What Does Hate Look Like?

by Sameea Jimenez, Corinne Promislow, Larry Swartz (With)

How do we face hate?

We use the word hate all the time―“I hate vegetables” or “I hated that movie!”―but what about the hate that actually hurts someone? There are words, symbols, ideas, beliefs, and actions that cause pain―to us, our friends, family, neighbours, and school mates. What if you’ve caused that kind of pain yourself? Or what if you, or someone you know, has been the victim of hate so scary it made you want to cry? Real kids from real classrooms share their stories here to help us to see the bias, prejudice, violence, discrimination, and exclusion around us―what hate looks like to them. Why? So we can stand against hate and never be the cause of it. And to show us how to cope and get support if we have been hurt. By sharing our stories, we all become stronger. Our schools, neighbourhoods, and communities become safer and more kind, and hate doesn’t win.

110 pages, Paperback

Published March 7, 2023

About the author

Sameea Jimenez is an elementary educator in the Toronto District School Board. Her teaching is rooted in anti-oppression and anti-racism and is committed to challenging social norms and paradigms. Sameea specializes in social justice education and is an advocate for systemic change within educational institutions. She has created and facilitated professional development around anti-racism and anti-discrimination for educators.

Reviews

[Helen · Rating 5 out of 5]

Reading about hate can be heavy going. To avoid getting discouraged - skip ahead. Read Chapter 5, “How Can We Move from Bystanders to Upstanders?”, Chapter 6, “Why Should We Care?” and Chapter 7, “What Does All This Mean For You?”

This book will be lots of things to lots of people. Chapter 6 succinctly expresses how this book is helpful to me. It asks, “What can you do to make positive change? You can learn about your own bias.” (Page 85). Reading this 95-page book helped me progress with that, even though it’s for kids, and I am (allegedly) a grown-up. For example, it taught me that I have – unfortunately - perpetrated microaggressions, against friends. Oh dear! However, now I know. Empowered with a bit more knowledge, I can try to do better.

Chapter 5 offers five ways to empower yourself against hate. It also includes examples where kids did something that made a difference. One guy relates how he came out to his school as trans and asked them to use his chosen name and pronouns. He got a standing ovation. Another kid talks about making friends with a kid who everyone bullied. They became close friends. She changed her new friend’s life. Readers can see that kids made those successes really happened. (Hooray!)

Chapter 7 provides useful, succinct, bullet point lists for “How to React to Hate” for “Victims,” “Upstanders,” and “People Who Inflict Hate.” Other engaging aspects of this book are boxes throughout, that start, “What would you do if…” These boxes offer concrete situations a reader might experience. A good example is, “What would you do if you received an email that said something racist about one of your friends?”

Largely, however, this book succeeds in answering the question in the title. As in Chapter 5, real kids describe real things that happened to them. Brave kids talk about experiences they had with hatred. Importantly they talk about how these incidents made them feel - self-hatred, anger, confusion, humiliation, embarrassment, upset, invisible, etc.

Victims, “upstanders” and “people who hate” can all learn about themselves and others from this book. If we want to be part of the solution, it’s good to learn about the problem.

Oh, one more thing. There are lots of inspiring quotations in this book. “No one person is born hating another… People must learn to hate, and if they can learn to hate, they can be taught to love, for love comes more naturally to the human heart than its opposite.” – Nelson Mandela

[Alicia · Rating 3 out of 5]

Going to be moderating a panel with this book shortly. With the voices from those that have been marginalized whether through ableism, homophobia, Islamophobia, anti-Semitism, and body shaming to name a handful, kids share their thoughts and experiences with them while the editor/authors including information for self-advocacy and advocating from others, learning and caring through empathetic education, and sharing how we are all connected. Includes illustrations and an easy flow through hard topics.

[Barbra · Rating 4 out of 5]

In this book children from grades 4 to 9 have contributed real stories about how racism and bullying has affected them. It covers the topics of where hate comes from, through physical, cyber, and verbal abuse. It gives suggestions on how kids can cope and help others. This book is a beneficial resource for kids, parents, and educators, and provides the chance to initiate conversations, so children can tell their own stories and come up with solutions.

[Jessica · Rating 5 out of 5]

Amazing book! Very well-written and informative. I will definitely be bringing this into my grade 6 classroom curriculum. The book touches on important topics that need to be talked about both inside and outside of the classroom.