You Mean I Have to Look at the Body?!: Stories of Dying and Living

by Marcia M. Cham

By sharing initmate, personal stories, Reverend Marcia M. Cham confronts her own fear of death through her pastoral experiences. Through the stories, Cham discusses some nagging questions around Are we ever ready to die? Did Dad know he was going to die? Are our days numbered? Does God willy-nilly strike us dead? She and a grieving wife create bumper stickers and t-shirt slogans for the grieving out of the frustrating remarks from those unfamiliar with the grief process. As Cham journeys "through the valley of the shadow," she shares about accidental deaths, good deaths, celebrations of life, family deaths, and the invasion of and power of fear. She learns to treasure the gift of laughter as she moves deeper into the mysteries and surprises of life and death. Her journey is colored by humor, respectful irreverence, and honesty.

260 pages, Paperback

First published August 14, 2008

Reviews

[Christy]

Marcia Cham is a retired pastor who presently works as an on-call chaplain at a medical center near her home in North Carolina. As pastor, Ms. Cham has officiated at funerals while providing comfort to family and friends of the deceased. She has dealt with a plethora of deaths, from babies to friends to her own family, all the while trying to deal with her own questions about and fear of death.

This book is Cham’s journey as she seeks to face her fears so she can put them aside while serving others. Cham’s witty style and heartwarming stories are not only entertaining but endearing. She shows an amazing propensity to draw the reader into her story so that the reader feels her pain, shares her grief, and rejoices with her love for life and God. She offers her reader insightful advice regarding how to help someone who is grieving the death of a loved one and shares letters she has written to her family about her own death. An incredible book that should be shared with family and friends, one that will encourage discussion about a subject that is often put aside and rarely talked about: death.

[Cindy]

I knew this Author very well growing up, her son was my friend and she is still good friends with my Mom. For anyone that questions or has questions about the meaning of the fear of death, this is a GREAT book. The author had panic attacks - and she is a deeply faithful minister(retired) - the book teaches you how to handle grief and fear of death from someone who is very close to it as a minister and someone who has dealt with great loss. On top of it, she has a wonderful (albeit dry) sense of humor!!

[Chris]

Written by my former youth director, this is a fabulous collection of tender/humorous/insightful stories about death and dying. Also a very encouraging story about one woman's long journey with anxiety and the Godly counselors and encouragers who, gracefully, helped along the way. I've selected several chapters to share with our chaplains. Also passed it to three friends I believe will benefit from reading it.