Oh boy. Oh boy oh boy oh boy. That's more high ratings than I expected to see. :-0
Okay well, let's see. Number one this is mediocre at the very best. There is nothing, and I do mean nothing, here that separates this story from the rest out there.
I don't like when authors - urban fiction authors to be exact - feel the need to explain their slang. Who do they think is reading their books? A nun? An old white man who has never come closer to a black person than standing in line at the supermarket? Newsflash to the authors: your books are targeting an audience for a reason. Believe it.
Now, different drugs are called different names in all parts of the world. Hell, weed and heroin have about 20 different names each just here in little old Delaware. I've never heard heroin called 'O Wee' and I wouldn't be surprised if I found Ervin made this up for no express purpose. Doesn't matter though. What did matter is that I didn't need 'dope' in parenthesis to make sure I got it.
If you have to add an explanation for something into the story - leave it the hell out. It's better all around.
The editing. Wasn't the worst I've seen, by a long shot, but it's surely is not properly edited. I found numerous mistakes throughout the story like 'wandered' for 'wondered', 'fly the coupe', etc. That's just a pain in the ass to deal with. Especially for someone like me who does read well edited books. I shouldn't have to deal with this. Take some pride in what you put out people.
I think it's real tacky to talk about yourself, your friends, your other books, their other books, etc. in your own story. Tacky, tacky, tacky and classless. A shameless plug. Put in an ad for it in the back if you want to do something. Market some other way. Don't make yourself look like this:
"Girl, you been sleeping, it's this book out called 'Flip Side of the Game' that's killing the game right now."
"The author's name is Tu-Shonda Whitaker. There's also a book out called 'Every Thus Needs a Lady' by Wahida Clark and one called 'Little Ghetto Girl' by Danielle Santiago. I mean. The beginning of Chapter 19 is just plugs for friends. And it's tacky. If I was Whitaker, Clark, or Santiago I'd be pissed. I wouldn't even want mention like that. My God. Have some class.
Ervin, did they mention you in their books? Hmmmm. (And, if they did, they need to take a class or two in tackiness themselves.)