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Illusion of Memory
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Displaying 1 - 3 of 3 reviews
October 4, 2016
The book opens with a beautiful and chilling quote from Jonathan Boyarin: “We cannot regain what is lost, if only because it never existed as we remember it.”
The entire novel is based upon this premise. It’s difficult to know what truly takes place in this story, both in the past and the present setting of the novel, because it is all based upon the memories of one character, who in turn relies upon the memories of others around her, related to her, of her family’s past. Many of the main character’s memories, Bettylein (Betty, Bette; she refers to herself and is referred to by others in the story by multiple versions of her name, Elizabeth) are related through symbolic dreams, as she has repressed the first twelve years of her childhood, and these recollections slowly begin to ‘unravel’ through the care and guidance of a few different psychologists.
The entire story, however, is also related through a series of journal and diary entries, and letters between two sisters, as well as a few letters from the father, and journal entries of Bette’s final therapist, Roberta. It’s difficult to know what is real and what is imagined, as the letters between the two sisters, while at first seeming to be separated by both distance and experience, slowly begin to share seemingly overlapping details that at first could be dismissed as mere coincidence, but as the story continues to unfold, it quickly becomes obvious that there is a much more deeply-seated reason for this overlap.
This is a complex puzzle of long lasting trauma from the effects of the Holocaust, and how it damages a family, for generations to come. It is also (and quite separately) about the effects of trauma and abuse early in childhood, and the delusions and breaks that can be caused in a person’s psyche. However, the line here blurs, once again, between how much of the trauma this child endures is simply from a sick family that is abusive, and how much of that abuse itself might be directly related to the Holocaust.
The entire book unravels in a series of journal entries and letters that develop more and more into dreamlike sequences, becoming all the more disturbing and psychotic with each page turned. And yet, in between these ongoing ‘dreams’ there are pieces to the puzzle; answers to the mystery of just what kind of horrors this family was forced to endure, both during and after the war. Small glimpses into the abusive behavior that Bettylein (as her father always calls her) was a victim to, years after the war, in New York, and further hints at just what the true relationship is between Bette and her sister, Lizzie.
This is a heartbreaking and disturbing fictional dive into psychological trauma that can do nothing else but leave the reader devastated, having offered only the slightest aftertaste and lingering echoes of memory, faded and off-kilter, that hint at a horror so large, one is glad and relieved to not know the full-colored recollections of this poor young woman’s experiences. The illusion of memory is the only thing that protects both the reader, as well as the main character of Bette from utter despondency; and in the case of Bettylein, those very illusions (delusions) are the very thing that save her from complete and utter madness, and allow her to function on any level, or live any kind of life outside the walls of an asylum.
This is a beautifully rendered tale, albeit difficult to read. The prose is laced with deep undercurrents of pain and repression, delusions, illusions, and ultimately, salvation, but this isn’t a fairy tale, it’s a dark drama of momentous proportions, and some of the memories that do surface, related in Bette’s diary and dreams, are enough to turn the stomach of any reader with the slightest sense of compassion. The prose, while dreamlike in style at times, also clearly relates past repressed recollections that are nauseating, with equally shocking and disgusting revelations. But ultimately, the story has bittersweet heartbreak to offer the reader, as well as a small sense of fading hope.
This book is in defense of the illusions of memory, as well as in condemnation of them. Denying the truth of an experience, spinning it to be something else, covering up truths, creating false memories in others when relating lies of the past, instead of the stark naked reality of events: these are all the condemning effects of illusion. Creating new identities, allies, imaginary friends, lovers and other companions: these are in defense of the illusion of memory. For nothing inside this novel is as it would seem, including who the victims are, and who the villains. In the end, isn’t the illusion of all our memories the only thing we truly “know” of our or anyone else’s life?
This novel was an incredible read, earth shattering in many ways, and on the precipice of psychological genius, especially in the use of certain psychological tactics by abusers of ‘gas lighting’, and other psychological components, including memory repression, delusions, and the creating of false memories and even people. This book should be assigned reading for any Bachelor’s Psychology program, along with other great reads, such as “The Prince of Tides”, “Heart of Darkness”, “The Yellow Wallpaper”, “Atonement”, “The Girl on the Train”, “The Memory Keeper’s Daughter”, etc.
If you like dark, disturbing, gritty and openly honest psychological dramas, you’ll love this book. If you like mysteries and suspense, you’ll also enjoy this story. If you enjoy deeply emotional stories about broken or flawed characters, mixed with historical fiction, this is also a book I highly suggest you check out. It may be difficult to read at times, as anyone with an ounce of humanity inside them would struggle to keep reading certain passages relating abuse and victimization, both during and after the Holocaust. However, the difficult parts of the story are not only necessary, but integral to the ultimate lyricism and beauty of this tale. This is a narrative from the heart, and it will touch the reader’s soul, if allowed to delve that deeply into the mixed, confused and shattered psyche of the character of Bette, and the connections that can be made to her abuse in the 1950s-1970s, with the Holocaust some thirty to fifty years prior. Although Bette’s family is referenced many times throughout the book as having several members who ‘survived’ the Holocaust, by the end of this novel, the reader will have no choice but to re-evaluate the definition of ‘survival’ in terms of the victims and their families, and the generations to come in the direct aftermath of that tragedy, and exactly what the meaning of survival truly should be. The only other scenario I can compare this idea to is the dilemma faced in “Sophie’s Choice”, in so far as, after enduring such a traumatic experience and faced with such a horrible decision, how much did Sophie truly ‘survive’ or live in the aftermath? And afterwards, broken as she was, how fit was Sophie to interact with or be responsible for the care and caring of others?
I’m glad I read this book, and I highly recommend it to others. It will make you think and contemplate quite a few things in life, both your own, and others, past and present. And I guarantee this story will stay with you long after you read the final page.
The entire novel is based upon this premise. It’s difficult to know what truly takes place in this story, both in the past and the present setting of the novel, because it is all based upon the memories of one character, who in turn relies upon the memories of others around her, related to her, of her family’s past. Many of the main character’s memories, Bettylein (Betty, Bette; she refers to herself and is referred to by others in the story by multiple versions of her name, Elizabeth) are related through symbolic dreams, as she has repressed the first twelve years of her childhood, and these recollections slowly begin to ‘unravel’ through the care and guidance of a few different psychologists.
The entire story, however, is also related through a series of journal and diary entries, and letters between two sisters, as well as a few letters from the father, and journal entries of Bette’s final therapist, Roberta. It’s difficult to know what is real and what is imagined, as the letters between the two sisters, while at first seeming to be separated by both distance and experience, slowly begin to share seemingly overlapping details that at first could be dismissed as mere coincidence, but as the story continues to unfold, it quickly becomes obvious that there is a much more deeply-seated reason for this overlap.
This is a complex puzzle of long lasting trauma from the effects of the Holocaust, and how it damages a family, for generations to come. It is also (and quite separately) about the effects of trauma and abuse early in childhood, and the delusions and breaks that can be caused in a person’s psyche. However, the line here blurs, once again, between how much of the trauma this child endures is simply from a sick family that is abusive, and how much of that abuse itself might be directly related to the Holocaust.
The entire book unravels in a series of journal entries and letters that develop more and more into dreamlike sequences, becoming all the more disturbing and psychotic with each page turned. And yet, in between these ongoing ‘dreams’ there are pieces to the puzzle; answers to the mystery of just what kind of horrors this family was forced to endure, both during and after the war. Small glimpses into the abusive behavior that Bettylein (as her father always calls her) was a victim to, years after the war, in New York, and further hints at just what the true relationship is between Bette and her sister, Lizzie.
This is a heartbreaking and disturbing fictional dive into psychological trauma that can do nothing else but leave the reader devastated, having offered only the slightest aftertaste and lingering echoes of memory, faded and off-kilter, that hint at a horror so large, one is glad and relieved to not know the full-colored recollections of this poor young woman’s experiences. The illusion of memory is the only thing that protects both the reader, as well as the main character of Bette from utter despondency; and in the case of Bettylein, those very illusions (delusions) are the very thing that save her from complete and utter madness, and allow her to function on any level, or live any kind of life outside the walls of an asylum.
This is a beautifully rendered tale, albeit difficult to read. The prose is laced with deep undercurrents of pain and repression, delusions, illusions, and ultimately, salvation, but this isn’t a fairy tale, it’s a dark drama of momentous proportions, and some of the memories that do surface, related in Bette’s diary and dreams, are enough to turn the stomach of any reader with the slightest sense of compassion. The prose, while dreamlike in style at times, also clearly relates past repressed recollections that are nauseating, with equally shocking and disgusting revelations. But ultimately, the story has bittersweet heartbreak to offer the reader, as well as a small sense of fading hope.
This book is in defense of the illusions of memory, as well as in condemnation of them. Denying the truth of an experience, spinning it to be something else, covering up truths, creating false memories in others when relating lies of the past, instead of the stark naked reality of events: these are all the condemning effects of illusion. Creating new identities, allies, imaginary friends, lovers and other companions: these are in defense of the illusion of memory. For nothing inside this novel is as it would seem, including who the victims are, and who the villains. In the end, isn’t the illusion of all our memories the only thing we truly “know” of our or anyone else’s life?
This novel was an incredible read, earth shattering in many ways, and on the precipice of psychological genius, especially in the use of certain psychological tactics by abusers of ‘gas lighting’, and other psychological components, including memory repression, delusions, and the creating of false memories and even people. This book should be assigned reading for any Bachelor’s Psychology program, along with other great reads, such as “The Prince of Tides”, “Heart of Darkness”, “The Yellow Wallpaper”, “Atonement”, “The Girl on the Train”, “The Memory Keeper’s Daughter”, etc.
If you like dark, disturbing, gritty and openly honest psychological dramas, you’ll love this book. If you like mysteries and suspense, you’ll also enjoy this story. If you enjoy deeply emotional stories about broken or flawed characters, mixed with historical fiction, this is also a book I highly suggest you check out. It may be difficult to read at times, as anyone with an ounce of humanity inside them would struggle to keep reading certain passages relating abuse and victimization, both during and after the Holocaust. However, the difficult parts of the story are not only necessary, but integral to the ultimate lyricism and beauty of this tale. This is a narrative from the heart, and it will touch the reader’s soul, if allowed to delve that deeply into the mixed, confused and shattered psyche of the character of Bette, and the connections that can be made to her abuse in the 1950s-1970s, with the Holocaust some thirty to fifty years prior. Although Bette’s family is referenced many times throughout the book as having several members who ‘survived’ the Holocaust, by the end of this novel, the reader will have no choice but to re-evaluate the definition of ‘survival’ in terms of the victims and their families, and the generations to come in the direct aftermath of that tragedy, and exactly what the meaning of survival truly should be. The only other scenario I can compare this idea to is the dilemma faced in “Sophie’s Choice”, in so far as, after enduring such a traumatic experience and faced with such a horrible decision, how much did Sophie truly ‘survive’ or live in the aftermath? And afterwards, broken as she was, how fit was Sophie to interact with or be responsible for the care and caring of others?
I’m glad I read this book, and I highly recommend it to others. It will make you think and contemplate quite a few things in life, both your own, and others, past and present. And I guarantee this story will stay with you long after you read the final page.
June 4, 2015
Honestly - words are difficult to use in describing this book. It wasn’t what I was expecting, at all. I mean this in the best of ways. I don’t know what I was expecting, but this turned out to be beautiful, poignant, haunting, poetic … like taking Neruda’s “I could write the saddest lines” and expanding that feeling into a novel.
I recall after finishing this I sat there astounded and moved to absolute silence. Have you ever read a really poetic, beautiful book that left you totally speechless, and you sat there holding the book in your hands staring into space so you can hold on to those feelings for just a little bit longer? For me, this book was precisely like that.
I recall after finishing this I sat there astounded and moved to absolute silence. Have you ever read a really poetic, beautiful book that left you totally speechless, and you sat there holding the book in your hands staring into space so you can hold on to those feelings for just a little bit longer? For me, this book was precisely like that.
January 29, 2016
Illusion of Memory
The correspondence between two sisters through diary entries and letters sets a backdrop to a timeless story of love and loss. The correspondence allows two sisters to share their experiences of the present and the past. Though they are separated by distance they remain connected through words. And those words divulge a story depicting the sisters generational past-their Jewish descent, history, and families survival through the Holocaust. The story details the legacy left to them to revisit and embrace as they are challenged by their own journey. The sisters become heroines in their own right and readers will root for them. The characters are well developed and the story is complex and likable. The various settings draw the reader into the story.
Excerpt: I now realize that my obsession with transvestite prostitutes began with a conversation I happened to overhear as a child.
I chose this excerpt because I am not particularly interested in memoirs or diary platforms to tell a story; however, it was outlandish statements like the one above that kept me going. Almost comical in a serious setting. The duality of content is what made Illusion of Memory more complex and almost crucial to this story. There were many odd and interesting statements and pieces of information that allowed me to finish and understand the many layers of this novel. It was an unexpected read. JZ Holden is a wordsmith. -M. Espinola
The correspondence between two sisters through diary entries and letters sets a backdrop to a timeless story of love and loss. The correspondence allows two sisters to share their experiences of the present and the past. Though they are separated by distance they remain connected through words. And those words divulge a story depicting the sisters generational past-their Jewish descent, history, and families survival through the Holocaust. The story details the legacy left to them to revisit and embrace as they are challenged by their own journey. The sisters become heroines in their own right and readers will root for them. The characters are well developed and the story is complex and likable. The various settings draw the reader into the story.
Excerpt: I now realize that my obsession with transvestite prostitutes began with a conversation I happened to overhear as a child.
I chose this excerpt because I am not particularly interested in memoirs or diary platforms to tell a story; however, it was outlandish statements like the one above that kept me going. Almost comical in a serious setting. The duality of content is what made Illusion of Memory more complex and almost crucial to this story. There were many odd and interesting statements and pieces of information that allowed me to finish and understand the many layers of this novel. It was an unexpected read. JZ Holden is a wordsmith. -M. Espinola
Displaying 1 - 3 of 3 reviews