Invitation to Tears: A Guide to Grieving Well

by Jonalyn Fincher, Aubrie Hills, Dale Fincher (Foreword)

Grief can come in many forms and for many reasons. But grief of any kind forces us to ask the questions "What do I do next?" and "How will I go on?" Unfortunately, as we ache for our lives to be the way they once were, we are too often given pat answers, unhelpful advice, and step-by-step processes that leave us feeling like unsuccessful grievers. Jonalyn Fincher and Aubrie Hills use their own personal experiences of grief, as well as stories from others, to explore a healthy vocabulary of grief. By looking at the way Scripture approaches mourning, and even the example set by Jesus, we discover how grief brings healing and life. In these pages you will find opportunities to engage with your own rolling waves of grief and recognize the importance of grieving well.

Genres: Grief

88 pages, Paperback

First published April 28, 2014

Reviews

[Selah Margaret]

Really worth reading, especially when you're grieving.

[Brenda · Rating 5 out of 5]

As a supporter of Soulation, I was excited to get an advance copy of Jonalyn Fincher’s latest book, Invitation to Tears: A Guide to Grieving Well. Written with thanatologist Aubrie Hills, with a foreword by Dale Fincher, Invitation to Tears uses the framing metaphor of a ship at sea to explore the journey of grief. Each chapter ends with music and movie recommendations to help you along, followed by questions for discussion and/or journaling. Although the authors refer to death, their advice is applicable to any sort of life-changing loss, not only the physical death of a loved one. Along with honest stories about their own personal losses, they discuss how Jesus dealt with grief, and consider Bible verses that are often misapplied in times of personal distress. Invitation to Tears is free of platitudes, instead exhorting the reader that the only healthy way out of grief is through it, and that God can handle your questions and messy feelings.

While my closest friends and family are all (thankfully) alive and well, as a divorced person, I’ve grieved the loss of my marriage. I believe a divorce is worse than a death in some ways, and in the beginning, it was horrible to sit with and work through my feelings instead of ignoring them or self-medicating. But I was determined to grieve well and come out the other side a whole and healthy person. In that sense, Invitation to Tears was very validating and encouraging to me. I nodded along to Jonalyn’s and Aubrie’s words, and many of them are actually things I’ve said myself. I loved their assurances that grief is NOT a logical or linear experience, and not only do we all grieve differently, but we also grieve specific losses differently. Grief is an opportunity to be brave even as we fall apart, to confront our fears and our humanness while applying lots of grace to ourselves and others.

Invitation to Tears is a great resource and comfort for anyone facing the death of a loved one, marriage, child, career, or long-held dream. It would also be a wonderful study for a support group.If this topic interests you, I recommend checking it out!

[Doug · Rating 3 out of 5]

If I were to describe “Invitation to Tears” in a word, it would be “permission”—permission to grieve. The authors are sensitive to the various ways people grieve. They also recognize that the death of a loved one is not the only loss over which we may grieve.

My impression is that the book is written for the person who is grieving. It is divided into short, easy to read chapters. In each, Jonalyn and Aubrie attempt to express some of the emotions and experiences in the grief process, giving a few thoughtful tips along the way. On the downside, at times I had difficulty understanding the point the authors were attempting to make in a given section due to the brevity. Read more...

[Carissa Beard · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is the kind of book that everyone should read, because at some point we will all experience loss and how we grieve will affect us forever. Such a great resource book for anyone who wants to love hurting people,including oneself.