First Born of an Ass

by William Joyce

An erratic but highly original first novel that sends up the American Dream through riotously and relentlessly scatological means. Gorm, Joyce's hero, is the perennial childhood loser--motherless, unintelligent, bullied by the likes of Pumperdink the Pukeroo and Jism Jack Rogers--until the day he sees a matchbook ad for Charles Atlas and embarks on a body-building course that makes him look like a Nathanael West hero on steroids. His deltoids make him a hero in school and a celebrity throughout his 1950's Pittsburgish town (especially after he spontaneously evolves into a mesmerizing street-corner corset salesman); but he still can't figure out how to develop the member between his legs or kick his obsession with his bowels and their treacherous movements (he swallowed a ball bearing as a child). Finally, when his former babysitter and body-building coach Mrs. Vidoni dies, Gorm lugs her body all over town, scarcely noticing that she's dead, and hangs her excised wart over his weight-lifting bench before strutting his stuff--which he does in a climactic physical-culture contest that confirms Joyce's Swiftian view of human culture. After a darkly, prodigiously inventive opening section, the fantasy gradually hardens into a shock-the-bourgeois mode. Or do Joyce's undeniable gilts just outstay their welcome?

231 pages, Paperback

First published November 1, 1989

About the author

Librarian Note: There is more than one author in the Goodreads database with this name.

Reviews

[Les Edgerton]

REVIEW
FIRST BORN OF AN ASS
William Joyce

Profane and profound...

I’ve never written a review like this and am unlikely to ever do so again. The reason is I’ve never been totally thunderstruck by a book such as William Joyce’s First Born of an Ass. In lieu of a review, in which I am unable to do its genius even close to suitable justice, I’m going to use the email I sent to William Joyce, upon reading its last page. I cannot say what this book did to me better.
Mr. William Joyce, I just finished FIRST BORN OF AN ASS. I am utterly unworthy to write a review, but I shall try. This is the book God would have written if He could write.
Your book has leaped over all books I've read in my lifetime. I cannot talk about it now. I don't know if I'll ever be able to talk about it.
I am going to go to bed and try to figure out who I am. To be honest, I am shattered. I don't think I'll ever be able to write again and that is the truth. One thing I do know; when I am able I am going to do everything in my power to get this book reissued. This is far, far beyond Nobel Prize worthy.
Thank you for the gift of your genius.
Respectfully,
Les Edgerton
That is the email I sent him. I realize this opinion is firmly attached to whatever small literary reputation I may have and that may be considered risky and even foolhardy. But, I fully stand by it. I will not compromise what I feel about this book in the least, reputation and all that be damned. If you can point out a better book, I’ll read it. And, if there is a better book out there, then we all might as well give up.
The only action people should take is to get this book reissued or republished. Please read it.
--Les Edgerton, Author, The Rapist, The Bitch, Monday’s Meal and others.
End of review
P.S. William Joyce is still alive and living in St. Augustine, FL. He embodies the very concept of "writer." He is virtually destitute and has been making his living by playing his harmonica outside of restaurants for coins until the police made him cease. The only place you can buy most of his books are from used copies via abebooks and the like... of which he doesn't realize a cent. He has a new novel written, but it's in a storage locker in Miami and he's trying to get enough money to get down there and retrieve it and send it to an agent and publisher. If anyone is in a position to help him out, please let me know. In my opinion, he's a national treasure. He does have one book available as an ebook, a collection of essays, under one of his pen names, Guillermo O'Joyce, titled MILLER, BUKOWSKI & THEIR ENEMIES. He does realize royalties from this one, so please consider glomming onto a copy. Thank you.