4.5 stars
Arvydas--called RV for short is the eldest son of Lithuanian immigrant parents. His parents emigrated when they were barely teens to escape the Soviet occupation and the hard life of the Old Country, but they haven't forgotten their Lith roots. RV and his younger brother Ray have been taught to speak Lithuanian in their home--though Ray rarely does. RV is a bit embarrassed of his parents, to be honest, because their broken English makes them sound illiterate, and RV is really a literate kid. He's been accepted into the Boston Latin School--a high honor--and he loves English probably the most of his classes.
RV has some deep secrets, though, most especially that he likes boys that way he thinks, even though he prays to God about it all the time. He's pretty sure God doesn't hear his prayers, much. RV goes to Lith church and has to hang with Lith kids, including the wealthy sort-of cousins that are some far relation to his mother's family. RV's parents fight a lot, mostly about money, but sometimes about RV and his "odd" ways. RV tries to be as quiet as possible so he won't attract attention. He's close friends with Carole, and army brat who's moved a lot. Carole puts the moves on RV, and he's kinda glad that she is willing to kiss him, but he's not sure about how he feels when they make out. Is it weird that he's sometimes thinking about his biology lab partner, Bobby, who is an attractive, black, super-athlete, when Carole kisses him?
Bobby is new to school and he's friendly with RV, which is so confusing! They hang out at the same pizzeria sometimes, and Bobby is always asking for RV to look over his writing homework--which RV is so happy to do. It gives him more time to hang with Bobby after all. But, as the year wears on RV's feelings about boys are really solidifying. He and Carole aren't really working out. Bobby's dating a really popular girl and RV's dealing with jealousy, struggles at home, and the news that his effeminate Latin teacher has been hospitalized for was seems a gay bashing. Mr. Aniso was "swishy" in a way that RV feared appearing, and his students often made fun of him--RV included. But, RV does see Mr. Aniso's extraordinary bravery, and he's compelled to visit Mr. Aniso in the hospital where he learns about the man, not the teacher. Their visits help RV learn more about himself, too, and Mr. Aniso's ready acceptance of RV's questioning situation provides the support and context that RV really needs.
This coming of age/coming out story is tender and poignant, with a character who had many challenges to discover and overcome. RV's family life is unstable, and his culturally bigoted parents will likely not accept his sexuality. RV's large father, whose temper is often volatile, makes him feel unsafe to live his truth, but he is able to find allies in his life, including Mr. Aniso, Bobby, and Carole. The narrative is told through RV's journal, so readers can be sure they are getting RV's truest thoughts, and accurate representations of his emotional state, even when he's confused and pondering. I honestly adored RV, who is so earnest and so nervous. He's in an almost-constant state of panic, afraid to say the wrong thing to everyone. As his relationships grow, however, he learns who he can trust, and how to navigate the difficult conversations. He gains confidence, and with that comes some sparks of happiness.
I liked how Bobby and RV are able to carefully reveal that they both might like boys to one another, and how they might also like each other in that way. RV's courage, and frustration, help this happen and it works out so well for him. There's a TOUCH of romance here, in the most YA-friendly manner. I would gladly follow RV into more adventures.