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Grief Is a Dancer
With her bracing storytelling, Bair shows what it’s like for her family to seek equilibrium after their unspeakable loss of 8-year-old Kelly. Bair proposes that grief is an intuitive, loving, life-long partner in sorrow, not something to “get over.”
160 pages, Paperback
Published April 6, 2021
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Displaying 1 - 1 of 1 review
April 11, 2021
It's hard to say you "liked" or "enjoyed" a book about this topic. I lived in the same area as the writer and her family and attended the same church for a time, so I was familiar with their story and the people and places she mentioned.
I read the first book ("A Table for Two") about her daughter's illness and passing, and this is the follow up to it. The first one, I had to read several times, because in a way, to me, it seemed unbelievable. First, that an 8 year old could think and write like an adult about spiritual matters. She seemed to be wiser than her age, and maybe she was, after going through all she did. In the first book, it seemed as though everything was neatly tied up with a Christian bow at the end, that it was accepted, God's will, life goes on, etc. I could never fathom the family eating a meal after their 8 year old daughter/sister died on the couch next to them, and then let her lay there for hours afterwards. I often wondered, what happened next? how did the different family members handle this? what struggles did they go through, what issues did they deal with?
I was looking for real, and I got it with this second book. Perhaps it was the passage of time giving more wisdom and clarity, getting past the initial stunned part of grieving, but this book rang more true to me. Laying on the couch for hours. Overeating. Wanting to drive your car into another one just to be done with the pain. Being conflicted on her choice of removing the teddy bear from the coffin to keep for themselves. Anger out of nowhere. Questioning God and your lifetime beliefs. These were all honest, real reactions that I think will resonate more with those going through grieving more than a hundred bible verses.
It was enlightening to hear the different family members' reactions over the years as well, and to know that just because you're related doesn't mean you're all going to have the same emotions at the same time or go through the same journey.
I thought she wrote very well and I liked her honesty. There were occasional bits of flowery type language which is not my style, but overall I felt it was well written.
There is no happy ending and I appreciated that as well. Those who are going through or have gone through this will feel a connection.
I read the first book ("A Table for Two") about her daughter's illness and passing, and this is the follow up to it. The first one, I had to read several times, because in a way, to me, it seemed unbelievable. First, that an 8 year old could think and write like an adult about spiritual matters. She seemed to be wiser than her age, and maybe she was, after going through all she did. In the first book, it seemed as though everything was neatly tied up with a Christian bow at the end, that it was accepted, God's will, life goes on, etc. I could never fathom the family eating a meal after their 8 year old daughter/sister died on the couch next to them, and then let her lay there for hours afterwards. I often wondered, what happened next? how did the different family members handle this? what struggles did they go through, what issues did they deal with?
I was looking for real, and I got it with this second book. Perhaps it was the passage of time giving more wisdom and clarity, getting past the initial stunned part of grieving, but this book rang more true to me. Laying on the couch for hours. Overeating. Wanting to drive your car into another one just to be done with the pain. Being conflicted on her choice of removing the teddy bear from the coffin to keep for themselves. Anger out of nowhere. Questioning God and your lifetime beliefs. These were all honest, real reactions that I think will resonate more with those going through grieving more than a hundred bible verses.
It was enlightening to hear the different family members' reactions over the years as well, and to know that just because you're related doesn't mean you're all going to have the same emotions at the same time or go through the same journey.
I thought she wrote very well and I liked her honesty. There were occasional bits of flowery type language which is not my style, but overall I felt it was well written.
There is no happy ending and I appreciated that as well. Those who are going through or have gone through this will feel a connection.
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