The Singing Stick

by Phyllis Cole-Dai

As a fierce nor’easter bears down on her Massachusetts town, Fiona Richter places a frantic 911 call. Her husband, Simon, eighty years old and suffering from dementia, has gone missing from the house—along with his clarinet.

So begins THE SINGING STICK, the story of a son, his long-dead mother, and the music that anchors them both in times of great unmooring.

Editorial reviews have called this review "a startling tour de force" and "a remarkable achievement."

Genres: Book Club

374 pages, Paperback

Published September 4, 2024

About the author

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Phyllis Cole-Dai began pecking away on an old manual typewriter in childhood and never stopped. Her work explores things that tend to divide us, so that we might wrestle our way into deeper understandings of ourselves and others.

She has authored or edited more than a dozen books in multiple genres. Her latest book is The Singing Stick, a literary novel (September 2024). Other recent titles include Poetry of Presence II: More Mindfulness Poems, Staying Power II: Writings from a Year of Emergence, Staying Power: Writings from a Pandemic Year, For the Sake of One We Love and Are Losing: A Meditative Poem & Journal, Beneath the Same Stars: A Novel of the 1862 U.S.-Dakota War, and Poetry of Presence: An Anthology of Mindfulness Poetry.

Personal Background

Born in 1962 in the farming community of Mt. Blanchard, Ohio, Phyllis eventually graduated with a Bachelor of Arts (English, 1984) from Goshen College; a Master of Theological Studies (1987) from the Methodist Theological School; and a Master of Arts (English, 1993) from The Ohio State University.

Phyllis and her scientist-husband have lived for the past quarter-century in Brookings, South Dakota. In 2025 they will relocate to Catonsville, Maryland.

Speaking

Phyllis has long been in demand as a public speaker. She has appeared in all kinds of settings—religious, spiritual, educational, philanthropic, social-service, and civic. She still presents as her busy schedule allows. Please contact her if you would like to discuss booking possibilities.

Reviews

[Assumpta Moran · Rating 5 out of 5]

Sensitively written, heart tugging in place. I was drawn into the lives of the characters.
It flowed beautifully., I actually found it hard to put down. Excellent research into Native American History. My first time reading Phyllis Cole-Dai, but won’t be my last.

[Janice · Rating 5 out of 5]

I wish there was a six star category because this book deserves six stars! The author weaves the various themes of generational trauma,the effect of boarding schools on indigenous populations and how they learn to cope through music, child abuse, contemporary prejudice against people of color and the LBQT community, spirituality, and the supernatural into one beautiful tapestry. The story begins when a nor’easter is heading toward a small town. It is the 80th birthday of a man with Alzheimer’s disease who has just received a package from his daughter telling him the truth about his mother and his heritage. He has never trusted anyone except his wife due to the circumstances of his mother’s death. He uses his mother’s clarinet as a coping mechanism. He disappears with his saxophone and a turtle medallion that also belonged to his mother. The little girl next door who has been abused by her parents follows him. She sees a lady with a hat following him (the ghost of his dead mother) but only the little girl can see her. The story then switches to his mother’s story. She was a member of the Dakota tribe who was taken from her family on the reservation and sent far away to a boarding school to force her to assimilate. She probably was a descendant of the tribal members who were pushed out of Minnesota in the aftermath of the 1862 Dakota uprising and was experiencing generational trauma (to learn more about this please read Beneath the Same Stars by the same author).She learns to cope by playing the clarinet . She marries a white man and they keep her secret from his racist family. When she inadvertently reveals her secret she is raped and murdered by her brother-in-law. Her husband covers up the murder and says she committed suicide by hanging. However, her son witnessed the murder and buried it in his subconscious. The 80 year old man and the little girl disappear into the woods and guided by the ghost find shelter in a cave. They are finally found in critical condition by their gay Mohawk neighbor who has a matching turtle medallion in his car. The ending is ambiguous. Did he reach them in time to save them? It’s up to the reader to decide if there will be a happy ending.

[Gloria Heffernan · Rating 5 out of 5]

Phyllis Cole-Dai’s novel The Singing Stick begins with a 911 call from a desperate wife trying to find her husband Simon, an 80-year-old man with dementia who has wandered from home during a violent snowstorm. From those first few lines, Cole-Dai weaves together multiple stories of suffering, injustice, courage, and always at its core, the healing power of music. In this complex and moving novel, Cole-Dai addresses some of the most painful issues of modern life, and traces one of the darkest chapters of American history as it relates to this nation’s treatment of indigenous children and families. Cole-Dai’s even-handed narrative is never gratuitous or lurid. Instead, she writes with a level of clarity and control that reveals the horror in stark detail, while making it impossible for the reader to look away. But this novel is also a story that demonstrates the importance of community and the power of love. Spanning multiple generations, it draws us not only into the agonizing search for the endangered man, but also forces us to confront the historical injustices that have brought him – and us – to this moment. Meticulously researched, intricately structured, and tenderly rendered, The Singing Stick is an unforgettable novel from a gifted writer who weaves a compelling tale, and accompanies us on this dangerous but worthwhile journey.

[Nan Kuhlman · Rating 5 out of 5]

Set during the COVID pandemic, The Singing Stick is a story of caregiving and complicated family relationships. It makes plain that often we tell ourselves stories about family events that we’ve experienced, only to reflect later that they were about something else.
Cole Dai has masterfully told a story of complicated, transgenerational family relationships involving such relevant issues as the historic assimilation of Native American children, the effects of dementia on patients and their families, child molestation, veterans with PTSD, and the beauty of committed love in all its forms. She uses flashbacks, historic-looking correspondence that fills in the gaps, and the intersection of minor characters to provide the backstory for the major characters.
There’s also a mystical element that I enjoyed – the Hat Lady – who was only visible to the child Olivia. However, [slight spoiler] the supernatural or mystical element found in the last few chapters seems different, and the ending’s focus on one of the minor character’s interactions with the mystical element is almost too nebulous to grasp. That said, the story doesn’t tie up its loose ends neatly but allows the reader to choose her own ending. And who doesn’t want the chance to choose a happy ending?

[Cindy · Rating 5 out of 5]

Once I picked up this book, I could not put it down. The characters and the circumstances were so compelling that I just kept turning the pages. I was late to an event because it was so hard to close the pages and walk away. I lost sleep because I kept reading.

Those are the best kind of books, aren't they?

There are several story lines and multiple timeframes weaving in and out, with issues down at an individual level and issues at the cultural and societal level. All wove together beautifully, and my mind was frequently considering ramifications and implications. I love books like that.

The tragedy of Native Boarding Schools, the tragedy of dementia, the "rules" society tries to impose on individuals and/or the fear those supposed rules cause to those trying to stay under the radar. The character portrayals and situations are compelling, and as I said, I couldn't put it down.

I won't say more to avoid spoilers, but this book has great character appeal and an excellent through-story. Highly recommended. It will make you think afterwards about many things.

[Marianne Zarzana · Rating 5 out of 5]

When I finished reading The Singing Stick, I was speechless. Gobsmacked. Devastated. Blown away by the heartrending power of this story, by the brilliance of the craft, and by the humanity of the characters. Phyllis Cole-Dai has channeled a tale of horror and healing, of raw evil and redemption. She deftly weaves in threads from a dark chapter of U.S. history--the Indian boarding schools that stripped indigenous children of their culture to assimilate them. Set during the COVID pandemic, the novel takes us on a riveting journey to times past and beyond time. Music is the through line, sometimes mournful, at times exultant. The Singing Stick, one of the main characters, becomes the breathing heart and soul of this tale. I will recommend this novel to my book club and to others far and wide. Cole-Dai writes "across what divides us," and we need her writing now more than ever.

[Lorraine Coscia · Rating 5 out of 5]

From the first warning of a winter storm coming this book cannot be put down, get ready for a really good read that will pierce your heart and cause you to wonder about many things beginning with your own life and its hidden and buried secrets. An elder man is lost as his poor wife waits for help to find him, but there is so much more to be found than Simon as he wanders lost not too far from his home.
So many surprises to be told by master storyteller, Phyllis Cole-Dai. This book talks about uncomfortable topics that all of us know about but don't want to acknowledge: racism, prejudice, child abuse and more. Your heart will be moved with compassion. Your life will be enriched as you follow the story as it unfolds. This book will breathe new life into yours and all you encounter for the rest of your life.

Give yourself a gift, read this book.

lorraine Coscia-Ackerman

[Dianne · Rating 5 out of 5]

The Singing Stick explores complex social challenges with compassion and grace. While the deeply nuanced characters may make some readers squirm, they always retain their humanity. The novel is a lesson in living with the flaws of those around us and those we love, as well as our own. It is also an important lesson in a corner of US history that has received little attention and acknowledgement. The richly researched depiction of the impetus, implementation, and impact of Indian boarding schools is both heart-breaking and eye-opening. The intimate portrayal of decline and the restorative power of music is poignant while, somehow, uplifting. Kudos to the author for weaving together disparate themes into a compelling, vibrant, and lyrical narrative I could not put down!

[Dianne · Rating 5 out of 5]

The Singing Stick explores complex social challenges with compassion and grace. While the deeply nuanced characters may make some readers squirm, they always retain their humanity. The novel is a lesson in living with the flaws of those around us and those we love, as well as our own. It is also an important lesson in a corner of US history that has received little attention and acknowledgement. The richly researched depiction of the impetus, implementation, and impact of Indian boarding schools is both heart-breaking and eye-opening. The intimate portrayal of decline and the restorative power of music is poignant while, somehow, uplifting. Kudos to the author for weaving together disparate themes into a compelling, vibrant, and lyrical narrative I could not put down!

[Berta Winiker · Rating 5 out of 5]

Cole-Dai delivers a profound and heart-felt account of the angst when a loved one disappears. She inhabits her characters with much perception and gives voice to their shifting inyernal monologues. The variety of characters,young and old, strangers and familiars, who populate the story dive the “ticking of the clock” drama.
The story is laced with bursts of humor that surprise and punctuate the seriousness. This book would be a good choice for discussion groups and I intend to recommend this book to mine. Cole-Dai provides some well considered questions for reflection on the myriad of social issues. Her inclusion of musical playlists is another feature that adds dimension.

Berta

[Barbara Herr · Rating 5 out of 5]

Phyllis Cole-Dai transcends a multitude of current societal issues by weaving
a modern-day story with the various traditions and educational
mistreatment of Native Americans in the Great Plains Region. In the midst
of this, a handcrafted "singing stick" transports the past to the present,
bringing "life" to an aging man with dementia. This is an excellent read
which will touch the reader's heart on many levels.

[Lisa · Rating 5 out of 5]

I hated to have this book end! What a good story about music, loss, community, love, ghosts....I sometimes had to stop because I was horrified by how the Indian children were treated, being carted off to boarding school, but I had to return to finish the story of Simon. A man with dementia who goes missing. Yet he always remembers how to play his clarinet. What an affirmation of love and music. Ms. Cole-Dai got the music part so extremely right!

[Valerie · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book became much more than I expected at first. It was as if the (never heard) music wove itself into every level of the story. It became an ancestral discovery that reawakened the miracle of human connection and love. The story also had a bit of tension to keep it moving along. I was sorry to have it come to an end.

[Barbara Herr · Rating 5 out of 5]

Phyllis Cole-Dai transcends a multitude of current societal issues by weaving
a modern-day story with the various traditions and educational
mistreatment of Native Americans in the Great Plains Region. In the midst
of this, a handcrafted "singing stick" transports the past to the present,
bringing "life" to an aging man with dementia. This is an excellent read
which will touch the reader's heart on many levels.

[Karen Hoffman · Rating 4 out of 5]

There is a wonderful, rich cast of characters to meet in this book - some heartbreaking; others infuriating. There is secrecy, history, chance encounter and community - all of which came together in a compelling story that kept me reading. In fact, I believe there’s a sequel begging to be written, too…if not for all our characters at least for some.

[Annette · Rating 5 out of 5]

"The Singing Stick" by Phyllis Cole-Dai is historical fiction about a time in our country that has been mostly hidden. The story begins with Simon and a clarinet, which has a story of its own, connected to an important period in our nation. There is music in the story along with music in the creative use of language that captured my heart in this well-researched book. There are surprises that will keep you riveted along with a bit of mystical mystery. Cole-Dai writes with respect and compassion, and puts a good “story in the air” that “will alter you forever.”

[Lucy Radatz · Rating 5 out of 5]

Reading this book for me was dreamy. It is like when you have a dream and are left with a powerful new awareness that cannot quite be put into words. It asks you the question: What piece of the Song are you? Then it invites you to sing it.

[Jennifer · Rating 4 out of 5]

It took me a minute to get into this book but once I did it went fast. I was drawn in by curiosity about Vera’s life and family. This book expanded my historical imagination and sense of compassion. If you love music you will love the metaphor of music as voice, hope, and belonging, that flows throughout the novel!

[Valerie · Rating 5 out of 5]

A many layered story that goes deeper as the snow falls. It became much more than I expected at first, developing beautifully into a multi-generational story. The importance of ancestral influences from Indigenous beginnings comes to fruition in the present lives and talents and connections we are witness to. It is beautifully crafted and I was sorry to have it come to an end.

[Tiffany L · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book really grabbed me!! Excellent

[Jodi Jeannette · Rating 4 out of 5]

Beginning was a 4.
Middle was a 5!
End was a 3.

I actually adored the writing style and the inclusion of the documents but I genuinely needed like 3-5 more chapters to wrap a few things up.

[Susan E Civittolo · Rating 5 out of 5]

The Singing Stick is a must read for anyone who has ever experienced caring for someone with dementia. So beautifully written, I could picture the story as if I were there. A lesson in love and being proud of who you are and where you come from. Highly recommend, you will not want to put it down!

[Annette · Rating 5 out of 5]

"The Singing Stick" by Phyllis Cole-Dai is historical fiction about a time in our country that has been mostly hidden. The story begins with Simon and a clarinet, which has a story of its own, connected to an important period in our nation. There is music in the story, along with music in the creative use of language that captured my heart in this well-researched book. There are surprises that will keep you riveted, along with a bit of mystical mystery. Cole-Dai writes with respect and compassion, and puts a good “story in the air” that “will alter you forever.”