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How to Be a Gentleman: What Every Modern Man Needs to Know about Manners and Behaviors to Attract Women
Should you open the door for a lady? Is being kind enough? Can anyone learn to be a real gentleman? In today's society, being a gentleman isn't as simple as it used to be. Advances in equality and changes in style have made the rules harder to define and follow. How to Be a Gentleman: What Every Modern Man Needs to Know about Manners and Behaviors to Attract Women is more than a simple etiquette book. It's a path toward a more confident and attractive way of thinking and living. With this third edition, you'll learn more than what to do and what not to do. You'll learn when, why, how, and what is appropriate in every situation including: What real generosity is and when and how to show it. How proper etiquette includes actions, appearance, and attitude. What you shouldn't say or do in every situation. How patience helps develop meaningful relationships. Why knowledge and literacy are essential. How empathy can change your way of thinking and actions for good. Why chivalry and equality are crucial to respecting women. How positive body language leads to confidence. What having a healthy mental outlook can do for you and your relationships. Start your journey to becoming a true gentleman today with the third edition of How to Be a Gentleman: What Every Modern Man Needs to Know about Manners and Behaviors to Attract Women. This self-improvement book isn't about becoming someone you're not. It's about staying true to yourself while respecting your society and every person you encounter. With each chapter, you'll learn to master a fundamental aspect of posture, behavior, or appearance that makes a real gentleman. Don't let a simple misstep keep you from developing meaningful relationships with women. Scroll up to get your copy today.
94 pages, Paperback
First published September 1, 2014
99 people are currently reading
63 people want to read
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Displaying 1 - 8 of 8 reviews
February 20, 2017
Normally, I don't scrutinize the author of a given book very much. I do believe that most people can, at the very least, express some sort of opinion on a given subject. However, for whatever reason, for this book I couldn't help but question it. On the cover it states "Niel Schreiber presents," but I couldn't help but wonder, "Who the hell is Niel Schreiber and why is he an authority on this subject?"
My attempts at pulling out some sort of article or Wikipedia entry were in vain. It seems Niel Screiber, instead of being popularly known as a gentleman, is instead an author who makes a habit of telling people how to behave in certain ways. This is okay I suppose, given that I have read many philosophies regarding normative behaviors.
There's a difference, however, between telling people how to behave and why that behavior is preferable for some reason. Much of the philosophy I have read takes great strides in explaining why particular behaviors are beneficial, either for yourself or for the community at large. Schreiber is willing to do this at certain points in his book, but largely he rests on the ultimate explanation of "That's what real gentleman do."
This comes down to my ultimate grievance with this book. It is possibly the longest example of the No true Scotsman fallacy I have ever read. A brief recap, the No true Scotsman fallacy goes something like this:
The problem with the No true Scotsman is that it ultimately tries to counter-define the subject to exclude relevant criticisms. It's a type of moving goalposts, ensuring that the "purity" of the concept maintains in the face of assault.
Browsing through the book you'll find many assertions that say, "A real gentleman...," or sometimes even more bluntly, "A real man..." The unfortunate part is that Schreiber offers little or no argument to bolster his assertions, and rests on the idea that the reader will more or less take the abstract concept of a gentleman, likely drawn from traditional imagery (and somewhat antiquated notions).
Additionally, Schreiber seems to be confused about what he's pushing for. The subtitle, as you may note, says, "What Every Man Needs to Know About Manners and Behaviors to Attract Women." However, at certain points Schreiber really tries to make it a point that it's not about attracting women. No, says Schreiber, being a gentleman is about choosing a way of life, and constraining your behaviors for all people. Then on the very next page he'll talk about that conduct in relation to approaching women. It comes off as a somewhat confused message.
The sad part is that, stripped of all its pretense, the book offers some very sound (but very trite) advice about getting along well with others. Be respectful. Be polite. Be generous. Be empathetic. Read more. Dress well. These are not novel ideas, nor does Schreiber do much, in my opinion, of unearthing new perspectives on them. The exception here is generosity, which I believe Schreiber does well in extending the concept into conversation.
All things considered, it's a short book but I wouldn't spend time on it. If you're really curious, go ahead and pick it up and read through it in a day or two. But otherwise there isn't a lot here that you haven't heard before.
My attempts at pulling out some sort of article or Wikipedia entry were in vain. It seems Niel Screiber, instead of being popularly known as a gentleman, is instead an author who makes a habit of telling people how to behave in certain ways. This is okay I suppose, given that I have read many philosophies regarding normative behaviors.
There's a difference, however, between telling people how to behave and why that behavior is preferable for some reason. Much of the philosophy I have read takes great strides in explaining why particular behaviors are beneficial, either for yourself or for the community at large. Schreiber is willing to do this at certain points in his book, but largely he rests on the ultimate explanation of "That's what real gentleman do."
This comes down to my ultimate grievance with this book. It is possibly the longest example of the No true Scotsman fallacy I have ever read. A brief recap, the No true Scotsman fallacy goes something like this:
Person A: "No Scotsman puts sugar on his porridge."
Person B: "But my uncle Angus likes sugar with his porridge."
Person A: "Ah yes, but no true Scotsman puts sugar on his porridge."
The problem with the No true Scotsman is that it ultimately tries to counter-define the subject to exclude relevant criticisms. It's a type of moving goalposts, ensuring that the "purity" of the concept maintains in the face of assault.
Browsing through the book you'll find many assertions that say, "A real gentleman...," or sometimes even more bluntly, "A real man..." The unfortunate part is that Schreiber offers little or no argument to bolster his assertions, and rests on the idea that the reader will more or less take the abstract concept of a gentleman, likely drawn from traditional imagery (and somewhat antiquated notions).
Additionally, Schreiber seems to be confused about what he's pushing for. The subtitle, as you may note, says, "What Every Man Needs to Know About Manners and Behaviors to Attract Women." However, at certain points Schreiber really tries to make it a point that it's not about attracting women. No, says Schreiber, being a gentleman is about choosing a way of life, and constraining your behaviors for all people. Then on the very next page he'll talk about that conduct in relation to approaching women. It comes off as a somewhat confused message.
The sad part is that, stripped of all its pretense, the book offers some very sound (but very trite) advice about getting along well with others. Be respectful. Be polite. Be generous. Be empathetic. Read more. Dress well. These are not novel ideas, nor does Schreiber do much, in my opinion, of unearthing new perspectives on them. The exception here is generosity, which I believe Schreiber does well in extending the concept into conversation.
All things considered, it's a short book but I wouldn't spend time on it. If you're really curious, go ahead and pick it up and read through it in a day or two. But otherwise there isn't a lot here that you haven't heard before.
January 27, 2019
Great read and reference
Every chapter makes you stop and think about who you really are. I'm going to pass to my son to read. I do believe this book will give him the insights to become the man I want him to be.
Every chapter makes you stop and think about who you really are. I'm going to pass to my son to read. I do believe this book will give him the insights to become the man I want him to be.
September 2, 2019
Hear, hear! Guess I'm old-fashioned: I would appreciate more people acting like gentlemen or ladies, eschewing selfishness and greed and developing conscience, kindness, moral imtegrity. Right on! To this author: Wise counsel indeed!
September 6, 2019
This book is perfect for every man who wants to become a gentleman. I liked authors writing style, book is very informative and useful, especially for man. Clear and concise in getting across the theme.
December 2, 2019
The title of the book is a bit misleading with the reference to attracting women. There’s a lot of solid advice in the book, the vast majority of it on how to be gentlemanly in general. Mostly focusing on manners and how gentlemen should act and carry themselves.
February 21, 2023
This was a decent read
Even though this book is only less than 100 pages it has some good information to taking transforming yourself into becoming a gentleman or improve as a gentleman if you happen to already be one.
Even though this book is only less than 100 pages it has some good information to taking transforming yourself into becoming a gentleman or improve as a gentleman if you happen to already be one.
October 19, 2014
*I am not male.*
I liked reading this book a lot. It is short enough for anyone to read in one sitting and gives a lot of "common sense" guidelines that so many people lack- not just men. While I do say a lot of men do act as a modern gentleman naturally, so many men do not. I laughed out loud at the beginning of this book because the term "gentleman" does auto-translates to early 1800's British ton aka Darcy.
I liked that this book gives a list of good manners that shows someone else that: you care, are able to be respectful, have a sense of tact, have the ability to show intelligence and connection even not knowing the subject matter (but knowing so is a bonus.)
I recommend this book to men AND women. It doesn't take long to read and it is wonderful on social skills. Thanks!
I liked reading this book a lot. It is short enough for anyone to read in one sitting and gives a lot of "common sense" guidelines that so many people lack- not just men. While I do say a lot of men do act as a modern gentleman naturally, so many men do not. I laughed out loud at the beginning of this book because the term "gentleman" does auto-translates to early 1800's British ton aka Darcy.
I liked that this book gives a list of good manners that shows someone else that: you care, are able to be respectful, have a sense of tact, have the ability to show intelligence and connection even not knowing the subject matter (but knowing so is a bonus.)
I recommend this book to men AND women. It doesn't take long to read and it is wonderful on social skills. Thanks!
March 12, 2015
Missed the whole title.
As bad as it sounds.
As bad as it sounds.
Displaying 1 - 8 of 8 reviews