What do you think?
Rate this book
Otherwise, I'm Fine: A Memoir
A daughter's story of unresolved grief and a family's hard-won healing
When her husband Bill died in 1969, Tina Presnell gathered her three children. "We won't talk about this," she said. "It will be easier that way." Thus began, in the Presnell family, a decades-long period of silence and intense, isolated grieving for this ordinary man.
In 2012, several years after her mother's death, Barbara Presnell recovered her father's World War II a scrapbook, news clippings, documents, and letters. Recalling how much his war experiences had meant to him, Barbara, along with her estranged brother and sister, planned a journey to travel their father's route through Europe. From Omaha Beach in Normandy, France, to the western bank of the Elbe River in Magdeburg, Germany, the siblings would follow the movements of their father's division and rediscover his stories, share memories, and renew family bonds.
In Otherwise, I'm Fine, Presnell tells the story of her grief and, across her tour of western Europe, the breakthroughs that released her from recurring depression, resolved her conflicted grief for her mother, and returned her beloved father to her and her siblings as a living memory.
When her husband Bill died in 1969, Tina Presnell gathered her three children. "We won't talk about this," she said. "It will be easier that way." Thus began, in the Presnell family, a decades-long period of silence and intense, isolated grieving for this ordinary man.
In 2012, several years after her mother's death, Barbara Presnell recovered her father's World War II a scrapbook, news clippings, documents, and letters. Recalling how much his war experiences had meant to him, Barbara, along with her estranged brother and sister, planned a journey to travel their father's route through Europe. From Omaha Beach in Normandy, France, to the western bank of the Elbe River in Magdeburg, Germany, the siblings would follow the movements of their father's division and rediscover his stories, share memories, and renew family bonds.
In Otherwise, I'm Fine, Presnell tells the story of her grief and, across her tour of western Europe, the breakthroughs that released her from recurring depression, resolved her conflicted grief for her mother, and returned her beloved father to her and her siblings as a living memory.
261 pages, Kindle Edition
Published April 22, 2025
7 people are currently reading
331 people want to read
Ratings & Reviews
Friends & Following
Create a free account to discover what your friends think of this book!
Community Reviews
Displaying 1 - 9 of 9 reviews
June 18, 2025
This memoir is a journey on three levels, beautifully woven, of family loss and the recovery that happens only when you really make the effort to reconnect with adult siblings and further explore your parents, now gone. I read this aloud with my husband over a trip to Tennessee and back, and in installments, a chapter a night, until we were done. At times, he held my hand, as it made us think of our own losses -- his mother died when he was a boy; my first husband died when my children were only 12 and 8. I felt exhilarated at the end, like I'd cracked through and left a damaged snakeskin behind, for new growth. It also sent me into exploring my own piles of letters and journals, and family memorabilia, to keep, toss, and move on. This is how reading memoirs should make you feel and take action!
January 10, 2026
Otherwise, I’m Fine is a quietly devastating and ultimately restorative memoir that examines how unresolved grief can shape a family for generations and how courage, memory, and shared reckoning can begin to heal what silence has broken.
Barbara Presnell’s story begins with a single sentence spoken in the wake of her father’s death: “We won’t talk about this. It will be easier that way.” That decision, made in 1969, reverberates across decades. Presnell captures with striking clarity the emotional consequences of suppressed mourning isolated grief, recurring depression, fractured sibling relationships, and a sense of loss that never quite takes form because it was never allowed language.
The memoir’s emotional turning point arrives with the rediscovery of her father’s World War II scrapbook. What follows is both a literal and emotional journey, as Presnell and her estranged siblings trace their father’s wartime path across Europe. This pilgrimage becomes an act of reclamation not just of their father’s story, but of their shared humanity as a family that had been divided by unspoken pain.
Presnell writes with restraint and honesty, allowing moments of insight to surface organically rather than forcing resolution. Her reflections on grief particularly conflicted grief toward a parent who enforced silence are nuanced, compassionate, and deeply relatable. The memoir never rushes healing; instead, it honors how long and uneven that process can be.
Otherwise, I’m Fine is a profound meditation on memory, loss, and the cost of emotional avoidance. It will resonate deeply with readers navigating bereavement, family estrangement, depression, or the long aftermath of silence and offers quiet hope that even delayed healing is still possible.
Barbara Presnell’s story begins with a single sentence spoken in the wake of her father’s death: “We won’t talk about this. It will be easier that way.” That decision, made in 1969, reverberates across decades. Presnell captures with striking clarity the emotional consequences of suppressed mourning isolated grief, recurring depression, fractured sibling relationships, and a sense of loss that never quite takes form because it was never allowed language.
The memoir’s emotional turning point arrives with the rediscovery of her father’s World War II scrapbook. What follows is both a literal and emotional journey, as Presnell and her estranged siblings trace their father’s wartime path across Europe. This pilgrimage becomes an act of reclamation not just of their father’s story, but of their shared humanity as a family that had been divided by unspoken pain.
Presnell writes with restraint and honesty, allowing moments of insight to surface organically rather than forcing resolution. Her reflections on grief particularly conflicted grief toward a parent who enforced silence are nuanced, compassionate, and deeply relatable. The memoir never rushes healing; instead, it honors how long and uneven that process can be.
Otherwise, I’m Fine is a profound meditation on memory, loss, and the cost of emotional avoidance. It will resonate deeply with readers navigating bereavement, family estrangement, depression, or the long aftermath of silence and offers quiet hope that even delayed healing is still possible.
December 31, 2025
Otherwise, I’m Fine is a quietly devastating and deeply restorative memoir about what happens when grief is postponed rather than processed. Barbara Presnell writes with restraint and emotional precision, allowing silence, memory, and discovery to carry equal weight throughout the narrative.
What makes this memoir exceptional is its structure. The journey across Europe following her father’s World War II path becomes both a physical pilgrimage and an emotional excavation. The recovered scrapbook, letters, and photographs feel like doors opening one by one, returning a father long buried under family silence and unresolved loss.
Presnell’s exploration of generational grief, sibling estrangement, and the courage required to revisit painful truths is honest and humane. This is not a story of dramatic confrontation, but of gradual release. A powerful book for readers drawn to memoirs about family, war memory, depression, and the long road toward healing.
What makes this memoir exceptional is its structure. The journey across Europe following her father’s World War II path becomes both a physical pilgrimage and an emotional excavation. The recovered scrapbook, letters, and photographs feel like doors opening one by one, returning a father long buried under family silence and unresolved loss.
Presnell’s exploration of generational grief, sibling estrangement, and the courage required to revisit painful truths is honest and humane. This is not a story of dramatic confrontation, but of gradual release. A powerful book for readers drawn to memoirs about family, war memory, depression, and the long road toward healing.
July 16, 2025
In this memoir, Barbara shares her struggles with grief and family relationships in an up-close and personal style. Her descriptive writing let's you take the journey of healing along side of her.
My bookclub selected Otherwise, I'm Fine for our June read. We had the honor of having the author, Barbara Presnell, attend our monthly meeting. Each of the bookclub members were touched by different aspects of the story, the longing experienced in losing a parent at a young age, the search for connectedness with family members, the aligning of the universe (or spiritual intervention) to allow Barabara and her family to connect with so many people in France that gave her greater insight into her father's trek across the country in WWII, the courage it took to write this story. It was an extensive discussion, a great bookclub meeting!
A good read as an individual or for a book club.
My bookclub selected Otherwise, I'm Fine for our June read. We had the honor of having the author, Barbara Presnell, attend our monthly meeting. Each of the bookclub members were touched by different aspects of the story, the longing experienced in losing a parent at a young age, the search for connectedness with family members, the aligning of the universe (or spiritual intervention) to allow Barabara and her family to connect with so many people in France that gave her greater insight into her father's trek across the country in WWII, the courage it took to write this story. It was an extensive discussion, a great bookclub meeting!
A good read as an individual or for a book club.
January 12, 2026
Otherwise, I’m Fine is one of the best books I’ve read in a long time. Beautifully written and deeply honest, it shows how unresolved grief after the loss of a father ripples through a family—between a mother and her children and among siblings—for years. Presnell’s journey retracing her father’s WWII footsteps with her siblings blends memoir and military history into a powerful story of understanding and healing. Heartbreaking yet hopeful, this book reveals what happens when grief goes unaddressed—and how truth and compassion can restore what was broken. Highly recommend.
March 14, 2026
After finding her deceased father’s journal, his daughter and her sibs follow the trail of their father through Europe during WW II. The trip is a healing process for them as they find people who remember their father and tell them of their encounters with their dad. Following his death when they were young, their mother never allowed them to speak of him again. This journey shows them who their father really was.
May 19, 2025
Barbara Presnell used her skills as a writer, journalist and English teacher to craft an exceptional read! She took me on an amazing journey of reconciliation and growth across Europe and the American South of her youth. I highly recommend this book as an entertaining read, but also an education on the 2nd World War in Europe.
May 19, 2025
Filled with heart and hope.
This memoir grabbed me from the first words describing the death of the author’s father happening twice. I wasn’t disappointed as I read of the teenager facing the loss of a father and the journey she and her siblings took retracing his steps from France to Germany during the end of WW II. Beautiful writing that sometimes brought me to tears.
This memoir grabbed me from the first words describing the death of the author’s father happening twice. I wasn’t disappointed as I read of the teenager facing the loss of a father and the journey she and her siblings took retracing his steps from France to Germany during the end of WW II. Beautiful writing that sometimes brought me to tears.
July 8, 2025
Wonderful book!
Displaying 1 - 9 of 9 reviews