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The Things You Have to Do Before I Buy You a Phone
Because Punching Your Thumbs Against Screens Isn’t Life
With our kids glued to electronics earlier than ever, we’re watching technology overthrow the wildness of childhood. We’ve unintentionally deprived them of all the unique coming-of-age experiences we grew up exploring the neighborhood, learning skills the hard way, triumphing over boredom. The Things You Have to Do Before I Buy You a Phone is your field guide to resurrecting core childhood—a playful, practical checklist packed with fifty adventures that will give your kids independence, curiosity, and grit.
More than a book, it’s a bonding project. On their own or by your side, your kids will learn to cook dinner (and clean up!), navigate the world without GPS, get paid for a skill, catch a fish, write a decent thank-you note, and much more. It’s an exciting set of challenges with an irresistible their very own phone. With humor and heart, Adam Ferguson offers a road map for raising capable, well-rounded kids in a screen-saturated world.
The phone can wait. The memories can’t. Dive in and see how far this list takes you, together.
With our kids glued to electronics earlier than ever, we’re watching technology overthrow the wildness of childhood. We’ve unintentionally deprived them of all the unique coming-of-age experiences we grew up exploring the neighborhood, learning skills the hard way, triumphing over boredom. The Things You Have to Do Before I Buy You a Phone is your field guide to resurrecting core childhood—a playful, practical checklist packed with fifty adventures that will give your kids independence, curiosity, and grit.
More than a book, it’s a bonding project. On their own or by your side, your kids will learn to cook dinner (and clean up!), navigate the world without GPS, get paid for a skill, catch a fish, write a decent thank-you note, and much more. It’s an exciting set of challenges with an irresistible their very own phone. With humor and heart, Adam Ferguson offers a road map for raising capable, well-rounded kids in a screen-saturated world.
The phone can wait. The memories can’t. Dive in and see how far this list takes you, together.
116 pages, Hardcover
Published July 1, 2025
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Displaying 1 - 2 of 2 reviews
June 3, 2026
The Things You Have to Do Before I Buy You a Phone by Adam Ferguson is a thoughtful, practical, and highly relatable guide that addresses one of the biggest modern parenting challenges: how to raise capable, independent, and emotionally grounded children in an increasingly screen-dominated world.
What makes the book especially effective is its balance between humor, practicality, and emotional sincerity. Rather than simply criticizing technology or promoting unrealistic parenting ideals, Ferguson offers an engaging framework that encourages children to develop real world experiences, confidence, and life skills before becoming fully immersed in digital devices.
The concept itself is immediately compelling. The idea of creating a list of meaningful experiences and responsibilities before receiving a phone transforms what could have been a restrictive rule into something adventurous, motivational, and growth-oriented. It shifts the focus away from punishment or limitation and toward preparation, maturity, and shared family experiences.
What stands out most is the emphasis on core childhood experiences that many families feel are slowly disappearing. The challenges encourage curiosity, independence, resilience, creativity, and practical problem-solving in ways that feel refreshing and grounded. Learning to cook, navigate without GPS, earn money through effort, write thoughtful thank-you notes, and engage with the world directly all reinforce valuable life skills that extend far beyond childhood.
Another major strength of the book is its accessibility. The writing style is conversational, humorous, and encouraging, making the ideas feel achievable rather than overwhelming. Ferguson avoids sounding preachy or overly rigid, which allows the book to resonate with parents who may themselves be struggling to balance technology with healthier developmental experiences for their children.
The emotional core of the book is equally powerful. Beneath the practical activities is a larger message about connection, memory-making, and intentional parenting. The book recognizes that childhood is shaped not only by convenience and entertainment, but also by challenge, exploration, boredom, responsibility, and shared moments between parents and children.
The structure of the checklist format also works extremely well because it transforms the reading experience into an interactive family project rather than passive advice. Parents and children can approach the book together, creating opportunities for bonding while building confidence and independence along the way.
At its core, The Things You Have to Do Before I Buy You a Phone is not really about delaying technology, it’s about preserving experiences that help children become resilient, capable, curious, and connected human beings before the digital world fully takes over their attention. It is a timely, engaging, and meaningful parenting guide with strong appeal for modern families searching for healthier ways to navigate childhood in the age of screens.
What makes the book especially effective is its balance between humor, practicality, and emotional sincerity. Rather than simply criticizing technology or promoting unrealistic parenting ideals, Ferguson offers an engaging framework that encourages children to develop real world experiences, confidence, and life skills before becoming fully immersed in digital devices.
The concept itself is immediately compelling. The idea of creating a list of meaningful experiences and responsibilities before receiving a phone transforms what could have been a restrictive rule into something adventurous, motivational, and growth-oriented. It shifts the focus away from punishment or limitation and toward preparation, maturity, and shared family experiences.
What stands out most is the emphasis on core childhood experiences that many families feel are slowly disappearing. The challenges encourage curiosity, independence, resilience, creativity, and practical problem-solving in ways that feel refreshing and grounded. Learning to cook, navigate without GPS, earn money through effort, write thoughtful thank-you notes, and engage with the world directly all reinforce valuable life skills that extend far beyond childhood.
Another major strength of the book is its accessibility. The writing style is conversational, humorous, and encouraging, making the ideas feel achievable rather than overwhelming. Ferguson avoids sounding preachy or overly rigid, which allows the book to resonate with parents who may themselves be struggling to balance technology with healthier developmental experiences for their children.
The emotional core of the book is equally powerful. Beneath the practical activities is a larger message about connection, memory-making, and intentional parenting. The book recognizes that childhood is shaped not only by convenience and entertainment, but also by challenge, exploration, boredom, responsibility, and shared moments between parents and children.
The structure of the checklist format also works extremely well because it transforms the reading experience into an interactive family project rather than passive advice. Parents and children can approach the book together, creating opportunities for bonding while building confidence and independence along the way.
At its core, The Things You Have to Do Before I Buy You a Phone is not really about delaying technology, it’s about preserving experiences that help children become resilient, capable, curious, and connected human beings before the digital world fully takes over their attention. It is a timely, engaging, and meaningful parenting guide with strong appeal for modern families searching for healthier ways to navigate childhood in the age of screens.
September 21, 2025
The Things You Have to Do Before I Buy You a Phone by Adam Ferguson is the ultimate stocking stuffer for your preteen this Christmas.
They might scowl at you and toss the book on top of their obligatory packages of Christmas socks, but trust me, it’s worth it.
The Things You Have to Do Before I Buy You a Phone provides an illustrated checklist of 50 skills and experiences your child would benefit from having as they move toward adulthood—things like:
• Clean the bathroom.
• Build a fire.
• Approach someone you don’t know well.
• Come to work with me for a day.
• Volunteer your time for the community.
And my personal favorite:
• Save enough money to buy the phone yourself.
It’s a quick read at only 116 pages yet provides a thorough description of each of the 50 tasks.
As Ferguson says, he “is just a dad trying to fix a problem in the world,” the problem of too many real life experiences being replaced by virtual ones, resulting in the loss of important personal values, like perseverance, courage, and imagination. What I love is that many of these tasks are meant to be done together, making them a beautiful way to create lifelong memories with your child.
My son has already taken a peek at the list and started complaining, but that is only to be expected. Some of the items don’t fit our particular life situation, so I appreciate that the author also provides ideas for how certain items can be adapted. One place we disagree—Ferguson suggests that kids reach the age of 14 before getting their first phones. I might extend that as far as 16.
I read this book fresh on the heels of The Anxious Generation by Jonathan Haidt. If you’re looking for a way to apply Haidt’s principles for extending a play-based and independent childhood, this is your handbook. Give it a try. Have fun. Grow together.
They might scowl at you and toss the book on top of their obligatory packages of Christmas socks, but trust me, it’s worth it.
The Things You Have to Do Before I Buy You a Phone provides an illustrated checklist of 50 skills and experiences your child would benefit from having as they move toward adulthood—things like:
• Clean the bathroom.
• Build a fire.
• Approach someone you don’t know well.
• Come to work with me for a day.
• Volunteer your time for the community.
And my personal favorite:
• Save enough money to buy the phone yourself.
It’s a quick read at only 116 pages yet provides a thorough description of each of the 50 tasks.
As Ferguson says, he “is just a dad trying to fix a problem in the world,” the problem of too many real life experiences being replaced by virtual ones, resulting in the loss of important personal values, like perseverance, courage, and imagination. What I love is that many of these tasks are meant to be done together, making them a beautiful way to create lifelong memories with your child.
My son has already taken a peek at the list and started complaining, but that is only to be expected. Some of the items don’t fit our particular life situation, so I appreciate that the author also provides ideas for how certain items can be adapted. One place we disagree—Ferguson suggests that kids reach the age of 14 before getting their first phones. I might extend that as far as 16.
I read this book fresh on the heels of The Anxious Generation by Jonathan Haidt. If you’re looking for a way to apply Haidt’s principles for extending a play-based and independent childhood, this is your handbook. Give it a try. Have fun. Grow together.
Displaying 1 - 2 of 2 reviews