Don’t Poo in the Pudding Bowl: Anecdotes from 13,414 days of teaching

by Maxine Blake, Rebecca Wojurska (Editor), Jo Titman (Illustrator)

They never taught me how to handle this during teacher training at university.
I work in a world with hormonal teenagers, inappropriate proposals, the full spectrum of bodily odours and the odd indecent exposure.”

Ever wondered what life is like as a teacher? Or what happens on school or college trips? Perhaps you’ve speculated on what your teacher really thought about the students.

Don’t Poo in the Pudding Bowl answers these questions and more! Including 34 real-life stories about teaching teens in Sheffield, this book reveals exactly what happens behind those school doors. Maxine Blake, a teacher for 37 years, takes the reader on a whirlwind tour of classrooms, school trips and student shenanigans, with plenty of awkward, embarrassing and laugh-out-loud funny moments along the way. From students escaping out of windows to conversations about farting pigeons, these stories will have you clutching your sides with laughter.

Captivating, moving and side-splittingly hilarious, Don’t Poo in the Pudding Bowl is a must-read full of insights about the life of a teacher. Welcome to life in the classroom!

A collection of short stories describing teacher/student interactions interjected with comedy moments, drama and of course teenage toilet humour. Don’t Poo, is a humorous memoir, collated throughout Maxine’s years of teaching. Perfect for your coffee table, bathroom reading or a dinner party conversation starter.
This a great gift for those parents who ever wondered what their children get up to in and out of their classrooms whilst at school or if you want to re-live your childhood shenanigans with your friends. A reminder for teachers of what they’ve been through and more importantly, what is left to come.

225 pages, Paperback

Published November 28, 2022

About the author

Maxine Blake is of Jamaican descent and was born and raised in Wolverhampton in the UK. She has taught and managed in educational establishments across the country for 37 years before retiring in 2020. She holds a Master of Education degree from the University of Sheffield, focussing on sport education.

In her retirement, Maxine has become a professional busy-body and continues to scrutinise student work both nationally and internationally. She also sings with the Sheffield Community Choir and went on stage with Take That on their Greatest Hits tour. She dabbles in piano playing and, even after a decade of practice, still refuses to play for an audience of more than two.

Post-2020 madness she hopes to continue her journey towards becoming a travel writer, as an excuse to see more of the world… not that she needs one.

She lives in Sheffield with her husband and also her son, who is fortunately or unfortunately still locked down with them. Sometimes they join her on her comically slow morning runs.

Reviews

[Kerryn Johns]

Every teacher has remarked from time to time “I should write a book about what we do!” Maxine Blake has actually done it. Her book “Don’t Poo in the Pudding Bowl” is filled with funny, and often entirely too relatable, anecdotes from her years in the classroom.

I only started the book yesterday and finished it today - the fact that they were all short stories made it really easy to read and to keep wanting to hear more! Naturally enough I recommend it for teachers, but I think it would also be interesting reading for those wanting to know more about our unique profession. I “recognised” a lot of the students described in the book, and I too have had my own traumatic “skirt incident” in the classroom.

Thanks, Maxine, for sending me a copy of your book in exchange for an honest review!

[Kathy]

The title will capture your attention and the stories your gut as you laugh through the authors 37 years of teaching. Maxine Blake has captured life in a European school experience wit wit and humor beautifully. As an educator it was easy to see some of my own experiences within her stories even when not the same. You can tell from the short stories the author handled some precarious and funny situations with grace and humor throughout her career. Educators will definitely relate and find the humor here.

[Yvette Kulik]

This book takes us on an extraordinary and uproarious ride through the unpredictable world of college teaching. With a blend of humor, insight, and a touch of martial arts prowess, Blake's collection of short stories offers a delightful glimpse into the trials and triumphs of being an educator.
I remembered the years when I was a student and what I had experienced with my students later, amusing things.
The title itself, "Don’t Poo in the Pudding Bowl," perfectly captures the irreverent and mischievous spirit found within the pages. Blake's ability to weave together amusing tales of students' shenanigans is nothing short of remarkable.
Blake's students come to life on the page, making readers feel like they are right there in the classroom witnessing these unforgettable moments.

[Sara O'Brien]

Soooo I am not a teacher nor do I know any personally but if what is in this book is what happens to them at school then I hope more of these books start coming out because its hilarious. I loved how raw and open Maxine was during the writing of this book, she made it to where it felt like I was right there with her. Her explanation for certain things and descriptions of her students was truly touching. it really showed in her writing just how much she cared for her students and i for one appreciated it. The only downside of this book for me was that some of the stories didn’t have enough context, that is just MY preference though so I am giving it 4 out of 5 stars.

[Feather Chelle]

A candid and humorous glimpse into the life of a teacher

I love the author’s eloquence as she reminisces about the antics of teenagers during her long teaching career. So many scenarios made me laugh out loud, and I admire the calm manner in which she handled each one. I know that many teachers will relate to this book, while others will enjoy the glimpse into the eccentricities of school life.

[Christine Karageorgis]

This book was not what I expected it to be.
I heard the author speak on a podcast for teachers, and she sounded funny and witty so I had high expectations for this book.
Maybe the cultural differences between schools in the United States and schools in England, where her stories take place, is part of the reason it did not meet my expectations.
Most of the stories aren’t all that funny, and some of them might’ve been the “”had to be there” kind.

[Jessica Cooper]

Okay wait I thoroughly enjoyed this book. Didn’t really know what to expect but it was great. I love a book with a ton of different stories! (A memoir? Well I love memoirs but does this count? Yay!)