Raising Emotionally Healthy Kids: Help for Parents

Raising Kids

by Eliza Huie

The world in which children are growing up is full of uncertainties and challenges. Pressures from peers, pressure to perform or achieve, fears about their life, and stress about the future can trouble young minds. As parents, it can be hard to know how help our children navigate their emotions in an unstable world, while still holding on to hope and truth.
Through six helpful tips, Eliza Huie, experienced parent and Christian counselor, offers practical advice and biblical support for parents seeking to support their children through deep emotional waters. With care, gentleness, and compassion, Eliza explains how parents can give their children grace-filled responses that will point to God’s faithfulness in all the emotional ups and downs of life.

Published in partnership with Biblical Counselling Coalition.

Genres: Parenting

64 pages, Paperback

Published February 15, 2022

Reviews

[Esther Smith · Rating 5 out of 5]

If you are a parent or someone who works with children, you might start this book with any number of questions. How do I manage tantrums in my 2 year old? What does an emotionally healthy 6 or 10 or 14 year old look like? What does Scripture say about my teen’s emotional outbursts?

This is a brief book that may not answer every single one of your questions directly or in detail, but what I found helpful about the book is how it orients you in the right direction, regardless of what your questions might be.

So much wisdom is packed into this little book. No matter the challenges you face, there are reminders to be gracious and understanding, pointers about what you can expect from a child developmentally, and encouragements to offer lasting hope in each interaction you have with your child.

[Megan Smith · Rating 5 out of 5]

I brought this book to be used as a resource to give to parents involved in Children’s Ministry at my church. This book is excellent in a few ways. First of all, it is small and manageable. Parents don’t always have a lot of extra time to read and this is a manageable length. Secondly, this book is packed with great information. It walks a parent through how to support their children in developmentally appropriate ways including giving a quick outline of what emotional issues children are typically dealing with at different development stages. I also love the section on making sure parents are attending to their own emotional health. This book is full of practical tips that are easy to put into practice

[Karla Fernández · Rating 5 out of 5]

Leí la versión en español por Editorial Bautista Independiente (EBI). ¡Chulada de libro! ❤️

[Kelton Zacharias · Rating 5 out of 5]

I plan on putting this in the hands of many parents!

[Chelsey]

This little book by Eliza Huie is one I wish I would have read when my girls were even younger. That being the case, I'm glad that I've read it now. It's never too late to grow as a parent. Whatever the age of your child or grandchild, this book will be a blessing to you. In addition to graciously inviting parents to care and take responsibility for their own emotional well-being, Eliza offers practical wisdom to help parents enter into their child's emotional life with a compassion, curiosity, and grace that reflects that child's unique spiritual and developmental capacity and needs.

[Jennifer]

5 stars for being what’s it’s meant to be. It’s a short book, and I think I highlighted most of it. This feels like a must read to this Christian parent. Spiritual formation and even physical development get most of our attention, but our kids are whole people. We need to love them and nurture them in their emotional selves as well.

[Francesca Du · Rating 4 out of 5]

A little handbook to be read again and again to remind myself of truth and tips.

[Elizabeth · Rating 2 out of 5]

(Somewhere between two and three stars for this one. I didn’t hate it, but I didn’t love it either.)

This brief book outlines six tips for raising emotionally healthy kids which can be seen from the Table of Contents.

1) Nurture them wholly (attending to physical, spiritual, and emotional care)

2) Understand their capacity (for emotional expression at each developmental stage)

3) Regard their feelings (responding with wisdom and gentleness without over/under reacting) -

4) Cultivate lasting hope (ARMS acronym: Assure them of your consistent love, Remind them of God’s faithfulness, Meditate on capital “T” truths with them, Seek to be a blessing)

5) Attend to yourself (because your emotional health matters to your child’s well being since children can perceive the emotional health of their parents)

6) Know when to get help (physical, emotional, & relational signs to help determine if your child’s mental health requires more serious action)

Tip 3 includes some basic conversation starter questions. Tip 4 rightly affirms that the best hope is anchored on the unchanging truth of God’s Word in the Gospel but doesn’t have room to flesh this out much. Tip 5 outlines a 10 Question personal health assessment.

All in all, not an awful book, but too brief to be genuinely helpful or overly insightful, in my opinion. I found “True Feelings” by Carolyn Mahaney & Nicole Whitacre and “Untangling Emotions” by Groves & Smith more illuminating, particularly in how they explain God’s good design and goal for emotions as part of mankind’s image bearing capacity, how emotions have been corrupted by sin, and how they can be redeemed in Christ.

[Connor Kennedy · Rating 2 out of 5]

Not great overall. Although there are some helpful questions and practical suggestions in the pamphlet, it is primarily therapeutic and not distinctively Christian. The author often advocates for parental empathy that is untethered from the Bible’s teaching about sin, idolatry, repentance, and reconciliation with God through the gospel. Rather than encouraging our children to view their emotions as reflections of their hearts before the Lord, which are either soft and worshipful or hard and idolatrous, she advocates that we avoid correcting our children’s emotions for fear of alienating them as they grow. The reader is left with the general impression that most emotions are basically neutral and necessary responses to environmental inputs rather than reflections of their dispositions, either righteous or unrighteous, toward the Lord. The prescription then, according to the author, is mere management rather than encouragement, exhortation, guidance, correction, and discipline.

[Daniel · Rating 5 out of 5]

For as small as it is, this book is helpful, practical. It provides developmentally appropriate questions for guiding different ages and it points parents to trust God in the midst of any emotional distress we or our kids may be going through. The self-assessment of our own emotional health and how it impacts our kids is a good exercise. It’s a good reminder to reflect on how our own emotional health (and decisions we make, within our control) affect other people around us.

[Amanda Nowlin · Rating 3 out of 5]

This quick read was an overview more so than a practical guide, which is what I was looking for. But it is good information and stirred me to evaluate how I have been handling my kids' emotions. Convicted me on where I have been dismissive instead of affirming and loved the reminder that God affirms us over and over of His love for us so we should do the same to our children about ou,r love for them and His.

[Kristen · Rating 4 out of 5]

I gave this book 4 stars because of its brevity and practical tips. Sure, it’s definitely not all- inclusive or even overflowing with things to implement in parenting, but the few tips she includes for each age range I found helpful and intend to use - even used some yesterday during a 7 year old emotional breakdown! Super quick read, worth it if you have a little time.

[Alastair Gooderham · Rating 4 out of 5]

Helpful short primer on engaging with your children and caring for their emotions. Points parents to prayer and God’s wisdom and love.

[Rachel Lundy · Rating 5 out of 5]

This short, but impactful, book is filled with insight and practical tips. If you are a parent, I highly recommend it!

[Andrea Schmitz · Rating 5 out of 5]

Systematic, thorough yet easy to grasp, step through various developmental stages of childhood and how to raise emotionally healthy kids.

Wish I had it before my kids were born.

[Megan (moodreadermusings) · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book by a Christian counselor is a helpful introduction for parents seeking to develop emotional intelligence in their children.