What do you think?
Rate this book
Surrender: A Love Letter to My Daughter
"I am the lucky one. My child is not dead."
It was new for CNN and their audiences, another sad story about the opioid crisis in America and a good-hearted policeman, but it was a five-year reality for me and mine.
"Picking Up the A Mother"s Journey Through Addiction" Article featured on MariaShriver.com
A painful but beautifully conveyed tale of addiction and a mother’s commitment to a floundering child.” – Kirkus Reviews
"Alpert's memoir is filled with love and compassion as it confronts the struggles of being a family member to an addict; it suggests a path forward to families under similar duress." – Foreword Reviews Clarion 5 out of 5
“It is a page-turner that will bring tears of joy and pain to readers' eyes. The emotion is raw and gives credibility to this book. A Love Letter To My Daughter is bold, engaging and very inspiring. Highly recommended.” – Readers’ Favorite Review
“My hope is that if you are reading this book, you will gain an insight into what addiction can do to a family.”– Scottie Collins, CEO Savant Healthcare Systems
"On December 1st, 2017, Lou Alpert woke to a CNN story featuring images of her daughter Crystal shooting up heroin in an alley, visibly pregnant and being confronted by an Albuquerque policeman. Within twenty-four hours, the story had gone viral, picked up by media outlets worldwide. Subsequent coverage television interviews, news articles, and an appearance at Trump's State of the Union address by the policeman, his wife, and Crystal's adopted daughter.
A Love Letter to My Daughter gives voice to the truth of one mother's journey through her child's heroin addiction. Delivered with honesty and insight, Lou shares her lived wisdom with a rare mixture of candor, humor, compassion, and love. This book is for anyone who has found themselves swept up in the opioid crisis, hiding in the shadows, and trying to cope with the chaos of loving an addict.
It was new for CNN and their audiences, another sad story about the opioid crisis in America and a good-hearted policeman, but it was a five-year reality for me and mine.
"Picking Up the A Mother"s Journey Through Addiction" Article featured on MariaShriver.com
A painful but beautifully conveyed tale of addiction and a mother’s commitment to a floundering child.” – Kirkus Reviews
"Alpert's memoir is filled with love and compassion as it confronts the struggles of being a family member to an addict; it suggests a path forward to families under similar duress." – Foreword Reviews Clarion 5 out of 5
“It is a page-turner that will bring tears of joy and pain to readers' eyes. The emotion is raw and gives credibility to this book. A Love Letter To My Daughter is bold, engaging and very inspiring. Highly recommended.” – Readers’ Favorite Review
“My hope is that if you are reading this book, you will gain an insight into what addiction can do to a family.”– Scottie Collins, CEO Savant Healthcare Systems
"On December 1st, 2017, Lou Alpert woke to a CNN story featuring images of her daughter Crystal shooting up heroin in an alley, visibly pregnant and being confronted by an Albuquerque policeman. Within twenty-four hours, the story had gone viral, picked up by media outlets worldwide. Subsequent coverage television interviews, news articles, and an appearance at Trump's State of the Union address by the policeman, his wife, and Crystal's adopted daughter.
A Love Letter to My Daughter gives voice to the truth of one mother's journey through her child's heroin addiction. Delivered with honesty and insight, Lou shares her lived wisdom with a rare mixture of candor, humor, compassion, and love. This book is for anyone who has found themselves swept up in the opioid crisis, hiding in the shadows, and trying to cope with the chaos of loving an addict.
228 pages, Paperback
Published April 18, 2019
3 people are currently reading
24 people want to read
Ratings & Reviews
Friends & Following
Create a free account to discover what your friends think of this book!
Community Reviews
Displaying 1 - 11 of 11 reviews
May 25, 2020
The cover tattoo really caught my eye on this one, as well as the name of the author. I assumed that the author was related to the famous trumpeter, leader of the Tijuana Brass and co-founder of A & M Records, Herb Alpert. I was wrong!
This is a memoir written by adoptive mother Lou Alpert about the daughter she adopted at the age of 15, Crystal Champ. Crystal had already been adopted at birth by another family who were very strict and religious. Lou first met Crystal when she was dating her godson. Crystal's adoptive parents basically put all Crystal's belongings outside of the house and kicked her out. That's when Lou took Crystal in. Lou already had 8 other children, but her heart was large enough to embrace another child into the family. Things had been going very well, in fact Crystal was Homecoming Queen in high school and graduated college. However, once Crystal was an adult she became a heroin addict, shooting up.
At this point Lou was divorced and her other kids were adults living their own lives. Lou worked mainly as a real estate agent, but often worked other jobs as well. I was amazed at all the money Lou was continually spending to support Crystal while she was off on her addiction spree. Lou paid for hotel rooms and a multitude of cellphones and storage facilities. Some of the dialogue in the book is a recounting of text messages between Crystal and Lou, or with other friends of Crystal that Lou would keep in touch with when she couldn't track down Crystal. The "new normal" of Lou's life being a parent of a heroin addict on the run was a very sobering read. Lou would be with a client and suddenly have to take calls from Crystal. Lou was very honest about the dire situation with her adopted daughter when she had to make time to step out for these calls. She also maintained a sense of humor and wished that people would just be good listeners rather than try to give advice.
Lou fought hard to get Crystal into rehab. It's incredibly expensive. Crystal's first go round in drug rehab was government funded due to her poverty status. Crystal wound up having a daughter with her boyfriend Jim. When Crystal relapsed on heroin, Jim took their daughter Sage and moved back in with his parents to keep the child safe and away from Crystal. Lou was very involved with Sage as a grandparent, spending time with her most weekends. In some ways, it assuaged the sorrow brought about by Crystal.
Then one morning Lou had been watching a cable news network when she was horrified to see a news report involving Crystal. Crystal was heavily pregnant, sitting in an alley in the act of shooting up heroin. What actually happened was a young police officer had happened upon this very sad situation, and convinced Crystal to go into rehab. Crystal was provided a rehab experience worth $100,000 in Florida where the residents work with horses. Incredibly, the police officer and his wife also adopted Crystal's baby girl. In fact, they were guests at the State of the Union Address in 2018, because of their inspiring story.
The culmination of the book involves Lou's inner turmoil after all she went through to support Crystal emotionally and financially over the 5 years of her heroin addiction. It overtook Lou's life to such a degree, and it was hard coming to terms with the fact that after everything she did for Crystal, it took some police officer in Florida to get all the credit for Crystal's recovery. In addition, there were follow-up reports on that cable station, but nothing was ever mentioned about all that Lou did for her daughter to try to help. Some might say, "Hey, just be happy your daughter got clean!" But when you read about all Lou did for Crystal, it's understandable for her to have all kinds of conflicting emotions to work through.
Lou has a very nice and free flowing writing style which I enjoyed. It was a quick read. Crystal closes out the book in the last chapter. Her writing style is a bit more complex and intellectual sounding. If she was the one writing the book, I wouldn't enjoy it as much. All in all, this was a very good offering to depict what a family goes through having a drug addicted family member.
You can still find the videos online of Crystal Champ from the cable news station that featured her story.
Thank you to Hybrid Global Publishing for providing an advance reader copy via Edelweiss.
This is a memoir written by adoptive mother Lou Alpert about the daughter she adopted at the age of 15, Crystal Champ. Crystal had already been adopted at birth by another family who were very strict and religious. Lou first met Crystal when she was dating her godson. Crystal's adoptive parents basically put all Crystal's belongings outside of the house and kicked her out. That's when Lou took Crystal in. Lou already had 8 other children, but her heart was large enough to embrace another child into the family. Things had been going very well, in fact Crystal was Homecoming Queen in high school and graduated college. However, once Crystal was an adult she became a heroin addict, shooting up.
At this point Lou was divorced and her other kids were adults living their own lives. Lou worked mainly as a real estate agent, but often worked other jobs as well. I was amazed at all the money Lou was continually spending to support Crystal while she was off on her addiction spree. Lou paid for hotel rooms and a multitude of cellphones and storage facilities. Some of the dialogue in the book is a recounting of text messages between Crystal and Lou, or with other friends of Crystal that Lou would keep in touch with when she couldn't track down Crystal. The "new normal" of Lou's life being a parent of a heroin addict on the run was a very sobering read. Lou would be with a client and suddenly have to take calls from Crystal. Lou was very honest about the dire situation with her adopted daughter when she had to make time to step out for these calls. She also maintained a sense of humor and wished that people would just be good listeners rather than try to give advice.
Lou fought hard to get Crystal into rehab. It's incredibly expensive. Crystal's first go round in drug rehab was government funded due to her poverty status. Crystal wound up having a daughter with her boyfriend Jim. When Crystal relapsed on heroin, Jim took their daughter Sage and moved back in with his parents to keep the child safe and away from Crystal. Lou was very involved with Sage as a grandparent, spending time with her most weekends. In some ways, it assuaged the sorrow brought about by Crystal.
Then one morning Lou had been watching a cable news network when she was horrified to see a news report involving Crystal. Crystal was heavily pregnant, sitting in an alley in the act of shooting up heroin. What actually happened was a young police officer had happened upon this very sad situation, and convinced Crystal to go into rehab. Crystal was provided a rehab experience worth $100,000 in Florida where the residents work with horses. Incredibly, the police officer and his wife also adopted Crystal's baby girl. In fact, they were guests at the State of the Union Address in 2018, because of their inspiring story.
The culmination of the book involves Lou's inner turmoil after all she went through to support Crystal emotionally and financially over the 5 years of her heroin addiction. It overtook Lou's life to such a degree, and it was hard coming to terms with the fact that after everything she did for Crystal, it took some police officer in Florida to get all the credit for Crystal's recovery. In addition, there were follow-up reports on that cable station, but nothing was ever mentioned about all that Lou did for her daughter to try to help. Some might say, "Hey, just be happy your daughter got clean!" But when you read about all Lou did for Crystal, it's understandable for her to have all kinds of conflicting emotions to work through.
Lou has a very nice and free flowing writing style which I enjoyed. It was a quick read. Crystal closes out the book in the last chapter. Her writing style is a bit more complex and intellectual sounding. If she was the one writing the book, I wouldn't enjoy it as much. All in all, this was a very good offering to depict what a family goes through having a drug addicted family member.
You can still find the videos online of Crystal Champ from the cable news station that featured her story.
Thank you to Hybrid Global Publishing for providing an advance reader copy via Edelweiss.
March 15, 2020
This book is both enlightening and painful to read, as Alpert details what it is like being the mother of an addict, using a series of text messages interspersed with her observations. Even though she already had 7 children, she took in the teenage Crystal when her parents threw her out. Crystal seemed to be doing well as she became homecoming queen and went to college, but things went downhill and she became addicted to heroin and meth. Alpert sent her money, bought her phones, and offered to pay for rehab, but in hindsight she says she was just an enabler, that she was helping a manipulative addict instead of the Crystal she remembered. At the end of the book, the author succinctly sums up what she’s learned: Parents are enablers; we can’t fix our addicts; addicts break the hearts of those who love them; you cannot force your addict to get clean; having an addict in your life is isolating; addiction is a disease; people judge; and you can’t go back, and must let go.
There is an afterward by Crystal, who is now in recovery. Quoting Marcel Proust, she has come to the realization that “we don’t receive wisdom; we must discover it for ourselves after a journey that no one can take for us, or spare us.”
Thanks to Edelweiss and to the publisher for this ARC.
There is an afterward by Crystal, who is now in recovery. Quoting Marcel Proust, she has come to the realization that “we don’t receive wisdom; we must discover it for ourselves after a journey that no one can take for us, or spare us.”
Thanks to Edelweiss and to the publisher for this ARC.
April 22, 2019
‘The positive side of impermanence is that everything is possible’
Texas author Lou Alpert has provided one of the more sensitive books about the many, and often unspoken or recognized, aspects of addiction. The Preface to the book is written by a former addict, Scottie Collins, who speaks from his experience both as an addict and as one who has recovered and helps other addicts and their families. It makes for a powerful opening.
The book carefully describes the impact of addiction on both addicts and families of addicts – an especially timely topic in this current epidemic of opioid addiction that this country is experiencing. Because the story is related to the mother of a heroin addict, the veracity of the information is far more real than many other books about addiction. Lou begins her story (and her story is also her adopted daughter Crystal’s story) with a CNN broadcast making visual the pathetic Crystal shooting up heroin in an alley in Albuquerque, New Mexico. With that stunning beginning she traces Crystal’s life as a heroin addict, a five year history of her daughter’s dependency on heroin, her failed attempts at rehab, two pregnancies and homelessness – all related with an honesty of the agonies that represents.
Lou is a tech savvy mother and that factor makes her ability to reveal all the permutations of both addiction and response to addiction with an immediacy that intensifies the horrors: the availability of instant information and imagery and resources from the Internet has rarely been so central to an author’s writing. But in addition to Lou’s detailing Crystal’s life responses, the real impact of this book is Lou’s revealing her own co-dependency. ‘I compartmentalized my emotions as well as my heroin addict.’
The book concludes with Lou’s discoveries: ‘Parents are enablers, We can’t fix our addicts, Addicts break the hearts of their parents and those who love them, You cannot force your addict to get clean, Having an addict in your life is isolating, Addiction is a disease, People judge, and You can’t go back, and you must let go’. This is a very powerful book and one that deserves a wide audience – from both sides of addiction. Highly recommended.
Texas author Lou Alpert has provided one of the more sensitive books about the many, and often unspoken or recognized, aspects of addiction. The Preface to the book is written by a former addict, Scottie Collins, who speaks from his experience both as an addict and as one who has recovered and helps other addicts and their families. It makes for a powerful opening.
The book carefully describes the impact of addiction on both addicts and families of addicts – an especially timely topic in this current epidemic of opioid addiction that this country is experiencing. Because the story is related to the mother of a heroin addict, the veracity of the information is far more real than many other books about addiction. Lou begins her story (and her story is also her adopted daughter Crystal’s story) with a CNN broadcast making visual the pathetic Crystal shooting up heroin in an alley in Albuquerque, New Mexico. With that stunning beginning she traces Crystal’s life as a heroin addict, a five year history of her daughter’s dependency on heroin, her failed attempts at rehab, two pregnancies and homelessness – all related with an honesty of the agonies that represents.
Lou is a tech savvy mother and that factor makes her ability to reveal all the permutations of both addiction and response to addiction with an immediacy that intensifies the horrors: the availability of instant information and imagery and resources from the Internet has rarely been so central to an author’s writing. But in addition to Lou’s detailing Crystal’s life responses, the real impact of this book is Lou’s revealing her own co-dependency. ‘I compartmentalized my emotions as well as my heroin addict.’
The book concludes with Lou’s discoveries: ‘Parents are enablers, We can’t fix our addicts, Addicts break the hearts of their parents and those who love them, You cannot force your addict to get clean, Having an addict in your life is isolating, Addiction is a disease, People judge, and You can’t go back, and you must let go’. This is a very powerful book and one that deserves a wide audience – from both sides of addiction. Highly recommended.
October 19, 2019
Ms. Alpert relates her personal, painful five-year journey of losing her child to heroine addiction. Details related in this unembellished account of Crystal, Lou’s adopted daughter, and the impact on the family, especially Lou is sadly not the exception today. The opioid addiction that we in this country face needs to be exposed and dealt with individually as well as holistically. Having an addict in your life and family can clearly promote isolationism, as intimated by Ms. Alpert.
What is amazing about this honest rendition is the data shared by the author as a mother. It was brought home in vivid detail by the revealing texts messages, related to conversations that highlight her sad journey covering half a decade. The steps taken to try to help support and fix Crystal‘s path toward destruction, allows you to experience the pain and appreciate Lou’s commitment as a mother.
One of the most heartbreaking events early in the chronicles which struck home for me came from the CNN report.
“One December 1, 2017, Lou Alpert woke to ta CNN story featuring images of her daughter Crystal shooting up heroin in an alley, visibly pregnant and being confronted by an Albuquerque policeman. Within twenty-four hours, the story had gone viral, picked up by media outlets worldwide. Subsequent coverage followed: television interviews, news articles, and an appearance at Trumps State of the Union address by the policeman, his wife, and Crystal’s adopted daughter.”
I was overwhelmed with sadness for Lou and her entire family and yet it taught me a lot. This is a story that takes all-too-common, heart-wrenching events, then offers hope that the sharing might help prevent this for another family, another daughter or another son. Highly recommended with the caution that this book is for mature audiences, but I think also important for teens to understand potential consequences of their choices.
What is amazing about this honest rendition is the data shared by the author as a mother. It was brought home in vivid detail by the revealing texts messages, related to conversations that highlight her sad journey covering half a decade. The steps taken to try to help support and fix Crystal‘s path toward destruction, allows you to experience the pain and appreciate Lou’s commitment as a mother.
One of the most heartbreaking events early in the chronicles which struck home for me came from the CNN report.
“One December 1, 2017, Lou Alpert woke to ta CNN story featuring images of her daughter Crystal shooting up heroin in an alley, visibly pregnant and being confronted by an Albuquerque policeman. Within twenty-four hours, the story had gone viral, picked up by media outlets worldwide. Subsequent coverage followed: television interviews, news articles, and an appearance at Trumps State of the Union address by the policeman, his wife, and Crystal’s adopted daughter.”
I was overwhelmed with sadness for Lou and her entire family and yet it taught me a lot. This is a story that takes all-too-common, heart-wrenching events, then offers hope that the sharing might help prevent this for another family, another daughter or another son. Highly recommended with the caution that this book is for mature audiences, but I think also important for teens to understand potential consequences of their choices.
April 22, 2019
Surrender: A Love Letter to my Daughter by Lou Alpert chronicles a mother's harrowing and heartbreaking journey to deal with and overcome her daughter Crystal's addiction to heroin. After seeing her daughter on the news, shooting up heroin, the author knew she had to do something. After all, as a mom, she is a fixer, the person who makes everything okay, and keeps everything under control. But this time, she had to relinquish control, give up any sense of power she might have over her daughter, and simply just be. The author tells of this sad journey, one which not only affects the addict themselves, but the family as well, as everyone involved in horrendously affected by drug addiction. This is an emotional and heartrending tale, one which opens up the world of codependency and how to break the chains that sometimes bind in very unhealthy ways. This is a story of survival and acceptance, and knowing you cannot control another person and their choices. Highly recommend for an inside look at the world of addiction and its collateral damage.
October 21, 2019
In “Surrender: A love Letter to My Daughter,” author Lou Alpert uncovers the raw emotions of a mother that wishes nothing but a better life for her daughter who is suffering from hard drug influence. The letters are a reflection of stages in her life as a witness in hopes her daughter can become free from such evil. Many times her daughter, Crystal, through the strength and love of Lou’s constant fight to not give up on her daughter has enabled occasions where she sought professional help. To get cleaned and stay focused on a better life hasn’t been easy, but Crystal had her mother’s unconditional love to soldier on. Overall, a beautifully written book with the overwhelming love that encourages to not give up on your loved ones, no matter what struggles they face. I enjoyed reading Lou’s story and highly recommend others to read and grasp the understanding that there are dedicated parents that will continuously fight for their children, no matter their age.
April 26, 2019
Being honest, this book has caused me a lot of emotions, because I think that drug addiction is a tragedy! While reading, I was concentrated and immersed in the book. I got it even more emotionally because of the fact that this story was told by the mother of the heroine, who did drugs, and this is even worse, because I can’t imagine her pain and fear. I was always interested to read what happened on the next page; I was worried about the girl. The author tells how they coped with addiction, and I think it will be useful to read the book to those who have the same problem or to young people who need to understand that they shouldn’t even start. The book can be read very fast because of the context. I hope that this life story will be a bad example for many people and they won’t make a mistake in their lives, I think it is the main author’s goal.
April 29, 2019
This book by Lou Alpert is a unique story that tells the true tale of how Alpert watched her daughter Crystal struggle through a five-year addiction to heroin. Told through Alpert’s eyes, the reader sees how Crystal tries to overcome her struggle but often finds herself yet again in difficult situations such as homelessness and sometimes unsuccessful trips to rehab. Alpert soon finds herself being her daughter’s co-dependent, but later becomes enlightened with a news story that forces her to reexamine the way she is helping her daughter.
This book contains a heart-wrenching yet inspiring story that is sure to interest many. While the topic is difficult to write about, it really helps others to see how addiction can rip a family apart. Despite this, the book is designed to help inform others about this deadly problem that plagues many and help those who might be in the same position.
This book contains a heart-wrenching yet inspiring story that is sure to interest many. While the topic is difficult to write about, it really helps others to see how addiction can rip a family apart. Despite this, the book is designed to help inform others about this deadly problem that plagues many and help those who might be in the same position.
April 30, 2019
This was a hard story to read.
This is an intense read. It faces the trials of addiction head on. The story follows a mom as she tries to help her daughter kick a heroin addiction. The story delves into both the daughter addiction as well as the effects her addiction has on her mother and the inner turmoil she struggles with as she struggles with her own thoughts and feelings about her daughters addition. I like that this story really tackles the big issues that surround addiction and those who it affects both directly and indirectly. Overall this is a book that will tug at your heartstrings and makes you think. I think this book would be beneficial for anyone who is or has been there as a relative or friend to an addict as well as those who struggle with addiction.
This is an intense read. It faces the trials of addiction head on. The story follows a mom as she tries to help her daughter kick a heroin addiction. The story delves into both the daughter addiction as well as the effects her addiction has on her mother and the inner turmoil she struggles with as she struggles with her own thoughts and feelings about her daughters addition. I like that this story really tackles the big issues that surround addiction and those who it affects both directly and indirectly. Overall this is a book that will tug at your heartstrings and makes you think. I think this book would be beneficial for anyone who is or has been there as a relative or friend to an addict as well as those who struggle with addiction.
April 30, 2019
An emotional journey!
The book is an emotional journey of mother and daughter, wherein a mother is writing from her viewpoint a five-year challenging drugs addition struggle of her daughter Crystal. This is a story that could be real for many families in similar situation and can relate to it very well. This is the story of relationship, impacts, control, pain, fear and helplessness. There are times parents cannot control their children’s lives, their choices but they all suffer consequences of making bad choices.
The book is an emotional journey of mother and daughter, wherein a mother is writing from her viewpoint a five-year challenging drugs addition struggle of her daughter Crystal. This is a story that could be real for many families in similar situation and can relate to it very well. This is the story of relationship, impacts, control, pain, fear and helplessness. There are times parents cannot control their children’s lives, their choices but they all suffer consequences of making bad choices.
May 5, 2019
Very natural – a book for every parent
Dealing with a child’s drug addiction can be a really tough time for parents. In this book, we find Lou Alpert’s struggle to deal with her daughter’s drug addiction. The moment her daughter is seen publicly with the heroine; she knew it was time to take action.
The subject matter of this book is one that has eaten deep into the present generation. A lot of families dealing with the same issues can relate to the lines of this book. We see the struggles that Lou had to go through when the news media decided to share her unfortunate story with the world.
This book is certainly an outcome of her struggles to overcome. She certainly wants others in her shoes to learn a lesson or two from her story. This book is simply a book of hope and rouses strong emotions within the reader.
No parent certainly loves to see their child slowly been taken over by drugs. There are other forms of addiction that we certainly need to deal with as well. I’ve read this book twice and I can’t seem to get enough. I will like to recommend this book to parents of young adults.
Dealing with a child’s drug addiction can be a really tough time for parents. In this book, we find Lou Alpert’s struggle to deal with her daughter’s drug addiction. The moment her daughter is seen publicly with the heroine; she knew it was time to take action.
The subject matter of this book is one that has eaten deep into the present generation. A lot of families dealing with the same issues can relate to the lines of this book. We see the struggles that Lou had to go through when the news media decided to share her unfortunate story with the world.
This book is certainly an outcome of her struggles to overcome. She certainly wants others in her shoes to learn a lesson or two from her story. This book is simply a book of hope and rouses strong emotions within the reader.
No parent certainly loves to see their child slowly been taken over by drugs. There are other forms of addiction that we certainly need to deal with as well. I’ve read this book twice and I can’t seem to get enough. I will like to recommend this book to parents of young adults.
Displaying 1 - 11 of 11 reviews