Be Cool

by Ben Tanzer

From the comedic, often luminous mind of Ben Tanzer comes a memoir about one of life’s true complexities: being cool. Written in touching vignettes, like snapshots of history, Tanzer eloquently illuminates his past with humor and resolve. From crushing on columnists of Tiger Beat magazine to losing his virginity after his “second attempt to do so”; from his love of Comic Con and Sci-Fi to his struggles with infertility, Be Cool is a confession to a generation of readers, done so with acute precision and utmost trust.

“Ben Tanzer has that ever elusive elixir, that ability to be both funny and poignant simultaneously. These essays have that requisite gallows humor about being a parent, but there’s tenderness oozing from the page, too, a kind of trickling empathy.” —Joshua Mohr, author of Fight Song

374 pages, Paperback

First published February 1, 2017

About the author

Emmy-award winner Ben Tanzer's acclaimed work includes the short story collection UPSTATE, the science fiction novel Orphans and the essay collections Lost in Space and Be Cool. His recent novel The Missing was released in March 2024 by 7.13 Books and was a Chicago Writers Association Book of the Year finalist in the category of Traditional Fiction and his new book After Hours: Scorsese, Grief and the Grammar of Cinema, which Kirkus Reviews calls "A heartfelt if overstuffed tribute to the author’s father and the ameliorative power of art," was released by Ig Publishing in May 2025. Ben is also the host of the long running podcast This Podcast Will Change Your Life and lives in Chicago with his family.

Reviews

[Ben]

It changed my life.

[Robert · Rating 5 out of 5]

I know Ben, have published him previously myself, and we are label mates, so to speak, with Dock Street Press. Truthfully, though, here is a genuinely funny, endearing, mega-talent you come across rarely. Ben is the real deal, not only in his writing, but in real life. His pieces in this memoir are dripping with charm and wit, the whole thing is such an amazingly quick read—which is to say, it was hard to put down—and while I don't read a lot of memoirs, I tend to wish they were more like this: funny, awkward, earnest, sweet, salty, wonderful, gripping. I can't recommend this book enough, can't recommend any of Ben's work enough. Be cool yourself and pick this up. (Had to, with that last line.)

[Steph Post · Rating 5 out of 5]

Best Ben Tanzer yet (and that's saying a lot...)!

[Cija Jefferson]

Welcome to Ben Tanzer’s compound, a magical place where there is, “…art, surfing, tacos and drinking, low slung stucco bungalows or ranch houses in Southern California…” Come through and stay if you like. I think you will. Know that Tanzer’s open about what’s important: family and a daily need to run and write. He’s also got a soft spot for Los Angeles, a place where he imagines casting off the shackles of responsible adulthood, for a more bohemian artist’s life. Then there are the many allusions to the story of Icarus—the boy who flew too close to the sun. His cards are face up. Tanzer asks if that’s cool and then opens the door to invite us in. All are welcome.

Read rest of review here: http://atticusreview.org/review-ben-t...

[Dave Newman · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is a beautiful and honest book about what it means to be alive in the 21st century, to be a sentient being, to be a son and husband and father, to be a boyfriend, to be a drinker, to be a runner, to be an artist, and to be a fuck-up, a fuck-up which is how most of us do not identify but how all of us should. To be alive is to be a fuck-up. Anything else is a lie. Ben Tanzer knows that. Desire, which is what Tanzer means when he says be cool, is everything and it’s a motherfucker. Like his early literary hero, Jim Carroll—who he writes about here wonderfully—and eternal beatnik, Jack Kerouac, Ben Tanzer is on a quest to find out what it means to be on a quest. Unlike Carroll and Kerouac, Tanzer is as close as it gets to being enlightened. No bullshit. No God. No use pretending the world isn’t a total mess. Black people live in poverty. No angelheaded hipsters here. The things we value least, violence for example, are the tools everyone uses. But there is always music. There is always writing. There is booze. There is sex, good and bad and stupid. There are drugs. Tanzer loves drugs. And Frisbee. And whatever happens between drugs and Frisbee. There is family, the one you’re born into and the one you choose. There is, eventually, a wife and children, the joy of that. Tanzer wants to eat the world but he also wants to do as little harm as possible. Realistic? Not remotely. But every page here is filled with kindness and love, Stars Wars and punk rock, beautiful children, a beautiful wife, writers too many to name. Are you going to end up pissing blood? Yes, repeatedly. Knocked out for walking down the street? Of course. Tanzer wants to be a social worker and help foster kids and work at foodbanks. How does that go? It goes. It doesn’t go. It’s a mess, just like getting up in the morning. It’s like Chicago, the city he ends up in. Is he Nelsen Algren? Not remotely. Is he a less scuzzy Irvine Welsh, another Chicago transplant? Absolutely. Tanzer is eternally on the move for something better, something more meaningful, always moving towards the light, always getting a glimpse but not the sun. Hence: he loves running, it saves his life, he breaks a leg, he can’t run, he learns to run again, he runs and runs, he gets old, he gets older, he can’t run like he wants to run, he slows down, he aches, he gets better, he runs. He runs. Such is this book of pain and survival. Get up and fall in love, Ben Tanzer says over and over. It’s embarrassing and so what and beauty, lots of it. Ben Tanzer says repeatedly: be cool. And he means it. Seriously, be cool.

[Robert Vaughan · Rating 5 out of 5]

Had the honor of writing a blurb for this book: "I marveled my way through Be Cool, not just the masterful writing, and nuanced storytelling, but at the emotional symbolic power of every sentence. Tanzer maneuvers through this unusual map with elegance, gripping bravery, humor, reaching soaring heights. Nothing about Be Cool is cheaply earned: not its wondrous impact, or its necessary yet marvelous surprise." Enjoy this (sort of) memoir from an author I have the great fortune of calling my friend.

[Jason Fisk · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book starts out like a Wonder Years episode with Tanzer’s voice walking the reader through awkward, messy, very human, yet beautiful and honest moments as a teenager. Then, the reader follows Tanzer through his past on to some Hunter S. Thompson Fear and Loathing type moments, and we eventually read our way around to the years where he matures into someone who settles down, starts a family, and dedicates his life to helping others (as well as writing and running). Tanzer writes a section in this memoir about his origin story as a writer; I would argue that this entire memoir could be read as an origin story of a writer – much like Anne Lamott’s Bird by Bird or Stephen King’s On Writing. This was a pleasure to read: amusing, sometimes heart breaking, and always engaging.

[Lee Krecklow · Rating 5 out of 5]

Be Cool, which may or may not read like a memoir (sort of), is really more a collection of stories, essays, both funny and devastating. These are Sedaris-like reflections that span decades and coasts, stories that can be plucked out individually, randomly, over time, or swallowed in one big linear gulp.

[Giano Cromley · Rating 5 out of 5]

A great collection that displays Tanzer's singular talents as a writer. By turns funny, sad, joyous, poignant, and painful, these essays will make you feel the range of human emotions -- sometimes within the span of a single paragraph. It's tempting to say this collection represents Peak-Tanzer, but I'm not sure he's finished climbing. So we'll call it Peak-Tanzer, until the next thing he cooks up.

[Keith Pilapil Lesmeister · Rating 5 out of 5]

Beautifully rendered, urgent, honest, and tender. And humorous too. BE COOL is an unflinching collection of essays/memoir that exam relationships, masculinity, and how to live despite everything attempting to hold us back. BE COOL is a fantastic, entertaining, and poignant read.

[Michael Van Kerckhove · Rating 5 out of 5]

Like some other reviewers here, I also know Ben. And now I feel like I know him even better! Great collection of short but often interconnected personal nonfiction pieces. An inspiration on how to approach all of life's goop in one's writing.

A fave quote from the title essay:

"Sometimes during a pause, you find insight and inner peace, a path mysteriously emerging from your previous state of confusion and conflict."

While the context of the quote is very (!) specific, it speaks Big Truth.

[Sara · Rating 5 out of 5]

Tanzer's voice, once again, is everything -- how the prose echoes running: fluid, honest, free, seamless in stride (this is a guy who went to running camp FFS) but there is pain here, too, not in style but in the stories, this is life, after all, there are obstacles and scares and terrible loss, stops and starts and getting the legs going again, but through it all, the intimacy is what pulls (see also: me, stumbling, drenched, lobster red, knife in the knee) -- i'll leave the running metaphors to Tanzer -- but it's that intimacy he establishes, a generosity, writer and reader, side by side, on this worn path, that is what moves us, his pace, oh and he's funny, very funny, too, with a soft spot for nostalgia, what makes Tanzer's writing irresistible and heartfelt and so damn good.

basically I could hang with him all day, so in lieu of that, this.

[Peter · Rating 4 out of 5]

Ben's fiction has always given us glimpses inside his mind, but here, with this memoir, he tears off the filter of fiction and gives us his pure, unadorned life - hopes, dreams, fears, disappointments, triumphs, losses. Much of this seemed familiar, either from the parts he borrowed for his fiction or the many lunches and conversations we've had, but I still often found myself surprised and, yes, even shocked. The book reminds me once again of how lucky I am to have Ben as a great friend.

[Mike Smolarek · Rating 5 out of 5]

A lot has happened to Ben Tanzer during his lifetime so far. From a skiing accident, to a cancer scare of his own after dealing with his father's own cancer diagnosis and death, Tanzer has had a lot to write about, which is good for his readers. As he tells his stories from his "sort of" memoir "Be Cool," it's almost like he is with you, sitting next to you telling you the story in person in you living room. The voice that comes through in the writing makes you feel like you are with him in the doctor's office about to get a scope put somewhere you do not want it put, next to him having a drink on a Thursday night, in his living room as he beams with pride as his sons start to choose reading the things they like. I've read a lot of Tanzer's work and his essays, and in particular "Be Cool" is among his best writing.

[Leesa · Rating 5 out of 5]

I just ruheally love Ben Tanzer books, books by Ben Tanzer, when Ben Tanzer writes things and also Ben Tanzer. It's kind of (one of) My Thing(s). The physical book is really pretty. Dock Street Press makes really pretty books and I like memoirs where I actually feel like I'm getting to know the person better. Memoirs that feel like sleepy 2am bar conversations + the walk home in the rain in the best way. That is this.

[David · Rating 5 out of 5]

There's something about the prose in here that makes me pay just a bit more attention to the world, be a little more forgiving with it and appreciative of it. The tone is unhurried, but insightful. It's intimate in a way that brings forth the urge to remember any kind of similar experiences and attempts to figure out life, which makes it resonate particularly strongly. It's warm, funny, and wicked smart. I just feel a little happier for having read it.

[Andrew Worthington · Rating 5 out of 5]

VERY COOL book. BE COOL and get it.

Here is an interview I did with the author: http://fivequestions.club/post/157432...