Dangerous Ideas About Mothers

by Camilla Nelson (Editor), Rachel Robertson (Editor)

This book won’t give advice on birth, breastfeeding, or bonding It's about motherhood as a cultural construct.Often, opinions are funneled into and amplified on social media, where conversations turn ugly and advice is commercialized. This book confronts issues from divorce and over-burdened court systems, parenting children with a disability, to the big business of mummy-dom, to shifting ideas about fathers, to the increasing numbers of women who choose not to have children. It opens up a space where the taboo and unspoken can be voiced, and makes room for those marginalized by regular conversations around mothers and motherhood.

 

Genres: Feminism

250 pages, Paperback

Published October 1, 2018

Reviews

[Jules · Rating 4 out of 5]

Reading this book made me yearn for simpler days of being an undergrad student, completing my gender studies degree and having the time and space to contemplate issues which are, ironically, much more relevant to my life now that I’m a bit older. I particularly enjoyed chapters which were generous with the writer’s lived experience, such as those about mothering children with disabilities, parenting after coming out as transgender, or having a NESB mother. I could have done without the token chapter on fatherhood from a father’s perspective.
I was compelled most of all by Josephine Wilson’s Once Upon a Time in Motherhood, which details the process of adopting her daughter from China, and really challenged a lot of my views and got my brain thinking.
I have a lot of thoughts and feelings about intercountry adoption, having worked with a lot of “failed adoptees” as a youth worker and seeing how traumatic it can be once adolescence rolls around and adoptive parents can no longer cope with the realities of reactive attachment disorder or other mental and physical health issues. There’s a lot of intercountry adoption in my family too - though far more successful, it hasn’t been without its heartache, for all parties. I was shocked that Wilson so clearly acknowledges the challenges and dubious ethics around this practice, yet still went ahead with it anyway, despite having a biological child already!

[Toni · Rating 5 out of 5]

A worthy read about cultural and historical perspectives on the role of women helping to identify the impact of feminism on the current environment. Dangerous Ideas About Mothers offers frank discussion highlighting the concerns of a culture engendering women as natural providers of care, which is 'undervalued, underpaid, or rendered invisible.'

[Alla Anderson · Rating 3 out of 5]

Written too academically, to captivate most of the female audience. Otherwise, many interesting ideas and information.

[Missa · Rating 4 out of 5]

This isn’t a parenting guide—it’s an unfiltered look at the complexities of motherhood as a cultural construct. Covering everything from the weaponization of family courts to the realities of raising children with disabilities, the book dives into the messy, emotional, and often unspoken sides of mothering.

Some chapters hit harder than others. “Domesticating Violence” made me pause, reflecting on how the system both helps and fails. Quinn Eades’ piece on being a trans mother challenged ingrained ideas of what “mother” even means. Emma A. Jane’s essay had me laughing and nodding along—single & thriving is my jam!

It’s an academic read, so some parts were dense, but the lived experiences shared make it worth pushing through. This book is nearing its first decade, and while stats may be outdated, the stories remain relevant—whether you’re a mother or not.

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