Cultural Etiquette: a Guide for the Well-Intentioned

by Amoja Three Rivers

"This guide is to help people avoid some of the obvious as well as not so obvious pitfalls of unwitting racism and anti-Semitism."

Amoja Three Rivers' "Cultural Etiquette: A Guide for the Well-Intentioned" was originally published in 1990. It was intended as an antidote to the poison of microaggressions committed by people of all racial and ethnic groups in writing and thinking about as well as speaking and interacting with Black/Indigenous/People of Color and Jewish people.

Long before Franchesca Ramsey's "Sh#t White Girls Say to Black Girls" YouTube video and all the videos and blogs that grew from it, "Cultural Etiquette" was a thoughtful, witty account of the things no one should say to members of racial and ethnic groups subjected to systemic oppression in the United States. Sample chapter headings include "What Is Ethnocentrism and What Should I Take For It?" and "Just Don’t Do This. Okay?"

This edition is authorized by the next-of-kin of the late Amoja Three Rivers and is published by the author's designated custodian of her writings. It preserves all of Three Rivers' words with only tiny changes in punctuation, spelling corrections and formatting necessary for an ebook.

Genres: Feminism, Indigenous, African American

38 pages, Paperback

First published January 1, 1990

Reviews

[Pat Dutt · Rating 4 out of 5]

Very ahead of its time.

[Misha · Rating 5 out of 5]

My wife used this book to teach some of her classes before she met Amoja. When we got together, she asked me to read it (note, she is African-American, I am European-American). This book is wonderful and should be read by every person who isn't of African descent. I was able to meet Amoja through my wife and spent a few Thanksgivings with her.

We also had the great honor of tending to her as she hovered between this plane of existence and the next. Amoja Three Rivers passed away on December 13, 2015. There are more of her writings that friends will be transcribing and getting ready for print. Hopefully, you will see more from her over the next few years.

[Arwen Lynch · Rating 5 out of 5]

I bought this book from Amoja ThreeRivers in ???? I know it was at a Michigan Womyn’s Music Festival, but I can’t remember the year. I attended from 1990 to 2000.

This book is a great place to start your racism opening. I didn’t have a name for my internalized racism that included “I can’t be racist because I have black friends.” Sigh.

I’m still very aware of when I have reactions solely based on someone’s ethnicity. This book was my proving ground. And it is still in my library.

[Michel · Rating 3 out of 5]

Both thin and deep.
Not enough meat on the bones, but a strong skeletton which awoke my awareness that naked good intentions and 'inclusive' thinking need be dressed with the appropriate vocabulary.
Language reflects the dominant culture (in this country, male wasp) and using it casually is not only hurtful, but can make us miss the issues.