The Accidental Teacher: Life Lessons from My Silent Son

by Annie Lubliner Lehmann, Catherine Lord (Foreword)

"Jonah Lehmann is an accidental teacher of others, including his family and friends. This personal and touching account of Jonah's life is enlightening, especially to those coming to terms with similar challenges with autism and other cognitive disabilities. It was written with love to support research on autism, and I recommend it to anyone and everyone touched by those of us who are different."
---Patricia E. Kefalas Dudek, Legal Advocate for People with Disabilities "I have never read a book about a disabled person that caught me from page one. I could not put this one down. Lehmann offers a profound perspective on living with the reality of a severely disabled child. This book will be required reading for students who take my class in Special Education Administration."
---Frances LaPlante-Sosnowsky, Associate Professor of Education at Wayne State University "A story of the astonishing power of human love and family triumph over hardship. Lehmann's story, engaging and at times both heartbreaking and joyful, offers an intimate view of one mother's journey as she works with professionals and a blur of caregivers to assist the ever-changing needs of her son. I highly recommend it to seasoned professionals in the field of autism and students preparing for careers in special education."
---Janet E. Graetz, Assistant Professor of Human Development and Child Studies at Oakland University A child teaches without intending to . . .
Having severe autism does not stop Annie Lehmann's son Jonah from teaching her some of life's most valuable lessons. The Accidental Teacher, a heartfelt memoir about self-discovery rather than illness, uses insight and humor to weave a tale rich with kitchen-table wisdom. It explains the realities of life with a largely nonverbal son and explores the frustrations and triumphs of the Lehmann family as Jonah grew into a young adult. This book is a must-read for anyone who has been personally touched by a major life challenge. Annie Lubliner Lehmann, a freelance writer for more than twenty-five years, has published articles in many newspapers and magazines, including the New York Times and Detroit Free Press. She resides in Michigan with her husband and two of her three children. Her eldest son, who inspired this memoir, is now a young adult with autism who lives in a supervised home.

184 pages, Paperback

First published April 14, 2008

Reviews

[Nabanita Sengupta · Rating 4 out of 5]

Motherhood in itself is a challenge and it increases manifold in case of a mother with an autistic child. Lehmann in a matter of fact manner narrates her journey as a mother to an autistic and two normal children. There is no exaggeration in the narrative but a sensitive portrayal of the challenges that she had to take up to provide a decent living to her autistic son. This book raises some really important question that if an affluent family in a first world country has to go through so much to provide for their autistic child, where does it leave the economically poorer families and in countries with lesser resources!
A must read book for an understanding of how much struggle the family and the individual has to go through to negotiate with the simple day to day tasks of life.

[Erin · Rating 2 out of 5]

You could tell this book was not written by a seasoned author, but it was interesting to get an inside perspective on what it's like as a mother raising a disabled child. Wow, I thought parenting was hard period but this book makes it look like a cake-walk; this book shows how impossibly difficult it can get. The most redeeming part for me was how it gave me a window into this mother's head - her thought process, emotional process, throughout raising her son, and it was both relieving and shocking to discover her thought/emotional processes are EXACTLY like mine in terms of parenting. I don't have a disabled child, but the general neurosis that parents (mothers, maybe) tend to feel in this modern day and age, is the very same. It was disturbing in the sense that to witness it as an unattached observer made me realize how absolutely NEUROTIC and diseased that kind of thinking is. My thinking is neurotic and diseased in terms of parental anxiety and that is hard to swallow, yet also a blessing to realize in that it can help me let go and find my path to a healthier way of thinking/being. I did really appreciate her blunt candor in sharing her truly ambivalent emotions - wanting to just "send" her son away for some much needed relief from the intense responsibilities and difficulties of caring for him, while also never wanting him to be taken care of by anyone but herself and incredibly determined to do just that). I too feel such ambivalent feelings about parenting, which I had been too afraid to show as I did not know those feelings were "normal" or that it's not "just me" or that it doesn't mean I am a bad parent. So again, what a relief to know none of that is true! The other best part of this book is when she finally realizes that she for so long had not accepted her son as he is; she was holding on to her expectations of him improving, and constantly comparing him to other children. This a good reminder for all parents that we unconsciously don't accept our children as they are now for a variety of reasons, such as if they are ill we constantly anxiously expecting their wellness to the degree that we miss out on the moments NOW. Accepting NOW as it is does not meet inaction, it simply means being completely present for and with your child, while taking the actions you can to help your child.

[Julie · Rating 4 out of 5]

Like I need to read another book written by an autism mother. I should just write my own. So far, though, this one's realistic about the challenges and refers to the peddlers of supplements and other false hope cures as "snake-oil salesmen."

Now that I'm finished, I feel the same. This is an unflinching memoir. This mom tried everything. Her son still has autism. He still needs special care as an adult. She doesn't need to sound apologetic. That's reality.

Having money helps, and she wonders about the fates of other families and individuals (like mine) who don't have the resources her family has - something Jenny McCarthy sure doesn't seem to get.

This is a quick read and well done. It appears to be self-published, and those aren't usually very good. This one needs to get on the bookshelves at B&N and Borders to counteract the Jenny MC books and others of that ilk.

[AFFAF TABASSUM · Rating 4 out of 5]

I have read " The Accidental Teacher." In my opinion, this is a well written book. Though I couldn't relate to the situation the mother was in, I could relate to some of the concepts she had to deal with. For me, this book was a bit boring and as far as I've read, there hasn't been a "edge of the seat" part in the book. And I don't recommend it if you like books that are thrilling and exciting. But overall it was a nice book that showed the struggles and the perseverance a mother had to go through with her autistic son, Jonah.

[AFFAF TABASSUM · Rating 3 out of 5]

I have read " The accidental Teacher." In my opinion, this is a well written book. Though I couldn't relate to the situation the mom herself was going through, I could relate the to some of the concepts she had to deal with. For me it was a bit boring. There wasn't or haven't been a much of a "edge of the seat" moment in the book so far. But overall it was a nice book that shows perseverance, strength, love, and struggles a mother has with her love.