Learning to Live without Violence: A Handbook for Men

by Daniel Jay Sonkin, Michael Durphy

A Handbook for Men. Used by counselors and therapists across the country . . . especially for the court-ordered perpetrator. Starting in the early 1980s, "Learning To Live Without A Handbook For Men" set the standard for the treatment of batterers. Provides techniques and suggestions to hep men in the continuation of their journey away from violence, fear and anxiety. "Learning To Live Without Violence" is the anger avoidance workbook helping thousands of readers to overcome domestic violence. "Learning To Live Without Violence" is a compendium of tools and exercises that can be used independently or in the context of a counseling program. --Midwest Book Review

144 pages, Paperback

First published March 1, 1984

Reviews

[Shannon · Rating 3 out of 5]

Good book, however it could use a bit of clarity in some areas. Some members of the target audience might not know the difference between directing anger and assertive communication. The difference is an essential one to learn and which the book doesn't communicate well. Another issue, though not perhaps with the book itself, is that it does not distinguish between primary and secondary emotions. Some anger management programs do, some do not. For those that do this book will confuse everyone following at multiple times. And while this book does well in some regards to explain anger to an audience that primarily uses anger in situations, it is suited for the introverted intellectual type. Those types in group seem to follow it well and wrestle with the themes. The fast paced type-A sort generally finds this book a chore to get through and they don't get it. Better examples are needed for them in their language. Examples on how to fill out the journals within the workbook, and so on. I guess I'm trying to say 'write in more than one voice' in order to make it more understandable to those outside of the author's who are forced to attend a DV class, who might feel confusing emotions themselves, trapped in gender schemas, and who have no reason to buy-in to either the program or the book. We've got our end covered, but the book could work on its approach to the above problem.

[Jon]

Indispensable tool for men trying to lead non-violent lives. I'm in a men's group that uses this book as a guide for discussions about how to make ourselves and others safe.