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Mom, Dad...Can We Talk?: Helping our Aging Parents with the Insight and Wisdom of Others
Mom, Dad...Can We Talk? is for the tens of millions of people dealing with concerns for aging parents. It is controversial, sometimes humorous, often poignant, encouraging -- and always helpful.
The book is rich with stories of adult children who have been challenged and rewarded in this final stage of the parent-child relationship. It includes tips for initiating caring conversations "Mom, we're worried about you living alone." "Sis, I need your help with all this." And, "Dad has a lady friend!"
There are also helpful hints on how to understand and manage the realities of dementia, drinking, depression, and driving.
In this newly revised edition, Guest Contributors address new topics helping grandchildren understand their aging grandparent; helping families with aging parents who have a special needs adult child; and, adapting to the complications imposed by the sudden intrusion of a reality like a pandemic. Also included is a new Discussion Guide as a bonus! Mom, Dad...Can We Talk? is the how-to book you need to help successfully manage these challenging times in family life.
The book is rich with stories of adult children who have been challenged and rewarded in this final stage of the parent-child relationship. It includes tips for initiating caring conversations "Mom, we're worried about you living alone." "Sis, I need your help with all this." And, "Dad has a lady friend!"
There are also helpful hints on how to understand and manage the realities of dementia, drinking, depression, and driving.
In this newly revised edition, Guest Contributors address new topics helping grandchildren understand their aging grandparent; helping families with aging parents who have a special needs adult child; and, adapting to the complications imposed by the sudden intrusion of a reality like a pandemic. Also included is a new Discussion Guide as a bonus! Mom, Dad...Can We Talk? is the how-to book you need to help successfully manage these challenging times in family life.
146 pages, Paperback
Published January 29, 2021
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33 people want to read
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Displaying 1 - 12 of 12 reviews
February 20, 2021
What can you expect when your parents draw near to their later years? Are there any waypoints that can help you navigate this period and keep it from becoming a dark time in your relationship older parents? Dick Edwards draws from decades of experience in eldercare and shares it with the reading public in this 146-page softback. The book originally surfaced in March 2009, and I wrote a review in 2013. This edition has been revised with three new, important chapters and is just as valuable as I said it was in 2013, and more! It is written for folks from all walks of life, and is a solid resource.
"Mom, Dad...Can We Talk?" unfolds in eighteen short chapters that cover a number of subjects. Some chapters prepare readers for what is before them, and how it may affect them. Others talk about family dynamics, the ways these play out, and how siblings can learn to communicate with one another, especially between those who are giving immediate care and those who are at a geographical distance. A few sections present ideas on how to address sensitive issues with their older parents, as well as suggestions on how to make these final years rich with memories. One chapter introduces how to talk with your children to help them as their grandparents age. And another takes on the significant ways a pandemic, with all the social distancing, quarantining, and limited family engagement can impact aging parents, and ideas on what to do. Truly the book "looks at roles and relationships among family members. It acknowledges and respects family history to help gauge present-day expectations. It identifies areas of potential difficulty as well as areas of potential pleasure. It asks you to stop and think, to anticipate, and to start the conversations with your parents and those who care for them" (12). Some chapters may well bring you to tears, as they did me. Others will lift your spirits. And several will get the wheels turning in your head and heart.
My wife and I read this book a few years ago and have found the insights and suggestions deeply meaningful. They helped us navigate a few minefields and have given us a good sense of how we can be a better son and daughter during this new season. As a Christian minister, I have recommended and handed out the earlier edition of this book a number of times to parishioners who now find themselves with older parents. I even have several on our church book table for easy access. I now look forward to sharing the revised edition. I think it might also be a good book for older parents to read so they can begin looking at their last years through a healthier perspective where they can make this season in life a more memorable and pleasurable time for the adult children. I simply cannot recommend this book enough! Snatch up a copy for yourself and all of your siblings, read it, mark it up, talk to each other about the chapters, and begin preparing for the adventures ahead. You will rejoice that you did!
My appreciation goes out to the publisher who asked if I’d be willing to look at the revised edition. At my assent, they sent me the electronic version used for this review. They made no stipulations or demands. Therefore this analysis and evaluation is mine, freely made and freely given.
"Mom, Dad...Can We Talk?" unfolds in eighteen short chapters that cover a number of subjects. Some chapters prepare readers for what is before them, and how it may affect them. Others talk about family dynamics, the ways these play out, and how siblings can learn to communicate with one another, especially between those who are giving immediate care and those who are at a geographical distance. A few sections present ideas on how to address sensitive issues with their older parents, as well as suggestions on how to make these final years rich with memories. One chapter introduces how to talk with your children to help them as their grandparents age. And another takes on the significant ways a pandemic, with all the social distancing, quarantining, and limited family engagement can impact aging parents, and ideas on what to do. Truly the book "looks at roles and relationships among family members. It acknowledges and respects family history to help gauge present-day expectations. It identifies areas of potential difficulty as well as areas of potential pleasure. It asks you to stop and think, to anticipate, and to start the conversations with your parents and those who care for them" (12). Some chapters may well bring you to tears, as they did me. Others will lift your spirits. And several will get the wheels turning in your head and heart.
My wife and I read this book a few years ago and have found the insights and suggestions deeply meaningful. They helped us navigate a few minefields and have given us a good sense of how we can be a better son and daughter during this new season. As a Christian minister, I have recommended and handed out the earlier edition of this book a number of times to parishioners who now find themselves with older parents. I even have several on our church book table for easy access. I now look forward to sharing the revised edition. I think it might also be a good book for older parents to read so they can begin looking at their last years through a healthier perspective where they can make this season in life a more memorable and pleasurable time for the adult children. I simply cannot recommend this book enough! Snatch up a copy for yourself and all of your siblings, read it, mark it up, talk to each other about the chapters, and begin preparing for the adventures ahead. You will rejoice that you did!
My appreciation goes out to the publisher who asked if I’d be willing to look at the revised edition. At my assent, they sent me the electronic version used for this review. They made no stipulations or demands. Therefore this analysis and evaluation is mine, freely made and freely given.
February 3, 2021
Dick Edwards’ ‘Mom, Dad...Can We Talk?’ is an anecdote-driven ‘how-to’ guide aimed at assisting anyone struggling with 'end-of-life' care-decisions for their aging parents.
Drawing upon his years of experience as the Mayo Clinic’s renowned Retirement Living Community Administrator located in Rochester, Minnesota, Edwards tackles this incredibly difficult topic from all angles. Over the course of this text, the author outlines a comprehensive approach for managing an aging parent's needs, from understanding how to recognize when help is needed to offering strategies for discussing the decline of a loved one with family and freinds.
Over the course of some eighteen chapters, Edwards methodically approaches every facet of the aging-parent/child relationship dynamic, from dealing with depression, and dementia to the ever-complicated topic of assisted-living, with an impressively compassionate touch. The man clearly knows his stuff and speaks from an informed perspective, backed by a lifetime of personal and professional experience.
While impeccably researched, this text is also incredibly approachable—the sort of book that can be ready by both grandchildren and grandparents alike. In addition to the original text, this revised version also includes a timely, ‘pandemic-themed’ chapter as well as a bonus discussion guide, all of which makes this a worthwhile release.
According to Edwards, ‘Mom, Dad...Can We Talk?’ is meant for the “tens of millions of people dealing with concerns for aging parents,” but chances are, at some point or another, just about anyone would benefit from reading this book.
Drawing upon his years of experience as the Mayo Clinic’s renowned Retirement Living Community Administrator located in Rochester, Minnesota, Edwards tackles this incredibly difficult topic from all angles. Over the course of this text, the author outlines a comprehensive approach for managing an aging parent's needs, from understanding how to recognize when help is needed to offering strategies for discussing the decline of a loved one with family and freinds.
Over the course of some eighteen chapters, Edwards methodically approaches every facet of the aging-parent/child relationship dynamic, from dealing with depression, and dementia to the ever-complicated topic of assisted-living, with an impressively compassionate touch. The man clearly knows his stuff and speaks from an informed perspective, backed by a lifetime of personal and professional experience.
While impeccably researched, this text is also incredibly approachable—the sort of book that can be ready by both grandchildren and grandparents alike. In addition to the original text, this revised version also includes a timely, ‘pandemic-themed’ chapter as well as a bonus discussion guide, all of which makes this a worthwhile release.
According to Edwards, ‘Mom, Dad...Can We Talk?’ is meant for the “tens of millions of people dealing with concerns for aging parents,” but chances are, at some point or another, just about anyone would benefit from reading this book.
March 4, 2021
A mix of sage advice and sharp insights, retired Mayo Clinic Eldercare Specialist Edwards’s compelling guide on caring for aging parents is a must-read for all adult children who want to prepare themselves for the mentally and physically strenuous challenge head on.
With great insight and empathy, Edwards guides the reader through the aging and probability of long-term parental care. He thoroughly addresses the subject, covering various topics such as dementia, depression, drinking, loss of independence, managing finances, healthcare decisions, home maintenance, errands, and family communication among others.
He conveys the usually taboo and sobering topic of parents’ death with perception and heaps of sensitivity. The narrative is fluid, the prose lively, and Edwards’s frank approach is straightforward and compassionate at once, making for an intimate reading experience.
Despite the sobering tone of the subject matter, the reader will come away feeling prepared for the challenge. The use of blocked quote boxes and charts complement the accessibility of the text, and a heap of real-life examples add to the authenticity.
This invaluable, beautifully written guide is sure to become required reading for anyone with an elderly parent needing long-term care.
With great insight and empathy, Edwards guides the reader through the aging and probability of long-term parental care. He thoroughly addresses the subject, covering various topics such as dementia, depression, drinking, loss of independence, managing finances, healthcare decisions, home maintenance, errands, and family communication among others.
He conveys the usually taboo and sobering topic of parents’ death with perception and heaps of sensitivity. The narrative is fluid, the prose lively, and Edwards’s frank approach is straightforward and compassionate at once, making for an intimate reading experience.
Despite the sobering tone of the subject matter, the reader will come away feeling prepared for the challenge. The use of blocked quote boxes and charts complement the accessibility of the text, and a heap of real-life examples add to the authenticity.
This invaluable, beautifully written guide is sure to become required reading for anyone with an elderly parent needing long-term care.
February 15, 2021
Wow. This book. In the summary, it says: "It is controversial, sometimes humorous, often poignant, encouraging -- and always helpful." --and I truly found it to be all that and more. It was instructive, accessible, comprehensive, and compassionate. It covered questions that I didn't even realize I had and gave examples of situations I couldn't have imagined but found them helpful and instructive. The added input of people with knowledge and expertise on various situations was incredibly helpful, and it allowed for a wider net of readers to find this book useful.
It is very clear who this book is meant for, but I really believe that it would be a valuable read for anyone who finds themselves in a position of caring for others be them elderly, disabled, etc. This book will help navigate many types of conversations and situations that aren't strictly limited to the aging population. I also think that this book comes at an important time in our world, what with the pandemic and the uncertain future of elderly care.
A wonderful and insightful read with so much care and aid.
It is very clear who this book is meant for, but I really believe that it would be a valuable read for anyone who finds themselves in a position of caring for others be them elderly, disabled, etc. This book will help navigate many types of conversations and situations that aren't strictly limited to the aging population. I also think that this book comes at an important time in our world, what with the pandemic and the uncertain future of elderly care.
A wonderful and insightful read with so much care and aid.
March 3, 2021
With great insight and empathy, Edwards, Retired Mayo Clinic Eldercare Specialist, shares his sage advice on taking care of older parents and how to handle everything that goes along with the dramatic life transition.
Covering everything from how to initiate a conversation with your parents about the situation to managing finances and healthcare, and navigating serious physical illness to dementia, depression, and drinking, Edwards educates readers about how to make informed decisions about elder care.
He frequently draws from the experience of adult children, who have journeyed with their parents through their later years and offers intelligent advice on handling the onset of old age with understanding and sensitivity.
Edwards’s real-life examples with reassuring personal testimonies, fluid narrative, and accessible, crisp prose brings a fresh perspective to the elder care handbook catalogue. Informative and impassioned, this is an excellent resource for adult children.
Covering everything from how to initiate a conversation with your parents about the situation to managing finances and healthcare, and navigating serious physical illness to dementia, depression, and drinking, Edwards educates readers about how to make informed decisions about elder care.
He frequently draws from the experience of adult children, who have journeyed with their parents through their later years and offers intelligent advice on handling the onset of old age with understanding and sensitivity.
Edwards’s real-life examples with reassuring personal testimonies, fluid narrative, and accessible, crisp prose brings a fresh perspective to the elder care handbook catalogue. Informative and impassioned, this is an excellent resource for adult children.
March 17, 2021
A very interesting and helpful reading
It is crucial is to communicate anything to somebody, either a good or bad issue. With this book called “Mom, Dad…Can we talk?” I confirmed it, in this case, that is important to express and talk to people whenever a problem comes up. Dick Edward has penned a concise but excellent book in which I could find answers to some queries that I had. There are different topics worth reading about, such as depression, dementia, drinking and the most important one, from my standpoint, ageing parents, or grandparents. Experiences of other people are included in this helpful book. All in all, I believe that it is a highly recommended book for anyone who is going through some of these topics.
It is crucial is to communicate anything to somebody, either a good or bad issue. With this book called “Mom, Dad…Can we talk?” I confirmed it, in this case, that is important to express and talk to people whenever a problem comes up. Dick Edward has penned a concise but excellent book in which I could find answers to some queries that I had. There are different topics worth reading about, such as depression, dementia, drinking and the most important one, from my standpoint, ageing parents, or grandparents. Experiences of other people are included in this helpful book. All in all, I believe that it is a highly recommended book for anyone who is going through some of these topics.
March 18, 2021
Dick Edwards’ story touched and inspired me in ways I could have never imagined. His honesty and vulnerability are on every page, and he had me in tears of joy, celebrating the deep healing of this transformative book.
I loved the author's writing style, it felt natural, just as if I were having a conversation in person with him. It felt authentic and it even had me more than glued in some chapters. It was the book I needed; it was refreshing and encouraging and I enjoyed the scriptures that also connected the dots in experiences I have had myself.
There are a lot of life circumstances inside about parents and children relationships. I could walk away with so many favorite quotes and guidance from this book.
Loved this masterpiece and I really recommend it!
March 20, 2021
Our parents have taken care of us, their children, most of our lives. However, it comes a time, when they grow older and it is our task to look after them. In my personal experience, I recognize that there can be very hard moments until they realize they need help and accept ours. Physical and mental problems add an extra share of worries, problems and difficulties. “Mom, Dad...Can we talk?” written by Dick Edwards answers all the questions that arise during this arduous process of acceptance and adjustment in ours and our elderly parents’ lives. The author describes different situations, illustrated by true stories, and provides advice on how to face and solve them. This is a very interesting and useful guide. I recommend it.
February 8, 2021
This book is a comprehensive and sensitive guide to prepare adult children for their parents aging and the eventual loss. It covers a lot of ground; from the care of aging parents, to grief and everything in-between, with lots of useful advice and examples of how to approach difficult subjects with your parents and the rest of your family.
May 22, 2021
Wow very insightful on ways to deal with your parents as they age. This was a book that I kinda needed now in my life to help me to help my parents with current life. This book would be more feasible for the middle age adult dealing with older parents around retirement age is who I suggest this for to help bridge that gap of knowledge.
July 29, 2021
Great book
Great insight on how to have that talk with aging parents, How to deal with things that will come up.I really enjoyed and found it very useful
Great insight on how to have that talk with aging parents, How to deal with things that will come up.I really enjoyed and found it very useful
March 21, 2024
Good info for all
Liked the suggestions and the insight. Will help with the future as well as now. Highly recommend. Will remember to keep for future reference.
Liked the suggestions and the insight. Will help with the future as well as now. Highly recommend. Will remember to keep for future reference.
Displaying 1 - 12 of 12 reviews