I Don't Know Why…I Guess I'm Shy: A Story About Taming Imaginary Fears

by Barbara S. Cain M.S.W., Barbara S. Cain M.S.W.

Sammy Samson is shy…too shy to speak to kind Mr. Miller, who used to be his bird-watching buddy, or to friendly Mr. Daniels, the ice cream man. But one day, when Sammy's beloved dog Sparky gets lost, Sammy forgets all about his shyness and can think only of finding his missing pup. Soon enough, he's talking to everyone!

Most children go through a period or two in their young lives when they are afraid of new people and unfamiliar places. Whether your child is experiencing the occasional pang or has been wrestling with more pervasive fears, I Don’t Know Why … I Guess I’m Shy can help.

The fun-filled, encouraging story shows how most fears that underlie shyness are based on imaginary concerns, and it suggests new ways for children to respond to situations that make them uncomfortable. Following the story, a special section for parents explains the phenomenon of shyness, describes how best to use this book, and offers an extensive list of proven methods for assisting your child through this usually normal though uncomfortable stage.

From the Note to Parents:

Although this book focuses exclusively on shyness with adults, the underlying psychology (fear of anger, criticism, failure, and embarrassment) operates in other situations that trigger shyness — with peers, large groups, performances, and unfamiliar people and places. This story focuses on shyness with adults because children typically view this manifestation as less shameful than, say, shyness around peers, and they can therefore claim it more readily and discuss it more candidly. 

In addition, guidelines for parents' behavior are offered throughout the store. Mrs. Samson poses thoughtful questions but doesn't probe or insist on answers. She reassures, makes gentle suggestions, and encourages self-exploration but does so with humor, affection, and unobtrusive interest.

32 pages, Hardcover

First published February 1, 2000

Reviews

[Ashtyn Gross · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book is helpful for all students – especially those who feel shy often. There is even help in the back on how to use the book and how parents (and other adults) can make a difference. As the book suggests, the story line is meant to engage discussion about Sammy’s nervousness about talking to adults, where those feelings may be coming from, and how to encourage yourself to feel more comfortable speaking to others. This book also defines “shyness” and lists feelings that may trigger shyness in a child. This can be helpful for teachers to understand students, for students to understand their peers, and for students to understand themselves and their feelings when experiencing shyness. I like that this book shows that main character – Sammy – and the growth he experienced during this trip. He begins the story tentative to talk to another adult and when his mother asks him why he says he is afraid to sound dumb or for someone to be mad. But in order to work through a problem, Sammy has to ask these adults questions/for help and he eventually realizes that maybe he worries too much.

[Madison Oelke · Rating 5 out of 5]

I really enjoyed this book. Growing up shy was really difficult for me and many others, and I think it's nice to acknowledge the feeling, along with methods in the back of the book on how to "fix"/adjust behavior so that kids can get out of their shell a bit more without feeling overwhelmed or pressured. I will definitely have this book in my classroom when I have one, it will be very helpful to read to the class and address shyness.