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Perfect Halves / Jumatatea Perfecta #1
Double-Edged
Stuck in a rut, Kate takes to internet dating to spice up her life. Little did she know the detour her life was about to take! A mysterious stranger, a far-east adventure and burgeoning romance come together in this fast paced romantic adventure, leaving our heroine out of sorts, depending on a man she's only known a few days.
402 pages, Paperback
Published July 30, 2016
4 people are currently reading
321 people want to read
About the author
Rowena Dawn
41 books26 followersBorn in Europe, some time ago, she started loving books very early and the next step was easy: writing became a dream and a purpose. She enjoys writing and baking - these two work very well hand in hand, and she enjoys spending time with her dog - or at least most of the time, as he is a hellion.
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Displaying 1 - 8 of 8 reviews
August 22, 2016
Kate is bullied into internet dating by her friend, Ellie, against her will. She meets Ryan and develops strong feelings for him that make her do things she wouldn't normally do, like offer him a loan before they ever meet. She takes a holiday and embarks on the journey to meet him which leads to a romantic interlude and a marriage.
The story has potential, but its readability is hampered by the technical aspects of writing. The whole story has a beginning and a progressive middle, but the ending is not there. If it was a film, I would say there is no ACT 3. The writer builds up expectation with hints of danger and mystery, but does not bring it to the climax. The end is abrupt and unsatisfying. Many interesting leads are not followed through. Why can't Kate read Ryan's mind? Why does Adam feel her reading his mind? Yet she had been doing that all along to other people and there were no complications. This special ability is outstanding in her character but not in the story itself. Then there is the unceremonious shifting of POV within the same scene or chapter which made me lose focus and too many adverbs I lost count. The author's style can be improved on to take the story to another level.
The story has potential, but its readability is hampered by the technical aspects of writing. The whole story has a beginning and a progressive middle, but the ending is not there. If it was a film, I would say there is no ACT 3. The writer builds up expectation with hints of danger and mystery, but does not bring it to the climax. The end is abrupt and unsatisfying. Many interesting leads are not followed through. Why can't Kate read Ryan's mind? Why does Adam feel her reading his mind? Yet she had been doing that all along to other people and there were no complications. This special ability is outstanding in her character but not in the story itself. Then there is the unceremonious shifting of POV within the same scene or chapter which made me lose focus and too many adverbs I lost count. The author's style can be improved on to take the story to another level.
October 1, 2016
The premise of this book is appealing and the beginning appears to set us up nicely for some intrigue, romance and mystery. However, there were a number of issues that kept me from fully engaging with the story. First, there were inconsistent and unexpected POV shifts, leading to a number of moments where I'm genuinely confused about which character is speaking / thinking. Second, I found the male lead to be unlikable in the extreme and couldn't understand why the female lead was still interested in him. I think part of this is because we were told much about his character, why he was appealing to her, but never shown this. Instead, we were always shown his irrational, sometimes hysterical, even verbally abusive behaviors. I just flat-out did not like him.
Much of the romance happens off the page, and we're simply told Kate and Ryan have been communicating on-line and in a series of phone calls that we never really get to witness. Instead, we're given a description of what happens and that description, to me, isn't romantic, but instead is a list of stalking behaviors. Ryan's persistence, despite Kate's stated preferences, doesn't come across as romantic, but instead as aggressive and dangerous. And then he asks for money. All of these behaviors are such red flags for me, I had a really hard time understanding Kate's motivation in continuing to dialogue with this crazy guy. In essence, it was hard for me suspend my disbelief.
On a technical note, it took me a while to figure out that the book wasn't moving backward in time, but rather that the author had mislabeled a number of the chapters, using "earlier" when she really meant "later". Once I figured this out, things started to make better sense. The ending felt incomplete, and I don't really mean cliffhanger incomplete. Rather, it was like the reader was supposed to feel as if things had been resolved enough for this story to satisfy and that a bigger resolution would come in book two. However, instead, it simply felt as if book one ended, without any real resolution at all.
Overall, I think there were some really great ideas and the seeds for a great story here, but the execution could be smoother. A more thorough editing job would help. Fleshing out some scenes so that we're shown rather than told how appealing Ryan is to Kate and a much more developed ending would also enhance this book significantly. I wish I could rate this higher because, as I said, the potential is definitely there. It simply isn't fully executed yet.
Much of the romance happens off the page, and we're simply told Kate and Ryan have been communicating on-line and in a series of phone calls that we never really get to witness. Instead, we're given a description of what happens and that description, to me, isn't romantic, but instead is a list of stalking behaviors. Ryan's persistence, despite Kate's stated preferences, doesn't come across as romantic, but instead as aggressive and dangerous. And then he asks for money. All of these behaviors are such red flags for me, I had a really hard time understanding Kate's motivation in continuing to dialogue with this crazy guy. In essence, it was hard for me suspend my disbelief.
On a technical note, it took me a while to figure out that the book wasn't moving backward in time, but rather that the author had mislabeled a number of the chapters, using "earlier" when she really meant "later". Once I figured this out, things started to make better sense. The ending felt incomplete, and I don't really mean cliffhanger incomplete. Rather, it was like the reader was supposed to feel as if things had been resolved enough for this story to satisfy and that a bigger resolution would come in book two. However, instead, it simply felt as if book one ended, without any real resolution at all.
Overall, I think there were some really great ideas and the seeds for a great story here, but the execution could be smoother. A more thorough editing job would help. Fleshing out some scenes so that we're shown rather than told how appealing Ryan is to Kate and a much more developed ending would also enhance this book significantly. I wish I could rate this higher because, as I said, the potential is definitely there. It simply isn't fully executed yet.
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November 15, 2020Unfortunately, I didn’t like anything about this book. The main character is Kate, a Montreal woman who becomes involved with Ryan, a man she meets online. He asks her for money, and after a little soul-searching, she travels across the world so she can deliver it to him personally and size him up.
What she learns about Ryan and his predicament is the driving force of the latter part of the book, and is very poorly explained and unrealistic; there’s some sort of special missions task force and an unseen, undescribed enemy with unknown motives (explained haphazardly, like an afterthought, in a few lines of the epilogue). It all reads as only the set-up for a story – but in this case it’s also nearly two-thirds of the book. What’s more, we learn that Ryan met Kate after deciding to combine his dire need for help with four months of internet dating and courtship. I tried hard to suspend my disbelief, but this narrative device just does not make sense. With only this to build on, most of the plot feels arbitrary, over-complicated and ill-explained.
I can’t say I was drawn into the romance either. I didn’t feel like Kate had any real personality to speak of, and Ryan came across as sleazy and disingenuous. He is also emotionally and physically abusive, and most of his interactions with and about Kate centre on him flying off the rails every time another man speaks to her. They argue about all manner of other things too, often at bizarrely inappropriate moments. I believe this sparring was supposed to be part of the charm of their relationship, but it’s never playful or trivial. They have petty disagreements and poke holes in one another. Furthermore, there’s no tenderness to balance it out with. I found I didn’t believe in the romance building between them, as we’re not really shown any evidence of it – ‘show, don’t tell’ would be my advice to the author for this and many other incidences of exposition throughout – and this whole opening section is brief and unsatisfying. By the time Ryan asks Kate for money, I was unsure if this was a romance novel or a cautionary tale.
The overall standard of the prose could be greatly improved. I hate to say it, but I got the impression from a few of the grammar and syntax mistakes – and some of the words they’ve mixed up – that English is not the author’s first language; something a reader definitely shouldn’t notice or infer. Very many of the sentences were clumsily phrased and poorly punctuated. Any potential tension was obliterated by the jagged pacing and muddled tone. The dialogue is stunted and unnatural, and there are a lot of boring interactions. At one point Kate and Ryan eschew the potentially intriguing topic of Ryan’s secrets in favour of discussing the contents of the fridge. In another they discuss the logistics of running out for groceries in the middle of a car-chase.
There are a lot of other descriptions like this; the fact that Kate brushes her hair before she takes a shower to make sure she can comb through the tangles later when it’s wet; the full compliment of meals she does and doesn’t eat while on a plane, as well as when she sleeps during the journey and for how long.
Even considering all this, the novel is very short, which speaks to how few words are devoted to any real semblance of a story. On top of all this, I was put off by some insulting and archaic gender stereotypes (mainly of men but several of women), and Kate’s narratively inconsequential ability to read minds! I wish I could have found the positive in this book, and I’m pleased to see others have enjoyed it far more than I did, but I found it very difficult to finish, and I have to give it one star.
What she learns about Ryan and his predicament is the driving force of the latter part of the book, and is very poorly explained and unrealistic; there’s some sort of special missions task force and an unseen, undescribed enemy with unknown motives (explained haphazardly, like an afterthought, in a few lines of the epilogue). It all reads as only the set-up for a story – but in this case it’s also nearly two-thirds of the book. What’s more, we learn that Ryan met Kate after deciding to combine his dire need for help with four months of internet dating and courtship. I tried hard to suspend my disbelief, but this narrative device just does not make sense. With only this to build on, most of the plot feels arbitrary, over-complicated and ill-explained.
I can’t say I was drawn into the romance either. I didn’t feel like Kate had any real personality to speak of, and Ryan came across as sleazy and disingenuous. He is also emotionally and physically abusive, and most of his interactions with and about Kate centre on him flying off the rails every time another man speaks to her. They argue about all manner of other things too, often at bizarrely inappropriate moments. I believe this sparring was supposed to be part of the charm of their relationship, but it’s never playful or trivial. They have petty disagreements and poke holes in one another. Furthermore, there’s no tenderness to balance it out with. I found I didn’t believe in the romance building between them, as we’re not really shown any evidence of it – ‘show, don’t tell’ would be my advice to the author for this and many other incidences of exposition throughout – and this whole opening section is brief and unsatisfying. By the time Ryan asks Kate for money, I was unsure if this was a romance novel or a cautionary tale.
The overall standard of the prose could be greatly improved. I hate to say it, but I got the impression from a few of the grammar and syntax mistakes – and some of the words they’ve mixed up – that English is not the author’s first language; something a reader definitely shouldn’t notice or infer. Very many of the sentences were clumsily phrased and poorly punctuated. Any potential tension was obliterated by the jagged pacing and muddled tone. The dialogue is stunted and unnatural, and there are a lot of boring interactions. At one point Kate and Ryan eschew the potentially intriguing topic of Ryan’s secrets in favour of discussing the contents of the fridge. In another they discuss the logistics of running out for groceries in the middle of a car-chase.
There are a lot of other descriptions like this; the fact that Kate brushes her hair before she takes a shower to make sure she can comb through the tangles later when it’s wet; the full compliment of meals she does and doesn’t eat while on a plane, as well as when she sleeps during the journey and for how long.
Even considering all this, the novel is very short, which speaks to how few words are devoted to any real semblance of a story. On top of all this, I was put off by some insulting and archaic gender stereotypes (mainly of men but several of women), and Kate’s narratively inconsequential ability to read minds! I wish I could have found the positive in this book, and I’m pleased to see others have enjoyed it far more than I did, but I found it very difficult to finish, and I have to give it one star.
November 21, 2016
I received a copy of this story in exchange for an honest review.
In this story, Kate, the female protagonist, is being pursued by Ryan whom she met online dating, and who asks her for loans, and refuses to give up. If I was in Kate’s shoes, I would have called the police on Ryan before the story progressed much further, and/or filed a restraining order against him. Instead, something entirely different happens.
While the story’s main idea is interesting, there were several issues that made it difficult for me to get into the story and care about the characters.
The writing was awkward, there were more adverbs than necessary, and there were too many helping/linking verbs (too many wases and weres). An example of awkward wording: ‘“…no worries,” she said, smiling apologetically to the young man full of hope.’ Could be switch for smoother wording like: -‘”…no worries,” she said, offering an apologetic smile to the hopeful young man.’-
Also, the story fails to be consistent in POV. Too often, the narrative shows the reader things the character, whose mind the reader is supposed to be in, things that character would not know about. This is a violation of POV. An example of that: “Deep in thought, she failed to notice the man behind the column, watching her, although she could feel the fine hair on her neck stand straight up.” We’re in her mind, seeing what she’s seeing, and if she doesn’t see the man behind the column, we shouldn’t either. Even in 3rd person omniscient, there are limits when the reader is in the current character's head. If it's important for the reader to know someone is watching her, the author could instead have the character's neck prickle, look up, and see something duck back behind a pillar. Or, the narration could come to a scene break, and then we could go into the head of the man watching her. That way we're not still in Kate's head when we see him and she doesn't.
Also, only dialogue should be put into quotes, not thoughts. Putting thoughts into quotes can potentially confuse the reader.
Instead of something like: “Wow,” she thought, “he’s such a jerk.” The sentence could avoid confusion by putting Wow, and he's such a jerk, in italics.
In addition, there are abrupt point of view shifts that make the narrative confusing. Often, the narration jumps between Kate’s and Ryan’s heads so fast, I don’t know who’s thinking what, and I become confused in a bad way. A general rule, to avoid confusion, is only switch POV between chapters, or at the very least, between breaks separated by dingbats.
It’s a good idea to avoid having the same word in the same sentence as much as possible, and that happens more often than necessary in this story. For example: “She checked everything again to be sure that everything was in order and then…” could be switched out for: “She checked everything again to be sure that all was in order and then…”
While the premise is intriguing, everything seems a bit too hard for me to swallow. The characters don’t seem plausible, at least to me. Their actions and motivations seem inconsistent, and the story doesn’t convince me to suspend my disbelief.
Again, though, the plot has an intriguing premise. I think if the story were to be passed by a professional editor for both copy and line editing, it would considerably improve a promising story.
In this story, Kate, the female protagonist, is being pursued by Ryan whom she met online dating, and who asks her for loans, and refuses to give up. If I was in Kate’s shoes, I would have called the police on Ryan before the story progressed much further, and/or filed a restraining order against him. Instead, something entirely different happens.
While the story’s main idea is interesting, there were several issues that made it difficult for me to get into the story and care about the characters.
The writing was awkward, there were more adverbs than necessary, and there were too many helping/linking verbs (too many wases and weres). An example of awkward wording: ‘“…no worries,” she said, smiling apologetically to the young man full of hope.’ Could be switch for smoother wording like: -‘”…no worries,” she said, offering an apologetic smile to the hopeful young man.’-
Also, the story fails to be consistent in POV. Too often, the narrative shows the reader things the character, whose mind the reader is supposed to be in, things that character would not know about. This is a violation of POV. An example of that: “Deep in thought, she failed to notice the man behind the column, watching her, although she could feel the fine hair on her neck stand straight up.” We’re in her mind, seeing what she’s seeing, and if she doesn’t see the man behind the column, we shouldn’t either. Even in 3rd person omniscient, there are limits when the reader is in the current character's head. If it's important for the reader to know someone is watching her, the author could instead have the character's neck prickle, look up, and see something duck back behind a pillar. Or, the narration could come to a scene break, and then we could go into the head of the man watching her. That way we're not still in Kate's head when we see him and she doesn't.
Also, only dialogue should be put into quotes, not thoughts. Putting thoughts into quotes can potentially confuse the reader.
Instead of something like: “Wow,” she thought, “he’s such a jerk.” The sentence could avoid confusion by putting Wow, and he's such a jerk, in italics.
In addition, there are abrupt point of view shifts that make the narrative confusing. Often, the narration jumps between Kate’s and Ryan’s heads so fast, I don’t know who’s thinking what, and I become confused in a bad way. A general rule, to avoid confusion, is only switch POV between chapters, or at the very least, between breaks separated by dingbats.
It’s a good idea to avoid having the same word in the same sentence as much as possible, and that happens more often than necessary in this story. For example: “She checked everything again to be sure that everything was in order and then…” could be switched out for: “She checked everything again to be sure that all was in order and then…”
While the premise is intriguing, everything seems a bit too hard for me to swallow. The characters don’t seem plausible, at least to me. Their actions and motivations seem inconsistent, and the story doesn’t convince me to suspend my disbelief.
Again, though, the plot has an intriguing premise. I think if the story were to be passed by a professional editor for both copy and line editing, it would considerably improve a promising story.
August 31, 2016
Review made possible via a free copy provided by the author.
Double-Edged begins will all the intrigue and intensity of a 1960s crime noir. Kate is a gorgeous, independent woman with the ability to read anyone’s thoughts, including those at the other end of a phone conversation. However, despite a successful life, she doesn’t have the one thing she wants – a partner who can stand with her toe to toe. A friend cajoles her to join a dating website, which leads not to some pedantic love story but rather to a handsome stranger desperate for help in a far-flung country.
Unfortunately, beyond the first few chapters, Double-Edged fails to deliver on its promise of a sexy thriller. On the surface, the undeniable attraction of two diametrically opposed characters – the fiercely independent Kate and the alpha male Ryan – has all the makings of a rollicking good tale. However, neither our heroes nor the supporting cast develop beyond poorly drawn archetypes and stilted storytelling.
The dialogue doesn’t help as every character in Double-Edged says exactly what they’re thinking. The reader is left being told a significant number of plot and character details without actually seeing them happen. For example, we know Kate is attracted to Ryan because of his rich banter. However, we see little wit and only childish rage and made-for-another-age machismo.
I think the story would benefit from a round of editing from the perspective of knowing which questions the story raises and how many were answered. Ultimately, I was left asking too many questions and searching for too few answers to truly enjoy the story.
In spite of all these questions, Rowena Dawn keeps the pages turning with a fine understanding of what to reveal when. The first few chapters are some of the finest I’ve read in creating suspense and assured I would keep reading. Unfortunately, the rest of Double-Edged couldn’t keep up with its promising beginning.
Double-Edged begins will all the intrigue and intensity of a 1960s crime noir. Kate is a gorgeous, independent woman with the ability to read anyone’s thoughts, including those at the other end of a phone conversation. However, despite a successful life, she doesn’t have the one thing she wants – a partner who can stand with her toe to toe. A friend cajoles her to join a dating website, which leads not to some pedantic love story but rather to a handsome stranger desperate for help in a far-flung country.
Unfortunately, beyond the first few chapters, Double-Edged fails to deliver on its promise of a sexy thriller. On the surface, the undeniable attraction of two diametrically opposed characters – the fiercely independent Kate and the alpha male Ryan – has all the makings of a rollicking good tale. However, neither our heroes nor the supporting cast develop beyond poorly drawn archetypes and stilted storytelling.
The dialogue doesn’t help as every character in Double-Edged says exactly what they’re thinking. The reader is left being told a significant number of plot and character details without actually seeing them happen. For example, we know Kate is attracted to Ryan because of his rich banter. However, we see little wit and only childish rage and made-for-another-age machismo.
I think the story would benefit from a round of editing from the perspective of knowing which questions the story raises and how many were answered. Ultimately, I was left asking too many questions and searching for too few answers to truly enjoy the story.
In spite of all these questions, Rowena Dawn keeps the pages turning with a fine understanding of what to reveal when. The first few chapters are some of the finest I’ve read in creating suspense and assured I would keep reading. Unfortunately, the rest of Double-Edged couldn’t keep up with its promising beginning.
August 29, 2016
This is a highly entertaining Romance that, although I am not a huge fan of the genre, kept my full attention. It has a European flair, and I imagined this type of love and soulmate connection happening in somewhere like Venice. It is also thrilling for those who act on feeling and jump into something new, getting swept off their feet. I loved the excitement brought in this book. The writing was just a little awkward at times, with a few editing errors, but otherwise, this is a very good read for anyone who wants to imagine a life of spontanaity and real love!
August 21, 2016
I was assigned this title in a bookgroup and was asked to give an honest review.
As a young beginning writer Rowena Dawn maybe has the X-factor. Although she struggles with some technical issues that makes reading of this book sometimes confusing, I think she can improve this. In the first part of the story she is capable to increase the tension. After that the tension decreased. Dubble-Edged is a nice story and author Rowena Dawn is promissing author!
As a young beginning writer Rowena Dawn maybe has the X-factor. Although she struggles with some technical issues that makes reading of this book sometimes confusing, I think she can improve this. In the first part of the story she is capable to increase the tension. After that the tension decreased. Dubble-Edged is a nice story and author Rowena Dawn is promissing author!
September 27, 2018
great book
Displaying 1 - 8 of 8 reviews