I enjoyed the story. The premise of the story was good and had me interested immediately. It was very funny and the writing good (in terms of plot), but quite UK centric (which isn't an entirely bad thing). The British self-deprecating humour came to the fore in the writing.
I'd have given it 5 but for a few things that constantly niggled at me.
1) The utter lack of proofreading - if there WAS any proofreading of this novel then it was done by a dyslexic with absolutely NO grammatical skills whatsoever. The worst Kindle novel I've come across for typos and grammatical errors. Really, really bad (and I'm not normally one to fuss over these kind of things so that gives you some idea as to how bad it is). I am the last person to talk about typos and errors in grammar, believe me, but for them to be detected by me must make them appallingly obvious, and at times really detracted from the enjoyment of the story.
2) The story's protagonist is meant to be 26 years old, but she says things and/or acts like someone much older, referencing points in popular culture that wouldn't be something that would necessarily apply to her (Eg: wanting to audition for voice work on Spitting Image - which ended in 1996, she'd have been 11 at the time, or the comparison of her plight with a character on coronation Street in which the event took place in 1995 - when she was 10. The latter is feasible as a storyline in a soap that could stay in her memory for that length of time, especially as it was a major storyline for some time, and with subsequent TV nostalgia sound-bite look backs). There were other subtleties that just didn't sound right. I just felt all the time that this 26 year old was being written by someone at least 40 years old. I kept having to remind myself that the character of Samantha/Crystal was 26 and NOT 40. Why she couldn't have been 40 I don't know.
3) The somewhat sloppy ending. The story could have ended at least 2 chapters earlier but was drawn out and went into a direction that was frankly predictable and unwarranted. It was a great read until those final chapters (and the final 'twist' of the story) happened.
Other than those three points, I actually did enjoy it. It was funny and well executed (until the final two chapters) - I'd have like to have said 'well written' but with the typos and grammatical errors I can't really use those words. I recommend it as a quick, light read.