Algorithms of the Heart: A QAnon Love Story

by Eden Brower

Karen and Gina had the perfect friendship. Until the night Karen clicked on a YouTube video and went spiraling down a rabbit hole of evil pizza and delicious hamberders. Will their friendship survive the coming storm? Or will it dissolve like 17 cakes left out in the rain?

76 pages, Kindle Edition

First published March 24, 2022

About the author

I enjoy reading, writing and playing old time music in my band East River String Band with my husband John Heneghan and our buddy and icon cartoonist Robert Crumb. Not a morning person so don't talk to me until I've had my adrenochrome. Please leave my stuff reviews! I welcome all hate mail. I am really, really weird. And I love you.

Reviews

[John · Rating 5 out of 5]

First I read Moby Dick. Then The Adventures of Huckleberry Finn. Then Little Women, The Lottery and Frankenstein. Mellville. Twain. Alcott, Jackson and Shelley. Then I read Eden Brower’s new novella, “Algorithms of the Heart: A Qanon Love Story" and can state for the record that it is the single greatest American story ever told on paper. Pure reading pleasure.

[Jane Kelton · Rating 5 out of 5]

Biting critique of teenaged girls adrift in the all-consuming wasteland of late-stage capitalism. Richly detailed and revelatory. Who knew that there was a diet-friendly version of pork rinds? Skillful use of the Mean Girl versus her much-abused sidekick Trope familiar to readers of teen fiction, with a shocking Deus-Ex-Machina conclusion to a breathless ride on the Q-Anon Express to the Mall and back. A calorie-free pleasure to read, and apartame-free.

[M. Ditmore]

What a hilarious romp!

[Steven Aloyisus · Rating 5 out of 5]

How does one find words to describe what I have just read? WOWZY! The English language is in need of new superlatives!!!
In a fast-paced 75 pages, Ms Brower explores every emotion one can experience in her characters, be it admiration, adoration, amusement, anger, anxiety, awe, awkwardness, boredom, calmness, confusion, craving, disgust, entrancement, excitement, fear, horror, interest, joy, nostalgia, pain, relief, romance, sadness, satisfaction, sexual desire, surprise, and dozens more! I mean, golly, 'Algorithms of the Heart: A Qanon Love Story' is a really swell book!
It may sound like hyperbole, but I will say it anyway, this is possibly the greatest work of literature in the history of human civilization to this point.
I would be inconsolable if the thought that this might be Ms Brower's only venture into the literary world crept into my now-spinning mind, but the cliffhanger ending leaves us all hope for the future, yes a future in a world with a followup to this masterpiece with characters Gina, Karen, Dumasa, Simp, and the rest of gang!
I rate this book 5 FIERY stars, and 10 JUICY hamberders!

[Martine Blue · Rating 5 out of 5]

2 Baby Thumbs Up!

Judy Blume herself couldn't write a more compelling YA/conspiracy/coming-of-dumb novella if she scribbled it entirely in baby's blood.  Emerging writer Eden Brower knocks her debut novel out of the pizzagate parking lot with unforgivably self-centered characters & and an ending so shocking, your breast friend will have to pry your butt cheeks open with a studded punk rock belt.  "Algorithms Of The Heart:  A Qanon Love Story" contains more Qanon references than a nose swab of cancel coulture & is truely & certifiably LOL hilarious.

Tucker Carlson gives this conspiraromance (is this a new genre??) 5 dopey, perturbed, squeezing-out-a-turd emogis & Margorie Taylor Green gives it 5 Gestapo soups!!

Eden Brower is one of the funniest, most inventive writers I've read in years. Highly recommended!!!

[KennethC · Rating 5 out of 5]

Um..yes, this is 5 stars. But it was hard for me. no worse than Comet Ping Pong or listening to Dan Bongino but then spoiler spoiler spoiler. It helps to quote a review on Amazon: "The lead character is stupid. She is surrounded by people who are, amazingly, much stupider than her. They do stupid things that get stupider throughout."

[Stacey Nodelman · Rating 5 out of 5]

Brilliant! Oddly insightful for such a surreal and absurd book. Like Karen was drawn into the rabbit hole, I was drawn into this tale- and I want to read more!

[Eden Brower]

I wrote this thing of course I am going to give it 5 stars. Did my mother raise a fool? Probably.