hand, are either all too willing to let her bring home the bacon while doing little but playing video games all day, or are so indignant at the changes they go abroad to find a traditionally subservient wife.

My opinion of all this: suck it up, cupcakes! Change is inevitable. Women are out enrolling and out graduating men in college. Get used to the idea that they have equal say in a relationship. I have pretty much done away with the prospect of coupling with a man. I cannot take the bullshit anymore. I no longer care to fight for him to notice me, support me, or applaud me. I will no longer accept a man who is unmotivated, and hell bent on making himself look more dominant by being with a weak woman. I have choices, and I have made mine. I know I sound exactly like the woman these 50s-style men would like to send back to the kitchen. Guess what? I do not answer to them, have to earn their respect, or care with they think. And, that is perfect! There is someone out there who will provide me everything I need emotionally without the competition or hurt ego. Gender isn't a priority. Anyone can fuck anyone else...it's a physical act anyone can carry out (though some are better at it than others). Men had their chance and they blew it. Time to explore other options.

If this all revealing too much, I do not apologize. I am hurt, tired, angry, and disappointed. I want that to come through in this review and I hope I've succeeded.

[Sara · Rating 3 out of 5]

There has been some discussion regarding the gender gap in the recovery following a recession which left many young people out of work. In the meantime, it has been argued, women have been taking advantage of the slow job market to become more educated, and thus, more prepared to take the jobs which have been coming available — those requiring skills in technology, written and verbal communication, and administration; meanwhile, men who once excelled at the blue-collar, manufacturing jobs, are falling behind as those jobs are made obsolete by technology or outsourced to other countries. This book takes a look at how this has affected women and their interactions with men and other women, influenced their decisions regarding families and children, challenged them to redefine femininity without emasculating men or trying to become men.

One critic of this book mentioned that the author’s idea of the newly transformed gender roles looks a lot like a mere reversal of traditional male/female roles, in which the man now stays at home and takes care of domestic matters, caring for children, and cooking, while the woman has the high-powered, well-paying office job, instead of a more balanced, equal state in which things are evenly shared. I would suggest that the whole premise of the book is that our economy and educational system are promoting inequality, and thus Mundy’s description of these effects does show an accurate representation of what will happen if things are not changed. Other books have made the argument that a majority of schools and curriculum are designed such that girls, who tend to pick up more quickly on verbal and written communication, will excel while boys, who tend to mature later and are attracted by action and movement, often do not focus and learn as quickly, thus promoting inequality in education, which can result in less investment in schooling, lower expectations from college and career. “Why Boys Fail” by Richard Whitmire is a great book that looks into this, and makes some suggestions as to how to remedy it.

One of the sections of the book that was most interesting to me was the chapter that examined the role of men and women in Japan, a country which recently experienced a similar recession, wiping out the job prospects of many young people, and in which the women are highly educated. Men and women there are learning to navigate a new style of relating and marrying, which is particularly vital to their country since the population has shrunk drastically and there is a severe lack of younger people to help support the elderly. Although Americans are not yet in this state, it is important to see how other first-world countries are addressing the problem, and what their solutions may look like.

[Eleanor · Rating 4 out of 5]

I mostly picked this up because I loved Everything Conceivable-- for the subject (IVF) but also for how well written and readable it was--the kind of book that makes me wonder why I don't read more non-fiction.. (until I read something else that is like pulling teeth.)

This book wasn't as good as I remember Everything Coceivable being. The organization/structure seems sort of random and it felt like the numbers from studies were just flung here and there to support whatever the author happened to feel like talking about in that moment of the book. And overall the author basically seeks to support the division of labor at home.. which is fine, except that she doesn't come out and say it and still hangs onto this pseudo unbiased reporter attitude. (the voice is a little in and out in general.) and she also doesn't really construct a great argument or assemble much evidence to support this. (or if she did it was at some random middle portion of the book). it's largely... anecdotes. which are great for illustrating but irritating when that's the main evidence..

those are my concessions - (and the anecdotal proving stuff is all about having one at-home parent. the main idea of the book-- women earning more, how it affects marriage, family, etc-- all well laid out and Not prescriptive.)

- 4 stars because still well written, interesting to read, and most importantly to me-- it made me think about a few things in a slightly different way. (nevermind the thesis of the book.) by the end I was thinking of all the people I know who I would like to read it and wondering how irritated they would be by the suggestion/gift.

I felt like it got a little bit preachy/self-helpy and overly rosy at the end.. where I would put something more thoughtful and considered and opened.. but that bit was in the middle of the book.. back to the weird structuring. But I would say definitely read it! stick it out through the first bit... it gets better and more readable.
I also like to think that maybe the publisher forced/strongly encouraged the author to have a black and white/definitive stance, with "woman as breadwinner" because it's easier to sell books and generate reviews and criticism and discussion that way... and that the author had actually originally hoped to write more nuanced arguments. although that doesn't explain away the random chapters and chapter sections.

[Leah · Rating 3 out of 5]

A very interesting and thought-provoking book. For me, it was interesting reading this not too long after I read Half the Sky. The two books paint two very different pictures of women’s lives in the 21st century; the difference between the picture of educated first-world women portrayed by Mundy couldn’t be a starker contrast to the women of the third world profiled in Half the Sky. The difference, as Mundy emphasizes over and over, is education. In the first-world countries she covers (including the U.S., Japan, and countries in the E.U.), women are beginning to surpass men in terms of education, and more and more women are becoming breadwinners. Half the Sky shows the opposite side of the coin: women in countries around the world being denied a basic education simply because they are female. Although Mundy puts a positive spin on her predicted world of female breadwinners and helpful domesticated husbands, I can’t help but think that the yawning void between the “haves” and the “have nots” of the world will continue to expand, and the consequences can’t be good. But that’s not the issue Mundy tackles in The Richer Sex. Mundy plants her feet firmly in the world of today’s educated, working woman, and explores the many ways in which society, families and interpersonal relationships are affected by women’s education and women’s earnings. For anyone interested in these issues, it’s well worth it to read this book, filled with both research and anecdotal reporting, as opposed to getting freaked out by two-minute television soundbites on the news. And if you don’t want to put in the time to read the book (which is actually a pretty quick read), I’d recommend this interview the author did on public radio for a thoughtful discussion of the issues covered in the book: http://www.kera.org/2012/04/03/the-ne...

[T · Rating 3 out of 5]

I read this book in lieu of The End of Men, which hadn't come out yet at the time and is on a very similar subject, because I had been fascinated by the spate of articles recently on changing gender roles and dynamics. While parts of this book were interesting I found myself frustrated for several reasons.

1. The author tended to take an anecdote or a single statistic and use it to construct a story about how drastically the culture has changed, expanding from that single point as if it alone was evidence of a culture-wide shift. I often wasn't convinced the shift was more than a few of the author's friends so far.
2. The author's understanding and use of statistics was rather questionable at times.
3. While some chapters were evenly written (and the author does makes a point of discussing male-focused counterpoints when she can), a number of sections seem to assume that the rise of women is a part of a zero-sum game that men will have to lose in to balance out. I think this is a false sense though, the world is not a zero sum game and everyone can win from less rigid social roles. The author's tendency to write this way hinted at an inferiority complex or a sense of misandry that just seemed gratuitous and distracting.

Overall I didn't get much out of this book that I hadn't already gotten from reading all the articles in The Atlantic's threads around Why Women Still Can’t Have It All and The End of Men and similar articles on their new The Sexes channel. I'd recommend you save time and money and go there.

[Allison · Rating 3 out of 5]

A fascinating read on what I consider to be a very important topic. Many factors have come into play in our society in creating a world where now in many couples the woman's earning potential is greater than the man's. This has a lot to do with women pursuing more education, the loss of many jobs in male-dominated fields in the recent recession, the rise of information industry, and more men looking for family-friendly and flexible careers. I definitely thing these are things we are going to be seeing more and more of soon, and I'm looking forward to a day when a stay-at-home dad and a breadwinning mother are commonplace.

However, so much of this book is highly speculative. Mundy does look at facts and it is clear that she has done a lot of research as well as many, many interesting interviews and first person accounts. But about 50% of this book was just speculation and conjecture for what this future world of breadwinning women will look like. I thought that amount of speculation was excessive and often had me rolling my eyes. Despite this flaw, I will still be recommending this book to others because the topic is an important one and there were so many parts as I was reading that I thought, "I wish my husband was reading this book, because I need to talk about this with him!"

[Erik · Rating 3 out of 5]

Going into this I had one main hope/expectation, that it would confirm the viability of my life plan of getting a job with a law firm, marrying a lawyer, being a secondary earner/domestic support to her more demanding professional aspirations. The conclusion definitely hits hard in this optimistic direction but reading between the lines of the anecdote-heavy, data-light treatment, I saw a lot of reason for skepticism that this change will really happen soon enough for me. It seems that at least for now, the rising economic prospects of women is just making them as tough to deal with as men. The book, like most non-fiction books, feels overwritten (at least given its lack of harder data), but one area that felt distinctly underserved was international comparison. The author talks in some detail about the example of Japan, and the Far East more generally, which is a rather more negative portrait. I would have liked more detail on Scandinavia where arguably gender egalitarianism is most naturally carried out.

Oh, and with all the talk about the impact of this switch on dating dynamics, one thing that received almost no mention was the prospect of women initiating relationships. That men were to be pursuers was not questioned at all, and so long as there is no equality in that onus, I shall consider feminism a sham.

[Maria · Rating 3 out of 5]

College education means more pay, so what are the consequences of more women earning degrees than men? Mundy explores the social stigmas, and implications through intensive interviews with women who are earning more than their husbands and boyfriends.

Why I started this book: The title and book blurb intrigued me, and I wanted to read Mundy's insights and conclusions.

Why I finished it: Mundy leads with all the negative; stereotypes, expectations and accepted wisdom for when women earn more than men. It's rough going, but she ends with the hope and conviction that we are an adaptable species and culture. Going Solo: The Extraordinary Rise and Surprising Appeal of Living Alone also pointed out that it is the better educated women and the least educated men that struggle to find mates with this new shift in education and earnings. I have to say that it hits a little too close to home sometimes.

[Erica · Rating 3 out of 5]

I thought this book was very eye-opening, although one-sided. I think all in all, the author made some points that we already knew as an American society, roles are shifting with the changes in the economy, as they have been for the past 50 years. Women have been working and achieving more equal pay as the years have gone by and some men have had to step into the "typical" female role of staying home with the children.

I think one point Mundy did make was the impact that the changing workforce is having on an international level. She had some interesting things to say about the Japanese, and really how their society has made drastic changes in order to promote match-making, and essentially the productivity of their country. Overall, I think this book was thought-provoking if nothing else.

[Elizabeth · Rating 5 out of 5]

The first part of this book is filled with statistics that shocked me yet in another way didn't surprise me. It was very interesting seeing the facts about how many women are going to school, waiting to get married and having trouble finding a man who is of equal eduction and ambition. One thing I found funny is that the phrase 'opting-out' is used quite a bit and although she meant opting out of the workforce, I kept thinking she was talking about opting out of dating because I know many beautiful, successful women who are doing so now. The rest of the book is well organized and has a lot of real stories which started to feel repetitive only at the very end. One hit very close to home and was difficult to read. Apparently I am a part of a trend and just a piece of data in all of these statistics. Very well researched and well written and a must read for anyone living in this century.

[Mike Moskos · Rating 3 out of 5]

Listening to this on audiobook, I found myself wanted to scream at most of the women profiled in this book. But, to be fair, the author brings it together in the end, offering a future of less rigid gender roles.

Ex: The underlying assumption in this book is that earning more or climbing the organizational ladder are THE marks of success. To bust your ass studying, going into major debt to secure advanced degrees, working 50-80 hours a week in uncomfortable clothes, at the beck and call of the boss via the omnipresent screen all so one can have a nicer car to drive back and forth to work, a nicer home enjoyed by your dependents and some free time on the weekends to go hiking? Seriously?

Should be read by any men before he gets married though--you should know you're out the door if you don't earn pretty damn close to what she does (women in the U.S. initiate 92% of divorces).

[Kelly Kinkade · Rating 5 out of 5]

I picked up this book because the author was on Jon Stewart to promote it, and her discussion seemed fairly coherent so I figured I'd give it a try. I wasn't really sure what to expect, but I was very pleasantly surprised. This book is a provocative and very nonjudgmental examination of current trends in marriage and relationship-forming as influenced by the very real fact that women are increasingly outperforming men economically. The author does a very good job of illuminating trends, including where those trends seem to be contradictory, and in presenting examples of different sorts of behavior. If nothing else, I think this book is an excellent resource simply for the woman who needs to know that she's not the only one facing these issues.

[Margaret · Rating 4 out of 5]

My son was worried I was reading a feminist propaganda when I started this book. I didn't find it to be that at all. Instead I found a book that proposes a world I quite aspire to; a world in which people are able to play to their strengths without having to take gender into account. I've always believed that true equality for women has nothing to do with ensuring that every aspect of life should be 50% male and 50% female, but rather that I should be able to aspire to whatever I want to aspire to without having to stop and wonder whether that's OK or appropriate of whatever for a girl. And how refreshing to consider that this is a right men should be entitled to as well. This book gives me hope that my children may grow up to love in such a place,

[Reshma · Rating 3 out of 5]

This is an interesting book. It explores societal and familial changes as women become more educated. What does it mean for marriage? For relationships? My main complaint was that the author makes it sound like we've already reached some type of tipping point in society where women are equal to or do better than men. There's little exploration of the lives of low income women, women who drop out of the workforce when they have kids, and women who continue to suffer discrimination in the workplace. Still, a good read.