What do you think?
Rate this book
Rattler
Jerry enjoys spending time with Cindy, the prettiest girl in junior high, but he doesn't like the jokes she plays using her pet rattlesnake.
71 pages, Library Binding
First published June 1, 1993
About the author
Mel Cebulash
80 books12 followersMel Cebulash grew up in Union City, NJ where he developed his athletic skills in schoolyard games. Rather than pursue a career in sports, he chose to write about them. Many of his published works, both fiction and non-fiction, reflect his life-long fascination with sports and his special interest in writing for young people.
Ratings & Reviews
Friends & Following
Create a free account to discover what your friends think of this book!
Community Reviews
Displaying 1 - 2 of 2 reviews
March 24, 2017
I'd like to paint a picture for you. In order to understand Cindy, please imagine that the following three types of people were genetically spliced together into one:
1) The pretty, popular girl all the boys want to crawl up into despite glaring personality flaws.
PLUS
2) That sophomoric, rancidly unfunny douche in your high school class who thought messy, dangerous pranks were cool and that Tom Green and Johnny Knoxville were the living end of comedy. This guy also followed Adam Sandler's career far longer than he should have and possibly still does.
WITH A SPRINKLING OF
3) the girl gremlin from Gremlins 2 except not sassy and awesome. Basically she represents how I imagine Cindy does her makeup.
Anyway now you know Cindy. For some reason only an indiscriminate teenage libido can explain, Jerry falls for her. His newly-developed, untrained penis is a dowsing rod for bad ideas, so he decides to win her over by going pranking with her. The only prank she plays is putting her defanged pet rattlesnake on the ground near innocent people at the mall, "saving" their lives, and taking the money they offer.
After like a day of this, Jerry comes to his senses and decides her snizz isn't worth the shame of praying on old lady mall walkers with a fixed income. She throws a hissy fit and does it anyway. Then something happens with an actual rattlesnake or something, I don't remember.
I think Cindy dies at the end and Jerry finally comes out as all men named Jerry eventually do. Two stars.
1) The pretty, popular girl all the boys want to crawl up into despite glaring personality flaws.
PLUS
2) That sophomoric, rancidly unfunny douche in your high school class who thought messy, dangerous pranks were cool and that Tom Green and Johnny Knoxville were the living end of comedy. This guy also followed Adam Sandler's career far longer than he should have and possibly still does.
WITH A SPRINKLING OF
3) the girl gremlin from Gremlins 2 except not sassy and awesome. Basically she represents how I imagine Cindy does her makeup.
Anyway now you know Cindy. For some reason only an indiscriminate teenage libido can explain, Jerry falls for her. His newly-developed, untrained penis is a dowsing rod for bad ideas, so he decides to win her over by going pranking with her. The only prank she plays is putting her defanged pet rattlesnake on the ground near innocent people at the mall, "saving" their lives, and taking the money they offer.
After like a day of this, Jerry comes to his senses and decides her snizz isn't worth the shame of praying on old lady mall walkers with a fixed income. She throws a hissy fit and does it anyway. Then something happens with an actual rattlesnake or something, I don't remember.
I think Cindy dies at the end and Jerry finally comes out as all men named Jerry eventually do. Two stars.
January 11, 2017
Cindy is a psycho and a fraud, but at least she's not afraid of the snake. So, this was the best book I've read so far this year. As you can see, all the other books I've read have been total bullshit.
Bye.
Bye.
Displaying 1 - 2 of 2 reviews