How to Write Sympathy Letters & Notes: 40 Ready-to-Use Letters

by Dianna Booher

Are you saddened but unsure about how best to express your deep feelings in the face of sorrow or tragedy? In sympathy situations, friends and family have the greatest need to hear from you. Don’t leave them wondering about your lack of concern.

• Begin your letter or note with a straightforward comment about your feelings—your sadness, your shock, your sorrow, or your concern.
• Mention something positive you remember about the individual or, if you did not know him or her personally, recall something you’ve heard others say.
• Let the reader know that you understand the extent of the loss or the painful situation in the case of a misfortune. But do show sensitivity. Avoid adding gruesome details or increasing the pain.
• If possible, and if you’re sincere, offer to help in some specific
• Be brief. You don’t need to go into all the details of the situation—how you heard the news or what so-and-so told you. Your caring concern in “I am so sorry” speaks volumes.
• Close with a comforting phrase—a final thought that reflects your concern and is appropriate to your relationship with the person.
• Make your words genuine and personal—as if you were talking face to face. This is not a task that you should delegate to someone else.
• Use your personal stationery or card. Typically, you should write the note by hand. But if you’re writing to a business colleague or client, a typed letter is acceptable—depending on the closeness of the association.

If you’d like to make the sympathy letter writing process even easier, we can help even more. If you still can’t find the right words to express comfort, try our professionally written package of sympathy letters and notes.

You’ll find sample sympathy letters for both personal and business

Personal Sympathy and Business Sympathy Letters
• Death of a child
• Death of a parent
• Death of a spouse
• Death of other relatives
• Miscarriage
• Death of pet
• Personal failures
• Disaster—loss of home
• Disaster—loss of business
• Business failure
• Financial ruin
• Loss of job—friend
• Loss of job—coworker
• Get well soon
• Terminal illness—friend
• Terminal illness—acquaintance
• Wedding—cancelled
• Divorce—to parents of those getting divorce
• Divorce—to friend or relative getting divorce
• Criminal conviction
• Crime victim

40 pages, Kindle Edition

First published January 31, 2012

About the author

Dianna Booher, MA, CSP, CPAE, is CEO of Booher Research Institute, Inc., a communication consulting and coaching firm.. She works with organizations to help them communicate clearly and with individuals to increase their influence through a strong personal presence--and sometimes with a published book!

She's the author of 49 books (translated into 62 foreign-language editions) and has published with Simon & Schuster/Pocket Books, Warner, Penguin Random House, McGraw-Hill, and Berrett-Koehler. Her latest books include:

-Faster, Fewer, Better Emails: Manager the Volume, Reduce the Stress, Love the Results

- Communicate Like a Leader: Connect Strategically to Coach, Inspire, and Get Things Done

- What More Can I Say?: Why Communication Fails and What to Do About It

- Creating Personal Presence:
Look, Talk, Think, and Act Like a Leader

- Communicate with Confidence:
How to Say it Right the First Time and Every Time
(Revised and Expanded Edition 2011)

- The Voice of Authority:
10 Communication Strategies Every Leader Needs to Know

- Booher’s Rules of Business Grammar:
101 Fast and Easy Ways to Correct the Most Common Errors

- Speak with Confidence:
Powerful Presentations That Inform, Inspire, and Persuade

- E-Writing: 21st-Century Tools for Effective Communication

- From Contact to Contract:
496 Proven Sales Tips to Generate More Leads, Close More Deals, Exceed Your Goals, and Make More Money

- Your Signature Work:
Creating Excellence and Influencing Others at Work

Dianna has been interviewed by Good Morning America, USA Today, Forbes, The Wall Street Journal, FOX, CNN, CNBC, National Public Radio, Dr. Laura Radio Show, Washington Post, New York Newsday, Bloomberg, Boardroom Reports, Investor’s Business Daily, Industry Week, Success, and Entrepreneur, among other national radio, TV, and newspapers.

Her work has also won its share of recognition. Several titles have been major book club selections, and others have won national industry awards:
-American Library Association: Best Young -Adult Non-Fiction of the Year
-Executive Soundview Summaries: Best --Business Book of the Decade
--Axiom Award Silver Medal (2018)
--Richtopia's Top 200 Most Influential Authors in the World (2017, 2018)
-New York Film Festival—Cindy Award (nominee) (Corporate Training Division)
-Newbridge Executive Book Club—Main Selection
-Macmillan Executive Book Club Selection
-Fortune Book Club Selection
-Writers Digest Book Club Selection
-Business Week Book Club
-Book-of-the-Month Club (alternate selection)
-Money Book Club