Of War & Weddings; A Legacy of Two Fathers

by Jerry Yellin

This edition of Of War and Weddings is O ut of Print , but is currently available under a new title, Jerry's Last Mission , now available on Amazon

288 pages, Paperback

First published March 1, 1995

Reviews

[David · Rating 5 out of 5]

This true story of a WWII American fighter pilot was very engaging and hard to put down. While flying many combat missions in the Pacific against the Japanese Jerry Yellin developed a hatred for the Japanese that stayed with him long after the end of the war. It was only after his youngest son moved to Japan to teach English and subsequently met and decided to marry a Japanese girl that Jerry had to come to grips with the hatred he had been carrying inside. That the girl's father had served in the Japanese military made it even harder for him. But after several visits to meet and get to know her family, Jerry's heart began to soften and he came to love Japan and its people. He was also able to have difficult conversations with her father about the war and help create a bridge between former enemies.

[Daniel Simmons · Rating 4 out of 5]

Vising the War in the Pacific National Park HQ building in Guam earlier this week, I asked the park official at the gift shop if there were any books about the war that she could recommend in particular. She wasted no time in snatching a slim blue-colored volume from the groaning shelf of titles behind her and pressing it into my hands. "Oh, I love THIS book," she said, adding that she'd bought several copies for friends over the years. "It's more about peace than about war, though." Imagine my surprise when I discovered that the book's author was the father of a Kyoto-based friend of mine. I have heard Jerry Yellin's name many times but had never investigated the details of his life. This book -- which I devoured in one sitting -- changed all that, and its final pages left me feeling optimistic about humanity's capacity for healing, for forgiveness, and for pushing forward in spite of past rancor.

Yellin's book weaves together two primary narratives, as its title suggests: one is about his wartime experiences in the Pacific theatre and the other is about his postwar rapprochement with the Japanese, as he learns to embrace his former enemies when his youngest son moves to Japan and decides to marry there.

Yellin is unafraid to ask tough questions not only of his Japanese counterparts but of himself. That introspection, and his willingness to reach across the intercultural divide and include voices other than his own, transforms what might have been a typical war memoir into a searching dialogue about what drives people apart and, more importantly, about what brings them back together.

As such, it offers good lessons for our time, or for any time.

[Reid M. · Rating 5 out of 5]

The amazing legacy of a great American warrior, who learned how to make peace with himself and his enemies.
Captain Jerry Yellin was committed to serving his country as a fighter pilot against the Japanese during WWII. After serving in the Pacific he came home only to find himself restless and unable to hold a job. This book takes us through the real life struggles of an authentic American warrior. How can Capt. Yellin make peace with himself decades after returning from WWII, after witnessing the horrors of war firsthand? How can Jerry Yellin make peace with his enemies when confronted with very personal choices? One of his sons falls in love with a Japanese woman while teaching in Japan, and they decide to marry. This is the journey of a warrior coming to terms with his divergent realities. Later in his journey through life, Jerry Yellin helped many veterans with PTSD through his books and book signings, lectures, speeches, interviews, and videos. He served not only America, but his fellow veterans, with honor, dignity and courage. This book reinforces many important life lessons. We are all on this planet for a short time and must learn to live together.
Capt. Jerry Yellin was stationed on Iwo Jima, and flew the last bombing mission over Japan during WWII. His wingman, a close friend, was lost on that mission, and was likely the last casualty of the War. His wingman happened to be the great uncle of actress Scarlet Johansson. Watch the YouTube video with her and Capt. Yellin, then read the book.

[Kit Crumpton · Rating 5 out of 5]

If you are interested in WWII this is a great read. I loved the depth of Jerry Yellin’s story. The book starts out with his own experiences as a P-51 pilot during WWII and ends up several years later when his youngest son marries a Japanese woman in Japan.
Just a bit of history: The last year of WWII, 1945, saw the end of Nazi Germany and American forces fighting the last foe, the Japanese – on their own turf. B-29 Supefortresses would fly from the Marianas islands (Guam, Tinian and Saipan) to bomb Japan. The P-51’s would escort the B-29’s and also strafe Japan independently from Iwo Jima.
My dad flew the B-29’s on these bombing missions during the same time Jerry Yellin flew his P-51’s. Gives he goose bumps thinking of the possibility that Jerry may have escorted my dad to target. So, Jerry’s story is personal.
The beginning of this book describes some of his missions and how many of his friends died during combat. Osaka was a mission that struck me most because of the bad weather. My dad experienced that too.
The second portion of Jerry’s book goes into self-reflection and difficult discussions with folks who were once his enemy. This book is about that prickly journey in reconciling the past and welcoming the future with open hearts. This is a story of healing and hope.

[Frederic Martin · Rating 5 out of 5]

I will start with a disclaimer. My father was a squadron mate of Jerry Yellin's. That being said, to be able to read an extremely well-written account of what my father and Jerry went through on Iwo Jima is a precious gift for anyone who has had a relative or friend experience war and all the emotions and stereotyping and hatred and sorrow followed by introspection and healing that they go through. It is common for veterans, especially of WWII, to put it "all behind them" and not drag the extreme stress of that period into their post-war lives. It was certainly the case with my father but with the reading of "Of War & Weddings" I gained insight and it opened a conversation with Dad that I value beyond measure. I think this book opens conversations that are valuable in any time period and certainly in this one when so much hatred and division and false information is being distributed without any means of accountability. My advice: turn off your social media, buy a print copy of this book, find your most comfortable reading spot, and absorb. Don't worry about the outcome, because it is a good one, and hopeful.

[MrsWhiteLibrary · Rating 5 out of 5]

While it took me a little while to work my way through this book, I’m really glad I stuck it out. I haven’t read much about the Pacific War, so learning more about it was great. But even more so I appreciated the way Jerry and his once-enemy are able to reconcile hate from the past and also converse about it with such deep understanding. I love that neither needed to be the victim. Instead, they were able to acknowledge the many shared aspects of their experiences and the unfortunate, but seemingly unavoidable pitfalls of our human state and the fallibility of leaders that sadly leads to losses of life. I wish people today could be so gracious in such conversations, rather than self-focused and trying to one-up each other in victimhood.

As I don’t share Jerry’s or his family’s and friends’ perspectives on religion, I found that aspect a little sad, but overall still a valuable read both historically and culturally. I enjoyed learning about Japanese culture and habits as Jerry shared his journey of exploring their culture.

[RoseMary author · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is the remarkable story of how a World War II Veteran of the Pacific makes peace with the nation and people of Japan decades after the war.

Jerry Yellin was a captain and fighter pilot going on many missions throughout the Pacific and over Japan. He is the last fighter pilot to fly a combat mission as the war was coming to a close.

When his youngest son decides to move to Japan, the door begins to open on pushed down memories and emotions that Mr. Yellin eventually, bravely, digs into, shares, and overcomes.

This journey includes multiple trips to Japan with his much-loved wife, Helene, as they explore their son’s adopted country and meet his fiancé. Along with meeting her is the all-encompassing gathering of family and friends. The honesty in the conversations Mr. Yellin has with the Japanese people he meets—both veterans and much younger folks—can flatten you. Their desire to understand each other is a lesson we can take to heart and apply in our own lives.

Mr. Yellin is a strong man who bares his soul in an effort, a successful effort, to push beyond the boundaries he has lived with for years and come through a broader, larger person on the other side.

The stories that interweave into one narrative are well-written, and although the theme of forgiveness and reconciliation is strong, there is no tone of preaching or sermonizing. There simply is the revelation of a life starting anew because of his son’s choices and Mr. Yellin’s own.

Note: We met Captain Jerry Yellin at the World War II Anniversary events at Fort DeRussy in December. Pop over to MusingsFromaRedhead to read about that and the pleasure of meeting so many of our Veterans.

[Vickie Dee · Rating 5 out of 5]

Great nonfiction story showing the culture clash between the American fighter pilot and his Japanese "enemy" and how they overcome their differences to become a family. I listened tp this on audio - excellent narrator.