The Heart of Grief: Death and the Search for Lasting Love

by Thomas Attig

In The Heart of Grief , Attig gives us an inspiring and profoundly insightful meditation on the meaning of grief, showing how it can be the path toward a lasting love of those who have died. Recounting dozens of stories of people who have struggled with deaths in their lives, he describes grieving as a transition from loving in presence to loving in separation. The thing we long for most--the return of the one who is missing--is the very thing that we can never have, kindling the intense pain of our loss. But Attig argues that we can, in fact, build an enduring, even reciprocal, love, a love that tempers our pain. He tells stories, for instance, of a young girl taking some of her dead sister's practical advice as she enters high school, a widower realizing how much intimate life with his wife has colored his character, and an athlete drawing inspiration from his dead brother and achieving what they had dreamed of together. Far from forgetting our loved ones, Attig urges us
to explore ways in which our memories of the departed can be sustained, our understanding of them enhanced, and their legacies embraced, so they continue to play active roles in our everyday and inner lives.
Groundbreaking and original, inspiring and compassionate, The Heart of Grief offers guidance, comfort, and a new understanding of how we grieve.

324 pages, Paperback

First published January 1, 2000

Reviews

[Elizabeth · Rating 5 out of 5]

Excellent help for grief support!

[Ericka Clou · Rating 3 out of 5]

Actually it took me nearly five years to decide to stop reading it. It was pretty painful every time I read it. I'm not sure if it helped, but my ability to read some of it at a time was an interesting measure of the progress of my grief. Over five years, I mostly came to the same conclusions as the author, so I do agree with him.

[Liz · Rating 4 out of 5]

Excellent book for someone who has suffered a loss. I particularly enjoyed the stories that started each chapter and that the chapters themselves are so short.