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In the Midst of It All
Nandi Nxumalo finds herself in a complex situation. As her relationship with her Nigerian lover, Femi Adewoye, progresses, she needs to tell her very strict and prejudiced father about him.
Then xenophobic attacks break out all over South Africa, and Nandi and Femi do not escape unaffected. Nandi feels she has to do something, even if she faces immense opposition from various quarters – she can no longer be silent.
Then xenophobic attacks break out all over South Africa, and Nandi and Femi do not escape unaffected. Nandi feels she has to do something, even if she faces immense opposition from various quarters – she can no longer be silent.
- GenresSouth Africa
344 pages, Paperback
Published September 1, 2022
2 people are currently reading
104 people want to read
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Displaying 1 - 10 of 10 reviews
February 28, 2023
Actual rating is 3.5
January 15, 2023
I was so desperate to like this book. Unfortunately, my desperation was not enough to make "In the Midst of it All" good.
When I started reading it, I was sure that I was going to give it 4 stars, but the annoying relationship dynamics, not-really-good-enough writing and very surface-level exploration of xenophobia in South Africa stunted my ability to enjoy it.
I guess we should start with the key driving force of this entire book - xenophobia. I'm all for people condemning xenophobia. However, the nature of this book made the exploration of this incredibly serious topic feel super elementary to me.
Thabile Shange's attempt to wedge such a hefty issue into a romance novel (I'm guessing this is what this? I'm not even sure) resulted in it being robbed of the nuance it needed.
If the focus had been on just Nandi's father's xenophobia, this book could've been a bit better. It's hard to giggle about relationship bliss just after the author spoke about people dying and being dispossessed.
I feel like the inclusion of this issue to a macro level was a disservice to all the parties concerned. We couldn't understand (fully) how Nandi's own partner felt about xenophobia (ironically, *her* feelings (as a South African) about xenophobia where explored more than those of her partner (a Nigerian)), the impact it has on migrant families, the fact that this ire is always directed at black and brown foreigners, not white ones and so on. Because Shange couldn't include the necessary nuance properly, xenophobia in the South African context was depicted in am excessively simplistic manner.
How can you, in one breath, explain that xenophobia is more than just irrational hatred of a particular group of people (that it is strongly tied to poverty, white supremacy and internalised anti-blackness) and then depict every single notable character who expresses xenophobic rhetoric (particularly those who don't engage in violent acts) as just "hooligans"? You have to understand that that doesn't make sense.
At some point, Nandi demanded a black service worker to get on his knees and apologise to her boyfriend for saying a xenophobic slur. What are we supposed to make of this??
There's this weird, implicit idea put forward that - through the sheer force of their love and fetishisation of Nigerian men - black women are going to end xenophobia. I didn't like that.
There were also attempts to talk about other issues in this country - all of which fell flat to me. Ultimately, I feel like the author bit off more than she could chew where this is concerned.
I didn't like any of the characters in the book. So many characters are put into this book and there's so many loose ends regarding their mini plots because the author seems to forget about them the moment they don't push forward a resolution/conflict in Nandi and Femi's relationship. We have Princess, Simon, Phindy and Gugu. All of these characters have personal conflicts, but these just hang unfinished because Nandi and Femi are happy now.
Speaking of Nandi and Femi, theirs has to be one of the most mind-numbingly annoying relationships I've ever read about. They had a million misunderstanding and every single one of them was stupid. If they had just told each other the truth (in some cases, told each other literally anything) 99% of their conflicts could have been avoided. Sir, why are you lying about going to another country?
Their constant arguing made the book feel like it had a million conflicts and resolutions. This made for an unenjoyable read. I'm actually not even sure what the actual major conflict was. It can't be the father's behaviour, because he was ignored for a sizeable portion of the book and just showed up at the end. It can't xenophobia as a whole because... you know, it wasn't resolved lol. So, what is it 😭
Whenever a conflict that actually makes sense comes around, the author quickly brushes over it by creating fade to black sex. The fact that Nandi has a more proactive approach towards xenophobia and Femi has the complete opposite could have been a reasonable cause for conflict. But what does Thabile Shange do? She makes them have sex.
The relationship as a whole was unconvincing to me. We never saw their relationship develop as a there's a huge time skip between when they first meet and the actual story. Most of the meaningful moments in their relationship are not actually on paper - we only ever hear about these after the fact.
I also feel like Shange struggled to show AND tell. I normally hate books that tell, but I would settled for even that 😭. The characters would hear something taht infuriated them or saddened them or made them happy and there was just no elaboration whatsoever. The author would just say "And Femi was infuriated."
Hao? And then what? Tell me more hleng!
This book had a lot of potential. I wish I could explain why it was such a let down to me some more, but I simply don't know how to. It was a very frustrating and disappointing read.
Personally, I would not recommend this book. The only reason I didn't give it one star, is because I was excited to read a book by a South African author and that excitement never faded. I enjoyed reading South African English, the references and the inclusion of indigenous languages. There were also a few funny bits of dialogue in the book.
When I started reading it, I was sure that I was going to give it 4 stars, but the annoying relationship dynamics, not-really-good-enough writing and very surface-level exploration of xenophobia in South Africa stunted my ability to enjoy it.
I guess we should start with the key driving force of this entire book - xenophobia. I'm all for people condemning xenophobia. However, the nature of this book made the exploration of this incredibly serious topic feel super elementary to me.
Thabile Shange's attempt to wedge such a hefty issue into a romance novel (I'm guessing this is what this? I'm not even sure) resulted in it being robbed of the nuance it needed.
If the focus had been on just Nandi's father's xenophobia, this book could've been a bit better. It's hard to giggle about relationship bliss just after the author spoke about people dying and being dispossessed.
I feel like the inclusion of this issue to a macro level was a disservice to all the parties concerned. We couldn't understand (fully) how Nandi's own partner felt about xenophobia (ironically, *her* feelings (as a South African) about xenophobia where explored more than those of her partner (a Nigerian)), the impact it has on migrant families, the fact that this ire is always directed at black and brown foreigners, not white ones and so on. Because Shange couldn't include the necessary nuance properly, xenophobia in the South African context was depicted in am excessively simplistic manner.
How can you, in one breath, explain that xenophobia is more than just irrational hatred of a particular group of people (that it is strongly tied to poverty, white supremacy and internalised anti-blackness) and then depict every single notable character who expresses xenophobic rhetoric (particularly those who don't engage in violent acts) as just "hooligans"? You have to understand that that doesn't make sense.
At some point, Nandi demanded a black service worker to get on his knees and apologise to her boyfriend for saying a xenophobic slur. What are we supposed to make of this??
There's this weird, implicit idea put forward that - through the sheer force of their love and fetishisation of Nigerian men - black women are going to end xenophobia. I didn't like that.
There were also attempts to talk about other issues in this country - all of which fell flat to me. Ultimately, I feel like the author bit off more than she could chew where this is concerned.
I didn't like any of the characters in the book. So many characters are put into this book and there's so many loose ends regarding their mini plots because the author seems to forget about them the moment they don't push forward a resolution/conflict in Nandi and Femi's relationship. We have Princess, Simon, Phindy and Gugu. All of these characters have personal conflicts, but these just hang unfinished because Nandi and Femi are happy now.
Speaking of Nandi and Femi, theirs has to be one of the most mind-numbingly annoying relationships I've ever read about. They had a million misunderstanding and every single one of them was stupid. If they had just told each other the truth (in some cases, told each other literally anything) 99% of their conflicts could have been avoided. Sir, why are you lying about going to another country?
Their constant arguing made the book feel like it had a million conflicts and resolutions. This made for an unenjoyable read. I'm actually not even sure what the actual major conflict was. It can't be the father's behaviour, because he was ignored for a sizeable portion of the book and just showed up at the end. It can't xenophobia as a whole because... you know, it wasn't resolved lol. So, what is it 😭
Whenever a conflict that actually makes sense comes around, the author quickly brushes over it by creating fade to black sex. The fact that Nandi has a more proactive approach towards xenophobia and Femi has the complete opposite could have been a reasonable cause for conflict. But what does Thabile Shange do? She makes them have sex.
The relationship as a whole was unconvincing to me. We never saw their relationship develop as a there's a huge time skip between when they first meet and the actual story. Most of the meaningful moments in their relationship are not actually on paper - we only ever hear about these after the fact.
I also feel like Shange struggled to show AND tell. I normally hate books that tell, but I would settled for even that 😭. The characters would hear something taht infuriated them or saddened them or made them happy and there was just no elaboration whatsoever. The author would just say "And Femi was infuriated."
Hao? And then what? Tell me more hleng!
This book had a lot of potential. I wish I could explain why it was such a let down to me some more, but I simply don't know how to. It was a very frustrating and disappointing read.
Personally, I would not recommend this book. The only reason I didn't give it one star, is because I was excited to read a book by a South African author and that excitement never faded. I enjoyed reading South African English, the references and the inclusion of indigenous languages. There were also a few funny bits of dialogue in the book.
December 31, 2023
2.5⭐️
I liked that this book talked about xenophobia in South Africa, however my issue with this book was the main characters, I felt like they were in a toxic relationship and the author romanticized it
I liked that this book talked about xenophobia in South Africa, however my issue with this book was the main characters, I felt like they were in a toxic relationship and the author romanticized it
November 24, 2022
That moment when you finish a good book and you don't know what to do with your life😭
What a novel, what a story. I loved all the characters and storyline!
What a novel, what a story. I loved all the characters and storyline!
December 16, 2022
🫶🏽My heart is so full as I write this. This is a uniquely South African story with rich characters, a page-turner of a plot and so much heart.
In the Midst of It All is an angsty contemporary novel with two characters that will wiggle their way into readers’ hearts. Nandi Nxumalo is a young journalist who lives with her divorced father and sister.
From the moment Nandi lays eyes on Femi Adewayo at his car repair workshop, she is charmed by his good looks and confidence. They strike up a romantic relationship, not one of huge gestures or a lavish lifestyle, but simple every day partnership.
Nandi and Femi captivated me from the start. I enjoyed their relationship development from a superficial attraction to overcoming their cultural differences and developing a mature partnership where they band together to fight for their love. I also enjoyed the pacing of the story, as well as how it refused to stick to known tropes, but rather forged its own unique plot.
What hit home for me is not just the love story, but the community that Nandi and Femi built around themselves. This book is brilliant, intentional and well-executed. It just worked for me.
I don’t know if this is the author’s debut novel but, Thabile Shange writes with the boldness and lushness of a seasoned writer. I want to applaud her for coming up with entertaining, scenes that are grounded in reality. She tackles complex topics such as xenophobia (Afrophobia), racism and parental manipulation with an unflinching and engaging approach that makes the reader feel like they are a part of the journey. I’m in awe of how she achieved this in less than 400 pages.
I zipped through the first two thirds of the book, then I realised I didn’t want the story to end and slowed my pace. I’ll treasure these characters for a long time.
5⭐️
In the Midst of It All is an angsty contemporary novel with two characters that will wiggle their way into readers’ hearts. Nandi Nxumalo is a young journalist who lives with her divorced father and sister.
From the moment Nandi lays eyes on Femi Adewayo at his car repair workshop, she is charmed by his good looks and confidence. They strike up a romantic relationship, not one of huge gestures or a lavish lifestyle, but simple every day partnership.
Nandi and Femi captivated me from the start. I enjoyed their relationship development from a superficial attraction to overcoming their cultural differences and developing a mature partnership where they band together to fight for their love. I also enjoyed the pacing of the story, as well as how it refused to stick to known tropes, but rather forged its own unique plot.
What hit home for me is not just the love story, but the community that Nandi and Femi built around themselves. This book is brilliant, intentional and well-executed. It just worked for me.
I don’t know if this is the author’s debut novel but, Thabile Shange writes with the boldness and lushness of a seasoned writer. I want to applaud her for coming up with entertaining, scenes that are grounded in reality. She tackles complex topics such as xenophobia (Afrophobia), racism and parental manipulation with an unflinching and engaging approach that makes the reader feel like they are a part of the journey. I’m in awe of how she achieved this in less than 400 pages.
I zipped through the first two thirds of the book, then I realised I didn’t want the story to end and slowed my pace. I’ll treasure these characters for a long time.
5⭐️
May 22, 2023
It is always refreshing to read a book set in my hometown, addressing issues specific to the African continent. No matter what I thought about the book, I want to commend the author for writing this highly important and topical story!
Nandi, who is a Zulu South African, and Femi, is a Yoruba Nigerian man, embark in a passionate realtionship amidst the extreme xenophobia against African nationals in South Africa. Femi first seems too good to be true in Nandi's eyes. After all, her father had previously warned her that Nigerians were evil people who sold drugs and murdered children.
Femi shocks her expectations in the opposite direction. He is the definition of a "tall, dark, and handsome black man" as well as being charming, polite, relaxed, and kind. Femi is, above all, sensible and aware of his goals in life. He appeals to Nandi immediately. Their relationship challenges stereotypes even though Nandi and Femi have to deal with her dad hating Femi (purely based on his nationality) and the way South Africans treat black foreign nationals.
As a South African who lived through the xenophobic attacks in the early 2000s, I felt like I was right back there- in Durban- during that time period. The anxiety, shock and horror all came rushing back.
This book showed a lot of promise and I was excited to get into it. However, somewhere along the way, it became a chore. It was very clear to me that this author is a young adult writer- the writing was very juvenile. At its core, it turned more into romance rather than delving deeply into xenophobia (which is much more needed than another romance). At the end of the day I enjoyed this book but I think it will appeal to a much younger audience.
Nandi, who is a Zulu South African, and Femi, is a Yoruba Nigerian man, embark in a passionate realtionship amidst the extreme xenophobia against African nationals in South Africa. Femi first seems too good to be true in Nandi's eyes. After all, her father had previously warned her that Nigerians were evil people who sold drugs and murdered children.
Femi shocks her expectations in the opposite direction. He is the definition of a "tall, dark, and handsome black man" as well as being charming, polite, relaxed, and kind. Femi is, above all, sensible and aware of his goals in life. He appeals to Nandi immediately. Their relationship challenges stereotypes even though Nandi and Femi have to deal with her dad hating Femi (purely based on his nationality) and the way South Africans treat black foreign nationals.
As a South African who lived through the xenophobic attacks in the early 2000s, I felt like I was right back there- in Durban- during that time period. The anxiety, shock and horror all came rushing back.
This book showed a lot of promise and I was excited to get into it. However, somewhere along the way, it became a chore. It was very clear to me that this author is a young adult writer- the writing was very juvenile. At its core, it turned more into romance rather than delving deeply into xenophobia (which is much more needed than another romance). At the end of the day I enjoyed this book but I think it will appeal to a much younger audience.
November 20, 2024
Is it a romance, or is it a social commentary? something is not make sure.
The characters are interesting but lack the depth needed to properly support the story’s themes. As a result, the narrative feels like it’s trying to tackle too many things without truly excelling at any of them.
For readers seeking a romance, the book might work as an easy read. However, those hoping for a deep dive into the social issues touched on in the story may find themselves disappointed.
The characters are interesting but lack the depth needed to properly support the story’s themes. As a result, the narrative feels like it’s trying to tackle too many things without truly excelling at any of them.
For readers seeking a romance, the book might work as an easy read. However, those hoping for a deep dive into the social issues touched on in the story may find themselves disappointed.
November 22, 2022
Breathtaking... A page turner!
November 15, 2025
This book got me hooked ♥️♥️♥️
December 17, 2025
3.5 stars
Displaying 1 - 10 of 10 reviews