From internationally recognized relationship expert Laura Doyle, this updated and expanded edition of The Empowered Wife will help women revitalize their marriages—featuring real success stories and foolproof tips. When Laura Doyle was on the brink of divorce, she decided to talk to women who’d been happily married for more than a decade. Their advice stunned her. From it, she distilled woman-centric practices that ended her frustration and resentment, restoring the playfulness and passion in her own marriage. Doyle has shared her secrets with women around the globe, saving thousands of marriages with her fresh, revolutionary approach and Six Intimacy Skills. Practical and counterintuitive, her newly updated Connection Framework is about focusing on your own desires and transforming your own life—not bending over backward to change your husband. Incorporating these skills will empower you Attract his attention like a magnet when you relax more and do less Get back to your bliss when he seems distant Receive affection not because you told him to make more of an effort, but because he naturally seeks you out Feel more like yourself—and like yourself more If you’ve been trying to “fix” your relationship and it’s not working, maybe the problem was never you or your husband—or even the two of you as a couple. Maybe the problem is that nobody ever taught you the skills you need to foster respect, tenderness, and consideration. With humor and heart, The Empowered Wife, Updated and Expanded Edition will show you how to improve your relationship in ways you hadn’t thought possible. You’ll join a worldwide community of hundreds of thousands of empowered wives who finally have the marriages they dreamed of when they said “I do.”
Laura Doyle is Professor of English at UMass Amherst, where she arrived in 1995 after seven years as Assistant Professor at Harvard University. She holds a BA from Beloit College, an MA from the University of Illinois, and a PhD from Brandeis University.
The Good: Overall really helpful and insightful advice. Her first chapter on ‘self care’ was a little hard to swallow coming from the community I’m in, however when it came down to it what she was actually saying was DON’T COMPLAIN! Which is great advice. Her real push was be responsible for your own happiness, not in a ‘clear the way it’s me time’ (which was hinted at but NOT the emphasis) but to be the kind of person who is responsible for themselves. I actually found this section really really helpful. The rest of her points revolve around respecting your husband, and being grateful. Her insights are on point. Stop treating your husband like a child, don’t be controlling, trust him, thank him for anything good he does. And if you don’t think you fall into any of these ditches read what she has to say about you managing your husband’s driving and you will instantly know what you need to work on next. 😅 Biggest take away: Stay on your own page. Would recommend and will be implementing some of this in my own marriage. Also found a lot of what she said helpful and thought provoking on the side of (for me) raising boys. Knowing on one hand, I am their mother, and on the other if this sounds disrespectful to my husband—it probably does to them too. So off topic, but very helpful.
Qualms: the title. The last 10 pages were marketing. One short chapter of advice that I just didn’t think was particularly good. As a Christian there are definitely some things I would word differently… the title… but I think if you are engaging with the reading you’re going to benefit and see the helpful and be able to weed out the less helpful.
2.5/3 ⭐️, read for book group. The best things in this book are the practical applications regarding respecting your husband (for example, don’t be the “helpful” ie controlling wife), don’t place the burden of your happiness on your husband’s shoulders, stay on your own page, practice gratitude frequently, etc. Some really great, practical, convicting advice on how to be an enjoyable wife! Nothing earth shattering or anything you couldn’t learn from a good pastor or a lovely older woman in your church, though.
Some of the practical advice was also quite selfish and unbiblical, such as whenever you don’t feel like doing something or you don’t think you’ll be able to do it cheerfully, simply tell your husband, “sorry, I can’t.” With no explanation.
Stumbled upon this book on Kindle and it ended up being a pretty quick read. Every woman should read this book. Really interesting material and different than a lot of the conventional relationship advice floating around. Does feel a little sensationalist and like she’s trying to sell her coaching program, but I enjoyed it other than that and would recommend.
The best self help book I have read in a long time. I will say it could hit different depends where a wife would be in her personal life but for me it was the exact thing I needed! So good.