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The Choosing: A Dark Christian Fantasy
He’s lost the power to speak. But the authorities will stop at nothing to have him silenced.Britton Donovan is anything but ordinary. A rare soul who can remember life before birth, the brilliant autistic yearns to tell everyone about the supernatural forces he is able to see. But after being rendered mute by a toxic vaccine, the frustrated twenty-year-old fears he’ll never be able to warn the world about the coming spiritual war… until he meets a beautiful specialist whom he recognizes from the realm of light.Asha Levi hates what the country has become. The government mandates remove all “defectives” from society, leaving the otherwise-bubbly therapist depressed and despairing. But when she takes on a voiceless client, the dedicated young woman finds a renewed spark of hope.Improving considerably under his soulmate’s care, Britton feels joy despite the darkness he knows is coming. But just as Asha believes she can restore his dignity, a new law rounds up the neurodivergent, causing him to vanish without a trace.With the fate of humanity hanging in the balance, will this visionary hero survive long enough to protect everyone he loves?The Choosing is the vivid first book in the Chronicles of the Shadowlands new adult fantasy series. If you like underdog champions, embracing destiny, and spiritual warfare, then you’ll adore Teresa Holman’s powerful tale.Read The Choosing to join the fight today!
444 pages, Kindle Edition
Published December 25, 2019
131 people are currently reading
799 people want to read
About the author
Teresa Holman
10 books27 followersTeresa wrote her first story for Readers Digest at the age of 9. (winning $50) Her writing is a wild ride inside a dark world. Nothing thrills her more than the gasp of a reader caught in the shock and trauma of a plot twist. Teresa lives in Texas where she hugs cows and steals eggs from chickens. (that's the chicken's story.)
Believing that truth is best understood inside a story, she catches you when you are not looking. It is her goal that when you close the book you will have a thousand brilliant ideas swirling through your mind.
Believing that truth is best understood inside a story, she catches you when you are not looking. It is her goal that when you close the book you will have a thousand brilliant ideas swirling through your mind.
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Displaying 1 - 16 of 16 reviews
February 20, 2024
Jesus H Christ. Where the fuck to start with this pile of flaming elephant shit the size of god himself. I'm 60 pages into this 440 page book and couldn't possibly slog through another ablistic sentence before writing out my thoughts. I feel like I have to keep reading, and it has nothing to do with being enthralled with the world and plot and characters and more to do with seeing just how many more vehicles can crash and burn in what is already a train wreck with a flaming airplane and a couple casualties burning alive within it.
Christians, I'm not sure how many times I need to say it but here it is again: you are objectively not good writers. Many if not most of your books are predictable. You must always have a sin allegory, a Jesus allegory, a Satan allegory, and, if you're feeling extra suppressed by your own religion, a persecution kink or two and yourself as a self-insert hero (who sometimes has his own real life eldest daughter as the love interest, looking at you Ted Dekker). Many times you're just boring af, retelling what the bible (or narnia) have already said for thousands of years, and that was already bad enough. But then there's the very special books that are downright offensive to the rest of us living several thousand years ahead of you in the current time. The blatant sexism of describing every female character by her figure or role to men, the fundamental misunderstanding of science in order to make researchers out to be the devil, don't even get me started on the usual homophobia, transphobia and racism. But now we have such sheer ignorance of medical science, such a hatred of autism, it feels like Autism Speaks, Trump and Fox News all had a baby and it turned out like Full Metal Alchemist Ed and Al's mom after they tried to bring her resting in peace ass back from the dead.
Firstly, the author can consider herself brave for writing a plot involving vaccines causing autism in a setting with manipulative, angry doctors and a mandatory, government-enforced 'defect screening' for children that is implied to end in abortion if a defect is found. She CAN consider herself brave, but she should instead consider herself weird as hell for being yet another Christian with a persecution kink. Christians, for the love of your own saviour, go wank off. Stop writing whole books about what you wish would happen to you and go have a lovely night to yourself. Keep it in the bedroom, as you always say. She doesn't even bother to be consistent. Not only is Britton, the guy with autism, along with other ND kids, not aborted when they're found to be 'defective', they're literally given the 'defect' by the very people who are screening for 'defects'. I know the government is incompetent, but the least you can do in your persecution novel is actually make them seem frightening.
Second, the god of this book is about as incompetent as the one of the bible. He rules over everything, has a plan for all the spirits, is supposed to be all loving, and yet, he sends these perfectly happy souls out of paradise and down to earth to be tested. Why? For his narcissistic supply--I mean, glory, of course. It literally states when a Tested soul returns, there is a celebration...for god. Because when a child is molested or a woman raped or a person starves, that's just all for his glory. What a great protagonist, said literally no one but the religiously indoctrinated. This book's god and that of the bible are one and the same so I guess it checks out but again, the point is to make a consistent and competent story. If you're just going to make fanfiction of the bible, put it on Wattpad.
Do I even need to say anything about the characters. Britton's personality is autism. That's it. Or whatever tf the author thinks autism is, which is, of course, the stereotypical lights too bright it causes outbursts, slamming heads into walls, seizures and hallucinations. Don't forget the annoyed to death parents.
What a depressing, anger-inducing slog.
Christians, I'm not sure how many times I need to say it but here it is again: you are objectively not good writers. Many if not most of your books are predictable. You must always have a sin allegory, a Jesus allegory, a Satan allegory, and, if you're feeling extra suppressed by your own religion, a persecution kink or two and yourself as a self-insert hero (who sometimes has his own real life eldest daughter as the love interest, looking at you Ted Dekker). Many times you're just boring af, retelling what the bible (or narnia) have already said for thousands of years, and that was already bad enough. But then there's the very special books that are downright offensive to the rest of us living several thousand years ahead of you in the current time. The blatant sexism of describing every female character by her figure or role to men, the fundamental misunderstanding of science in order to make researchers out to be the devil, don't even get me started on the usual homophobia, transphobia and racism. But now we have such sheer ignorance of medical science, such a hatred of autism, it feels like Autism Speaks, Trump and Fox News all had a baby and it turned out like Full Metal Alchemist Ed and Al's mom after they tried to bring her resting in peace ass back from the dead.
Firstly, the author can consider herself brave for writing a plot involving vaccines causing autism in a setting with manipulative, angry doctors and a mandatory, government-enforced 'defect screening' for children that is implied to end in abortion if a defect is found. She CAN consider herself brave, but she should instead consider herself weird as hell for being yet another Christian with a persecution kink. Christians, for the love of your own saviour, go wank off. Stop writing whole books about what you wish would happen to you and go have a lovely night to yourself. Keep it in the bedroom, as you always say. She doesn't even bother to be consistent. Not only is Britton, the guy with autism, along with other ND kids, not aborted when they're found to be 'defective', they're literally given the 'defect' by the very people who are screening for 'defects'. I know the government is incompetent, but the least you can do in your persecution novel is actually make them seem frightening.
Second, the god of this book is about as incompetent as the one of the bible. He rules over everything, has a plan for all the spirits, is supposed to be all loving, and yet, he sends these perfectly happy souls out of paradise and down to earth to be tested. Why? For his narcissistic supply--I mean, glory, of course. It literally states when a Tested soul returns, there is a celebration...for god. Because when a child is molested or a woman raped or a person starves, that's just all for his glory. What a great protagonist, said literally no one but the religiously indoctrinated. This book's god and that of the bible are one and the same so I guess it checks out but again, the point is to make a consistent and competent story. If you're just going to make fanfiction of the bible, put it on Wattpad.
Do I even need to say anything about the characters. Britton's personality is autism. That's it. Or whatever tf the author thinks autism is, which is, of course, the stereotypical lights too bright it causes outbursts, slamming heads into walls, seizures and hallucinations. Don't forget the annoyed to death parents.
What a depressing, anger-inducing slog.
May 31, 2023
This is one of the most powerful books I’ve ever read. It uncovers one’s unrecognized dark thoughts of superiority, inferiority, and stereotypes. It reveals that these are engineered by more than human corruption—they are, in fact, driven by agreements with the forces of darkness, and they are opposed by living truth, Adonai and His angels.
Ephesians 6:12 (NASB 1995) declares: “For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the powers, against the world forces of this darkness, against the spiritual forces of wickedness in the heavenly places.” The battle rages across these pages, and we are immersed in each character’s experience.
A soul who has already overcome the challenges in this world, one who has already entered heaven’s glory, victorious through faith and love, advises: “To enshroud a spirit in flesh is a test all by itself. However, choosing a path your creator has laid out for you is always the best choice. It is your love He desires, above all—the reason for our creation.”
Through the eyes of a mute autistic man, we see plainly the test of life and the spiritual forces engaged in the battle. Those who choose to follow God, El, wrestle against those who follow self-glory, self-recrimination, or the manipulative lies of hell. Like all of us, the characters either repel or embrace the forces of darkness, through either love-drenched faith or the lack of it. Those hate-filled dark ones claim authority over anyone who agrees with their lies, yet the glorious angelic warriors stand for whomever calls on Adonai.
Faith in Adonai is the key. “The problem is, just saying the right words isn’t doing the trick. My spirit has to believe it.”
This book brings spiritual truths to life in riveting narrative, exposing how our modern cultures have chosen to sacrifice the precious lives of those who cannot speak for themselves, in lust for personal profit. This tale boldly portrays how our agreements with evil cause unspeakable agony to both God and man, how our walk with Adonai brings transforming healing and grace. Interspersed with earth experiences are tantalizing interactions with Adonai in GanEden, on the other side of the spiritual veil.
I found myself challenged at three points. First, whom do I look down on in life for their brokenness, and when will I remove that arrogance from my heart? Second, what dark thought patterns have I accepted as my counsellors, negating my life? Finally, whom will I follow: Adonai in His glory and grace, or putrid wickedness?
“… repentance is undoubtedly a potent weapon.”
This is a profound writing. If I could give it six stars, I would!
Ephesians 6:12 (NASB 1995) declares: “For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the powers, against the world forces of this darkness, against the spiritual forces of wickedness in the heavenly places.” The battle rages across these pages, and we are immersed in each character’s experience.
A soul who has already overcome the challenges in this world, one who has already entered heaven’s glory, victorious through faith and love, advises: “To enshroud a spirit in flesh is a test all by itself. However, choosing a path your creator has laid out for you is always the best choice. It is your love He desires, above all—the reason for our creation.”
Through the eyes of a mute autistic man, we see plainly the test of life and the spiritual forces engaged in the battle. Those who choose to follow God, El, wrestle against those who follow self-glory, self-recrimination, or the manipulative lies of hell. Like all of us, the characters either repel or embrace the forces of darkness, through either love-drenched faith or the lack of it. Those hate-filled dark ones claim authority over anyone who agrees with their lies, yet the glorious angelic warriors stand for whomever calls on Adonai.
Faith in Adonai is the key. “The problem is, just saying the right words isn’t doing the trick. My spirit has to believe it.”
This book brings spiritual truths to life in riveting narrative, exposing how our modern cultures have chosen to sacrifice the precious lives of those who cannot speak for themselves, in lust for personal profit. This tale boldly portrays how our agreements with evil cause unspeakable agony to both God and man, how our walk with Adonai brings transforming healing and grace. Interspersed with earth experiences are tantalizing interactions with Adonai in GanEden, on the other side of the spiritual veil.
I found myself challenged at three points. First, whom do I look down on in life for their brokenness, and when will I remove that arrogance from my heart? Second, what dark thought patterns have I accepted as my counsellors, negating my life? Finally, whom will I follow: Adonai in His glory and grace, or putrid wickedness?
“… repentance is undoubtedly a potent weapon.”
This is a profound writing. If I could give it six stars, I would!
January 25, 2024
Excellent read!
Oh my goodness, what a story from beginning to end. A captivating tale that held my attention from the very first paragraph. This story was so well written and it quickly drew me in loving the characters, rooting for them, crying about their situation and crying with them. Teresa Holman, all I can say is well done. I believe God will use this book in the lives of many people. You are a blessing. Can't wait to start the second book, which I will later today.
Oh my goodness, what a story from beginning to end. A captivating tale that held my attention from the very first paragraph. This story was so well written and it quickly drew me in loving the characters, rooting for them, crying about their situation and crying with them. Teresa Holman, all I can say is well done. I believe God will use this book in the lives of many people. You are a blessing. Can't wait to start the second book, which I will later today.
June 28, 2020
One of the most intense books I’ve read. Makes you want to jump into the book and fix the evil yourself, makes you root for the main character “Britton” you cry, pray and jump for joy at the victories. Amazing book.
March 5, 2024
I didn’t know what to expect when I picked up this book but This was a hard book for me to read. I am a Christian and a firm believer in my faith in God and I also acknowledge The evil that the devil and his minions create In this world.
I am also an aunt of an autistic niece. I was hoping this book would give me an insight into what she deals with and what she thinks of since she is also nonverbal. Instead this book made me sad and made me fearful of how people see her. I obviously do not see her as defective nor do I see her being mistreated in this way but this book made me very sad.
Do I find truth in how hateful people in this world, yes I do, but this just broke my heart.
I hope and pray that no one looks at my niece or any other beautiful soul with the hatred that the characters of this book portrayed for Britton. I pray that the families of all children love and protect their children with the faith of Brittons parents.
Nothing against the author or the book, just a hard book for me to read. I’m grateful for the happy ending but the rest was just so hard to take in.
I am also an aunt of an autistic niece. I was hoping this book would give me an insight into what she deals with and what she thinks of since she is also nonverbal. Instead this book made me sad and made me fearful of how people see her. I obviously do not see her as defective nor do I see her being mistreated in this way but this book made me very sad.
Do I find truth in how hateful people in this world, yes I do, but this just broke my heart.
I hope and pray that no one looks at my niece or any other beautiful soul with the hatred that the characters of this book portrayed for Britton. I pray that the families of all children love and protect their children with the faith of Brittons parents.
Nothing against the author or the book, just a hard book for me to read. I’m grateful for the happy ending but the rest was just so hard to take in.
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
August 8, 2023
Faith in the Lord Jesus is so strong and well worded, but then also were the struggles, doubts, and war of the evil ones constantly afflict and attack believers with.
A difficult eye opener to the world of autism, and disabilities, and how people treat them, often as tho they are worthless ( instead of God's beloved).
So many times, I had to stop, cry, and ask Jesus for forgiveness.
A few scenes were really hard for me to read. I don't doubt they were true, and have been throughout history, but it is hard to read about not only lack of compassion, but people enjoying hurting others.
I had to look up some of the differences between autism and Downs syndrome (not having really really been around either much in my almost 80 years).
One site gave this as part of the answer:
DS is also likely to cause individuals to learn and progress more slowly.
ASD includes a wide range of intellectual abilities —
from severe delays to gifted, or superior levels of intelligence.
I am thinking the main character in the novel is in fact, gifted and with a superior level of intelligence...
but since he cannot speak,
and has what many would find ( at least at first)
odd, or difficult, or unusual behavior or mannerisms ( like flapping hands, etc.)
and so his high intellectual level would be hard to know.
another difference is an autistic person cannot be spotted by their looks
( while a person with downs does have recognizable features).
However, one actual 'good' aspect of our technology today,
is many autistic people can use cell phones, computers etc. to 'speak' for them by typing out what they are thinking and feeling.
But also, God is so strong in this novel.
And so, I will read the next in the series.
I just had a hard time with so much pain and evil.
And ha...this novel even made me wonder if I wasn't a low level autistic person. I am ( or used to be) very chatty( at almost 80 am losing my voice but won't go to a specialist), so it would seem crazy to think so.
But I am also very shy, and often prefer to be alone much of the time. And I have always struggled with depression and or anxiety.
And so
I really liked this author's great focus on faith. I would have liked even more scriptures tho.
In one way, I wish her writing was not so 'raw',
but on the other hand, her grasp of the Christian faith is superb.
A difficult eye opener to the world of autism, and disabilities, and how people treat them, often as tho they are worthless ( instead of God's beloved).
So many times, I had to stop, cry, and ask Jesus for forgiveness.
A few scenes were really hard for me to read. I don't doubt they were true, and have been throughout history, but it is hard to read about not only lack of compassion, but people enjoying hurting others.
I had to look up some of the differences between autism and Downs syndrome (not having really really been around either much in my almost 80 years).
One site gave this as part of the answer:
DS is also likely to cause individuals to learn and progress more slowly.
ASD includes a wide range of intellectual abilities —
from severe delays to gifted, or superior levels of intelligence.
I am thinking the main character in the novel is in fact, gifted and with a superior level of intelligence...
but since he cannot speak,
and has what many would find ( at least at first)
odd, or difficult, or unusual behavior or mannerisms ( like flapping hands, etc.)
and so his high intellectual level would be hard to know.
another difference is an autistic person cannot be spotted by their looks
( while a person with downs does have recognizable features).
However, one actual 'good' aspect of our technology today,
is many autistic people can use cell phones, computers etc. to 'speak' for them by typing out what they are thinking and feeling.
But also, God is so strong in this novel.
And so, I will read the next in the series.
I just had a hard time with so much pain and evil.
And ha...this novel even made me wonder if I wasn't a low level autistic person. I am ( or used to be) very chatty( at almost 80 am losing my voice but won't go to a specialist), so it would seem crazy to think so.
But I am also very shy, and often prefer to be alone much of the time. And I have always struggled with depression and or anxiety.
And so
I really liked this author's great focus on faith. I would have liked even more scriptures tho.
In one way, I wish her writing was not so 'raw',
but on the other hand, her grasp of the Christian faith is superb.
March 8, 2023
stumbled across this
Amazing. There are other words but the first few pages spoke Truth in such a way..there are few words to describe how encouraged I feel after it came to a close. It was real and raw..and having 2 of my girls have seizures it touched in a very personal way. Thank you for this!
Amazing. There are other words but the first few pages spoke Truth in such a way..there are few words to describe how encouraged I feel after it came to a close. It was real and raw..and having 2 of my girls have seizures it touched in a very personal way. Thank you for this!
October 25, 2021
This book is absolutely amazing for the work of a new author. You can feel her faith oozing through the pages of this book and seeping out of the ink. It’s beautiful and it’s mesmerizing in its unabashed telling of the truth of our society
May 6, 2025
It has been a couple months since I read this one, so I will keep my review short.
Mostly, this book needed a heavy dose of editing. The writing was convoluted and, at some points, grammatically questionable. Worse the sentence-level writing was the repetitive and drawn-out scenes that revealed the exact same struggle each time. Every time I thought the main character was making progress, he was back to hating himself both mentally and physically within the next paragraph. Perhaps this was the point, but it still could have been conveyed in half the amount of book. Out of all of this, however, there were some gems ("Speaking of weapons--prayers count," "Resentment is a slippery form of evil. I mustn't take that path; there are no handrails," etc.), especially when it came to spiritual insights.
I appreciated the spiritual truths in this book, but there was a lot of questionable representation of how spiritual warfare works—though I do understand this is a fantasy, so maybe that can be given a pass. Perhaps more concerning was some of the representation of autism. I am absolutely no expert, so it is hard for me to say with certainty, but I do know facilitated typing, one of the major plot devices, is largely regarded as a pseudoscientific technique. It makes me question what other practices the author is advocating.
Through all my concerns, I will say this book kept me reading late into the night, so I give it credit for that. I do not suggest reading this book, and I don't plan on reading the next in the series, but I think if the author edits her books more thoroughly in the future, she has the tools to produce captivating work.
Mostly, this book needed a heavy dose of editing. The writing was convoluted and, at some points, grammatically questionable. Worse the sentence-level writing was the repetitive and drawn-out scenes that revealed the exact same struggle each time. Every time I thought the main character was making progress, he was back to hating himself both mentally and physically within the next paragraph. Perhaps this was the point, but it still could have been conveyed in half the amount of book. Out of all of this, however, there were some gems ("Speaking of weapons--prayers count," "Resentment is a slippery form of evil. I mustn't take that path; there are no handrails," etc.), especially when it came to spiritual insights.
I appreciated the spiritual truths in this book, but there was a lot of questionable representation of how spiritual warfare works—though I do understand this is a fantasy, so maybe that can be given a pass. Perhaps more concerning was some of the representation of autism. I am absolutely no expert, so it is hard for me to say with certainty, but I do know facilitated typing, one of the major plot devices, is largely regarded as a pseudoscientific technique. It makes me question what other practices the author is advocating.
Through all my concerns, I will say this book kept me reading late into the night, so I give it credit for that. I do not suggest reading this book, and I don't plan on reading the next in the series, but I think if the author edits her books more thoroughly in the future, she has the tools to produce captivating work.
January 29, 2025
3.5 ✨ this book was nothing I expected it to be yet I really enjoyed it! I was unsure if I would get into it in the beginning but wow, there is so much to the story that I kept being pulled back to see what happened and it does pick up too! The main character having autism was unlike anything I’ve read before and was quite eye opening. I really admire the ability to portray this experience. I really appreciate the different take on spiritual battles, that was my favorite part of the book (and least favorite…). The depth of detail from the power and glory of El and His Angel warriors to the evil trolls and their horrid depiction was so creative! It really made me have a more physical outlook on the everyday spiritual evils we face. Although the evil was so evil, I didn’t like it one bit (so job well done!), the scary thing is that that is a glimpse of the reality of the evil in this world. But thankfully, we have a much more powerful God on our side, the glimpses of life of eternity and peace with him, as well as the Light Warriors protecting and providing peace was so wonderful and awe inspiring! The Light will shine!!! Thank you for the much needed reminders of guarding our hearts and always leaning on Jesus and trusting in him. My favorite quote from the book is “Fear is faith in the wrong God.” Definitely give this one a read!
November 15, 2024
The Defective
Amazing intertwining of faith and
the actual life of autistic children woven into a gripping story. Full of suspense as the physical and spiritual realms become alive in clash of good and evil as Britton, the defective in eyes of the world yet truly a child of the King is almost obliterated by the evil forces who see him as defective a burden on society.
Amazing intertwining of faith and
the actual life of autistic children woven into a gripping story. Full of suspense as the physical and spiritual realms become alive in clash of good and evil as Britton, the defective in eyes of the world yet truly a child of the King is almost obliterated by the evil forces who see him as defective a burden on society.
May 17, 2024
We are proud to announce that THE CHOOSING: A Captivating Christian Fantasy by Teresa Holman has been honored with the B.R.A.G. Medallion (Book Readers Appreciation Group). It now joins the very select award-winning, reader-recommended books at indieBRAG.
December 12, 2025
Choose to Read this Blessed story
I loved the The author explained heaven and hell. And The spiritual warfare we struggle with every single day. I would have given it 5 stars but it was a little hard to follow somtimes but totally Worth finishing.
I loved the The author explained heaven and hell. And The spiritual warfare we struggle with every single day. I would have given it 5 stars but it was a little hard to follow somtimes but totally Worth finishing.
April 30, 2023
A good example for people who have disabilities that can be heard it was a great story and a fun and interesting read
March 10, 2025
spellbinding
Amazing read! A really hard dig into the world of “autism” that many families struggle with. Thank you for the snippet of insight!
Amazing read! A really hard dig into the world of “autism” that many families struggle with. Thank you for the snippet of insight!
December 12, 2025
I couldn’t anymore. I gave up. This is wild. If I drank each time someone said light I would’ve been dead by end of chapter one.
Displaying 1 - 16 of 16 reviews