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This Is How I Live Now

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When a high school star suffers an unbelievable tragedy, one misunderstood girl may be the only one who can save him.

Sixteen-year-old Lily Jordan is trying to suppress her tragic past to deal with the unimaginable hurdles of her present. Circumstances no one can ever know. Not that it matters. No one cares about the odd girl who's better off forgotten. She's reminded, though—every day—of the danger she poses, so she stays away from others. She can't be the cause of another tragedy.

Cohen Chambers is a piano prodigy with perfect pitch and a host of admirers. When he's not playing, he's composing songs in his head using the pitches of airplane engines and light bulb hums. Cohen's path has been smooth and steady, but he is about to take the most frightening ride of his life. And he may never be the same.

When the aftermath of Cohen’s terrifying experience threatens to change the course of his life forever, Lily fears she’s to blame and reaches out to him anonymously. Through the course of time, and the exchanging of notes withholding her identity, Lily has to decide if she’s able to look past the danger she poses to help her newfound friend, or stay in the shadows, watching his downfall from afar.

Maybe it’s possible that these unlikely friends may be able to help each other face the mountain of obstacles life has placed in their paths.

271 pages, Kindle Edition

Published April 2, 2022

37 people are currently reading
161 people want to read

About the author

Lesley Larosee

2 books7 followers

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5 stars
35 (39%)
4 stars
29 (32%)
3 stars
14 (15%)
2 stars
10 (11%)
1 star
1 (1%)
Displaying 1 - 11 of 11 reviews
Profile Image for Michael Cook.
Author 6 books37 followers
February 27, 2023
If you read angsty teenage drama this book is for you

Kindle Unlimited. I reviewed this book before giving it for my teenage daughter. It’s a Young Adult (14-18) story but written with dynamic intelligence and realistic dialogue. The pages read more like a diary from a budding author than YA fiction. Lesley Larosee knows how teenager behave, talk, and think. Each chapter alternates between the first-person perspective of the main characters Lily and Cohen. For example, this paragraph highlights her writing style: “Despite my internal plea, he continues, ‘You did this. Remember that.’ With those final words, he leans away from me. The surrounding air lightens, but his words weigh heavily on me.” YA fiction is not my preferred book but I will recommend it to my daughter.
Profile Image for Solara!.
537 reviews109 followers
December 16, 2024
(4.25/5) something about innocent high school romance with a hint of tragedy ALWAYS HITS. idc how old i am i will always go back to it. lilycohen u have my heart❤️
Profile Image for Carol Anne Shaw.
Author 15 books89 followers
April 6, 2022
I was fortunate enough to receive an advanced copy of this book from the author and finished the story in just a couple of days.

Because I am a lover of YA contemporary stories, I was very excited to dive into this story. I was not disappointed.

It is the story of Lily and Cohen, two teenagers who come together at a difficult time in their lives. Unintentionally, Lily and Cohen each become life preservers for the other. In Lily, Cohen finds a much-needed, non-judgemental friend; someone who will listen to him instead of expecting him to conform to the idealized version of "Cohen" that everyone else holds.

In Cohen, Lily finds a friend who encourages her to be her authentic self. Someone who embraces her vulnerability instead of judging her for it. Someone who helps her to see how damaging the beliefs she holds about herself really are.

The story will make your heart ache. You will feel Lily's pain. You will understand Cohen's frustration, and you will be rooting for these two the whole way.

I also loved the music references in this novel, especially the technical ones. The author is a voice coach, and Cohen is an accomplished musician. To express one's emotion using music as a metaphor was/is so clever, and I ended up learning quite a bit about musical structure. Fascinating!

THIS IS HOW I LIVE NOW is a gorgeous debut novel from an author whose storytelling is poignant, haunting, and wonderfully believable. Five stars.
Profile Image for Alison Beechner.
440 reviews8 followers
June 19, 2022
Soooo good! I loved so many things about this one... the heartaches, and the emotion (I totally cried), and how Cohen's sweetness made me swoony.
I wish I had read stuff like this in high school (instead of murder mysteries and historical fiction). Because to answer Lily's question about why all the other students looked past her and didn't care... is because everyone is too self absorbed in their own issues to realize the fronts people put on aren't always the real story. But these aren't things you learn until you're much older. Reading this now, it makes me wonder who I may have overlooked in my giant high school.
1,141 reviews5 followers
July 3, 2024
Beautiful. I just wanted a little more cuteness (loved the brain thing :D).
2 reviews
April 6, 2025
I have read this book 4 times this year already and I am in love with it. It is such a cute book with so much depth and detail.
Profile Image for Bridget.
189 reviews233 followers
December 21, 2024
2/5

I just did not enjoy. The characters were insufferable
Profile Image for Emily Searle.
Author 6 books9 followers
July 19, 2024
It's not a thriller. I keep getting duped by these algorithms and my own not-paying-attention-ness.
Still, this book is tragic and emotional and romantic and I enjoyed it.
Profile Image for Heather Balog.
Author 23 books136 followers
April 9, 2022
I was fortunate enough to read an ARC copy of this book in exchange for an honest review. And my honest review is...WOW. I would have never guessed that this was Lesley Larosse's debut novel. Her ability to create believable teenage characters is truly a gift. I have read quite a lot of YA over the past few years and often times the dialogue between the teens is stilted and unreal. Not the case in this book. The flow between Cohen and Lily kept me interested and invested in both of them from the very first few pages. This novel is a heart-filled portrayal of two teens both experiencing grief for different reasons, but helping each other through it.
Profile Image for Nicole Hanson.
Author 2 books11 followers
July 20, 2022
Once I started reading, I couldn't stop. Lesley did a great job bringing the characters to life that hit all my emotional heartstrings. I smiled, laughed, and cried and truly felt everything the characters were experiencing. Amazing book and a great read.
Displaying 1 - 11 of 11 reviews

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