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My Granny Writes Erotica - Threesome
The erotica-writing granny in novel form.
The original, critically acclaimed novella, locked in a saucy threesome with its hit sequel and a bonus bit on the side, to provide a full, novel-length read.
In need of a ‘get rich quick’ scheme, 65-year-old, straight-laced Betty tries her hand at writing an erotic novel. However, with little experience in matters of the libido, Betty finds herself ill-equipped to pursue her goal and seeks help in the most unexpected places.
When she finds her elderly mother-in-law with nipple clamps dangling from her earlobes, the suburban housewife realises she’s a corrupting influence and hangs up her pen. However, the demands of her greedy family force Betty to sell the film rights to her novel – on one condition: she has no part in the creation of such revolting cinematic filth.
And after courting her new beau for many months, Betty is finally ready to cement their love. However, everybody she knows seems to have an opinion on modern bedroom etiquette. Mistakenly believing she’s found the ideal setting for her romantic getaway, Betty books a night at the elusive Exotic Aristocrat Boutique.
The original, critically acclaimed novella, locked in a saucy threesome with its hit sequel and a bonus bit on the side, to provide a full, novel-length read.
In need of a ‘get rich quick’ scheme, 65-year-old, straight-laced Betty tries her hand at writing an erotic novel. However, with little experience in matters of the libido, Betty finds herself ill-equipped to pursue her goal and seeks help in the most unexpected places.
When she finds her elderly mother-in-law with nipple clamps dangling from her earlobes, the suburban housewife realises she’s a corrupting influence and hangs up her pen. However, the demands of her greedy family force Betty to sell the film rights to her novel – on one condition: she has no part in the creation of such revolting cinematic filth.
And after courting her new beau for many months, Betty is finally ready to cement their love. However, everybody she knows seems to have an opinion on modern bedroom etiquette. Mistakenly believing she’s found the ideal setting for her romantic getaway, Betty books a night at the elusive Exotic Aristocrat Boutique.
330 pages, Paperback
First published March 1, 2013
About the author
Rosen Trevithick
32 books274 followersRosen is a British bestselling author, who writes fiction for children and adults.
She was born in Cornwall and grew up on Restronguet Creek. She studied Experimental Psychology at St Catherine's College, Oxford, before moving back to the West Country. She now lives on the south coast of Devon with two imaginary cats, fantasising about getting a real one.
In 2011 Rosen was an aspiring author. Writing was a hobby. The following January sales of her books on Kindle took off, and by October she has sold 27,000 copies and her total download count exceeds 220,000. She now has three books in print: Pompomberry House, Seesaw and The Troll Trap, as well as many digital titles.
Rosen writes in a variety of genres with a strong leaning towards comedy. She has also dabbled with psychological fiction and mystery writing.
She loves wild swimming, mountain biking, interesting boots, quiffs, 'sampling' chocolate and cooking tasty treats. She dislikes house spiders, doing laundry and people putting costumes on their cats.
She was born in Cornwall and grew up on Restronguet Creek. She studied Experimental Psychology at St Catherine's College, Oxford, before moving back to the West Country. She now lives on the south coast of Devon with two imaginary cats, fantasising about getting a real one.
In 2011 Rosen was an aspiring author. Writing was a hobby. The following January sales of her books on Kindle took off, and by October she has sold 27,000 copies and her total download count exceeds 220,000. She now has three books in print: Pompomberry House, Seesaw and The Troll Trap, as well as many digital titles.
Rosen writes in a variety of genres with a strong leaning towards comedy. She has also dabbled with psychological fiction and mystery writing.
She loves wild swimming, mountain biking, interesting boots, quiffs, 'sampling' chocolate and cooking tasty treats. She dislikes house spiders, doing laundry and people putting costumes on their cats.
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Displaying 1 - 21 of 21 reviews
April 4, 2014
Imagine an innocent older lady’s reaction to finding about modern sex practises, funny? No? Well this novel is exactly that: I don’t think I’ve ever laughed this much when reading a book. Not just a small laugh, but a roll on the floor laugh that just leaves you tickled. I loved it, from beginning to end.
The first part of the book was originally a novella; the second part its sequel and the third a little extra:
1.
Betty Brown is a typical 65-year-old housewife; prude, haughty and a little snobbish. She’s writing a novel that publishers won’t buy. When debt collectors come knocking she is forced to change her book; her masterpiece, into something cheaper, something with less class. After conducting her own research she is left in a quagmire of sex toys, but with the help of a lady of the night, her book becomes an erotica phenomenon under the pseudonym of Figgy Brown
2.
After her elevation to fame, Betty hosts a garden party to prove what a respectable lady she is. Things go horribly wrong when a series of unfortunate circumstances make the guest believe they’ve been invited to some form of sex party. In addition her novel is being made into a film which she believes to be too “raunchy.”
3.
Ted, a seemingly perfect man arrives on the scene. Betty and Ted decide to book into a hotel but indivertibly Betty books into a sex hotel.
I preferred the first part of the book because I think it contained the most humour but nonetheless, the other two parts are very enjoyable. I would recommend this to anybody who likes a good laugh and have already passed it on to someone else to read.
I won this book as a giveaway, here, on goodreads.
The first part of the book was originally a novella; the second part its sequel and the third a little extra:
1.
Betty Brown is a typical 65-year-old housewife; prude, haughty and a little snobbish. She’s writing a novel that publishers won’t buy. When debt collectors come knocking she is forced to change her book; her masterpiece, into something cheaper, something with less class. After conducting her own research she is left in a quagmire of sex toys, but with the help of a lady of the night, her book becomes an erotica phenomenon under the pseudonym of Figgy Brown
2.
After her elevation to fame, Betty hosts a garden party to prove what a respectable lady she is. Things go horribly wrong when a series of unfortunate circumstances make the guest believe they’ve been invited to some form of sex party. In addition her novel is being made into a film which she believes to be too “raunchy.”
3.
Ted, a seemingly perfect man arrives on the scene. Betty and Ted decide to book into a hotel but indivertibly Betty books into a sex hotel.
I preferred the first part of the book because I think it contained the most humour but nonetheless, the other two parts are very enjoyable. I would recommend this to anybody who likes a good laugh and have already passed it on to someone else to read.
I won this book as a giveaway, here, on goodreads.
March 29, 2016
Fantastic! I wouldn't recommend reading this anywhere you might get odd looks for laughing at a book. I had to work hard not to giggle at the exploits of Betty (aka Figgy), Muriel and their family, friends and less than friendly acquaintances. Definitely an amusing read.
May 23, 2014
If you enjoy being made to laugh out loud as you journey to work on the bus - this is a book for you. If you can stifle a snicker as the "my little pony" advert comes on the television - this is a book for you. If you enjoyed the comic ambiguity of people like Hyacinth Bucket, or the verbal dexterity of the late Ronnie Barker - this is a book for you.
If you are looking for smut, vulgarity, deviancy or titilation - go away.
Betty was a woman comfortable with her life, her husband was a respected Estate Agent, she kept a proud house in a desirable street, she was writing a work of literature [not self publishing poetic drivel like her literary club chairwoman], her daughter had married well, they had savings, could afford the pleasantness of life and were members of the country club. What could go wrong?
Secrets and lies delve Betty into an unknown world of loan sharks, a husband with a sexual desire to be placed in a nappy and spanked, and an inconsiderate daughter who moves back home. Money was needed, and quickly, when an ambiguous beginning of a serialised self-published e-book dropped her into the darkness of “kinky-dumpy-pumpy”, Betty was painfully out of her depth and her sexual knowledge base was more vanilla than a vanilla pod. The only person Betty knew who knew about such activities was her husband’s ‘lady of the night’, Scarlet. Once the wheel of success started to turn Betty is swept up into a series of situational comedic happenings, her middle class tweedy sense of decorum and propriety is constantly embarrassed by her curious innocence at just what people craved and did to satisfy their desires.
While the success of Betty's book solves one problem, her independent finances, the world wants to know who the author of this international best seller is and when it is discovered a whole new pile of problems, embarrassment and misdirection ensues. Betty tries to put her success and its reputation aside and restore her social standing but society and its hypocrisy is not ready to. Even when she accepts her fate and summons the confidence dip her toe in the pool of romance, her blinkered virtue lands her in a very peculiar “sophisticated hotel”.
The authors understanding not only of language but also of the human complexities when it comes to communication is the cream to these novellas, so much of the spoken [or indeed written] word is implied, within a non-verbalised context and comes from between the lines, it is no wonder that the most simple of four letter word can cause such chaos, the word being 'like'.
Congrats Rosen on a trio of giggles on a subject that could easily have sunk into the mire of vulgarity.
If you are looking for smut, vulgarity, deviancy or titilation - go away.
Betty was a woman comfortable with her life, her husband was a respected Estate Agent, she kept a proud house in a desirable street, she was writing a work of literature [not self publishing poetic drivel like her literary club chairwoman], her daughter had married well, they had savings, could afford the pleasantness of life and were members of the country club. What could go wrong?
Secrets and lies delve Betty into an unknown world of loan sharks, a husband with a sexual desire to be placed in a nappy and spanked, and an inconsiderate daughter who moves back home. Money was needed, and quickly, when an ambiguous beginning of a serialised self-published e-book dropped her into the darkness of “kinky-dumpy-pumpy”, Betty was painfully out of her depth and her sexual knowledge base was more vanilla than a vanilla pod. The only person Betty knew who knew about such activities was her husband’s ‘lady of the night’, Scarlet. Once the wheel of success started to turn Betty is swept up into a series of situational comedic happenings, her middle class tweedy sense of decorum and propriety is constantly embarrassed by her curious innocence at just what people craved and did to satisfy their desires.
While the success of Betty's book solves one problem, her independent finances, the world wants to know who the author of this international best seller is and when it is discovered a whole new pile of problems, embarrassment and misdirection ensues. Betty tries to put her success and its reputation aside and restore her social standing but society and its hypocrisy is not ready to. Even when she accepts her fate and summons the confidence dip her toe in the pool of romance, her blinkered virtue lands her in a very peculiar “sophisticated hotel”.
The authors understanding not only of language but also of the human complexities when it comes to communication is the cream to these novellas, so much of the spoken [or indeed written] word is implied, within a non-verbalised context and comes from between the lines, it is no wonder that the most simple of four letter word can cause such chaos, the word being 'like'.
Congrats Rosen on a trio of giggles on a subject that could easily have sunk into the mire of vulgarity.
April 13, 2014
I have been a huge fan of Rosen Trevithick for a long while, and really loved My Granny Writes Erotica 1, and so was thrilled when she sent me a paperback copy of this, the complete works.
The first part is the original which started the ball rolling, a cracking little novella that can be read in a couple of hours, ideal for anyone who has ever wondered just who writes those erotic novels on Amazon. Betty, who would certainly class herself as a Lady with a capital L, has been writing and rewriting a novel for the past 20 years but when needs dictate, she decides to revamp her "baby" as an erotic serial a la 50 Shades. The fun starts when she has to try and keep it a secret from her mother in law and daughter, as well as try to work out what these strange sex toys that arrive in the post are used for, and how she can incorporate them into her book.
The second part of the book sees Betty finally achieving her publishing deal. Her erotic novel “Ricardo Haberdasher” is a resounding success and film rights are in the offing, with the result that her life is about to change completely, not necessarily in a way that Betty wants, however. She wants just to be respectable, ladylike “Betty” and not “Figgy Brown” author of erotica.
The whole book is Fun with a capital F, although not necessarily of the clean kind, being stuffed full of sex toys, fetish clothing and innuendo. It is rude, crude and smutty and very wittily written. I love the way Betty tries her hardest to hang on to her position in respectable society, in particular she wants her membership of the Country Club reinstated after she was ousted as being “not the sort of person we want”. Unfortunately, despite her best efforts, she just seems to get it wrong every time with extremely funny results. Similarly, I really enjoyed the love/hate relationship she has with Muriel.
It comes complete with a third quick read story at the end about Betty’s attempt for a romantic evening in a hotel which really made me laugh. It is definitely not for the easily shocked, but is a great, fun read that will leave you smiling.
The first part is the original which started the ball rolling, a cracking little novella that can be read in a couple of hours, ideal for anyone who has ever wondered just who writes those erotic novels on Amazon. Betty, who would certainly class herself as a Lady with a capital L, has been writing and rewriting a novel for the past 20 years but when needs dictate, she decides to revamp her "baby" as an erotic serial a la 50 Shades. The fun starts when she has to try and keep it a secret from her mother in law and daughter, as well as try to work out what these strange sex toys that arrive in the post are used for, and how she can incorporate them into her book.
The second part of the book sees Betty finally achieving her publishing deal. Her erotic novel “Ricardo Haberdasher” is a resounding success and film rights are in the offing, with the result that her life is about to change completely, not necessarily in a way that Betty wants, however. She wants just to be respectable, ladylike “Betty” and not “Figgy Brown” author of erotica.
The whole book is Fun with a capital F, although not necessarily of the clean kind, being stuffed full of sex toys, fetish clothing and innuendo. It is rude, crude and smutty and very wittily written. I love the way Betty tries her hardest to hang on to her position in respectable society, in particular she wants her membership of the Country Club reinstated after she was ousted as being “not the sort of person we want”. Unfortunately, despite her best efforts, she just seems to get it wrong every time with extremely funny results. Similarly, I really enjoyed the love/hate relationship she has with Muriel.
It comes complete with a third quick read story at the end about Betty’s attempt for a romantic evening in a hotel which really made me laugh. It is definitely not for the easily shocked, but is a great, fun read that will leave you smiling.
January 7, 2014
I wrote this book because so many readers wanted to know more about Betty Betty, the erotica-writing granny.
It begins with the original novella, My Granny Writes Erotica. Betty's deceitful husband has run up enormous debts and engaged in some whopping bedroom indiscretions. Betty needs to save the family from financial ruin and so decides to jazz up the literary romance she's spent her life writing. However, she's far too straight-laced to handle becoming an erotic novelist and gets herself into all manner of pickles.
The story then extends into life after Betty's bonkbuster. How will a respectable suburban housewife deal with the 'fifth' she has invited into her life? This tale was published separately as My Granny Writes Erotica 2.
The final tale in the threesome is a bonus story designed to make the collection even more appealing than the separate novellas. I don't want to tell you too much about the story for fear of spoiling it, but there's be 60 new pages of Betty Berry hilarity.
It begins with the original novella, My Granny Writes Erotica. Betty's deceitful husband has run up enormous debts and engaged in some whopping bedroom indiscretions. Betty needs to save the family from financial ruin and so decides to jazz up the literary romance she's spent her life writing. However, she's far too straight-laced to handle becoming an erotic novelist and gets herself into all manner of pickles.
The story then extends into life after Betty's bonkbuster. How will a respectable suburban housewife deal with the 'fifth' she has invited into her life? This tale was published separately as My Granny Writes Erotica 2.
The final tale in the threesome is a bonus story designed to make the collection even more appealing than the separate novellas. I don't want to tell you too much about the story for fear of spoiling it, but there's be 60 new pages of Betty Berry hilarity.
March 24, 2014
Of all the First Reads giveaways I’ve entered, I think My Granny Writes Erotica is the book I’ve most wanted to win. I was thrilled to get an e-mail to tell me I had won, and very excited to open the parcel that arrived two days later. This is my honest review.
The book itself is lovely, good quality and with a velvety feel to the cover. Very luxurious!
You can read the synopsis above, so I won’t go into detail here.
Betty’s exploits as a 65-year-old erotica writer are, to be honest, hilarious. At times I was reminded of Keeping Up Appearances. Betty is very proper and uptight about sex, so the situations she finds herself in whilst writing the novel are just brilliant. At times I guessed what was going to go wrong next, but others (the bunting, for example) were a complete surprise.
The cast of characters is great. Betty’s mother-in-law was probably my favourite character, but they’re all well-crafted and by the end of the book I felt like I knew them all. I was certainly rooting for Betty to make it through all the scrapes with her dignity as intact as possible.
Rosen Trevithick’s writing style suits the story perfectly and it was a pleasure to read. I’ll definitely be checking out more of her books in future, especially if they contain the same great writing and humour.
The book itself is lovely, good quality and with a velvety feel to the cover. Very luxurious!
You can read the synopsis above, so I won’t go into detail here.
Betty’s exploits as a 65-year-old erotica writer are, to be honest, hilarious. At times I was reminded of Keeping Up Appearances. Betty is very proper and uptight about sex, so the situations she finds herself in whilst writing the novel are just brilliant. At times I guessed what was going to go wrong next, but others (the bunting, for example) were a complete surprise.
The cast of characters is great. Betty’s mother-in-law was probably my favourite character, but they’re all well-crafted and by the end of the book I felt like I knew them all. I was certainly rooting for Betty to make it through all the scrapes with her dignity as intact as possible.
Rosen Trevithick’s writing style suits the story perfectly and it was a pleasure to read. I’ll definitely be checking out more of her books in future, especially if they contain the same great writing and humour.
June 26, 2014
I won this book on a goodreads.com giveaway a week or so ago.
It's a light hearted, kind of middle class genteel comedy with a naughty twist, without being offensive. I can imagine this being a serialised evening drama/comedy tv programme. The book is three sections, I suppose a bit of a send up of the whole erotica genre and current trend with the 50 Shades of Gray hysteria. Betty Berry, 65 when the book starts, finds her marriage over, her house remortgaged, and a loan shark wanting money he lent to her husband, back. Most people would just get a job, but that wouldn't make for good comedy, so prim and proper Betty Berry decides to write an erotic novel to cash in. The fact that she is painfully naive makes for some fun, as she ends up turning it unintentionally into quite a hard core thing. And people go nuts for it. Perhaps not the way she wanted to make her literary debut, as she had been working for the last twenty years on a twee romance about Richmond Tabernacle (strong in the office/shy in the bedroom) - oh, that tag line made me laugh. The second part is about her coming to terms with the fame, and the film they're making of her erotic novel; the third a few years later and Betty may have found love.
It's good light hearted summer reading.
It's a light hearted, kind of middle class genteel comedy with a naughty twist, without being offensive. I can imagine this being a serialised evening drama/comedy tv programme. The book is three sections, I suppose a bit of a send up of the whole erotica genre and current trend with the 50 Shades of Gray hysteria. Betty Berry, 65 when the book starts, finds her marriage over, her house remortgaged, and a loan shark wanting money he lent to her husband, back. Most people would just get a job, but that wouldn't make for good comedy, so prim and proper Betty Berry decides to write an erotic novel to cash in. The fact that she is painfully naive makes for some fun, as she ends up turning it unintentionally into quite a hard core thing. And people go nuts for it. Perhaps not the way she wanted to make her literary debut, as she had been working for the last twenty years on a twee romance about Richmond Tabernacle (strong in the office/shy in the bedroom) - oh, that tag line made me laugh. The second part is about her coming to terms with the fame, and the film they're making of her erotic novel; the third a few years later and Betty may have found love.
It's good light hearted summer reading.
April 3, 2014
Firstly, thanks again to the author for sending me a complimentary copy of this book for my entertainment!
Secondly, my face is sore from all the grinning I've been doing over the last three days because this book is HILARIOUS! Betty really reminds me of Hyacinth Bucket from Keeping Up Appearances, so prim and proper. She is so worried about what the neighbours/Vicar/Country Club will make of her if they find out about her saucy malarkey.
This book was a bit ruder than I thought it was going to be. This author writes books for kids about Trolls so I thought it was going to be very tame and I even told my mum that she could read it once I'd finished. May have to re-think that for a while. But it is so much cheeky fun and never offensive. Naughty but nice. Though, saying that, it's now on the TOP shelf of my bookcase until I decide whether or not to lend it to my mum.
Secondly, my face is sore from all the grinning I've been doing over the last three days because this book is HILARIOUS! Betty really reminds me of Hyacinth Bucket from Keeping Up Appearances, so prim and proper. She is so worried about what the neighbours/Vicar/Country Club will make of her if they find out about her saucy malarkey.
This book was a bit ruder than I thought it was going to be. This author writes books for kids about Trolls so I thought it was going to be very tame and I even told my mum that she could read it once I'd finished. May have to re-think that for a while. But it is so much cheeky fun and never offensive. Naughty but nice. Though, saying that, it's now on the TOP shelf of my bookcase until I decide whether or not to lend it to my mum.
May 26, 2014
Firstly a disclaimer. I received my copy as part of a Goodreads give away.
This book is the perfect antidote to those of us who tried to read the wildly popular trilogy of erotica and laughed.
I absolutely loved this trilogy. Whilst the main charter (Betty) as perfect the undoubted star in my opinion was Muriel. Some of the funniest parts for me where the parts were she bested Betty's enemies without appearing to really try.
Overall I really enjoyed the trilogy but the highlight for me was the wonderfully imaginative synonyms.
My one complaint is that the first two stories were to short and felt like they had the potential to be developed into a novel length story.
This book is the perfect antidote to those of us who tried to read the wildly popular trilogy of erotica and laughed.
I absolutely loved this trilogy. Whilst the main charter (Betty) as perfect the undoubted star in my opinion was Muriel. Some of the funniest parts for me where the parts were she bested Betty's enemies without appearing to really try.
Overall I really enjoyed the trilogy but the highlight for me was the wonderfully imaginative synonyms.
My one complaint is that the first two stories were to short and felt like they had the potential to be developed into a novel length story.
June 29, 2014
I really liked this book. It's hilarious. I was laughing out loud by page 5. This book contains both the first and second stories in the series, plus a short extra novella that expands the story past book 2. It is definitely worth reading all of them. I thought that the second book was even better than the first.
To be clear, this book is not erotica, even though it contains I guess what you'd call "adult themes". It is comedy and satire about erotica. A very fun read.
(I received a free copy of this book as a Goodreads First Reads giveaway.)
To be clear, this book is not erotica, even though it contains I guess what you'd call "adult themes". It is comedy and satire about erotica. A very fun read.
(I received a free copy of this book as a Goodreads First Reads giveaway.)
June 17, 2014
Although I enjoyed reading this book, I also found it a little disappointing, there was parts that made me literally laugh, and a few moments that left me rolling my eyes and hoping it picks back up again, after all I'm 'vanilla' yet I could see the pit falls of certain acts a mile off.
A friend has borrowed the book and so far thinks it is excellent so I'm guessing this one wasn't for me, but felt I had to write a truthful review on how I felt
A friend has borrowed the book and so far thinks it is excellent so I'm guessing this one wasn't for me, but felt I had to write a truthful review on how I felt
June 26, 2014
Cannot believe I put off reading this book, it is hilarious. Right from the first chapter I was hooked, truly some laugh out loud moments. A well written book with brilliant characters - I love Muriel, I couldn't help but I imagine Betty as Hyacinth Bucket.
Would definitely recommend and read again.
Would definitely recommend and read again.
June 29, 2014
Oh my goodness, this book is hilarious, literally laugh out loud funny. It was well-written, light-hearted and fun. The characterisation reminded me of a Janet Evanovich book, with funny characters that you fall in love with. My only dilemma now is whether I dare recommend a book to book club and my mother-in law that heavily features a my little pony butt plug!!
December 14, 2014
I laughed through every page of this. Epic. I am so glad I gave this a chance, usually I get bored after the first 20 pages of any books received through the Goodreads giveaway but this was hilarious. Loved it! I'll be laughing every time I remember this book.Excellent writing, good characters (specifically Muriel - she was my favorite). Job well done Rosen Trevithick!
own-or-going-to-own
April 9, 2014A 65 year old erotic romance...Hopefully will live up to my expectations!
August 6, 2014
This is a very funny, very British romp that's a cross between Hyacinth Bucket and FSOG! Lmao!
I was lucky to win a copy from Goodreads and would totally recommend to anyone looking for a LOL read! :)
I was lucky to win a copy from Goodreads and would totally recommend to anyone looking for a LOL read! :)
Want to Read
June 28, 2014I received a free copy of this book through Goodreads First Reads in exchange for an honest review.
August 8, 2017
So raunchy, so fun! I can't remember the last time I laughed while reading this hard. A true "fish out-of-the-water" story with characters that were engaging and delightful. Highly recommend!
May 14, 2019
This was a fun read. It was suggested to me by a friend that writes erotica, and I was a little reluctant to pick it up at first. It did not take long for me to find myself cringing, laughing and groaning in sympathetic embarrassment along with the characters.
I would recommend this to anyone that would like to read fun story about a woman that takes an interesting way to overcome the tragedy of a cheating husband and an unfortunate circumstance.
I would recommend this to anyone that would like to read fun story about a woman that takes an interesting way to overcome the tragedy of a cheating husband and an unfortunate circumstance.
November 16, 2017
OMG - funny!!! I love Betty...
March 16, 2019
A giggle and snort sort of read.
Displaying 1 - 21 of 21 reviews