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Resilient
Battling mental illness and addiction, Katherine’s parents are ill-equipped to deal with the trials of raising a family. Their unhappy relationship implodes on Katherine’s last day of first grade, and the abuse and neglect characteristic of her childhood worsens as her family descends further into poverty. With her mother deep in the clutches of alcoholism, her father missing, and her two older brothers already in foster care, Katherine steps in to care for her younger sister, despite being a child herself.
When social services later intervenes, Katherine and her sister are placed in foster care in the countryside. Her new home and the stable and caring environment her foster mother provides are a far cry from the life she’s always known, yet Katherine’s struggles continue. As she approaches adulthood, reeling from her past and battling loneliness, life continues to beat her down with tough choices, staggering betrayals, and various assaults. For a few years, she’s able to cope by suppressing her memories and turning to self-harm and addiction. However, when she pawns her most cherished possession, she realizes that she’s following in her biological parents’ footsteps, tumbling in a downward spiral of self-destruction. Is it too late for her to escape her family’s generational inertia?
Katherine’s story is one of crippling weakness and breathtaking strength, debilitating self-doubt and defiant determination, self-destruction and healing…and the discovery of what it actually means to be resilient.
When social services later intervenes, Katherine and her sister are placed in foster care in the countryside. Her new home and the stable and caring environment her foster mother provides are a far cry from the life she’s always known, yet Katherine’s struggles continue. As she approaches adulthood, reeling from her past and battling loneliness, life continues to beat her down with tough choices, staggering betrayals, and various assaults. For a few years, she’s able to cope by suppressing her memories and turning to self-harm and addiction. However, when she pawns her most cherished possession, she realizes that she’s following in her biological parents’ footsteps, tumbling in a downward spiral of self-destruction. Is it too late for her to escape her family’s generational inertia?
Katherine’s story is one of crippling weakness and breathtaking strength, debilitating self-doubt and defiant determination, self-destruction and healing…and the discovery of what it actually means to be resilient.
435 pages, Kindle Edition
First published August 31, 2021
2 people are currently reading
34 people want to read
About the author
Katherine Turner
8 books38 followersKatherine Turner is an award-winning author, and a life-long reader and writer. She grew up in foster care from the age of eight and is passionate about improving the world through literature, empathy, and understanding. In addition to writing books, Katherine blogs about mental health, trauma, and the need for compassion on her website www.kturnerwrites.com. She lives in northern Virginia with her husband and two children.
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Displaying 1 - 17 of 17 reviews
July 4, 2022
This is a vulnerable and honest memoir from a survivor of horrific abuse. It begins when she is five and goes all the way through her early 20s. She describes her sexual abuse as a child, living in poverty, painful navigation of the foster care system, being repeatedly sexually assaulted in her teens, her self-harm, abortions, and her own sexual behavior. Her honesty is inspiring and a gift. Few would ever admit the experiencing or doing what she does. But this is part of the gift of the book. It is an honest and clear depiction of what trauma is like and what it does to someone. Her refusal to hold back allows those who have no idea what abuse is like to see it accurately and for survivors to see that they are not alone.
What amazed me is Katherine's talent as a writer. The book doesn't read like a simple recounting of key events. It is a living breathing story that made me forget was a memoir because it was so well told.
It is not a story of early struggle followed by victory through their resilience and luck. If you want to read an easy feel-good book, then this is not for you.
Triggers abound in this book, and I honestly had difficulty reading it because of my own abuse. I found myself having to take frequent breaks and read it slowly. If you are sensitive, or a survivor yourself you may need to be aware of this, but don't let it keep you from the book. This is the story of one of our own.
The physical book itself is beautiful, sturdy, and well made. I usually don't comment on the physical nature of the book, but this one surprised and impressed me.
Who should read this book? Read this book if you want an honest and unflinching description of what abuse and trauma do to a person. If you are a survivor then read it so that you know you are not alone. If you are a pastor or someone who works and serves survivors then you should read it to get a better idea of what people experience. The greatest gift of this book is the reminder that you are not alone.
What amazed me is Katherine's talent as a writer. The book doesn't read like a simple recounting of key events. It is a living breathing story that made me forget was a memoir because it was so well told.
It is not a story of early struggle followed by victory through their resilience and luck. If you want to read an easy feel-good book, then this is not for you.
Triggers abound in this book, and I honestly had difficulty reading it because of my own abuse. I found myself having to take frequent breaks and read it slowly. If you are sensitive, or a survivor yourself you may need to be aware of this, but don't let it keep you from the book. This is the story of one of our own.
The physical book itself is beautiful, sturdy, and well made. I usually don't comment on the physical nature of the book, but this one surprised and impressed me.
Who should read this book? Read this book if you want an honest and unflinching description of what abuse and trauma do to a person. If you are a survivor then read it so that you know you are not alone. If you are a pastor or someone who works and serves survivors then you should read it to get a better idea of what people experience. The greatest gift of this book is the reminder that you are not alone.
January 15, 2022
My last review from 2021 has taken a long time to write because I needed time to put my thoughts together. This is the most vulnerable memoir I have ever read.
In her memoir, Katherine Turner bravely faces difficult memories from her past to cover topics such as race, poverty, addiction, abuse, and child sexual abuse. Eventually, she and her sister are placed in a foster home in the countryside, but it’s clear that there are faults in the system.
In resilient, each chapter starts with a quote about trauma, childhood, sexual assault, etc. I really loved seeing which quote Turner chose to represent each chapter. resilient is visceral, graphic, and courageous. It shows the emotional impact of so many things on a child. It talks about emotional processing for guilt, confusion, anger, and disgust. I absolutely loved Turner’s symbol of “electricity” for fear and anxiety.
I sprinted through the first half, until everything caught up to me and I could only digest small portions at a time. My advice- take it slow.
LOTS of trigger warnings for this one:
Self harm, suicide, rape, abortion, drug use, child abuse, CSA
I will never think about the word resilient in the same way again. I felt honored to read every word.
I will definitely be reading Turner’s next memoir, which picks up where resilient left off- due in 2023.
5 STARS ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️
(Note: thank you to the author for providing a copy in exchange for an honest review.)
In her memoir, Katherine Turner bravely faces difficult memories from her past to cover topics such as race, poverty, addiction, abuse, and child sexual abuse. Eventually, she and her sister are placed in a foster home in the countryside, but it’s clear that there are faults in the system.
In resilient, each chapter starts with a quote about trauma, childhood, sexual assault, etc. I really loved seeing which quote Turner chose to represent each chapter. resilient is visceral, graphic, and courageous. It shows the emotional impact of so many things on a child. It talks about emotional processing for guilt, confusion, anger, and disgust. I absolutely loved Turner’s symbol of “electricity” for fear and anxiety.
I sprinted through the first half, until everything caught up to me and I could only digest small portions at a time. My advice- take it slow.
LOTS of trigger warnings for this one:
Self harm, suicide, rape, abortion, drug use, child abuse, CSA
I will never think about the word resilient in the same way again. I felt honored to read every word.
I will definitely be reading Turner’s next memoir, which picks up where resilient left off- due in 2023.
5 STARS ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️
(Note: thank you to the author for providing a copy in exchange for an honest review.)
August 31, 2021
The life Katherine was born into in 1984 wasn’t easy. As she explains at the beginning of resilient, her parents were ill-equipped for adulthood, let alone parenting. And when their issues—mental illness, addiction, and trauma of their own—started to interfere with their ability to care for Katherine and her siblings, life only became harder. Poverty worsened. Addictions worsened. Twice before her tenth birthday, Katherine was sexually abused.
When foster care intervened, although Katherine was placed into a safe, loving home, the journey she’d been forced to walk in early childhood didn’t suddenly change. Instead, her teen years were spent surviving further violence, including multiple sexual assaults, self-harm, and addictive tendencies of her own.
Through it all, Katherine was told she was resilient—for surviving so much, for performing academically as well as she did, and simply for the sake of being a kid, because “kids are so resilient,” as many quickly say, without acknowledging what that child may have survived. The word “resilient” started to mean something else to Katherine entirely, and over the years, she came to resent the term. resilient is her story of how that resentment came to be…and how that resentment finally turned in to a resilience all her own.
It would be easy for me to say I love this book so much because I’m biased, because I was one of the editors for the book. resilient first came to my desk in January of 2021, and Katherine and I worked through multiple rounds of edits together. Then, I helped her with the marketing plan for it. I think I’ve read the book six times in less than nine months, cover-to-cover, if not a couple more. And every time I read it, I find something else I love about it.
resilient is so much more than a memoir. It’s a guiding light. Like the butterfly on the cover—a creature that emerges from darkness into something beautiful—resilient is a symbol of hope to all of us who have survived those things that so many would prefer us to keep shrouded in darkness. Childhood abuse and neglect. Sexual violence. Poverty. Addiction. Depression, suicide attempts, and that aching loneliness and sense of failure that plagues many of us. Reading the story of how Katherine survived all of that and more, and then found the courage to write about it, sharing her story in the simple hope that it might be reassuring to someone else—that it might tell someone else they aren’t alone—is wholly inspirational.
It’s the book that every single person needs to read. Survivors, allies of survivors, those who work in trauma, and those who only know “trauma” as a word other people use. Of all the memoirs of survival I’ve read, resilient is the greatest telling of stories that should never remain untold.
When foster care intervened, although Katherine was placed into a safe, loving home, the journey she’d been forced to walk in early childhood didn’t suddenly change. Instead, her teen years were spent surviving further violence, including multiple sexual assaults, self-harm, and addictive tendencies of her own.
Through it all, Katherine was told she was resilient—for surviving so much, for performing academically as well as she did, and simply for the sake of being a kid, because “kids are so resilient,” as many quickly say, without acknowledging what that child may have survived. The word “resilient” started to mean something else to Katherine entirely, and over the years, she came to resent the term. resilient is her story of how that resentment came to be…and how that resentment finally turned in to a resilience all her own.
It would be easy for me to say I love this book so much because I’m biased, because I was one of the editors for the book. resilient first came to my desk in January of 2021, and Katherine and I worked through multiple rounds of edits together. Then, I helped her with the marketing plan for it. I think I’ve read the book six times in less than nine months, cover-to-cover, if not a couple more. And every time I read it, I find something else I love about it.
resilient is so much more than a memoir. It’s a guiding light. Like the butterfly on the cover—a creature that emerges from darkness into something beautiful—resilient is a symbol of hope to all of us who have survived those things that so many would prefer us to keep shrouded in darkness. Childhood abuse and neglect. Sexual violence. Poverty. Addiction. Depression, suicide attempts, and that aching loneliness and sense of failure that plagues many of us. Reading the story of how Katherine survived all of that and more, and then found the courage to write about it, sharing her story in the simple hope that it might be reassuring to someone else—that it might tell someone else they aren’t alone—is wholly inspirational.
It’s the book that every single person needs to read. Survivors, allies of survivors, those who work in trauma, and those who only know “trauma” as a word other people use. Of all the memoirs of survival I’ve read, resilient is the greatest telling of stories that should never remain untold.
August 7, 2021
I've been following Katherine Turner's path for healing and overcoming trauma through her books — 'Finding Annie' and 'Moments of Extraordinary Courage' — and also through her essays on her website. So, before starting 'Resilient', I knew it would portray several terrible moments of her life, but I truly couldn't foreseeing the deepness and rawness of her experiences. Katherine is a master of words and everything that is written in this book takes us, readers, right there into the scenes. It can be hard sometimes, but it also serves the purpose of making us understand what it means to be a victim of many kinds of abuse—and, ultimately, what means to be a survivor.
'Resilient' is a collection of experiences that show us with clarity where our society is failing, especially to our kids. If solving all the problems is not an easy task, though, Katherine Turner shows us that healing one person at a time, at least, has already a big impact on the next generations.
Ultimately, 'Resilient' is an ode to the strength of spirit and determination to face uncomfortable truths and rewrite one's path.
'Resilient' is a collection of experiences that show us with clarity where our society is failing, especially to our kids. If solving all the problems is not an easy task, though, Katherine Turner shows us that healing one person at a time, at least, has already a big impact on the next generations.
Ultimately, 'Resilient' is an ode to the strength of spirit and determination to face uncomfortable truths and rewrite one's path.
December 28, 2021
Turner's memoir is a gut-wrenching must-read for any sexual trauma survivor. Written with such raw, painstaking detail, you feel every one of her memories come to life.
There are quite a few uncomfortable scenes that beg you to keep turning the page. I saw myself and my own personal experiences on many pages. This book was very hard to put down.
If you're a survivor, you're sure to feel less alone due to this very important read.
There are quite a few uncomfortable scenes that beg you to keep turning the page. I saw myself and my own personal experiences on many pages. This book was very hard to put down.
If you're a survivor, you're sure to feel less alone due to this very important read.
December 17, 2021
Resilient is a memoir of extraordinary power. It educates and challenges the reader on every level, pulling you in deeper with every page, until the realization hits: You can’t stop reading this harrowing and gorgeous story, and you’ll be devastated when it ends. I truly believe Resilient should be required reading for every person interested in any form of advocacy in our current tumultuous times.
August 31, 2021
This is the book you should read if you are a birth parent, foster parent, gre up with abuse, poverty, or any of the other adverse situations that cause trigger warnings.
Katherine gives us just glimpses into her growing up but does in such a way you can hardly put the book down. Will she make it? What else could possibly happen? Very early on you start rooting for her and groaning at decisions made and opportunities missed.
She is hardest on herself but always gives the benefit of the doubt to others. As a foster/ adoptive mom who grew up with addictions and abuse and chronic illnesses i was far harder on the adults in my life.
I have new insight and empathy for my kids. It's complicated could not be truer.
Resilient my be the title but Survivor is what she is.
I was given this book as a free ARC from BookSirens. I highly reccomend this one as not to be missed.
Katherine gives us just glimpses into her growing up but does in such a way you can hardly put the book down. Will she make it? What else could possibly happen? Very early on you start rooting for her and groaning at decisions made and opportunities missed.
She is hardest on herself but always gives the benefit of the doubt to others. As a foster/ adoptive mom who grew up with addictions and abuse and chronic illnesses i was far harder on the adults in my life.
I have new insight and empathy for my kids. It's complicated could not be truer.
Resilient my be the title but Survivor is what she is.
I was given this book as a free ARC from BookSirens. I highly reccomend this one as not to be missed.
August 3, 2021
What an amazingly honest and open book that totally blew my mind! I couldn’t put it down. I don’t usually read book about this type of abuse because I find it heartbreaking and overwhelmingly sad.
This book was both of those things and a whole host of other things. It was funny, insightful, gritty, brutal and totally honest. Katherine you are a truly special person to be able to be totally on show “warts & all” but still manage to tell your story without self pity or blaming everyone around you. Absolutely lots of people around you should have picked up on your clues - but human nature is to ignore or not see what is painful or so awful it’s beyond comprehension.
I loved the gritty but sometimes gut wrenching honesty in this book. The descriptive way the author described what was happening both mentally and physically. I laughed, cried and felt both revulsion and great pride for Katherine at times while reading this story. There were times where I wanted to scream at both the younger Katherine when she took the same destructive paths again and again and the older Katherine when she put up with some much abuse from her situation.
I come from the U.K. and when I read about her injuries from the tree and that the lack of medical insurance heaping even more misery (& debt) onto the situation - I was eternally grateful to the NHS!
Reading the last parts regarding the elastic band and the pipe cleaner was totally inspiring - what a fantastic way to make people understand the aftermath of trauma and hopefully a more constructive way forward.
Absolutely brilliant - awesome, well written and educational - and can’t wait for the next book.
I received an advance review copy for free, and I am leaving this review voluntarily.
This book was both of those things and a whole host of other things. It was funny, insightful, gritty, brutal and totally honest. Katherine you are a truly special person to be able to be totally on show “warts & all” but still manage to tell your story without self pity or blaming everyone around you. Absolutely lots of people around you should have picked up on your clues - but human nature is to ignore or not see what is painful or so awful it’s beyond comprehension.
I loved the gritty but sometimes gut wrenching honesty in this book. The descriptive way the author described what was happening both mentally and physically. I laughed, cried and felt both revulsion and great pride for Katherine at times while reading this story. There were times where I wanted to scream at both the younger Katherine when she took the same destructive paths again and again and the older Katherine when she put up with some much abuse from her situation.
I come from the U.K. and when I read about her injuries from the tree and that the lack of medical insurance heaping even more misery (& debt) onto the situation - I was eternally grateful to the NHS!
Reading the last parts regarding the elastic band and the pipe cleaner was totally inspiring - what a fantastic way to make people understand the aftermath of trauma and hopefully a more constructive way forward.
Absolutely brilliant - awesome, well written and educational - and can’t wait for the next book.
I received an advance review copy for free, and I am leaving this review voluntarily.
August 8, 2021
Raw, honest, beautiful, and educational.
I’ve been following the author since she launched her first book—Finding Annie—so I was already familiar with her talent.
Katherine’s voice takes us into the narrative, we feel what she feels, and we see what she sees.
With that in mind, I knew that this reading would be intense. And I was ready for the journey! Well… it turned out I wasn't that ready (in a positive way). I had to stop the reading a few times because I wished I could enter the book and tell young Katherine that it wasn’t her fault! I wanted to hug her and say how sorry I—as part of this society—was for failing with her and many other children that most times don’t even get the chance to speak up and tell their truth.
“Resilient” is intense like that! But it is also a lesson about love, healing, and finding your inner strength!
All the praise for Katherine and her beautiful work.
I’ve been following the author since she launched her first book—Finding Annie—so I was already familiar with her talent.
Katherine’s voice takes us into the narrative, we feel what she feels, and we see what she sees.
With that in mind, I knew that this reading would be intense. And I was ready for the journey! Well… it turned out I wasn't that ready (in a positive way). I had to stop the reading a few times because I wished I could enter the book and tell young Katherine that it wasn’t her fault! I wanted to hug her and say how sorry I—as part of this society—was for failing with her and many other children that most times don’t even get the chance to speak up and tell their truth.
“Resilient” is intense like that! But it is also a lesson about love, healing, and finding your inner strength!
All the praise for Katherine and her beautiful work.
December 16, 2021
In her gripping memoir, resilient, Katherine Turner reveals the raw details of her traumatic childhood and youth in such a way that I could not put this book down. Katherine articulately describes her experiences with molestation, sexual assault, rape, neglect, and poverty, bringing you directly alongside her to share in every feeling and emotion. Reminding myself that this is no story, but a real-life narrative of events no person should ever have to endure. Katherine attempts to bury her suffering at any chance she can, only for it to manifest itself in self-harm, suicidal thoughts, self-blame, and impaired decision-making. Though her words are tough to read at times, Katherine reminds us all that we are not alone. As survivors of intense trauma, we are resilient in our many different ways and it certainly does not have to fit the textbook definition. She reminds us that our trauma does not have to define us, but that it is a part of who we are, not to be shamed and brushed under the rug. Resilient is powerful, life-changing, and will help so many. It will stick with me for the rest of my life.
April 3, 2023
I truly enjoyed reading this despite the emotional weight of the author’s childhood. Well written and engaging. A few parts were long and very detailed, but it showed the author wrote this for herself not for her audience. A big part of why it was so good.
Recommended For: Those who enjoy memoirs and stories of resilience.
Recommended For: Those who enjoy memoirs and stories of resilience.
March 15, 2023
I got this book due to the title, "RESILIENT." It takes a lot to be a resilient woman. It's something we are taught and practice on a daily. With pain comes resilience, which is what my therapist once told me.
When I started reading this book, I had no clue what was inside the pages, and then wow!!!! It touched me in many ways.
This memoir is about a survivor who had a lot of abuse from a young age to her 20s. Sexually abused, poverty, foster care system, self-harm, and abortion. She was so authentic in this memoir that I found myself shedding tears as many of these topics hit home to me. Many people don't realize how trauma affects people and how. We have dealt with it for many years, and the pain from those painful moments never goes away. We become more robust and learn to deal with our emotions.
I loved this book, and It was an honor to read someone else's story, which went through some of the same tribulations I have dealt with. We are not alone <3
Recommended: to anyone who wants authenticness, a therapist, or a mentor to people who have dealt with trauma, and if you are a survivor of any type of abuse, this one is for you. We stand together
When I started reading this book, I had no clue what was inside the pages, and then wow!!!! It touched me in many ways.
This memoir is about a survivor who had a lot of abuse from a young age to her 20s. Sexually abused, poverty, foster care system, self-harm, and abortion. She was so authentic in this memoir that I found myself shedding tears as many of these topics hit home to me. Many people don't realize how trauma affects people and how. We have dealt with it for many years, and the pain from those painful moments never goes away. We become more robust and learn to deal with our emotions.
I loved this book, and It was an honor to read someone else's story, which went through some of the same tribulations I have dealt with. We are not alone <3
Recommended: to anyone who wants authenticness, a therapist, or a mentor to people who have dealt with trauma, and if you are a survivor of any type of abuse, this one is for you. We stand together
January 31, 2023
A Book Everyone Should Read
I don't know if I can review this book in 20 words or less. This is the best book I have read. It was difficult to read and at times I had to put it down for a few hours sometimes a few days. I want everyone to know these traumas exists in families. I know it's hard to face and we opt for the Rose Color glasses as my Mom did, but as hard as it is and before we can help in even a small way we have to recognize these astrocytes happen to people and the effect is so traumatic it causes life changing decesions, drug use, inflicting self pain, suicidal thoughts and attempts, and even suicide, fear, self loathing and shame and blame of oneself. I could go on but read the book and you will understand. Systems have to change.
I don't know if I can review this book in 20 words or less. This is the best book I have read. It was difficult to read and at times I had to put it down for a few hours sometimes a few days. I want everyone to know these traumas exists in families. I know it's hard to face and we opt for the Rose Color glasses as my Mom did, but as hard as it is and before we can help in even a small way we have to recognize these astrocytes happen to people and the effect is so traumatic it causes life changing decesions, drug use, inflicting self pain, suicidal thoughts and attempts, and even suicide, fear, self loathing and shame and blame of oneself. I could go on but read the book and you will understand. Systems have to change.
February 23, 2023
What an extremely difficult yet utterly important book. I lived the other side of this story as a Social Worker and former foster parent and feel that it is important for people to learn about children who experience these situations. Katherine Turner shares her experiences and by doing so, I think that this story could absolutely help others realize that they are not alone. Thanks #NetGalley #JoshaPublishing
June 24, 2023
"Resilient” is a brilliantly written and unexpectedly raw account of Turner’s childhood and teenage years, which were filled to the brim with just about every type of abuse, neglect and dysfunction that would blow the lid off any Adverse Childhood Experience (ARE) self-test.
Her story is the definition of a difficult childhood and at the same time is a handbook for helping readers truly understand the effects of early trauma and resulting Complex-PTSD (Post Traumatic Stress Disorder) on the rest of a survivor’s life.
Turner writes from the self-awareness of middle adulthood after much processing, and is brutally honest about her sexual and physical abuse, early poverty and hunger, and being traumatized during the court process removing her from her mother’s care, as well as the resulting fallout when placed in a relatively stable foster-care situation afterward. It was a fallout filled with the insecurity and loneliness of not understanding her own self-worth, trust and relationship issues, and coping behaviors that included self-harm. And she endured additional sexual violations, including rape, in her teenage years.
It is the incredible honesty in her writing that both educates and engages, and the book will help effect change and validate so many because she’s raised a mirror for survivors of childhood sexual abuse to see themselves reflected. This is a gift.
She writes what are sometimes hard-to-read scenes, things that society and families want to shove under a rug, and I applaud her for letting us into this world in a very intimate way. This kind of openness takes great courage and vulnerability and is so important. She answers the age-old query, “If not me, who?” loudly and with thundering reverberation.
I believe what adds to the success of this memoir was Turner’s early attraction to and love of writing and literature, which she talks about a lot in this book, and the resulting writing ability she has honed. She’s simply great at her craft, and was aided by vivid and specific memories (and perhaps diaries/journals?) from her childhood that allow for extremely descriptive storytelling and dialogue. Each chapter feels like its own story, and her chosen writing style means the book reads and flows like a novel in many parts. And while Turner has decidedly her own voice, her writing at times reminds me of the master memoirist Mary Karr’s prose.
Because of the strength of her writing and with its unhurried details, I felt like I was right with young Katherine as she experienced each age and life event chronicled in her book.
I felt empathy for her in each abusive, familial, relational, foster-care and school story she told; cheered for her during incredible self-discovery and growth; in my head yelled, “NO, don’t do that!” and “I’m so, so sorry!” many times; and commiserated with her for the anguish we all can understand from childhood (and even in an adulthood of recovery), which she translates so simply: “No one really loves me. No one understands me, not really.” This gets to the heart of trauma.
By telling her story, Turner helps each of us on our own healing journeys because I would dare to say each of us can find bits of our experiences, emotions, pain, self-doubt, and growth reflected in hers.
Her story is the definition of a difficult childhood and at the same time is a handbook for helping readers truly understand the effects of early trauma and resulting Complex-PTSD (Post Traumatic Stress Disorder) on the rest of a survivor’s life.
Turner writes from the self-awareness of middle adulthood after much processing, and is brutally honest about her sexual and physical abuse, early poverty and hunger, and being traumatized during the court process removing her from her mother’s care, as well as the resulting fallout when placed in a relatively stable foster-care situation afterward. It was a fallout filled with the insecurity and loneliness of not understanding her own self-worth, trust and relationship issues, and coping behaviors that included self-harm. And she endured additional sexual violations, including rape, in her teenage years.
It is the incredible honesty in her writing that both educates and engages, and the book will help effect change and validate so many because she’s raised a mirror for survivors of childhood sexual abuse to see themselves reflected. This is a gift.
She writes what are sometimes hard-to-read scenes, things that society and families want to shove under a rug, and I applaud her for letting us into this world in a very intimate way. This kind of openness takes great courage and vulnerability and is so important. She answers the age-old query, “If not me, who?” loudly and with thundering reverberation.
I believe what adds to the success of this memoir was Turner’s early attraction to and love of writing and literature, which she talks about a lot in this book, and the resulting writing ability she has honed. She’s simply great at her craft, and was aided by vivid and specific memories (and perhaps diaries/journals?) from her childhood that allow for extremely descriptive storytelling and dialogue. Each chapter feels like its own story, and her chosen writing style means the book reads and flows like a novel in many parts. And while Turner has decidedly her own voice, her writing at times reminds me of the master memoirist Mary Karr’s prose.
Because of the strength of her writing and with its unhurried details, I felt like I was right with young Katherine as she experienced each age and life event chronicled in her book.
I felt empathy for her in each abusive, familial, relational, foster-care and school story she told; cheered for her during incredible self-discovery and growth; in my head yelled, “NO, don’t do that!” and “I’m so, so sorry!” many times; and commiserated with her for the anguish we all can understand from childhood (and even in an adulthood of recovery), which she translates so simply: “No one really loves me. No one understands me, not really.” This gets to the heart of trauma.
By telling her story, Turner helps each of us on our own healing journeys because I would dare to say each of us can find bits of our experiences, emotions, pain, self-doubt, and growth reflected in hers.
May 3, 2023
Katherine Turner’s resilient memoir is a powerful and candid account of her journey through a childhood marked by abuse, neglect, mental illness, addiction, and poverty. Turner’s story begins with her parents’ struggles with addiction and her father’s frequent absence from her life due to work. Tragically, her childhood was plagued with sexual abuse and emotional trauma, and she did not receive the love and care that she needed. Following her parents’ separation and her mother’s rehab, Turner and her sister were placed in foster care, and at a young age, Turner had to become a parent to her little sister while navigating her own trauma. Though her new home provided a stable and caring environment, Turner continued to struggle with the traumas of her past, loneliness, and difficult choices. In her efforts to cope, she turned to self-harm and addiction, ultimately realizing she was following in her biological parents’ footsteps.
resilient is a profoundly moving and candid memoir that captivated me from beginning to end. Turner’s vivid descriptions and raw vulnerability took me through a range of emotions as I followed her story of struggle and shame. Turner’s storytelling is both heart-wrenching and inspiring, highlighting the immense strength required to overcome one’s past and build a better future. This book is not an easy read, but it is important. Turner’s experiences shed light on the need to listen to abuse victims and provide support during difficult times. Her honesty and bravery in sharing her story are commendable, and her resolve is genuinely inspiring. resilient offers an unflinching look at the effects of abuse, neglect, and addiction on a person’s life and touches on themes of trauma, healing, growth, and resilience.
The memoir, resilient, is a touching and inspirational story about survival and overcoming the obstacles that life hands you. I highly recommend this book to anyone seeking a poignant and thought-provoking read that showcases the strength of the human spirit in overcoming adversity.
resilient is a profoundly moving and candid memoir that captivated me from beginning to end. Turner’s vivid descriptions and raw vulnerability took me through a range of emotions as I followed her story of struggle and shame. Turner’s storytelling is both heart-wrenching and inspiring, highlighting the immense strength required to overcome one’s past and build a better future. This book is not an easy read, but it is important. Turner’s experiences shed light on the need to listen to abuse victims and provide support during difficult times. Her honesty and bravery in sharing her story are commendable, and her resolve is genuinely inspiring. resilient offers an unflinching look at the effects of abuse, neglect, and addiction on a person’s life and touches on themes of trauma, healing, growth, and resilience.
The memoir, resilient, is a touching and inspirational story about survival and overcoming the obstacles that life hands you. I highly recommend this book to anyone seeking a poignant and thought-provoking read that showcases the strength of the human spirit in overcoming adversity.
March 26, 2024
You are resilient
It was heartbreaking to read her story. So many emotions ran through me. At times I wanted to speak directly to her and tell her to fight, to resist or to run at all costs. Thank you for sharing your story. I am sure doing so forced you to live through it all again. You are a survivor and this book is must read for all that have suffered abuse!
It was heartbreaking to read her story. So many emotions ran through me. At times I wanted to speak directly to her and tell her to fight, to resist or to run at all costs. Thank you for sharing your story. I am sure doing so forced you to live through it all again. You are a survivor and this book is must read for all that have suffered abuse!
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