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Still Life
In the summer of 2006 Med student Darren Huang meets Taishini refugee Timur Gan.
A series of devastating events conspire to bring them together in what is a passionate, whirlwind romance - doomed to end come September. Its echoes, though, and the consequences, will have long lasting effects in the lives of the two young men.
Ten years later, an unexpected encounter on a crowded square offers them a second chance, but are they brave enough to take it? And will the choices they now make change the outcome of their fate?
A series of devastating events conspire to bring them together in what is a passionate, whirlwind romance - doomed to end come September. Its echoes, though, and the consequences, will have long lasting effects in the lives of the two young men.
Ten years later, an unexpected encounter on a crowded square offers them a second chance, but are they brave enough to take it? And will the choices they now make change the outcome of their fate?
290 pages, Paperback
Published October 13, 2022
About the author
Ruth Miranda
34 books82 followers"As soon as I learned my ABC I was writing stories."
Ruth Miranda is a Portugal born and raised author who feels more comfortable around words than people, especially if those words happen to be in English, a language she once taught for a living - amongst other varied jobs. She started making up stories in her head as a child, to put herself to sleep, but the stories kept growing with her, so eventually, they needed to be put to paper. Her published work includes The Preternatural Series and Blood Trilogy, as well as the romance novel Danseur and the Byanamese Romance series. You can find her being social on Instagram under the handle @ruth__miranda, where she shares snippets of upcoming and published work, and on her Patreon, where she posts thoughts on writing, deleted scenes, and an online novel. Find it here https://www.patreon.com/RuthMiranda
Ruth Miranda is a Portugal born and raised author who feels more comfortable around words than people, especially if those words happen to be in English, a language she once taught for a living - amongst other varied jobs. She started making up stories in her head as a child, to put herself to sleep, but the stories kept growing with her, so eventually, they needed to be put to paper. Her published work includes The Preternatural Series and Blood Trilogy, as well as the romance novel Danseur and the Byanamese Romance series. You can find her being social on Instagram under the handle @ruth__miranda, where she shares snippets of upcoming and published work, and on her Patreon, where she posts thoughts on writing, deleted scenes, and an online novel. Find it here https://www.patreon.com/RuthMiranda
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Displaying 1 - 9 of 9 reviews
June 28, 2025
Reminiscent of the great tragic romances, Still Life is a devastating portrayal of two people who deserve a life of love together, if only the world would let them be happy, and if only they could stop getting in their own way. Told over two timelines, Still Life is something of a subversion of a classic second-chance romance, exploring how - even after ten years, and despite the best of intentions - little can be done to change one's own inherent nature.
Mired in self-loathing, Darren finds himself irresistibly drawn to Timur, but is adamant he is not the kind of man who could permit such feelings. Darren is a deeply complex narrator whose adamant claims often vastly differ from his actions, so I hesitate to put his struggles in a single box and label it something like 'internalised homophobia'. Indeed, Darren himself furiously resists labels, and my interpretation of Still Life is that this is a novel that encourages nuanced reflection and demands readers to see its characters as wholly human and utterly flawed, with no simple answers.
With Timur's traumatic history; the losses he undergoes; and the extreme stress he endures in the 2006 timeline, Still Life also explores a trauma bonded couple who offer each other so much, yet whose histories (Timur) and insecurities/negative self-perceptions (Darren) mean they catapult into co-dependency. Here, too, my interpretation of the novel is that it begs readers to consider the human frailties of its characters, not to attempt to constrict them as Darren often finds himself being by the other characters around him. If Dostoevsky wrote a contemporary Romance, it might look something like Still Life, and the pit in my stomach tells me this is a Very Good Thing.
Between gorgeous scenes blending sweet romance with utter want, and moments where the characters are subsumed by grief and inner chaos, Ruth Miranda depicts the desperation of two people lost at sea, clinging to the life rafts of one another's hearts.
Still Life will leave you with the kind of empty ache of all the best 'if only' stories, full of regret for missed opportunities, and a kind of aching sadness reflecting on the complexity of trying to change, but finding yourself running around in circles. There are few contemporary characters like Darren, but I think his voice and his story is important, because it reflects something of the genuine tragedy of the human experience.
I am grateful to the author for providing an ARC of Still Life. These opinions are my own.
Mired in self-loathing, Darren finds himself irresistibly drawn to Timur, but is adamant he is not the kind of man who could permit such feelings. Darren is a deeply complex narrator whose adamant claims often vastly differ from his actions, so I hesitate to put his struggles in a single box and label it something like 'internalised homophobia'. Indeed, Darren himself furiously resists labels, and my interpretation of Still Life is that this is a novel that encourages nuanced reflection and demands readers to see its characters as wholly human and utterly flawed, with no simple answers.
With Timur's traumatic history; the losses he undergoes; and the extreme stress he endures in the 2006 timeline, Still Life also explores a trauma bonded couple who offer each other so much, yet whose histories (Timur) and insecurities/negative self-perceptions (Darren) mean they catapult into co-dependency. Here, too, my interpretation of the novel is that it begs readers to consider the human frailties of its characters, not to attempt to constrict them as Darren often finds himself being by the other characters around him. If Dostoevsky wrote a contemporary Romance, it might look something like Still Life, and the pit in my stomach tells me this is a Very Good Thing.
Between gorgeous scenes blending sweet romance with utter want, and moments where the characters are subsumed by grief and inner chaos, Ruth Miranda depicts the desperation of two people lost at sea, clinging to the life rafts of one another's hearts.
Still Life will leave you with the kind of empty ache of all the best 'if only' stories, full of regret for missed opportunities, and a kind of aching sadness reflecting on the complexity of trying to change, but finding yourself running around in circles. There are few contemporary characters like Darren, but I think his voice and his story is important, because it reflects something of the genuine tragedy of the human experience.
I am grateful to the author for providing an ARC of Still Life. These opinions are my own.
July 5, 2022
Warning: Contains spoilers
If there’s one thing I love the most about Ruth’s books, is how realistic they can be. The characters are not perfect, and have realistic issues that do not always have a happy result. How they interact with one another is not always full of love or understanding. And with Still Life, you’re not always left with happiness or completion, but it makes you wanting more.
In Still Life, we’re met with two main characters, Darren and Timur. Darren seems to be the stronger narrative for most of the story—a man in his early thirties who does not fully accept who he is, despite everyone around him waiting for him to. Most of the story occurs ten years ago, when both Darren and Timur are in their early twenties, the beginnings of their relationship filled with turmoil, dependency, and toxic behaviors.
This is where I really have an appreciation for the way Ruth approaches her characters. Darren, to me, is manipulative and seems to focus on his problems more so than Timur’s. It’s not to say that he doesn’t care for Timur, but he is the kind of character who throws a fit if something doesn’t go according to his plan. Basically, what he’s thinking, doesn’t always happen in reality. This also showed a more vulnerable side to Darren, in a way. That while he believes that his family and friends will look at him a certain way because of his affects for Darren, that he has no other option but to behave the way he does. He can be a caring person, especially to those he loves, but in the same turn, he also doesn’t give himself the time he needs to figure everything out. He puts it on others, especially Timur.
Timur, having lost his loved ones, is in a vulnerable state when he first meets Darren. Those wounds are fresh, and his emotions almost seem to be stuck whenever he is with Darren. And after the two of them don’t see each other for ten years, those wounds open back up, that dependency that Darren ‘forced’ him into is there.
I wouldn’t say their story has much of a happy ending, but I wouldn’t necessarily say it’s a ‘bad’ ending. In the end, I feel as though it’s more of a shock, if not to the reader, then to the main characters themselves. For Timur, I almost feel like he has some semblance of peace, like he’s free from all burdens and at the same time could see Darren in a brighter light. He’s holding onto everything that is good in Darren. And for Darren? It almost feels like everything came crashing down.
Still Life had me going through the motions, feeling every aspect of the characters and how life can really just punch you in the gut when all you want to do is move forward. Nevertheless, I throughly enjoyed reading Still Life, and I hope to read more of Ruth’s books in the future.
These are my honest thoughts about Still Life, and I am thankful to the author for providing an ARC copy. 10/10 would recommend, and read again.
CW: homophobia, mentions of chronic illness, death, prostitution, needles, drug abuse, suicide ideation, near suicide attempt, self-harm, blood, sex.
If there’s one thing I love the most about Ruth’s books, is how realistic they can be. The characters are not perfect, and have realistic issues that do not always have a happy result. How they interact with one another is not always full of love or understanding. And with Still Life, you’re not always left with happiness or completion, but it makes you wanting more.
In Still Life, we’re met with two main characters, Darren and Timur. Darren seems to be the stronger narrative for most of the story—a man in his early thirties who does not fully accept who he is, despite everyone around him waiting for him to. Most of the story occurs ten years ago, when both Darren and Timur are in their early twenties, the beginnings of their relationship filled with turmoil, dependency, and toxic behaviors.
This is where I really have an appreciation for the way Ruth approaches her characters. Darren, to me, is manipulative and seems to focus on his problems more so than Timur’s. It’s not to say that he doesn’t care for Timur, but he is the kind of character who throws a fit if something doesn’t go according to his plan. Basically, what he’s thinking, doesn’t always happen in reality. This also showed a more vulnerable side to Darren, in a way. That while he believes that his family and friends will look at him a certain way because of his affects for Darren, that he has no other option but to behave the way he does. He can be a caring person, especially to those he loves, but in the same turn, he also doesn’t give himself the time he needs to figure everything out. He puts it on others, especially Timur.
Timur, having lost his loved ones, is in a vulnerable state when he first meets Darren. Those wounds are fresh, and his emotions almost seem to be stuck whenever he is with Darren. And after the two of them don’t see each other for ten years, those wounds open back up, that dependency that Darren ‘forced’ him into is there.
I wouldn’t say their story has much of a happy ending, but I wouldn’t necessarily say it’s a ‘bad’ ending. In the end, I feel as though it’s more of a shock, if not to the reader, then to the main characters themselves. For Timur, I almost feel like he has some semblance of peace, like he’s free from all burdens and at the same time could see Darren in a brighter light. He’s holding onto everything that is good in Darren. And for Darren? It almost feels like everything came crashing down.
Still Life had me going through the motions, feeling every aspect of the characters and how life can really just punch you in the gut when all you want to do is move forward. Nevertheless, I throughly enjoyed reading Still Life, and I hope to read more of Ruth’s books in the future.
These are my honest thoughts about Still Life, and I am thankful to the author for providing an ARC copy. 10/10 would recommend, and read again.
CW: homophobia, mentions of chronic illness, death, prostitution, needles, drug abuse, suicide ideation, near suicide attempt, self-harm, blood, sex.
June 24, 2022
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
Do not read this if you are faint of heart 💔
“𝐒𝐨𝐦𝐞𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐢𝐧𝐬𝐢𝐝𝐞 𝐦𝐞 𝐝𝐢𝐞𝐬, 𝐢𝐫𝐫𝐞𝐭𝐫𝐢𝐞𝐯𝐚𝐛𝐥𝐲 𝐥𝐨𝐬𝐭, 𝐬𝐨𝐦𝐞𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐈 𝐟𝐚𝐢𝐥 𝐭𝐨 𝐢𝐝𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐢𝐟𝐲 𝐨𝐫 𝐮𝐧𝐝𝐞𝐫𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐧𝐝. 𝐖𝐡𝐚𝐭𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐫 𝐢𝐭 𝐰𝐚𝐬, 𝐈 𝐝𝐨𝐧’𝐭 𝐰𝐚𝐧𝐭 𝐢𝐭 𝐛𝐚𝐜𝐤.”
This is a dual POV story, written over two time-lines, following Darren and Timur's relationship.
Ruth Miranda doesn't pull her punches and she doesn't shy away from difficult, or painful subjects.
She writes the whole spectrum of emotion so incredibly well. Relationships are intense, passionate, and relatable.
“[…]𝐜𝐨𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐞𝐝 𝐦𝐲 𝐛𝐨𝐝𝐲 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐧𝐨𝐰 𝐜𝐨𝐯𝐞𝐫 𝐡𝐢𝐬, 𝐥𝐢𝐤𝐞 𝐬𝐨𝐦𝐞 𝐬𝐨𝐫𝐭 𝐨𝐟 𝐭𝐰𝐢𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐝 𝐢𝐧𝐭𝐢𝐦𝐚𝐜𝐲 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐩𝐫𝐨𝐦𝐢𝐬𝐞𝐬 𝐡𝐞𝐚𝐯𝐞𝐧 𝐛𝐮𝐭 𝐩𝐮𝐭𝐬 𝐦𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐫𝐨𝐮𝐠𝐡 𝐡𝐞𝐥𝐥.”
Sometimes in a romance, the MC doesn't have any notable flaws, or they're only minor flaws. Miranda isn't scared of depicting a deeply flawed character, that is also compelling. She pushes the boundaries and finds that perfect balance, giving the character just enough redeemable qualities so that you're still rooting for them.
And here is the perfect example of how someone can appear successful and confident on the outside, but just below the surface they're floundering, and barely holding it together. Despite such bad behaviour, I still found myself connecting with him.
Indeed, at times I was so pissed off 🤬 but it didn't stop me wanting the best for him. The way you would for a loved one in real life even if they'd done something awful. That's how brilliantly Miranda writes.
The prose is imbued with a lush lyricism which adds to its deeply evocative qualities.
Even the supporting cast, are multidimensional characters. And we could all do with a GiGi in our lives 🤗🥰
Once I'd finished it, I couldn't help but go over things in my mind, re-examining scenes, and breaking my heart all over again 💔
A great story can rock you. And. I. Am. Rocked!
⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐
I was lucky enough to receive an eARC in return for an honest review.
Do not read this if you are faint of heart 💔
“𝐒𝐨𝐦𝐞𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐢𝐧𝐬𝐢𝐝𝐞 𝐦𝐞 𝐝𝐢𝐞𝐬, 𝐢𝐫𝐫𝐞𝐭𝐫𝐢𝐞𝐯𝐚𝐛𝐥𝐲 𝐥𝐨𝐬𝐭, 𝐬𝐨𝐦𝐞𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐈 𝐟𝐚𝐢𝐥 𝐭𝐨 𝐢𝐝𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐢𝐟𝐲 𝐨𝐫 𝐮𝐧𝐝𝐞𝐫𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐧𝐝. 𝐖𝐡𝐚𝐭𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐫 𝐢𝐭 𝐰𝐚𝐬, 𝐈 𝐝𝐨𝐧’𝐭 𝐰𝐚𝐧𝐭 𝐢𝐭 𝐛𝐚𝐜𝐤.”
This is a dual POV story, written over two time-lines, following Darren and Timur's relationship.
Ruth Miranda doesn't pull her punches and she doesn't shy away from difficult, or painful subjects.
She writes the whole spectrum of emotion so incredibly well. Relationships are intense, passionate, and relatable.
“[…]𝐜𝐨𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐞𝐝 𝐦𝐲 𝐛𝐨𝐝𝐲 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐧𝐨𝐰 𝐜𝐨𝐯𝐞𝐫 𝐡𝐢𝐬, 𝐥𝐢𝐤𝐞 𝐬𝐨𝐦𝐞 𝐬𝐨𝐫𝐭 𝐨𝐟 𝐭𝐰𝐢𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐝 𝐢𝐧𝐭𝐢𝐦𝐚𝐜𝐲 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐩𝐫𝐨𝐦𝐢𝐬𝐞𝐬 𝐡𝐞𝐚𝐯𝐞𝐧 𝐛𝐮𝐭 𝐩𝐮𝐭𝐬 𝐦𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐫𝐨𝐮𝐠𝐡 𝐡𝐞𝐥𝐥.”
Sometimes in a romance, the MC doesn't have any notable flaws, or they're only minor flaws. Miranda isn't scared of depicting a deeply flawed character, that is also compelling. She pushes the boundaries and finds that perfect balance, giving the character just enough redeemable qualities so that you're still rooting for them.
And here is the perfect example of how someone can appear successful and confident on the outside, but just below the surface they're floundering, and barely holding it together. Despite such bad behaviour, I still found myself connecting with him.
Indeed, at times I was so pissed off 🤬 but it didn't stop me wanting the best for him. The way you would for a loved one in real life even if they'd done something awful. That's how brilliantly Miranda writes.
The prose is imbued with a lush lyricism which adds to its deeply evocative qualities.
Even the supporting cast, are multidimensional characters. And we could all do with a GiGi in our lives 🤗🥰
Once I'd finished it, I couldn't help but go over things in my mind, re-examining scenes, and breaking my heart all over again 💔
A great story can rock you. And. I. Am. Rocked!
⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐
I was lucky enough to receive an eARC in return for an honest review.
May 21, 2022
"I'm here for you, you know that."
"You're not even here for yourself."
After reading Thirty Days With You, I'd been looking forward to come back to the fictional country of Byanbyan-Ma and learn more about Darren, who was a secondary character in the first book in the series.
Even though this book does indeed have some romantic (and very sexy) parts, it's not meant to be a standard romance novel; it's a story about self-acceptance, codependency, and two people who are at the same time perfect and absolutely terrible together.
Darren is not a hero; he brings fear of commitment to a whole new level, and he's so absorbed in his own self-descructive thoughts that he doesn't realize that, if he just lifted his head and looked around, he'd found all the acceptance and love he believes he could never get.
On the other hand, Timur is lovely; broken, tired, and blindly in love, to the point he lets Darren get away with everything. I wanted to give this boy a hug for the entire book.
When these two are together the pages are on fire, the kind of fire that has the potential to destroy everything... this book will keep you glued to it, wondering if and how this relationship can ever get back on the right track. And the ending will break your heart.
"You're not even here for yourself."
After reading Thirty Days With You, I'd been looking forward to come back to the fictional country of Byanbyan-Ma and learn more about Darren, who was a secondary character in the first book in the series.
Even though this book does indeed have some romantic (and very sexy) parts, it's not meant to be a standard romance novel; it's a story about self-acceptance, codependency, and two people who are at the same time perfect and absolutely terrible together.
Darren is not a hero; he brings fear of commitment to a whole new level, and he's so absorbed in his own self-descructive thoughts that he doesn't realize that, if he just lifted his head and looked around, he'd found all the acceptance and love he believes he could never get.
On the other hand, Timur is lovely; broken, tired, and blindly in love, to the point he lets Darren get away with everything. I wanted to give this boy a hug for the entire book.
When these two are together the pages are on fire, the kind of fire that has the potential to destroy everything... this book will keep you glued to it, wondering if and how this relationship can ever get back on the right track. And the ending will break your heart.
June 30, 2022
Every once in a while, you come across a book that reminds you that you only live once, for better or worse, and that the love of others for you should never be taken for granted. Ruth Miranda's "Still Life" is one of such books, as well as—I would dare say—a masterpiece within the genre of romantic tragedies. Don't be deceived by the cheerful shade of jade of its cover, or the simple appearance of its blurb: messy, complicated, and full of jagged edges, this book will make your heart bleed.
Little more than a side character in "Thirty Days With You", the book that started the Byanbyan-ma universe, Darren Huang becomes the main character in "Still Life". As a young Med student with a controlling girlfriend and a strict father, Darren isn't ready for the curveball life throws his way in the shape of Taishini refugees Timur and Lola Gan. Everything he thought he was, and wanted, comes crumbling down, and like a hurt animal, Darren kicks and thrashes to try to break free… Unsuccessfully. He loves Timur, and the truth of this is scary enough to make Darren run away. But then they run into each other ten years later, and unless Darren does something about it, the wounds of the past might destroy their present and future.
I've warned you before, and I'll warn you again: this story is going to break your heart. Ruth Miranda isn't a stranger to ugly pain and complicated characters, and the darkness she loves exploring in her works shows in every line. This isn't a tale about love; it's a tale about the ways in which we choose to reject it, and the ways it can be weaponised when we're scared and we don't have anything else with which to defend ourselves. Before the world can hurt him for loving Timur, Darren decides to hurt him to keep him away, and stay safe. Why? Because, despite having been born and raised in the open-minded, accepting country of Byanbyan-ma, Darren is terrified of how Timur makes him feel. His struggles to accept himself make him lash out at everything, hurting the person he loves the most over and over again, and let me tell you; it's not easy to stomach. Ruth has a gift for capturing the deepest pain a heart can experience in her writing, and she has outdone herself with this one. Even though I wouldn't call Darren a loveable character, he's definitely one of the most interesting fictional people I've ever read about. No matter how rabid he gets, there's always that glimpse at a hurt, frightened child underneath his icy exterior, and I think that he will prompt more than one train of thought about the many times we offer up rage, when all we feel is sadness. A label as neat as "internalized homophobia" would do him a disservice, for his struggles are much more complex, and reach far beyond sexuality. To me, Darren feels like the author's way to say that no person can be put in just one box, and that no struggle is ever fully contained within a single word to describe it.
The other main character in this work is Timur Gao, who offers an unflinching look into the mechanics of codependency, and abusive relationships. As a refugee, Timur doesn't have anyone except for Darren, the one person who helped him and his sister when they arrived in the country. Thus, he feels indebted to Darren, and this intertwines with the romantic feelings he starts to develop later on. Between them grows a tangle of toxic love, power inequalities, and emotional dependence, and Timur is on the receiving end. He's by no means a weak character, or stupid; he's, unfortunately, in love.
Which is why I say that you can't expect a happy, feel-good romance, or maybe even classify this as a romance. The love Timur and Darren feel for each other is simply the stage Ruth has built to represent a play about rage, fear, control, and power. As a result, the reader is left holding a book that almost burns to the touch sometimes, and wondering how something so supposedly beautiful as loving someone could get so twisted and rotten in a matter of paragraphs. Truly, this book is a dark masterpiece, but beware; it's not for the faint of heart.
Little more than a side character in "Thirty Days With You", the book that started the Byanbyan-ma universe, Darren Huang becomes the main character in "Still Life". As a young Med student with a controlling girlfriend and a strict father, Darren isn't ready for the curveball life throws his way in the shape of Taishini refugees Timur and Lola Gan. Everything he thought he was, and wanted, comes crumbling down, and like a hurt animal, Darren kicks and thrashes to try to break free… Unsuccessfully. He loves Timur, and the truth of this is scary enough to make Darren run away. But then they run into each other ten years later, and unless Darren does something about it, the wounds of the past might destroy their present and future.
I've warned you before, and I'll warn you again: this story is going to break your heart. Ruth Miranda isn't a stranger to ugly pain and complicated characters, and the darkness she loves exploring in her works shows in every line. This isn't a tale about love; it's a tale about the ways in which we choose to reject it, and the ways it can be weaponised when we're scared and we don't have anything else with which to defend ourselves. Before the world can hurt him for loving Timur, Darren decides to hurt him to keep him away, and stay safe. Why? Because, despite having been born and raised in the open-minded, accepting country of Byanbyan-ma, Darren is terrified of how Timur makes him feel. His struggles to accept himself make him lash out at everything, hurting the person he loves the most over and over again, and let me tell you; it's not easy to stomach. Ruth has a gift for capturing the deepest pain a heart can experience in her writing, and she has outdone herself with this one. Even though I wouldn't call Darren a loveable character, he's definitely one of the most interesting fictional people I've ever read about. No matter how rabid he gets, there's always that glimpse at a hurt, frightened child underneath his icy exterior, and I think that he will prompt more than one train of thought about the many times we offer up rage, when all we feel is sadness. A label as neat as "internalized homophobia" would do him a disservice, for his struggles are much more complex, and reach far beyond sexuality. To me, Darren feels like the author's way to say that no person can be put in just one box, and that no struggle is ever fully contained within a single word to describe it.
The other main character in this work is Timur Gao, who offers an unflinching look into the mechanics of codependency, and abusive relationships. As a refugee, Timur doesn't have anyone except for Darren, the one person who helped him and his sister when they arrived in the country. Thus, he feels indebted to Darren, and this intertwines with the romantic feelings he starts to develop later on. Between them grows a tangle of toxic love, power inequalities, and emotional dependence, and Timur is on the receiving end. He's by no means a weak character, or stupid; he's, unfortunately, in love.
Which is why I say that you can't expect a happy, feel-good romance, or maybe even classify this as a romance. The love Timur and Darren feel for each other is simply the stage Ruth has built to represent a play about rage, fear, control, and power. As a result, the reader is left holding a book that almost burns to the touch sometimes, and wondering how something so supposedly beautiful as loving someone could get so twisted and rotten in a matter of paragraphs. Truly, this book is a dark masterpiece, but beware; it's not for the faint of heart.
July 16, 2022
Still life
Still Life will break your heart. If you want to feel intensely and achingly deep about characters, this book is for you. It is a tragic masterpiece with its protagonists’ flaws, conflicts and torments, laying the groundwork for much emotional suffering. It is the story of two young men who meet in 2006. Darren Huang is a medical student; living the life he believes he should be living, but not really content. Timur Gan, is a refuge from the fictional Asian island of Taishini. He has arrived with his younger sister, Lola, who he is responsible for, since their parents have died. She is seriously ill and they can only hope to find medical assistance for her in the more affluent and free-thinking fictional country of Byanbyan-Ma. Darren and Timur come from very different worlds, but the attraction is immediately felt by both. Darren wants to help Timur and Lola, and their lives tangle.
Darren’s dad is a revered doctor, a good but overbearing father. He also has a controlling girlfriend whom he seems to be avoiding. Timur, on the other hand, is poor and has come with his life savings, in the hope of saving his beloved sister. It isn’t enough money by a long shot. So the initial meeting of these two complex men is in the context of an already critical set of heartbreaking circumstances.
Ms. Miranda is a master at creating fictional countries and their cultures, and the Asian world of Byanbyan-MA comes to life in her writing. She’s also a master at creating compelling and flawed characters. As these two men share difficult events and get to know each other, you feel that they should be together. Their attraction is much deeper than simple lust. As with all classics, there needs to be conflict, and Darren has it in large doses. He cannot accept his sexual feelings for Timur and bitterly hates himself for his desires. Timur is an intelligent, highly sensitive young man who knows what he feels, sometimes too strongly. He has lived though many hardships; in some ways he knows himself better than the more privileged Darren. But nothing remains static, and Darren makes the decision to let Timur slip from his life.
Ten years later they meet again.
Can they have a second chance? This is a devastating but brilliant read. It is an adult book and one that will stay with you. This is not just a love story between two men. It is a story about self-rejection, self-inspection and the endless decisions we humans have to make all the time. And it is also about the things we cannot always control.
Still Life will break your heart. If you want to feel intensely and achingly deep about characters, this book is for you. It is a tragic masterpiece with its protagonists’ flaws, conflicts and torments, laying the groundwork for much emotional suffering. It is the story of two young men who meet in 2006. Darren Huang is a medical student; living the life he believes he should be living, but not really content. Timur Gan, is a refuge from the fictional Asian island of Taishini. He has arrived with his younger sister, Lola, who he is responsible for, since their parents have died. She is seriously ill and they can only hope to find medical assistance for her in the more affluent and free-thinking fictional country of Byanbyan-Ma. Darren and Timur come from very different worlds, but the attraction is immediately felt by both. Darren wants to help Timur and Lola, and their lives tangle.
Darren’s dad is a revered doctor, a good but overbearing father. He also has a controlling girlfriend whom he seems to be avoiding. Timur, on the other hand, is poor and has come with his life savings, in the hope of saving his beloved sister. It isn’t enough money by a long shot. So the initial meeting of these two complex men is in the context of an already critical set of heartbreaking circumstances.
Ms. Miranda is a master at creating fictional countries and their cultures, and the Asian world of Byanbyan-MA comes to life in her writing. She’s also a master at creating compelling and flawed characters. As these two men share difficult events and get to know each other, you feel that they should be together. Their attraction is much deeper than simple lust. As with all classics, there needs to be conflict, and Darren has it in large doses. He cannot accept his sexual feelings for Timur and bitterly hates himself for his desires. Timur is an intelligent, highly sensitive young man who knows what he feels, sometimes too strongly. He has lived though many hardships; in some ways he knows himself better than the more privileged Darren. But nothing remains static, and Darren makes the decision to let Timur slip from his life.
Ten years later they meet again.
Can they have a second chance? This is a devastating but brilliant read. It is an adult book and one that will stay with you. This is not just a love story between two men. It is a story about self-rejection, self-inspection and the endless decisions we humans have to make all the time. And it is also about the things we cannot always control.
October 9, 2025
This is
June 26, 2022
4.5⭐️
Ruth Miranda has pulled my heart out and crushed it 💔
Still Life returns to the fictional country of Byanbyan-Ma, this time following the tragic relationship of Darren and Timur. This is an intense, deeply complex tale of love, loss, denial and acceptance, and, ultimately, co-dependency.
Darren and Timur are a paradox: both crave the other, and yet all close proximity ends in disaster. They are, in many relatable ways, their own worst enemies, and there were many times that I wanted to shake some sense into them, then crush them both in a huge hug.
I'm a huge fan of Miranda's writing style: sophisticated, and portraying such visceral, raw emotion that I was immersed completely in their characters/stories. While some of Darren's thoughts did, for me personally, become a little repetitive, and I was occasionally thrown by the switch in narrators and timelines, this didn't distract from what is a beautiful, ultimately tragic tale of love and loss.
I am utterly heartbroken, and yet I still crave more. That, in itself, speaks volumes.
I would like to thank the author for providing me with an ARC copy of Still Life. All opinions are my own.
Ruth Miranda has pulled my heart out and crushed it 💔
Still Life returns to the fictional country of Byanbyan-Ma, this time following the tragic relationship of Darren and Timur. This is an intense, deeply complex tale of love, loss, denial and acceptance, and, ultimately, co-dependency.
Darren and Timur are a paradox: both crave the other, and yet all close proximity ends in disaster. They are, in many relatable ways, their own worst enemies, and there were many times that I wanted to shake some sense into them, then crush them both in a huge hug.
I'm a huge fan of Miranda's writing style: sophisticated, and portraying such visceral, raw emotion that I was immersed completely in their characters/stories. While some of Darren's thoughts did, for me personally, become a little repetitive, and I was occasionally thrown by the switch in narrators and timelines, this didn't distract from what is a beautiful, ultimately tragic tale of love and loss.
I am utterly heartbroken, and yet I still crave more. That, in itself, speaks volumes.
I would like to thank the author for providing me with an ARC copy of Still Life. All opinions are my own.
October 4, 2022
I did not realize that this book would be a crossover with characters from 30 Days With You which I had read just before picking up this story, and it was a delightful surprise!
I really enjoyed this family drama/(not) gay romance because of the realness of the characters. They acted like real people, which was aggravating a lot of the, but that's the point. I don't mind being aggravated in stories when characters act like real people - it adds to the authenticity of the page. And this book did not shy away from authenticity.
The characters were real and the story was full of raw emotion, and the ending hit me just right.
I really enjoyed this family drama/(not) gay romance because of the realness of the characters. They acted like real people, which was aggravating a lot of the, but that's the point. I don't mind being aggravated in stories when characters act like real people - it adds to the authenticity of the page. And this book did not shy away from authenticity.
The characters were real and the story was full of raw emotion, and the ending hit me just right.
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