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What Does It Mean to Be Welcoming?: Navigating LGBT Questions in Your Church
Is your church wrestling with LGBT questions from membership to marriage? Travis Collins has been there. A pastor who has walked congregations through the complex issues surrounding gay Christians, he knows firsthand the confusion and hurt that often follow. He has also seen churches have these conversations with grace and understanding.
In this practical resource, readers will gain insight into relevant biblical passages and hear from interpreters on both sides of the debate. They will consider the implications of their convictions for ministry practice, relationships, church policy, and more. They will hear testimonies from gay friends and family members about their experiences in the church. Collins calls readers to both grace and truth, with humility.
What Does It Mean to Be Welcoming? considers how we might welcome everyone into the church while calling for all to be transformed.
In this practical resource, readers will gain insight into relevant biblical passages and hear from interpreters on both sides of the debate. They will consider the implications of their convictions for ministry practice, relationships, church policy, and more. They will hear testimonies from gay friends and family members about their experiences in the church. Collins calls readers to both grace and truth, with humility.
What Does It Mean to Be Welcoming? considers how we might welcome everyone into the church while calling for all to be transformed.
- GenresSexuality
144 pages, Paperback
Published August 14, 2018
6 people are currently reading
78 people want to read
About the author
Travis Collins
18 books9 followersBA, Samford University
M.Div., Southern Baptist Theological Seminary
PhD, Southern Baptist Theological Seminary
Missionary to Nigeria 1991-1996
Pastor in US since 1996
Presently Pastor of First Baptist Church, Huntsville, Alabama
Member of the Fresh Expressions US Team
M.Div., Southern Baptist Theological Seminary
PhD, Southern Baptist Theological Seminary
Missionary to Nigeria 1991-1996
Pastor in US since 1996
Presently Pastor of First Baptist Church, Huntsville, Alabama
Member of the Fresh Expressions US Team
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Displaying 1 - 11 of 11 reviews
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July 5, 2019It took 9 chapters for Collins to finally get around to discussing - "What Does It Mean to Be Welcoming?". He spent most of the time describing the differences between those who hold an affirming view of same-sex sexual behavior and those who hold a more traditional conviction. Believing the book would mostly be centered around the title of this book, I did not find this read super helpful.
June 11, 2021
Travis Collins does an excellent job at choosing a side but still resting in the middle. I am sure that many people who take the affirming position will disagree with a lot of his points and a lot of traditionalists will disagree with his points, which means he is my kind of guy.
First, I love how Collins sets up the book. He begins the book by talking about who he has in mind regarding the discussion: committed, monogamist, homosexual couples. He excludes transgender in his discussion, and rightly so as that is a whole other argument when regarding church politics, but it does mean that the whole "answering LGBT questions" should be left off the title, as he is only talking about part of the "spectrum" of sexuality as it relates to the church. Next, he takes time to unpack wrong assumptions. A few of my favorite misconceptions traditionalist bring up are "It is wrong to assume that children of gay couples are maladjusted," and "All gay people hate those who have a traditional view of marriage." These two misconceptions hurt people's chances of maintaining a welcoming and loving stance in churches. The best point in the opening chapter(s) is that the "source" of homosexuality and attraction is irrelevant. The point is not to answer WHY people are people the way they are, the question is as a church how should we RESPOND? He even goes as far to say, that by the time adults are of age, attraction is not something that can be controlled by the individual. Regardless of nature or nurture, an adult cannot "control" their attraction desires and to be tempted as a homosexual is to on the same plane as a single heterosexual being tempted. The only difference being that the heterosexual has the hope and prospect of being married. This point is important not only to church leaders trying to make an opinion and take a stance on the matter, but also parents who may feel guilty because their child came out as gay. At the end of the opening chapters, he includes an eye-opening testimony of a gay Christian whose parents were great, Christian parents, who fostered discipline and independence, and he "turned out gay."
Next, Collins looks at why many Christian leaders and denominations affirm homosexuality and even include leaders in their church who are so. Among these reasons are interpretation of the scriptures that talk about homosexuality, calls for the Bible to be "updated" to include a modern definition of homosexuality, the church's declining attendance because of unwillingness to change, and the many social changes that occurred in the New Testament including the inclusion of Gentiles. To include my own thoughts, if he spoke to Paul about Gentiles and to Peter about food, then why is it crazy to believe that God could be speaking to us today about homosexuality?
However, Collins then looks at the Traditional view and his opinion. While he admits this in his writings, it is difficult to give him credit to dispute the points he brings up for the opinions of others that he chooses to bring up. To get a full understanding of this issue, one will need to look at multiple opinions. Still, Collins does an excellent job using the Bible and historical context to support his Traditional view. His first and best perspective is that homosexuality in the ancient world was not unheard of. Therefore, Paul, who was a very pointed writer, would not have shied away from using indirect language when it came to sexuality. Affirmers claim that homosexuality refers to the act of men taking sexual advantage of teenage boys, but if this were the case, then why does Paul also address women having sexual relations with other women in other contexts? Paul also focuses on being the glory of God despite the declining numbers in the church. A great quote from this section: “It is okay to be on the wrong side of history if history is one the wrong side of morality.” I agree with most his conclusions, but I do believe that his argument is weakened by justifying his Traditionalist position by poking holes in the Affirming position. Instead, Collins should have talked about what he believed and why first, and then addressed his other side.
Next, Collins examines what Christian homosexuals should do: remain abstinent. Collins argues that because figures in the Bible remained abstinent, including Paul and Jesus, finding their identity in the Christ or God himself, these people should too. This is the one part of the book that did not sit well with me. As much as I agree with a Traditional stance, I do not feel that Collins, a married man who is able to enjoy the pleasures of sex without guilt, has the right to comment on what happens in the bedroom of homosexuals, and Collins himself admits this at the end of the chapter. This chapter was one for those who are same-sex attracted and looking to take a leadership role in the church, not for the “lay-person” homosexual.
Finally, Collins examines what the church should do in response to this issue. He speaks to the importance of churches taking a stand in one direction or another. I thought this was a great point. Churches must speak to this issue and congregations deserve to know where their church stands on issues like this. Collins also takes time to unpack things like divorce and alcoholism, areas that church should come down a bit harder. Even though these things are not lifestyles that people WANT to live with (as a general rule), as a church we still welcome these people despite their flaws; why would we not welcome homosexuals too? Then he discusses his position of his own church: “welcoming but not affirming and mutually transforming.” This section could have had an entire book written about it. Collins’ church made a position statement that addressed what the church BELIEVED about marriage. Its statement does not address what they do not believe about marriage. This allows membership to be extended to anyone wishing to go on a spiritual journey after Jesus and does not limit homosexuals from being members of the congregation. I thought this was an amazing approach. The church was bold and took a traditional stance on sexuality but did not condemn or bar those who are homosexuals from attending the church. This chapter also discusses how churches should address this topic and then move on. He does not suggest that churches should address it and then never talk about it again. Instead, churches should follow the Bible’s infrequency when discussing homosexuality. The Bible’s themes focus more on giving to the poor, giving up material possessions, and loving God and neighbors. The Bible spends little time discussing what homosexuals do behind closed doors. Collins also has a progressive traditional view of those going into church leadership. He believes that those same sex attracted people who have made a vow to remain abstinent can be allowed to hold leadership positions in the church. This helped his argument remain consistent with earlier points made in the book.
In the end, I picked up this book when a homosexual colleague of mine adopted a foster student who I was teaching my classroom at the time. In the past, I would have immediately scoffed at the idea, but after watching the student grow from below basic to grade level in a matter of a year, I could not help but celebrate the adoption of this girl. I began questioning my traditional view of sexuality and marriage. This book helped me to realize that I should celebrate the adoption of that student, I should still take a stance on the issue, and I should be able to welcome them to our church without judgement heaped upon them or me.
After reading this book, I have remained a traditionalist when viewing marriage and sexuality, but I would argue that it is as close to being an affirmer as one can be without believing that homosexuality should be celebrated. I agree with Collins’ church statement regarding membership and leadership into the church, but I also believe that talking about what homosexuals should do when they come out is gay is a sticky situation. Our job as church members is to take a stance and welcome anyone who wants to find Jesus, not encourage what homosexuals should do in the privacy of their bedroom. Limiting someone from the celebration of intimacy does not seem like the right way of going about things, but that does not mean that a church cannot take a stance against it.
First, I love how Collins sets up the book. He begins the book by talking about who he has in mind regarding the discussion: committed, monogamist, homosexual couples. He excludes transgender in his discussion, and rightly so as that is a whole other argument when regarding church politics, but it does mean that the whole "answering LGBT questions" should be left off the title, as he is only talking about part of the "spectrum" of sexuality as it relates to the church. Next, he takes time to unpack wrong assumptions. A few of my favorite misconceptions traditionalist bring up are "It is wrong to assume that children of gay couples are maladjusted," and "All gay people hate those who have a traditional view of marriage." These two misconceptions hurt people's chances of maintaining a welcoming and loving stance in churches. The best point in the opening chapter(s) is that the "source" of homosexuality and attraction is irrelevant. The point is not to answer WHY people are people the way they are, the question is as a church how should we RESPOND? He even goes as far to say, that by the time adults are of age, attraction is not something that can be controlled by the individual. Regardless of nature or nurture, an adult cannot "control" their attraction desires and to be tempted as a homosexual is to on the same plane as a single heterosexual being tempted. The only difference being that the heterosexual has the hope and prospect of being married. This point is important not only to church leaders trying to make an opinion and take a stance on the matter, but also parents who may feel guilty because their child came out as gay. At the end of the opening chapters, he includes an eye-opening testimony of a gay Christian whose parents were great, Christian parents, who fostered discipline and independence, and he "turned out gay."
Next, Collins looks at why many Christian leaders and denominations affirm homosexuality and even include leaders in their church who are so. Among these reasons are interpretation of the scriptures that talk about homosexuality, calls for the Bible to be "updated" to include a modern definition of homosexuality, the church's declining attendance because of unwillingness to change, and the many social changes that occurred in the New Testament including the inclusion of Gentiles. To include my own thoughts, if he spoke to Paul about Gentiles and to Peter about food, then why is it crazy to believe that God could be speaking to us today about homosexuality?
However, Collins then looks at the Traditional view and his opinion. While he admits this in his writings, it is difficult to give him credit to dispute the points he brings up for the opinions of others that he chooses to bring up. To get a full understanding of this issue, one will need to look at multiple opinions. Still, Collins does an excellent job using the Bible and historical context to support his Traditional view. His first and best perspective is that homosexuality in the ancient world was not unheard of. Therefore, Paul, who was a very pointed writer, would not have shied away from using indirect language when it came to sexuality. Affirmers claim that homosexuality refers to the act of men taking sexual advantage of teenage boys, but if this were the case, then why does Paul also address women having sexual relations with other women in other contexts? Paul also focuses on being the glory of God despite the declining numbers in the church. A great quote from this section: “It is okay to be on the wrong side of history if history is one the wrong side of morality.” I agree with most his conclusions, but I do believe that his argument is weakened by justifying his Traditionalist position by poking holes in the Affirming position. Instead, Collins should have talked about what he believed and why first, and then addressed his other side.
Next, Collins examines what Christian homosexuals should do: remain abstinent. Collins argues that because figures in the Bible remained abstinent, including Paul and Jesus, finding their identity in the Christ or God himself, these people should too. This is the one part of the book that did not sit well with me. As much as I agree with a Traditional stance, I do not feel that Collins, a married man who is able to enjoy the pleasures of sex without guilt, has the right to comment on what happens in the bedroom of homosexuals, and Collins himself admits this at the end of the chapter. This chapter was one for those who are same-sex attracted and looking to take a leadership role in the church, not for the “lay-person” homosexual.
Finally, Collins examines what the church should do in response to this issue. He speaks to the importance of churches taking a stand in one direction or another. I thought this was a great point. Churches must speak to this issue and congregations deserve to know where their church stands on issues like this. Collins also takes time to unpack things like divorce and alcoholism, areas that church should come down a bit harder. Even though these things are not lifestyles that people WANT to live with (as a general rule), as a church we still welcome these people despite their flaws; why would we not welcome homosexuals too? Then he discusses his position of his own church: “welcoming but not affirming and mutually transforming.” This section could have had an entire book written about it. Collins’ church made a position statement that addressed what the church BELIEVED about marriage. Its statement does not address what they do not believe about marriage. This allows membership to be extended to anyone wishing to go on a spiritual journey after Jesus and does not limit homosexuals from being members of the congregation. I thought this was an amazing approach. The church was bold and took a traditional stance on sexuality but did not condemn or bar those who are homosexuals from attending the church. This chapter also discusses how churches should address this topic and then move on. He does not suggest that churches should address it and then never talk about it again. Instead, churches should follow the Bible’s infrequency when discussing homosexuality. The Bible’s themes focus more on giving to the poor, giving up material possessions, and loving God and neighbors. The Bible spends little time discussing what homosexuals do behind closed doors. Collins also has a progressive traditional view of those going into church leadership. He believes that those same sex attracted people who have made a vow to remain abstinent can be allowed to hold leadership positions in the church. This helped his argument remain consistent with earlier points made in the book.
In the end, I picked up this book when a homosexual colleague of mine adopted a foster student who I was teaching my classroom at the time. In the past, I would have immediately scoffed at the idea, but after watching the student grow from below basic to grade level in a matter of a year, I could not help but celebrate the adoption of this girl. I began questioning my traditional view of sexuality and marriage. This book helped me to realize that I should celebrate the adoption of that student, I should still take a stance on the issue, and I should be able to welcome them to our church without judgement heaped upon them or me.
After reading this book, I have remained a traditionalist when viewing marriage and sexuality, but I would argue that it is as close to being an affirmer as one can be without believing that homosexuality should be celebrated. I agree with Collins’ church statement regarding membership and leadership into the church, but I also believe that talking about what homosexuals should do when they come out is gay is a sticky situation. Our job as church members is to take a stance and welcome anyone who wants to find Jesus, not encourage what homosexuals should do in the privacy of their bedroom. Limiting someone from the celebration of intimacy does not seem like the right way of going about things, but that does not mean that a church cannot take a stance against it.
December 7, 2018
If you are typical, the first thing that catches your eye is LGBT in the title and you want to have your view point heard. This book is mostly written for church leaders and pastors, any one who wants to be able to discuss many issues in your denomination and local church on LGBT questions. Does your church have a policy, clearly stated and acknowledged by your congregation? Don’t just say, we don’t have that problem, because you will be asked if you will marry a couple, accept a new leader, or state your views. This book may just be the tool you need. Travis Collins is a senior pastor in a Baptist church in Huntsville Alabama but don’t let you label machine say I can’t agree with him without listening to his insights. Although he works from a traditional perspective, he offers insights from interpreters on both sides of the debate, presented a well-founded reading list, step by step discussion program for leaders to use to enter the conversations with grace and understanding. He is never judgement and presents a new look at Bible and world history, I had never considered. This is a conversation, pastoral in tone, careful in scholarship, that will help you clarify your ideas and those of your church.
Travis Collins is straight forward and does not rant or pound his fists for what is right and what is wrong. He spends many pages on the Affirming Position and the Traditional position, and how to be a welcoming church, that clearly knows where it stands. Part One is the Complexity of the issue, Part Two is the topic and what the Bible says, and Part three is the Way forward. Competing views and a list of books on same-sex attracted people who choose chastity, and faith and the same-sex community are listed for your study.
The reviews on Amazon aren’t many, but they all are very thankful for this clarifying aid to leaders and congregations as they encounter more situations and dilemmas in their local church. Very helpful and not at all judgement or just one denomination. A straight forward look without emotional baggage.
Travis Collins is straight forward and does not rant or pound his fists for what is right and what is wrong. He spends many pages on the Affirming Position and the Traditional position, and how to be a welcoming church, that clearly knows where it stands. Part One is the Complexity of the issue, Part Two is the topic and what the Bible says, and Part three is the Way forward. Competing views and a list of books on same-sex attracted people who choose chastity, and faith and the same-sex community are listed for your study.
The reviews on Amazon aren’t many, but they all are very thankful for this clarifying aid to leaders and congregations as they encounter more situations and dilemmas in their local church. Very helpful and not at all judgement or just one denomination. A straight forward look without emotional baggage.
December 29, 2018
This book rehashes many of the points made in similar works such as Preston Sprinkle’s “People to Be Loved” and with a very similar tone of compassionate conviction. The book’s strongest contributions emerge from the author’s experience as a pastor who has shepherded multiple congregations through conversations around LGBT+ engagement. I appreciated his distinctions between the different types of Christian judgment in Chapter 2. In Chapter 3, “The Terrifying Beauty of a Diverse Church or Denomination,” he gleans insights about how the church can deal with contentious issues from the Scriptural examples of the Jerusalem Council (Acts) and the conflict between Euodia and Syntyche (Philippians). And his appendices outlining his church’s processes and statement on sexuality (particularly as it pertains to membership and leadership) are useful real-life examples. I would have liked to hear more from him on these types of nitty-gritty pastoral topics. The book is also more helpful for an independent, nondenominational church than a church that is a part of a larger body which specifies certain boundaries for the whole. Nevertheless, I appreciate this new gracious and nuanced voice in the conversation.
January 10, 2019
Collins offers a reasonable approach to navigating congregational study, discernment, and decision-making regarding its position on the nature of human sexuality and practice. The book is clearly written, offers personal narratives, and resources for leaders charged with shepherding these sorts of conversations in their own churches.
Progressives will argue that failing to be both "welcoming" and "affirming" is as good as being neither. Some conservatives will worry about the line between "welcoming" and "affirming." In the end, it's Collins' middle of the road approach that makes the book so good. After all, there's few better examples of hospitality and welcome joined with the expectation of holiness than Jesus himself.
Progressives will argue that failing to be both "welcoming" and "affirming" is as good as being neither. Some conservatives will worry about the line between "welcoming" and "affirming." In the end, it's Collins' middle of the road approach that makes the book so good. After all, there's few better examples of hospitality and welcome joined with the expectation of holiness than Jesus himself.
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October 26, 2018It took Collins nearly 87 pages to quit apologizing for his views before he finally set them out. Excellent work explaining different views on same-sex marriage and church responses once he quit agonizing. He takes a Traditionalist position, very similar to the position of The Wesleyan Church: Marriage is ordained by God as the only setting for sexual intimacy and that it should be between a woman and a man. Everyone else who is not married should abstain, no matter their sexual orientation. That will not be popular in many circles.
Read the book. It is helpful on guiding a congregation through a thoughtful discussion on setting a position in today's cultural arena.
Read the book. It is helpful on guiding a congregation through a thoughtful discussion on setting a position in today's cultural arena.
November 22, 2018
Pretty good overview, and some helpful perspective on his own journey with his church and denomination through these issues. I still prefer "People to be Loved" by Preston Sprinkle, which is a somewhat similar book, but Collins brings his own unique perspective and journey and that's very helpful to hear.
April 12, 2023
Travis Collins book is very timely and is full of valuable information for those of us unsure of what the issues are and how to still be welcoming no matter which side of the issue your church falls. My great regret is that I did not know of this book earlier. It is truly helpful in understanding the opinions of others. And, we all need that!
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August 16, 2020Not the best I've read on this topic... probably good for straight church-going folks who have never engaged before?
October 19, 2020
“Welcoming but not affirming, and mutually transforming.” This book was compassionate and loving yet firmly grounded in solid biblical truth. Absolutely worth a read!
August 20, 2019
I loved the analysis of the arguments in favor of a biblical support for same-sex relationships. Well presented. However, the conclusion at the end as to how to be welcoming was a non sequitur-a surprising conclusion from the material that came before.
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