Sins of the Father: Abused by my father every day for a decade, this is my story of survival

by Shaneda Daly

One of Ireland's most powerful campaigners' The Kavanagh Sisters I look back now and see that I never stood a chance. It's hard when you realise your whole childhood was taken away. I never got the chance to be a child.' Shaneda Daly was only four when her father started grooming her. For nearly 15 years, he would go on to sexually abuse his daughter every day. The emotional and physical toll was immense and, eventually, her ex-army and prison officer father admitted to his family what he had been doing. Leaving home for only a year to get help, he was welcomed back 'a changed man'. With no choice but to accept it, Shaneda lived alongside him again only for him to try and abuse her once more. After realising she had no choice but to leave home, Shaneda finally reclaimed her power by standing up to the man who destroyed her childhood and contacted the police. Decades later, in 2011, she watched as her father was convicted of 227 counts of abuse. Shaneda now fights as a campaigner for other victims and is bravely telling her story fully for the first the story of a survivor.

304 pages, Paperback

Published February 17, 2022

Reviews

[Bethany Feuerherdt · Rating 5 out of 5]

What a brave storyteller. Thank you Shaneda Daly for sharing your story and empowering other victims or survivors to speak out. Of course a very difficult read, yet the witty and easy to follow writing style made it easy to finish in a day.

Shaneda outlining how the church would consider her abortion more sinful than her fathers years of child sex was very profound. I can’t believe that Harry Daly walks free today after all he did.

[Hannah · Rating 5 out of 5]

It takes immense courage to talk about child sexual abuse and Shaneda Daly doesn't hold back in this moving, shocking true story.

From the age of eight until she was seventeen, Daly was groomed, sexually abused and raped by her father. When she finally spoke out against him, her own mother turned her back on her and stood by her husband.

This book would certainly be triggering for abuse survivors and possibly for women who have struggled with pregnancy loss, (the only part that triggered me was that she also lost a baby at 11 weeks and had to have a D&C procedure afterwards) but it's also an excellent guide as to what to expect later on and the support that's available.

Daly went on to set up a Facebook page, Survivors Side by Side to give survivors a safe platform to talk privately about their experiences. She's also an outspoken activist in Ireland where she's fighting to have laws changed.

This is a very moving, very honest book and I'm glad I read it, and although it was hard at times to read through so many accounts of horrific abuse, reading it will obviously never compare to the feelings and the courage of the lady who wrote it; Shaneda Daly and all victims of any form of abuse deserve to be heard.

[Emanuela · Rating 5 out of 5]

Well written. Absolutely shocking. A must read for the abuse victims in the hope to help them during the hard journey of dealing with the scars they carry in their souls. A must read for those lucky enough to not have experienced such demonic treatment to open their eyes on the horrors this society carries. Between her father and her mother I really can't say who's worse. I admire the strenght of Shaneda, there's no much it can be said, everything sounds out of place, except I send her my love and a hug

[Zelda · Rating 5 out of 5]

Heartbreaking, graphic, life affirming.
This book was just heartbreaking to read. Even though some very disturbing, painful and graphic events are written about here, I really appreciate the author's honest, open, unapologetic way of presenting the facts of her life. I can only imagine how trapped, miserable and frightened she must have felt at times, with a father whose main focus on her was as a sex object, and a mother who seemed indifferent and was in denial. I really like Shaneda's portrayal of her maternal grandma, aunts and cousins. They gave her the warmth, love and support that she couldn't get at home. Throughout all of the sadness and fear of her life, Sheneda's strength of spirit shines through. I recommend this book for those who like reading true stories about children who eventually triumphed over their situations.

[Liz Hutchison]

How do you rate a book like this other than to applaud the author for her bravery.
If I give 1 star it says I didn’t like the book but that’s not correct. If I give 5 stars it says I loved the book and that’s not correct. No amount of stars can reflect how this book comes across as each person reading this story will have their own perception on how it should be rated. For me it’s heart felt pride in the strength shown by Shaneda in writing her story to bring awareness to the reader.

[Tate Francis]

I won’t be rating this one as I didn’t finish it. I may try again in future but with my current mental state, the violence the author endured is too difficult to read. I absolutely commend the author for her strength and aspire to one day have half the stoicism in the face of adversity that she possesses.

[Kirjamonsteri · Rating 4 out of 5]

Voiko olla enää alhaisempaa ihmissaastaa kuin isä, joka raiskaa oman tyttärensä päivittäin, joskus useitakin kertoja päivässä, vuosikausien ajan. Seksuaalisen hyväksikäytön uhri joutuu usein elämään hyväksikäytöstä aiheutuneiden traumojen ja oireiden kanssa koko loppuelämänsä, kun taas hyväksikäyttäjä on (mahdollisen vankilatuomion jälkeen) vapaa.

[Gail murray · Rating 5 out of 5]

Graphic gripping good page Turner

[Emma Holden · Rating 5 out of 5]

Had me hooked from start to finish. A harrowing read but an inspirational one at that!

[Sian Barry · Rating 3 out of 5]

Sad story. I admire the authors resilience. Struggled a little with the writing/grammar. Happy that the author survived and is able to use her story to empower and support others!