For All The Men (and Some of The Women) I've Known

by Danila Botha

For All The Men (and Some of The Women) I’ve Known explores the complexity of relationships, from love to betrayal. In the book’s unforgettable stories, Botha creates characters so authentic, readers are convinced that they know the characters personally. Botha excels at blending literary techniques with popular zeitgeist, creating stories that read like a combination of Liar by Lynn Crosbie with Lena Dunham’s "Girls." With her signature honesty, Botha exposes the desire for human connection above all things. The collection is hopeful, fearless and utterly relatable.

160 pages, Paperback

Published October 1, 2016

About the author

Danila Botha is the author of the critically acclaimed short story collections, Got No Secrets, For All the Men (and Some of the Women) I’ve Known, which was a finalist for the Trillium Book Award, The Vine Awards and the ReLit Award and most recently, Things that Cause Inappropriate Happiness. Things that Cause Inappropriate Happiness won an Indie Reader Discovery Award for Women's Issues, Fiction, and was a finalist for the Canadian Book Club Awards, the Next Generation Indie Book Awards and the National Indie Excellence Book Awards. She is also the author of the award-winning novel Too Much On the Inside, which was optioned for film by Pelee Entertainment. Her new novel, A Place for People Like Us will be published in Sept 2025.
Her first graphic novel, Vidal, which she wrote and illustrated will be published in 2026 by At Bay Press.
She is always working on new short fiction.

Reviews

[Jim Fisher · Rating 4 out of 5]

I became an instant fan of Toronto author Danila Botha after reading her first full-length novel, Too Much on the Inside (2015, Quattro Books) last year, concluding: "This is an impressive first novel from this young, energetic author and it is my hope that more titles will be forthcoming."
I didn't have too long of a wait, for Ms Botha has just released a collection of new short stories entitled For All of the Men (and Some of the Women) I've Known (2016, Tightrope Books). There are eighteen stories, all grouped under various headings such as Meeting, Falling In, Falling Out, Friendship and finally, Resolution. As you can guess, these stories are all about personal relationships and its various stages. Here, Ms Botha is at her best and she has noticeably matured in her writing since releasing the small short story collection Got No Secrets in 2010 (also from Tightrope Books), a group of rather 'raw' stories of the victims of addiction, abuse, rape and suicide based on her volunteer work with Na-Me-Res, an organisation benefiting the homeless.
Yes, Ms Botha's writing has definitely matured, and now she writes about relationships from a different focal point: more experienced, the characters a bit older, but no less afflicted with life's problems, whether it is a new bride emotionally abused by her new mother-in-law and sister-in-law in "My Second Family", childhood friends who help each other through their addiction issues in "The Womanizer", a woman who converts to Judaism for the man she loves in "It's Our Life", or the betrayal of love by successful lawyer in "How People Work" all are stories that hold out a promising 'light-at-the-end-of-the-tunnel' type of ending; the person (usually the woman) coming out of the ordeal, stronger, wiser, more in touch with herself than ever before. Take for instance "The Keeper of Your Secrets" about a woman who is a veteran of several failed relationships, including a marriage. She finally meets someone online and they hit it off together. Ms Botha's character concludes:
"You are sure that there is something miraculous about the way you managed to find each other. You hope that, somehow, you'll manage to keep each other."
As a short story addict, I devoured this collection, and I hope Ms Botha continues to hone her craft producing more stories with that healthy touch of realism that she has come to be recognised for.

[Norman Feliks Jezioranski · Rating 2 out of 5]

You can read my review on the Broken Pencil website. http://www.brokenpencil.com/news/book...

[Heather Babcock · Rating 5 out of 5]

Strong in prose and vulnerable in its honesty, "For All The Men (and Some of The Women) I've Known" is an evocative collection of short stories that will resonate with anyone who has ever loved, had their heart busted and rose from the ashes to love again.

Refreshingly, Botha grants her stories of friendship and sexual love with the same sense of reverence afforded to the tales of romantic love. A story involving the death of an estranged best friend is both touching and haunting; while another tale, in which the narrator reveals her involvement with a cruel sadist, is expertly paced and truly terrifying.

Highly recommended.

[Deepa Rajagopalan · Rating 5 out of 5]

Loved this collection of short stories. I was amazed at the richness of the characters, the specific yet universal heartaches and the incredibly strong voices. The characters lingered with me for days after I finished the book.
I highly recommend!

[K.R. Wilson · Rating 4 out of 5]

For All The Men And Some Of The Women I’ve Known is an engaging collection of tight, sometimes vignette-like relationship stories, grouped thematically (Meeting, Falling In, Falling Out, etc) and with a nice cumulative power. Sadly I could only find it used.

[Erin · Rating 4 out of 5]

A great collection that handles vulnerability extremely well.

[Chloe Youmans · Rating 5 out of 5]

such an amazing collection of short stories by a Canadian author! a lot of which were based in Toronto! so interesting I didn’t want to the stories to end!

[Wayne Ng · Rating 5 out of 5]

Danila Botha's eighteen charming stories about love, romance and relationships in today's hook-up minefield are gems.
Think Amazon's Modern Love series, but with less saccharin and more grit.
Botha has a deft, teasing touch and a fluid, accessible voice that brings her characters and their fractured lives alive. While this is bingeworthy, you'll want to space these nuggets out like chocolate truffle treats. Or just binge.
My favs were: The Womanizer, It’s Our Life, Used Condoms, and You’re In Love With Me.

[Karen Green · Rating 5 out of 5]

I met Danila in 2012 while I was attending a respected week-long writing program in Toronto. She was on a panel of breakout authors who had attended the program in a previous year. Of the half-dozen panelists, only Danila stood out to me. She was so real, so genuine; her words, stories, and advice were enthusiastic and astute, and I liked her instantly.

Everything that made Danila stand out that day translates to her writing, and her latest collection is no exception. Genuine, astute, real - the stories in For All The Men reveal moments of young, urban love that are often uncomfortably relatable. And the stories do what short stories do best (when written well): they plunge you into a life, a scene, a moment and force you to try to find your bearings. And once you do, of course it must all be taken away, sometimes in a raging gust, sometimes just by leaving the ends to fray quietly until there's nothing recognizable left, and the reader is forced to look around at the (sometimes very subtle) decay and wonder - deliciously - how we got here. And in the case of Danila's book, I was also left very much wondering how I could stay longer.

[Priya Ramsingh · Rating 5 out of 5]

Real love stories about real people. Danila Botha is a talented writer that is brave enough to discuss real issues and struggles faced by people as they search for love in the modern world. A great read.