YOU'LL LOVE MEN LOVE FOOTBALL, WOMEN LOVE FOREPLAY Because it ... - Is perfect for people who don't like to read books with really big words. - Makes for a great coaster AND is super absorber. - Contains absolutely no Chicken Soup. - Looks more expensive than it really is. - Was made by Americans of legal working age. - Can be used as a flotation device ( for a very short period of time ). - Is guaranteed to irritate those to the far left AND the far right. - Will completely wash away the few remaining fragments of respect women have for men.