What do you think?
Rate this book
The Moon in the Water: Reflections on an Aging Parent
Named a Best Book of 2008 by Library Journal
In a series of moving vignettes, the author begins by describing a particular representation of Water-Moon Kuan Yin, a Buddhist teacher and goddess associated with compassion, who often sits on a precarious overhang or floats on a flimsy petal. Then Kuan Yin steps out of the frame to join the author in the mundane challenges of caring for her father-transferring his health insurance, struggling with a wheelchair van, managing adult diapers, or playing in the fictions of dementia. From perplexed to poignant to funny, the vignettes record the working-class English of a fading but still wise dad, and they find other human versions of Kuan Yin in a doctor who will still make house calls or kind strangers in the street.The book includes ten both classical representations of Kuan Yin and also the author's own drawings, which adapt Kuan Yin in an act of practical spirituality, reading art through life and life through art. Each vignette invites the harried caregiver to take a deep breath and meditate on the trials and joys of caring for an aging parent.
In a series of moving vignettes, the author begins by describing a particular representation of Water-Moon Kuan Yin, a Buddhist teacher and goddess associated with compassion, who often sits on a precarious overhang or floats on a flimsy petal. Then Kuan Yin steps out of the frame to join the author in the mundane challenges of caring for her father-transferring his health insurance, struggling with a wheelchair van, managing adult diapers, or playing in the fictions of dementia. From perplexed to poignant to funny, the vignettes record the working-class English of a fading but still wise dad, and they find other human versions of Kuan Yin in a doctor who will still make house calls or kind strangers in the street.The book includes ten both classical representations of Kuan Yin and also the author's own drawings, which adapt Kuan Yin in an act of practical spirituality, reading art through life and life through art. Each vignette invites the harried caregiver to take a deep breath and meditate on the trials and joys of caring for an aging parent.
160 pages, Hardcover
First published April 25, 2008
Ratings & Reviews
Friends & Following
Create a free account to discover what your friends think of this book!
Community Reviews
Displaying 1 - 4 of 4 reviews
October 30, 2018
Snippets of a life lived with an elderly parent. Appreciated the positive spin and humor the author found in probably very difficult circumstances. Initially I found the musings on Kuan Yin to be a distraction from the story of her father, but by the end was rather soothed by his/her presence. A lot of love in these pages.
July 7, 2008
Kathy Phillips writes of her experiences as she takes her aging father from his house in Connecticut into her apartment in Hawai'i. She is middle-aged and single with a Ph.D. in Comparative Literature, but considers herself "a closet religion major." He is a retired fireman who needs a wheelchair and has memory loss.
The author uses the symbolism and iconography associated with Water Moon Quan Yin, a specific aspect of the Buddhist boddhisattva (enlightened soul), to frame her compassion and caring as she copes with the problems and adjustments both people must face in dealing with their new living situation. Anyone who has been in this situation of suddenly caring for an aging parent knows the difficulties of such a change. The author has a brilliant idea to call on the Goddess of Compassion as a guide at this time of her life.
Each chapter begins with a description of some painting or other depiction of Water-Moon Quan Yin pointing out the symbolism and meaning. She then goes on to describe an event in her life with her father that is wonderfully gentle and compassionate (even when the reader can see the frustration and difficulties behind the text). It is in these loving depictions of the process of interpersonal integration that this book is at its best.
The verbal descriptions of Quan Yin and her role in Buddhist thought are well done and ideally suited to the non-academic reader. While a lesser part of the book, they are a joyful addition. I would not recommend this book as a first source for Quan Yin study, but it is a pleasant benefit for those seeking information on elder care.
I feel that the weakest part of the book is the Quan Yin iconography. Either absent, poorly reproduced in black and white plates, or sketched by the author they leave me craving more. The author does provide a 6 page listing of "Sources for Art Works Described or Reproduced" for those like me who cry out for more. However full-color prints would have been a delight to match the gentle prose of the text.
The author uses the symbolism and iconography associated with Water Moon Quan Yin, a specific aspect of the Buddhist boddhisattva (enlightened soul), to frame her compassion and caring as she copes with the problems and adjustments both people must face in dealing with their new living situation. Anyone who has been in this situation of suddenly caring for an aging parent knows the difficulties of such a change. The author has a brilliant idea to call on the Goddess of Compassion as a guide at this time of her life.
Each chapter begins with a description of some painting or other depiction of Water-Moon Quan Yin pointing out the symbolism and meaning. She then goes on to describe an event in her life with her father that is wonderfully gentle and compassionate (even when the reader can see the frustration and difficulties behind the text). It is in these loving depictions of the process of interpersonal integration that this book is at its best.
The verbal descriptions of Quan Yin and her role in Buddhist thought are well done and ideally suited to the non-academic reader. While a lesser part of the book, they are a joyful addition. I would not recommend this book as a first source for Quan Yin study, but it is a pleasant benefit for those seeking information on elder care.
I feel that the weakest part of the book is the Quan Yin iconography. Either absent, poorly reproduced in black and white plates, or sketched by the author they leave me craving more. The author does provide a 6 page listing of "Sources for Art Works Described or Reproduced" for those like me who cry out for more. However full-color prints would have been a delight to match the gentle prose of the text.
March 8, 2009
This book happened to resonate with me - maybe its just the timing of what you read having an impact. This one comes as I experience the "sandwich generation" - fully enjoying the activities of the kids while worrying over aging parents and their needs. This one is a quiet book documenting the author's life with her father over his last five years as he moves in with her. I tended to gloss over the Kuan Yin parts (a Buddhist teacher goddess associated with compassion) but feel like it is something i will return to..... This first read brought insight into patience and to try to have a sense of humor through this difficult process of aging.
January 26, 2010
I really enjoyed the way Kathy Phillips took different elements from and interpretations of various Kuan Yin representations and related them to her experiences as a care giver to her aging father. She reveals the everyday frustrations of trying to get a state-issued ID or the correct Medicare card for her father and the small moments of grace that prove that no matter how the roles may reverse, a parent's instinct to protect his child never go away and she does it all with gentle humor and compassion.
Displaying 1 - 4 of 4 reviews