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Screwed up somehow but not stupid, life with a learning disability
When Peter Flom was five years old, his parents were told that he had "minimal brain dysfunction" and would never go to college. Peter skipped one year of high school, did college in three years, got his BA at twenty and now has two MAs and a Ph.D. He's married and has two sons. He also has a different diagnosis: Nonverbal Learning Disability. In "Screwed Up Somehow but Not Stupid," Peter describes what it's like to live life with a learning disability, but also with some abilities.
174 pages, Paperback
Published January 1, 2016
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January 18, 2016Since I am the author, I don't think it would be right for me to review this book (it's amazingly, stunningly brilliant! Fantastic! Wonderful!) (Oh, and by the way, I was once told that people with nonverbal learning disability - which I have - don't have a sense of humor).
August 5, 2022
Overview:
This is a guide on how to understand and help those with a nonverbal learning disability, an NLD. A nonverbal learning disability is a type of learning disability, which has difficulty with nonverbal communication. Trouble with processing nonverbal information. Those with an NLD are not just different, they are differently different. Different because of the different way information is processed. They think differently.
Nonverbal information such as emotions, body language, and facial expressions are influential factors in communication, but NLD individuals cannot readily understand nonverbal signals. Can take time to process the information, but the pauses can cause misunderstanding. What neuro-typical individuals do automatically, is difficult for an NLD individual.
NLD individuals cannot be generalized, for each is a unique case. Everyone who has an NLD has different problems. NLD individuals tend to think in words, and have trouble integrating nonverbal and verbal information. Can be literal, and have a focus on details. The meaning of nonverbal information needs to be taught.
A Disability:
Being labeled an NLD does not change the individual, it does change how the individual is approached. Being labeled means having more information and can use that information to get help and support. There are many labels that can fit an NLD, which can fit well or not, but they do not define the individual. A label is a good start into a search about what can help NLD individuals, but as they are all different what works for an individual might not apply to others. Because of the differences, educational plans for NLD are often vague.
Considering NLD a spectrum would be inappropriate, as it is inappropriate for autism. They involve many aspects of behavior, thought, and interaction. Author prefers to consider them as a ballpark, for there is a center but the center spreads in all directions.
NLD is a disability, not just a difference in learning. Preference for disability than just learning differences because with the latter can be demeaning and harmful. Differences are not legally protected, while disabled are. With a disability, more services become available as to their evaluation and finding appropriate education.
More On NLD:
The disability it a non-obvious, for it is about what happens in the mind. There are many with perceptive and obvious disabilities that are more disabling. Being non-obvious causes difficulty in understanding why NLD individuals have difficulties.
Nonverbal communication to an NLD is like talking in a different language. Nonverbal signals are not properly perceived. A neurological impairment that affects abilities, but not related to speech. Common difficulty areas are reading body language and faces, discerning tone, temporal and special memory, and other nonverbal abilities.
Like many with disabilities, NLD individuals can become negatively characterized. Better to avoid making assumptions about intelligence, attention skills, or how similar others are. NLD individuals can fail like everyone to understand something, but that does not mean they are intellectually impaired. NLD tend to have difficult understanding emotions, and tend to look away from people. The nonverbal information can become overwhelming. NLD also tend to be bad at small talk, as they need more substance topics.
What can help NLD is to teach them social skills, for they will not easily pick those up on their own. Many behavior issues are not done on purpose, but are coping mechanisms. NLD are trying to fit in as best they can. TNLD also have difficulty adjusting to novel and complex situations.
Need to recognize strengths, weaknesses, and how to get around difficulties. Different approaches on exist on how to tackle difficulties. Depending on the context will determine which is better.
Caveats?
NLD is usually contrasted with the neuro-typical but it is not clear how neuro-typical individuals perceive things. Even with neuro-typical individuals, they can fail to understand emotions because emotions need practice. A more isolating culture would not provide its members with enough emotional practice making them appear to be NLD. Understanding emotions, like everything else, takes time and effort which later becomes automated.
NLD have a very wide range of symptoms, and behavioral problems. Everyone might fit into the NLD ballpark in some way. Although it would be wrong to make comparisons between the NLD differences, there needs to be a better filter for who is an NLD individual. What this book does is create an understanding of what an NLD is, which can be used to search for more information on how to help NLD individuals.
This is a guide on how to understand and help those with a nonverbal learning disability, an NLD. A nonverbal learning disability is a type of learning disability, which has difficulty with nonverbal communication. Trouble with processing nonverbal information. Those with an NLD are not just different, they are differently different. Different because of the different way information is processed. They think differently.
Nonverbal information such as emotions, body language, and facial expressions are influential factors in communication, but NLD individuals cannot readily understand nonverbal signals. Can take time to process the information, but the pauses can cause misunderstanding. What neuro-typical individuals do automatically, is difficult for an NLD individual.
NLD individuals cannot be generalized, for each is a unique case. Everyone who has an NLD has different problems. NLD individuals tend to think in words, and have trouble integrating nonverbal and verbal information. Can be literal, and have a focus on details. The meaning of nonverbal information needs to be taught.
A Disability:
Being labeled an NLD does not change the individual, it does change how the individual is approached. Being labeled means having more information and can use that information to get help and support. There are many labels that can fit an NLD, which can fit well or not, but they do not define the individual. A label is a good start into a search about what can help NLD individuals, but as they are all different what works for an individual might not apply to others. Because of the differences, educational plans for NLD are often vague.
Considering NLD a spectrum would be inappropriate, as it is inappropriate for autism. They involve many aspects of behavior, thought, and interaction. Author prefers to consider them as a ballpark, for there is a center but the center spreads in all directions.
NLD is a disability, not just a difference in learning. Preference for disability than just learning differences because with the latter can be demeaning and harmful. Differences are not legally protected, while disabled are. With a disability, more services become available as to their evaluation and finding appropriate education.
More On NLD:
The disability it a non-obvious, for it is about what happens in the mind. There are many with perceptive and obvious disabilities that are more disabling. Being non-obvious causes difficulty in understanding why NLD individuals have difficulties.
Nonverbal communication to an NLD is like talking in a different language. Nonverbal signals are not properly perceived. A neurological impairment that affects abilities, but not related to speech. Common difficulty areas are reading body language and faces, discerning tone, temporal and special memory, and other nonverbal abilities.
Like many with disabilities, NLD individuals can become negatively characterized. Better to avoid making assumptions about intelligence, attention skills, or how similar others are. NLD individuals can fail like everyone to understand something, but that does not mean they are intellectually impaired. NLD tend to have difficult understanding emotions, and tend to look away from people. The nonverbal information can become overwhelming. NLD also tend to be bad at small talk, as they need more substance topics.
What can help NLD is to teach them social skills, for they will not easily pick those up on their own. Many behavior issues are not done on purpose, but are coping mechanisms. NLD are trying to fit in as best they can. TNLD also have difficulty adjusting to novel and complex situations.
Need to recognize strengths, weaknesses, and how to get around difficulties. Different approaches on exist on how to tackle difficulties. Depending on the context will determine which is better.
Caveats?
NLD is usually contrasted with the neuro-typical but it is not clear how neuro-typical individuals perceive things. Even with neuro-typical individuals, they can fail to understand emotions because emotions need practice. A more isolating culture would not provide its members with enough emotional practice making them appear to be NLD. Understanding emotions, like everything else, takes time and effort which later becomes automated.
NLD have a very wide range of symptoms, and behavioral problems. Everyone might fit into the NLD ballpark in some way. Although it would be wrong to make comparisons between the NLD differences, there needs to be a better filter for who is an NLD individual. What this book does is create an understanding of what an NLD is, which can be used to search for more information on how to help NLD individuals.
November 21, 2019
Great first hand account of experience life with a Non Verbal Learning Disability. Recommend reading it! I would've given it 5 stars but there are quite a few typos and easily editable errors. Gist of the book is on the last page (and so nicely said): There are some things wrong with me; there are somethings right with me. The things that are wrong don't make me evil, bad, lazy, crazy, or stupid; they make me disabled. The things that are right with me don't make me good, energetic, sane, or smart; they make me gifted. Together, along with a lot of other stuff, they make me Peter [or insert your own name here])."
August 15, 2024
This book bristles with the pitfalls of self-publishing. Has typos, spellos and sentences that contradict themselves or don't make sense. When I ordered the book, I was happy the author had a Ph.D., since I thought his info would be more sophisticated than the average person speaking of life experience. Then he lets it out that his Ph.D. is in statistics. And that he diagnosed himself. In the interest of full disclosure I should let it out that I did not finish the book. People who self-publish a book - I would think they would hire an editor and a proofreader. Don't you want your book to look like a finished book instead of a draft?
October 18, 2020
Kindle version had lots of typos but information was invaluable.
July 29, 2023
A thorough little read about NLD - I appreciated the personal accounts too.
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