Walking with Gay Friends: A Journey Of Informed Compassion

by Alex Tylee

A vital resource to enable Christians to support fellow believers who struggle with their sexuality in their choice of a biblical lifestyle. You want to share the gospel with your gay friend, but don't want to appear insensitive. You want to help a fellow Christian struggling with their sexuality, but don't want to get it wrong. Using real-life stories and biblical teaching, Alex Tylee shows Christians how to love their gay friends with informed compassion. She Does God make people gay? Why does is seem more difficult to share the gospel with gay people? What should I do if my friend starts a gay relationship? By providing answers to these and other questions, Alex helps equip friends, families and the church to reach out.

Genres: Theology, Sexuality, Christian

156 pages, Paperback

First published January 1, 2007

Reviews

[David Campton · Rating 3 out of 5]

My first response is one applauding the courage of Alex Tylee in writing this book in the midst of what is clearly a painful journey for her (a journey that is not yet finished and will be interesting to chart in the future), and for many, many others. There is also a huge sadness at the fact that she actually has to make a plea for compassionate companionship on that journey to members of the church, and particularly those coming from an evangelical position. And that is the another dominant feeling that I have regarding this book. Whilst coming from an unashamedly evangelical, largely literalist view of scripture, and a conservative social perspective, it is profoundly different from the prevailing conservative evangelical voices, coming particularly out of the US (and Africa). This is largely because it is written by someone who is openly gay (though attempting to be celibate) and is not claiming to have known "healing" for their "condition" (whether they want such healing or not). But the lack of Biblical and psycho-biological rigour in this book is frustrating, although it is only 150 pages long... Effectively this book has a relatively narrow target audience, that is, those from an evangelical background, wrestling with the reality of how to build relations with those of a homosexual orientation within and without the church. She does raise some interesting issues towards the end of the book regarding inappropriate/dependent "platonic" friendships that, as she makes clear, can be an issue for heterosexual friendships as well as homosexuals. In conclusion, I was glad I read this book, and especially glad I read it with others because of the honest conversations it promoted. Many more, from whatever theological perspective should read it as it is, as the sub-title puts it, an appeal for "a journey of informed compassion." Whether it is well enough informed, as I have already inferred, is a moot point, but I look forward to seeing where the journey goes.

[Melanie Mead · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book is written by a Christian woman who deals with same-sex atraction. She is honest and real and shares a lot from her personal life experience as well as from the stories of others. I found this book tremendously helpful in terms of becoming more empathetic towards others, getting a real pictures of what is going on in their minds and hearts and learning how we can support them in truth and love. The author lays out the biblical teaching on homosexuality with grace but faithfulness to the Bible. I can't say enough about how valuable this book was to me. We can no longer afford to ignore these issues and I consider this book essential reading for every Christian (especially those involved in church leadership and pastoral care).

[anya · Rating 2 out of 5]

felt like the interviews were quite unbalanced between non-lgbt christians, lgbt non-christians, and lgbt christians, with lgbt christians ultimately having to diminish their lgbt identities for their faith without considering an identity which could accommodate for both aspects. while I appreciate this book is most likely directed towards non-lgbt christians, it would’ve been nice if it could’ve framed lgbt as less as a problem or sin despite initial attempts to present a balanced perspective on homosexuality. I also wonder how it stands to time, especially with discussions around asexuality as most of the book was centred on humans inherently needing physical and sexual relationships, thus deeming it as sinful.

[Deborah · Rating 5 out of 5]

Absolutely brilliant! So clear, insightful, eye-opening and encouraging. I really think this needs to be required reading for every Christian: for those who do have gay friends, and perhaps especially for those who (sadly, like me) don't! Because with the very public debate about gay marriage etc, when often the only thing people hear from Christians is homophobia and misunderstanding, it is so so important that we can think and talk about these issues in a compassionate, gracious and, as Tylee's subtitle spells out, INFORMED way. I am really very grateful to Alex for writing this book, and for inviting me on this journey.

[Scott Kennedy · Rating 3 out of 5]

Picked this up and read it in an afternoon. Obviously very readable!

I was engaged, and learnt a lot. It helped me see how hard the gospel call can be on those who are gay, and gave me important insight into how I can be a good friend and minister those who are gay. Alex does not shy away from the truths of Scripture, but she does so in an understanding way.

Other points she raised were applicable in varied circumstances. I was challenged by her thoughts on incorporating single people into family life, and thinking about how church can cater for and encourage older singles.

Well worth reading.

[Sarah · Rating 4 out of 5]

This is far too complex and emotional for a one paragraph review. Do read and wrestle with it.