There Are No Zombies in America

by Robert Holt

There are no zombies in America. Rest assured, President Tump would tell us if there was. With most the globe being swarmed with the living dead, Americans watch with fascination, glued to the 24-hour news cycle and the social media circus to hear all the latest. As things spiral towards chaos with zombie cults rising, armed militias patrolling the streets, and a police state set up to keep peace, there is no escape. You don't need zombies with friends like these.

Robert Holt presents us with a fun political satire/horror hybrid that will keep you flipping the pages to see the atrocities, blasphemies, and phantasmagorical terrors pile up.

"Highly Offensive" -Author's wife

190 pages, Kindle Edition

Published July 20, 2017

Reviews

[Nikki Love · Rating 4 out of 5]

Just read it. Open your mind and enjoy!

There is so much I'd like to say but anything would be spoilers.

So just push the purchase button; open your mind to craziness and some colorful language (cursing I'm alluding to really crass language that most definitely WAS necessary to the story so please don't go all ape poopy).

I'd prefer not to classify this book. I'd prefer to tell you to read it and make of it what you will. But, alas society likes labels. So political satire zombie apocalypse it is. I call it great and wonderful.

This is coming from someone who doesn't typically like stories with zombies. Before reading this book I would say I had read only two great zombie apocalypse type books.

1. I am Legend - Because hey heroes aren't always heroes to everyone.
2. World War Z - Because yes I believe governments would screw things up.

Now I include:

3. There Are No Zombies in America - because it holds a mirror to everyday society while helping you cope with that truth by hiding it behind a zombie story. At the end I hated everyone and of those I hated I loved only a few.

Why did I give it only four stars instead of five if I loved it so much? Um...cause I'm a chicken and it gave me bad dreams and heebie jeebies (hence why I don't read zombie books). But even with that there is no way I can say it was a bad book.

[Kay Ostman · Rating 4 out of 5]

Loaded with action and relatable, flawed characters, this dystopian dark-politicomedy was hard to put down once I started. The only time I set it down was to build a scene in my mind or take some notes, but it was all I could think about until I picked it back up again.

What I liked most about "There are No Zombies in America" was Holt's straight-to-the-point bluntness describing his characters. There's no excessive use of metaphor. While the overall metaphor is implied, the underlying meaning is simple, but enough, and can be applied to historical and current contexts.

There is some profanity and obscenity scattered about the book. I didn't take offense but others may.

There are some grammatical errors. I tend to be a stickler for grammar, but I was able to get past that and enjoy the book. The story was strong enough and the errors did not complicate my reading.

There are three possible "resolutions" mentioned which could be tweaked into more if you have the imagination, but you're ultimately left to draw your own conclusion. If you don't like your first conclusion, you can always try another one.

I've read it twice already and I'll definitely read it again.

[Steve Danner · Rating 5 out of 5]

I don't even know what to say about this book. It's just crazy, over the top ridiculousness and it's GLORIOUS! Now, Robert's style of ridiculous humor matches mine (I should reveal that I actually know Robert...not all that well, but well enough to know his dark sense of humor is close to my own). The book is divided up into the main "novella", which is "There are No Zombies in America" and several short stories. There's 1-2 short stories that I didn't care for at all, but the rest were good to great, on par with the main story. He tells a great, easy to follow story, which should keep you turning those pages! I won't reveal too much about it, but just understand that 1) Robert has a dark sense of humor that is on full display throughout (think Army of Darkness) and 2) he's also very vulgar, which I also find amusing, but may turn off some readers. The short stories are all a little different. The dark sense of humor is kind of turned off, and you get more straight-ahead gory horror. I particularly enjoyed "The Hair Stylist" and "The Murderer at the Cabin". Good job Robert, I look forward to finishing the last few books of yours!

[Anthony O'Connor · Rating 3 out of 5]

Or are there?

A bit mixed. The first story - same name as collection - is a great read. Satirical, funny, desperate and sad all at the same time. It takes up over half the book and is definitely worth a read. Especially now ...
The rest of the stories are short with a horror theme. Ok. But not really my thing.

[Renee Lee · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book is amazing. It was so good, I pulled an all-nighter to finish it. The characters are so real and engaging, that they make the book's premise seem not only realistic but probable. I'd definitely consider it to be one of those stories that everyone needs to read.

[Moona · Rating 5 out of 5]

"There Are No Zombies in America" by Robert Holt is a sharp, darkly humorous satire that expertly blends horror and political commentary. The story cleverly critiques modern society, using the backdrop of a zombie apocalypse—or the lack thereof in America—as a metaphor for the absurdity of current events and media obsession. Holt's writing is witty and engaging, keeping readers hooked as the chaos unfolds. The satire is biting, yet it’s delivered with a playful tone that makes the book both thought-provoking and entertaining. A must-read for fans of horror with a twist of political satire.