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How to get your children to do what you want them to do
Drawing on their successful clinical experiences with thousands of children, a psychiatrist and a psychologist identify major parental pitfalls in dealing with children and explain ways in which clear, direct communication can contribute to the effective molding of children's behavior
124 pages, Hardcover
First published January 1, 1977
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Displaying 1 - 5 of 5 reviews
July 20, 2021
Why on earth is this book out of print?! (And why only 3 stars other peoples!) Yay for hearing about it on a discussion board and being able to buy a beat up old copy that wasn't outrageously priced for this very thin book.
I'm pretty sure the "this is the only child-rearing book you need" on the back cover could actually be true (in regards to child behavior anyway). I just feel like a dolt on a few misbehaviors of my kids after this book told me I already knew how to get my kids to do what I want because I do it all the time (they're pretty well behaved, but drive me crazy on a few things, which makes me snap on occasion), and yet, these things that bother me, for some reason I've tried all the other noneffective ways to coerce them into doing it proposed by all the other books plus those that come naturally to flawed parents (probably because I'm so busy I'm being lazy and trying "easier" non effective ways first)...but since I'm not getting the results I want, why wasn't I doing what I already knew works? Duh.
I have been planning over the last year to basically do what they told me to combat a particular large, ingrained behavior, but I was thinking it was going to take months for it to take effect since I've been battling them so long on this and therefore procrastinated a whole year!, this book was like, nope, it'll take 2-3 times most likely. So, I'm not going to procrastinate anymore and armed with the knowledge of this book, I know I'll not cave into something noneffective again.
LOVE the fact that they aren't telling you what to do or what to make your kids do. I even did a double take on the "if you're fine with letting your kids smoke...." and I knew I was in the 70s. :) (Along with the case study on parents thinking their kid was possessed, yikes) But anyway, it's your values and morals, they don't care what you're wanting to have your kids do, they're simply showing you that you know how to do it already and point it out to you.
I've done the family worksheet delineating what misbehaviors I'm targeting and what I'm going to do about it and will update this review later if it's indeed the only book you need for getting kids to do what you want, but I'm pretty sure it is, because as they said, I already do the one thing that gets my children to behave and it indeed works 99% of the time, so I'm pretty sure I'll be back with a good update.
I'm pretty sure the "this is the only child-rearing book you need" on the back cover could actually be true (in regards to child behavior anyway). I just feel like a dolt on a few misbehaviors of my kids after this book told me I already knew how to get my kids to do what I want because I do it all the time (they're pretty well behaved, but drive me crazy on a few things, which makes me snap on occasion), and yet, these things that bother me, for some reason I've tried all the other noneffective ways to coerce them into doing it proposed by all the other books plus those that come naturally to flawed parents (probably because I'm so busy I'm being lazy and trying "easier" non effective ways first)...but since I'm not getting the results I want, why wasn't I doing what I already knew works? Duh.
I have been planning over the last year to basically do what they told me to combat a particular large, ingrained behavior, but I was thinking it was going to take months for it to take effect since I've been battling them so long on this and therefore procrastinated a whole year!, this book was like, nope, it'll take 2-3 times most likely. So, I'm not going to procrastinate anymore and armed with the knowledge of this book, I know I'll not cave into something noneffective again.
LOVE the fact that they aren't telling you what to do or what to make your kids do. I even did a double take on the "if you're fine with letting your kids smoke...." and I knew I was in the 70s. :) (Along with the case study on parents thinking their kid was possessed, yikes) But anyway, it's your values and morals, they don't care what you're wanting to have your kids do, they're simply showing you that you know how to do it already and point it out to you.
I've done the family worksheet delineating what misbehaviors I'm targeting and what I'm going to do about it and will update this review later if it's indeed the only book you need for getting kids to do what you want, but I'm pretty sure it is, because as they said, I already do the one thing that gets my children to behave and it indeed works 99% of the time, so I'm pretty sure I'll be back with a good update.
September 28, 2021
Mom gave me this book, not only for school, But because I work with kids now. (Not that I really need this book. I got the batch of good behaved kids!)
I Agree with everything in this book, 'cause I've seen it work... On myself. And my brothers.
This is a must read for any new parents, and people planning on doing childcare. And if you are planning on having kids, I definitely recommend it!
I Agree with everything in this book, 'cause I've seen it work... On myself. And my brothers.
This is a must read for any new parents, and people planning on doing childcare. And if you are planning on having kids, I definitely recommend it!
September 7, 2016
Good ideas in raising children.
Thoughts: Avoid using word trying indicate you really don't believe he is capable.
To tell a child to admit crime for a lesser punishment is saying you can keep doing it, if you tell the truth.
"Tell a child often he is bad and he will prove you correct"
Don't use "because I said so" you are teaching him to accept things without reason
"It is okay to not like doing what you have to do. It's even all right that you don't like me at the moment but it is your job and you have to do it!"
Thoughts: Avoid using word trying indicate you really don't believe he is capable.
To tell a child to admit crime for a lesser punishment is saying you can keep doing it, if you tell the truth.
"Tell a child often he is bad and he will prove you correct"
Don't use "because I said so" you are teaching him to accept things without reason
"It is okay to not like doing what you have to do. It's even all right that you don't like me at the moment but it is your job and you have to do it!"
March 24, 2009
Don't give choices to kids who can't handle choices is the basic premise of the book. It may be helpful in the future by focusing on an attitude that tells the kid that we will do this together, or they will do it, not maybe. I think it was helpful...time will tell if and when.
June 2, 2008
influencing your child without them knowing
Displaying 1 - 5 of 5 reviews