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Laughs & Spooks, Volume 1
James and his band of less-than-lucky friends and family are at it again! Get ready for the laughs in the first volume of a special series from the Beers News & Story Brews newsletter. Laughs & Spooks, Volume 1 begins with Robby's unique attempt at cooling off using toothpaste and continues with a slew of harebrained, unfortunate, and even spooky adventures ranging from an honest-to-goodness ghost story about a grandma specter to the author's electrifying efforts to heat a turtle pool. Experience the trepidation as you listen to Verl recount the horrifying yet humorous visit to Hogle Zoo's hippo paddock. Feel James's inner struggles as you read about his hilarious journey into the fine art of wooing through social dance. Finally, try not to laugh as James retells the story of the rocket with a mind of its own as well as the tale of his nightmare deep tissue massage at the meaty hands of Helga the cowhand masseuse. James D. Beers is a native Idahoan raised on a healthy dose of time in the woods. He loves ice cream, steak, and driving questionable two-track roads in the wilderness. Presently he lives in Utah with his wife, Jenna, and son, Joseph.
105 pages, Kindle Edition
Published September 27, 2018
1 person is currently reading
About the author
James D. Beers
7 books15 followers As a child James wanted to be a cowboy, a fireman, an astronaut, an author, an inventor, a computer guy, a marine biologist, a professional basketball player, or an archaeologist when he grew up. When he finally reached adulthood (does growing up ever really stop?) he settled into archaeology. But that doesn’t mean he didn’t give the others a try (some a little better try than others).
Between five- and seven-years-old, he used to don chaps and a plastic cowboy hat while riding his stick horse outside Boss the Cow’s pasture, daring himself to cross the fence and do some real cow roping. When he was eight he wrote his first story—a poorly-punctuated, five-pager about an Indian named Run Away Bear. Around nine-years-old he and his cousins set their grandma’s old pioneer wagon on fire and tried to save it with a garden hose.
During the 1980s he got really into his friend’s Commodore 64 computer and played a lot of Oregon Trail and Where in the World Is Carmen San Diego? Also during the 1980s, he watched the movie Space Camp and launched and lost a couple dozen Estes rockets all while trying to figure out what a newton was in the world of rocket science.
By the time he was 10, James’s parents had purchased a membership at the local pool facility and he suddenly took an interest in radio controlled submarines and poisonous octopi. In his early teens, with a mile of yarn and a few thousand tacks, James figured out how to open and close his bedroom door, turn the lights on and off, shoot intruders with darts, and wake up his little brother just by pulling a few strings at the head of his bed.
In his mid-teens, James came off an undefeated basketball season, scoring nearly 100 points for his eight-grade team. Then he signed on with a church basketball team and lost every game for the next three years. At that point James decided to give archaeology and writing serious thought.
By the time he was a junior in college, his professors had convinced him that creative writing was so hard as to be nearly impossible and that archaeology was only slightly less difficult. So today James sits at a desk and writes and reviews technical papers about ancient peoples' trash (aka, archaeology). He says it's not always as bad as it sounds, but it's no Indiana Jones.
Until recently, James had given up on creative writing, but then he realized how many stories he had to tell, especially funny stories about his many misadventures in the wilds of Northern Idaho. So now he’s trying to put those stories to pen and get them out there for others to enjoy.
Currently, James resides in Central Arkansas with his awesome wife, exceptional son, and maximum allowed distance between home and access to ice cream (1 mile).
Between five- and seven-years-old, he used to don chaps and a plastic cowboy hat while riding his stick horse outside Boss the Cow’s pasture, daring himself to cross the fence and do some real cow roping. When he was eight he wrote his first story—a poorly-punctuated, five-pager about an Indian named Run Away Bear. Around nine-years-old he and his cousins set their grandma’s old pioneer wagon on fire and tried to save it with a garden hose.
During the 1980s he got really into his friend’s Commodore 64 computer and played a lot of Oregon Trail and Where in the World Is Carmen San Diego? Also during the 1980s, he watched the movie Space Camp and launched and lost a couple dozen Estes rockets all while trying to figure out what a newton was in the world of rocket science.
By the time he was 10, James’s parents had purchased a membership at the local pool facility and he suddenly took an interest in radio controlled submarines and poisonous octopi. In his early teens, with a mile of yarn and a few thousand tacks, James figured out how to open and close his bedroom door, turn the lights on and off, shoot intruders with darts, and wake up his little brother just by pulling a few strings at the head of his bed.
In his mid-teens, James came off an undefeated basketball season, scoring nearly 100 points for his eight-grade team. Then he signed on with a church basketball team and lost every game for the next three years. At that point James decided to give archaeology and writing serious thought.
By the time he was a junior in college, his professors had convinced him that creative writing was so hard as to be nearly impossible and that archaeology was only slightly less difficult. So today James sits at a desk and writes and reviews technical papers about ancient peoples' trash (aka, archaeology). He says it's not always as bad as it sounds, but it's no Indiana Jones.
Until recently, James had given up on creative writing, but then he realized how many stories he had to tell, especially funny stories about his many misadventures in the wilds of Northern Idaho. So now he’s trying to put those stories to pen and get them out there for others to enjoy.
Currently, James resides in Central Arkansas with his awesome wife, exceptional son, and maximum allowed distance between home and access to ice cream (1 mile).
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Displaying 1 of 1 review
March 18, 2020
Although I may have a biased opinion (I'm the author), I still think this is a pretty good collection of humorous and spooky tales.
My favorites in this short collection are The Haunting at Gaver's Place (a spooky tale based on a true story), Get Off My Roads!!! (funny short about the crazy driver mom), To Woo or Not to Woo? (funny short about the fear of dancing), and The Paddock (funny short about a zoo visit).
My favorites in this short collection are The Haunting at Gaver's Place (a spooky tale based on a true story), Get Off My Roads!!! (funny short about the crazy driver mom), To Woo or Not to Woo? (funny short about the fear of dancing), and The Paddock (funny short about a zoo visit).
Displaying 1 of 1 review