It Must Have Been Moonglow: Reflections on the First Years of Widowhood

by Phyllis Greene

In December 1998, after fifty-six years of marriage, Phyllis Greene went from being part of the lifelong unit of PhyllisandBob to being just plain Phyllis. As a way of coping with her feelings, she began keeping a journal. She realized her own reflections could speak to the thousands of women like her, each one with very different yet in some ways very similar day-to-day experiences. It Must Have Been Moonglow chronicles the emotional roller-coaster of her experience in a collection of brief essays—like diary entries—that capture the sadness, the humor, and the triumphs all widows encounter. She writes with wit and insight about negotiating the logistics of an evening out with a group of single older women, none of whom drive very well; about handling the check when going to dinner with a couple; about grocery shopping for one; and about the miracle of friendships on the Internet and the blessings of family.

With a new final section featuring readers’ letters describing their own experiences of widowhood, It Must Have Been Moonglow is an intimate, candid, and engaging book—not about grief but about inspiration and strength.

192 pages, Paperback

First published January 1, 2001

Reviews

[Luann Habecker · Rating 4 out of 5]

delightful read. enjoy her wit. effortless writing style . think the line "what this widow does" on pg 89 would've made a swell title

pg 19 We all may look the same in the eyes of the Lord, but in the temporal world, a widow does not look life a wife.

pg 32 one member who tended to get carried away by the sound of her own voice

pg 40 it seems that what matters more is the look you have on your face, not the clothes you have on your back

pg 44 i want to call the credit card companies asap, but the number to reach them to report a stolen card is on the back of the card itself!

pg 51 We all need to be careful shoppers, but this looked like more than "care" to me, and i thought of the choices she had made to set her priorities.

pg 61 too many things go wrong-not be things, just the daily screwups.

pg 86

pg 89 Am i killing time or using my mind...

pg 95 hours: one and then another, and you get through the one and then, my God, there's another. / an hour here or there when our lives seem, against all odds and expectations, to burst open and give us everything we've ever imagined...

pg 97 that all religion leads to the same place of grace [??]

pg 99 rare moments when my life seems to burst open and give me everything

pg 104 the 100 page test (if you don't like it by then, you have permission not to finish)
We never "flame" another reader for choices of books or critiques.

pg 111 One potato in the grocery cart. The perfect symbol of widowhood.
The diminishing of a woman, the running down of a life.

pg 113

pg 142 Now, you don't so much abandon hope as comfort, dignity, and any sense of control.

[Karen · Rating 4 out of 5]

I valued this read and the insights the author gave me on an approach to widowhood. It's been a long while since I read it, so my memory is foggy. But I'm thinking about gifting a copy to a friend who was widowed in recent years.

[Scolumbus · Rating 4 out of 5]

Easy, quick read with real life stories of one woman's experience with widowhood after a long, happy marriage. The edition I read had letters from readers to the author at the end of the book. It was interesting to see how wide a range of people she effected despite it seeming to be a book geared for a specific population. I think you can learn from others' experiences, even if they have very different lives, and this book may help you understand the widow's perspective and enable you to be a better support to a widow as well as getting support if you have been widowed.

[Britt · Rating 2 out of 5]

This is a sociology book I read while taking Aging and the Family. It helps to describe widowhood and all that is involved with the process of healing. Very quick read and it makes you appreciate the elders in your family way before they die. I liked it because it made me think of all that have past and how to help those who have gone through the lose of a loved one.

[Sue · Rating 5 out of 5]

Made me think about a time I don't like to address and made me thankful for my man too and that he is still here.

[Mary · Rating 3 out of 5]

The journal of Phyllis Greene who becomes a widow and reflects on the emotional roller coaster she experiences after fifty fix years of marriage