You're Gonna Miss Me Someday: A Memoir

by Ken Gagne

Only by knowing your family can you know yourself.Only by hearing their stories can you tell your own. But what if those stories are incomplete or were never told at all? What if your family hid half the pieces to the puzzle you’ve spent a lifetime trying to assemble? What then?When they sent their severely disabled sixteen-month-old twin sons to live in a state-run institution, Bob and Cindy Gagne made an unspoken pact to lock away the pain. In the years to follow, they raised their three “replacement children” under a shadow of silence, where no one talked about the past. After his mother and father died, taking their stories with them, author Ken Gagne realized he’d lost more than his parents. He also lost the chance to find out who they really were and finally learn the truth about the twins. Most of all, he lost his last chance to find himself. Or so he thought.In his memoir, You’re Gonna Miss Me Someday, a raw and uncompromising journey of self-discovery, equal parts heartbreaking and humorous, Gagne dives into a well of yesterdays, constructed more of myth than memory, and recreates the family history he never knew. Adding fictional flesh to factual bone, he’s penned a love letter to the people and places that made reflections on coming of age in small-town Western Massachusetts; bonding with the brothers he always wanted while working for the NBA; and burying his parents before he could apologize for failing them.This is a tale of time waned and wasted, an ode to ticking clocks and the turning of seasons, a sonnet of regret and forgiveness that will resonate with anyone who’s ever wished for another chance.

Kindle Edition

Published July 18, 2021

Reviews

[Samm · Rating 5 out of 5]

This touching story was truly written from the heart and soul of the author. I love his imaginative writing style, which incredibly helps fill in every detail of his childhood with raw and emotional story telling. I don’t typically write reviews on Goodreads, but this memoir hit different and felt much more personal and real than most of the other novels sitting on my shelf.

“You’re gonna miss me someday” captures some of the darker sides of Ken’s family’s story, but through his personal reflections and storytelling ability he is able to process and forgive for the traumas that he’s carried with him into adulthood. Reading this book personally helped me reflect on many of my own childhood memories and is a reminder that even through the struggles most families have to endure, we all, including our parents, are just human beings with struggles and traumas of our own. I particularly enjoyed the epilogue in which Ken finds additional closure by imagining multiple realities in which life could have played out if things worked out differently - a coping mechanism used by many of us, but can help find validation and closure in given situations.

[Mary Ellen · Rating 5 out of 5]

I loved this memoir by Ken Gagne. There's so much here to enjoy - I loved reading about Kenny the kid (sports freak on the straight & narrow) and I 100% empathize about trying to be the perfect child. I loved the wistful need to figure out his mom & dad as people. Piecing together bits of family history - guessing other parts.

He is always yearning to be the perfect son. His parents pass away before he realizes that he is achieving what his parents would have wished for him. We are always hardest on ourselves - Ken's memoir reminds me to be kinder to myself.

My favorite parts: 1) the humor - Ken writes like he speaks, which is hard to do (he's really funny); 2) the reminiscing of growing up in the 70's-80's as a sports fanatic - I grew up with & am currently surrounded by sports fanatics; 3) honoring families - there is no such thing as a perfect family; we are all doing the best we can.

[Dawn Ancelet · Rating 5 out of 5]

A very touching trip down memory lane!

I just finished reading this book, I just couldn't put it down because it all happened while I was a kid growing up and these characters were very real to me since they were my close relatives. I shed many a tear while reading it and I'm sure you will too!! Related to Ken Gagne or not I encourage you to read it, you will not regret it!!

[NICOLE VENTRESCA · Rating 1 out of 5]

Ugh. This book was tragically terrible. It was painful to finish. Don’t waste your time.