Create Your Own Light: Finding Post Traumatic Purpose

by Travis Howze, Alyssa Hurd (Illustrator), Erich Roden (Editor)

From taking human life to being assigned to the body recovery team of nine brother firefighters, including one of his best friends, U.S. Marine, former Police Officer and Firefighter Travis Howze was plagued with extreme Post Traumatic Stress, Depression and Survivors Guilt from a lifetime of very traumatic exposures dating back to early childhood. Victorious in the fight for his very own life at just three months old, his struggle to survive was just the beginning. Years later, he would defeat the very silent and deadly killer, PTSD, but not before it caused massive carnage and collateral damage to his personal and professional life. From Class Clown to professional Stand-Up Comedian and Speaker, Travis’ UNBELIEVABLY GRIPPING, uncensored autobiography is a MUST READ that takes you on an emotional roller coaster ride through the eyes of an emergency responder. Follow Travis through countless horrific events, from funny stories inside of the Firehouse, Patrol Car, and Marine Corps, to Stand-Up Comedy Stages and the dark places first responders have to go to in their mind to survive.This true, hard-hitting story is about staying in the fight. It’s about never quitting yourself, always getting up, doing the things you love, and how the power of perspective, attitude, ownership and acceptance can lead to LIFE CHANGING personal growth and a more PURPOSEFUL LIFE.

263 pages, Kindle Edition

Published May 26, 2020

Reviews

[Yvonne Davis · Rating 2 out of 5]

DNF. Let me preface this review with I am the wife of a retired LEO with 20 years of service. While I fully appreciate the stories illustrating the types of calls and the stress first responders experience, I was expecting for more of the “how” to deal with PTSD from those calls. I was hoping to learn the strategies for first responders suffering from PTSD.

[Steven Medina · Rating 5 out of 5]

I learned about the book and author on a firefighter podcast I listen to frequently. Travis was the guest on the podcast. The author and I had similar experiences with PTSD. Reading this book almost was like reading about me. Some good points and resources were discovered when I read this book. One of the best books on PTSD I’ve ever read.

[Amy Witkowski · Rating 5 out of 5]

He beings mental health to the surface and truly opens your eyes. This is a must for first responders, firefighters, law enforcement, EMS, corrections, medical AND the people around them. Travis is truly inspiring and eye opening.. and if you can ever see him in person, it is life changing.

[Meg · Rating 3 out of 5]

Oof. I hate to rate this one poorly because the premise is SUCH an important topic. But…

- The book needed an editor (even a competent friend) to do a review. There were just too many mistakes.
- The author’s history is compelling and tragic and makes the book a quick, easy read that you don’t want to put down…but the content doesn’t start until page 302 and then mostly ends at page 322. The brief conclusion on 348 is also good.
- This should have been titled more as a memoir and basically labeled “how not to behave in public service”

I’d love to see the author do another book focused more on what his speeches focus on. I haven’t been able to see him yet in person, but from what I’ve seen - his speech content is so much more important than this book provides.

[Miranda Erwin · Rating 5 out of 5]

Just a nurse here....

As a nurse, this book was an excellent read. I'm not a first responder, fire fighter or military. What I can tell you is, the trauma will still trauma lol This book absolutely touches on areas of trauma beyond what we see in the medical profession, but what your own mindset can create for you to overcome. I stumbled upon his tiktok videos, shared a few to Facebook and one of the EMS guys I work with told me about the book! I was shocked that in some areas of this book I identified with the thoughts and reactions he had to certain situations. Overall, great read.

[Tyler Parrott · Rating 5 out of 5]

Travis goes in depth on his accounts of personal struggle and suffering through PTSD along with how he is overcoming the constant battle with it. As a fellow veteran and high performing individual I found this book to be extremely helpful with the way I look at life.

It gives you a perspective that makes you self analyze and realize what you can do to make changes and handle stress more effectively. It is a relatively thick book but super easy to read and found that it was so interesting that I completed it in a day.

[Kalynn · Rating 1 out of 5]

Physical book. It was really hard to get over all the grammar errors. Even after I consciously did, I found the book to just have lots of stories of hardship and not much to it following. It read like he just “decided” to change his mental attitude. Being someone who has struggled with depression and anxiety, I found it hats to get behind that. I am glad that the author has found his purpose but I guess I expected more of HOW he made it through his mental struggles.

[Tim · Rating 3 out of 5]

Enjoyed the author's appearance on the Cleared Hot podcast. Didn't realize that it was a full retelling of the book. Mostly a personal memoir and recounting of events that brought the author to his current occupation. Glad he found his path. Might want to give the full text another pass by the editor's desk.

[Mixon Trammell · Rating 5 out of 5]

As a first responder for over 20 years now, this book really hit home for me. There were some really uncomfortable moments that I needed to hear so I know I wasn’t the only one who has been through something like that. Highly recommend this book for any first responder (and second responders for those hose daggers out there).

[Drew Gaona · Rating 5 out of 5]

Travis story has impacted my life. I picked this up on Amazon, just trying to find more books to read. Going through some struggles myself, I realized that more people have their own eternal battles that they are fighting. Never give up no matter how hard life gets. You can also reach out to people. You may feel like you are alone, but you have family and friends who love you.

[BreAnne Gugin · Rating 5 out of 5]

this is a must read for anyone dealing with PTSD or even a family member that you know is dealing with it. He shows you deep into his life and the battles he took to get back to his calling.
I want to see this man in a seminar, hes true to himself and thats what helps you truly heal
thank you Travis for sharing your story.

[Chris Sheridan · Rating 3 out of 5]

I decided to read this after I saw Travis speak when he came to our town. His show and book are entertaining and have some laugh out loud parts. My biggest hold up is he never really talks about any treatment or steps he took to get better. That being said, I see the benefit of hearing his story, traumas, and the signs he recognized to realize there was an issue.

[susana · Rating 5 out of 5]

BEST BOOK IVE EVER READ

Thank you Scrotum, for your story. I couldn’t have imagined that this book would come to my hands when I needed it the most. You’re a bright shining star amongst the darkest nights.

[Shaun nolan · Rating 5 out of 5]

It was funny, heart breaking,and eye opening.

[Jason T · Rating 5 out of 5]

Lots of good stuff in here. “ no one is going to rescue you “ create your own light. What a great read. I bought this book after hearing Travis on Cleared Hot Podcast. AWESOME 💪💪💪

[Michelle · Rating 4 out of 5]

4.25⭐️

[Morgan Lane · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book was an emotional rollercoaster. I binged it in one day. Definitely worth the read.

[Rebecca Fairchild · Rating 5 out of 5]

Absolutely amazing book for anybody that is in the first responder line of work and great for spouses .

[Amy Watson · Rating 1 out of 5]

Lots of typos, profanity galore, more like a stream of consciousness than a book really, the important points of this story about PTSD could be encapsulated better in just a pamphlet.

[Zach Larson · Rating 4 out of 5]

This is a good book about how to manage moving on after a career full of traumatic events. It teaches the reader how to have a Post Traumatic Purpose rather than Disorder

[Ashley Bullard · Rating 5 out of 5]

I absolutely loved it! Makes me even more excited to see him speak in a few weeks in NC! "During our darkest moments we must create our own light"

[Joseph Flynn · Rating 5 out of 5]

Great book

A very outstanding book! I can relate to a lot of things in here. I have experienced many of the same similar things. I hope that people know that it’s OK to ask for help.